Episode 79 - Simka Returns

Weird media. Him. Mister Walters, you see that guy. With it now, he's an actor I can't drive and the only camp driver in his place. Good evening and welcome tonight, mister Walter's a taxi podcast.

I'm HP, your co host and with me as always as my co host, Father Malone, Father Malone, Hawaii. This evening, I'm well, HP, I'm wondering how many times we're going to use the word stiptic this evening. Probably more in one evening than I have in my entire life. But we'll get to that. We're talking Taxi, Season four, episode fifteen.

Sim Cover turns yay. We're so happy this is gonna be a great one. Well that her presence doesn't necessarily mean great taxi. I mean it's but I think it does well. Well, we'll we'll we'll talk about why this well, you know what we're getting ahead of ourselves, are we?

This was written by Howard Goodwertz and Ian Praser, and it was directed by your new favorite director. It's Michael Zinberg from Tony's Tony's Gal or Tony's Lady. Whatever. The last episode was was that? Did I was that?

Are you having having fun with me here or did I mention that this direction was no and I and I. Think it's it's good here as well. I'm giving the man his props, I'm giving you your props. All right, Fine, so I won't I won't fight you for calling me out. As as you know, I'm not calling you out.

I'm giving you your your your you're giving you your flowers as a kid. I won't. I won't, I won't call you, I won't. Never mind. Cut all that, all right, we're absolutely not a reminder we're doing these shows in broadcast order and not in order of filming.

We begin, as we so often do, in the garage as Louie walks over to a poker playing Alex. He asks Alex what he's going to do about his problem. Alex is, what are you talking about? And Louis explains that, well, with Loca's girlfriend coming back, who's going to explain to her about Loca's multiple personalities? So I'd forgotten that this was another multiple personality slash Vic Ferrari episode followed.

Lon and I think I've mentioned in the past how I thought it was a gimmick that had run its course. Yeah, yeah, I disagree with you. I love Vic Ferrari any chance we get it, and he's on full display here, the romantic Vic Ferrari. I made that statement that I thought he was a gimmick, and I was wrong, because I think he's quite good here. Plenty of juice left.

Plenty plenty. But I think it is kind of odd that Louis is taking such an interest in Loca's love life that he wants to I don't know. That seems odd to me. I don't think he's at all interested in Loco's love life. He just relished the idea that he's going to ruin that person's day.

Once Samka finds out he's got multiple personalities, maybe she'll fuck off, and then Laka will continue to be miserable and they can all be miserable together because misery loves company. HB spend the night with Stephen King. I, well, I guess I didn't consider that angle. But it may be Louis way like you said, of ruining somebody else's day, So I guess that kind of makes sense. You know what, You're right.

I'm thinking about later a latter part of this episode, and the direction is actually really good. I did to call I didn't realize it was the same director, but there's a moment later that I was like, Wow, that's really cool. I'm being dead serious. I'm the one in the previous episode who I was initially casting aspersions at Zenberg, and you set me straight. So I'm again, I can't stress this enough.

You were right and I was wrong farfalong. So let's just get that. Let's get that out there. I don't need that. I'm not looking for that.

No, it's fine, though, So Alex takes umbridge at Louise typically insensitive referral to Laca's multiple personalities. I think he says something like he's who, he's cuckoo or he's loco. I don't remember what, but he. Said like a batshit crazy face and blow bloah, like a lot of tongue wagging, and yeah, basically what anyone's The general populaces outlook on mental health issues was basically embodied by Louis de Palma here, which is you're either okay or you're a fucking lunatic. Laka walks in, he's wide eyed as usual, and he's festooned with tissue paper dots all over his face, which we all we you know men, I say, we men recognize as the putting.

You know, when you cut yourself shaving, you put these little dots of tissue paper all over your face. Although I I'm trying to think, I don't know that I ever really did that much. When I would get cut, I would just kind of like staunch the bleeding with my finger. It would never last that long. Well, I don't know, did.

You raise analogy has improved dramatically over the past thirty years or so. Well, now we have five blades instead of just one. We should have twenty three. Isn't there an snl ad with like one hundred and fifty blades? Like it's true?

Well, I mean I'd gone through every fad. I've gone through the five six whatever blades I used to. I even tried the electric shaver, which never really did a very good job on my face. So I've done the paper, the toilet paper been a couple of times in my life, But mainly I didn't have to because I learned about the wonders of a stiptic pencil. Well, I was never see that's this is all new to me because I never I never learned about a stiptic pencil.

I would. I would always, like I said, I would either staunch it with my finger, or I would try to use some after shade which had alcohol in it, which would would burn like a motherfucker, but it would do the trick. So anyway, Locke has got all these little pieces of tissue paper all over his face. He says he wants to look good for Simca, and Jim asks if if this is if he's talking about his girlfriend, and then Tony and Elaine sort of tag team a quick exposition about Simca, because if I'm not mistaken, Jim wasn't around for the Simca episode. So that's pretty tough.

So Tony and Elaine show up to hammer home the fact that we're in the nineteen eighties with Elaine suddenly has fucking shoulder pads in her in her purple and orange Hannah Barbaras seventies villain character outfit, she looks like the Hallow Queen, you know, the Mage of Autumn or something. Well, I did, I did. You're getting ahead of me. I did mention her her outfit. I thought it was more Joker like, although Joker didn't really wear orange, but the purple and orange combo definitely seemed super villain esque.

Wellie, HP, you know, purple is the most legal of colors. It is this it's very royal, royal purple in fact. But I do want to mention Tony's haircut in this episode. It's it's late era Joan Jet. You know, once it had gotten down to like shoulder length, but still kind of curling towards her face.

That's what Tony's hair is doing here. He should be singing to do roun Ron. His hair is odd. But also, I don't know if you noticed, but there was something about the shirt that he was wearing that made him look super jacked. I don't know what it was, but he just looked like a mountain of a man.

Well, that's because he knew it wasn't going to be in this episode at all, so he had to make an impression not in it. Moment one moment, Luka says that he foolishly let Simca slip away without telling her that he loved her and he's not going to let her slip away again. He says she's the only girl for him in the whole world. There's something about I don't know if it's a fondness that Andy Kaufman had for Simca or the characters. He had a fondness for the characters.

But there's something special about the way Lotga talks about Simca and the way they they interact in this episode is we're going to see I found it delightful. I remember him being a cocksucker to Simca and that's why she left. I think we've got a lonely man here who realizes he's not going to get any play in America. He even says something to that effect. And and now Simka is returning to his life and he realizes that this is his last best hope at having a romantic relationship.

See I remember the ending of that Simca episode with Lotgo. To be more romantic in this episode than See No, No, You're You're a sap. You sentimental? I am sentimental. You at the time, you didn't like that end of that episode where he's he puts the coin in the jukebox and they do Summer Loving Summer Nights.

Punch him in the face, brother, like it's they it's this manufacturer were supposed to feel bad from. At the end of the episode, it's like, it's your fault, Like to deal with it. You've made that bedlon it my foreign friend. Look, I got a joke for you. Following up, Oh, how does a mountain girl make love?

How does a mountain girl make love? I forget? What? Like an angel as he tearfully looks into his beer and realizes the fucking mistake he just made? Heartstrings, my friend?

Heartstrings? No, no, no, no no. That's the mournful version of the Entertainment Tonight theme? How did you go from summer Nights to the John Tesh Entertainment Tonight? Them?

Because I thought about the the like the the similar sentiment of Entertainment Tonight. Playing a mournful version of their theme while they were showing somebody who had recently died has the same impact as Laca crying into his beer after being a dickhead to the to this sweet, beautiful woman who just wanted to love him. Nevertheless, Laka, for whatever reason, has realized the error of his ways, and he's not gonna let this chance slip away again. And I think I would like Tony to step in here and try to steal Simcoe away. Imagine that plot line.

That would be crazy. I can't even imagine, can you imagine that that would be tough, right. I mean with Tony's on the rebound from the the Tony's lady, the woman. Showed her right, yeah, like the rich woman. He was never getting her, but simca he could impress her with his boxing prowess.

Yeah, kid Rodriguez, Rightuez. So Alex tells Laca he's better get rid of all that tissue paper on his face. And actually, and here's where here we go, he says, Laka, you should be using a stiptic pencil, now, can you for the For people like me who have never used a stiptic pencil, and I mean literally never even held one in my hand? What is a stiptic pencil? Father la law?

It's a little medicinal pencil basically. I mean it's like a little stick and it's got fluid in it, and you rub it on the wound and it staunches the wound, it causes whatever whatever, uh you know, chemicals come to the skin to like stop the bleeding. It encourages that right away. My mother is a nurse, I should point out, so I've done since I was a tiny child what a stiptic pencil was, and then I should always have one when I mentioned you doing the method of toilet paper to staunch a wound. That was only because I was in a place in my life where I didn't have a stiptic pencil within reach.

Otherwise I always have one. Hmmm. And is it you said there's liquid, so it doesn't you. Don't sharply before? No, no, Before it was just sort of you rubbed it in the wound.

But now it's more of like a liquidity kind of thing. Oh okay, and it just eventually just runs out and you throw it away or do you reach it? Yeah? Yeah, basically yeah, Okay. I I have a full beard.

People who don't know, who haven't seen the picture of me on the on the podcast Masthead or whatever. But I don't. I don't really shave like a great deal. I only shave, you know, around my neck and above my beard, so I don't really I don't have a problem with cutting my face while shaving anymore. I have to shave a lot because I have makeup put on my face all the time.

Oh, I can imagine. Does this stific pencil hurt when you apply it? Is it alcohol? No? None at all?

I mean maybe a little bit of a bite but nothing, nothing like something like Macua chrome. Remember that in your house growing up, this glass bottle with a dropper that was also glass drop and sizzle. It was like it was like alien blood that stuff killed. That was bad. So Laca asks where he might find one, and before Alex can even reply, Jim says, here, you's mine, and he pulls a pencil from behind his ear.

Now Alex initially scoffs at this. He thinks it's just some stupid pencil, but then he quickly realizes that it's it's not just a pencil, it's actually a stiptic pencil. And this leads to one of my favorite jokes in the whole episode Father Alone. Alex asks Jim, like, why do you have a stiptic pencil behind your ear? And Jim's reply and I'm not going to do Jim, but Jim's reply is he says, well, in light of what happened, a better question Alex is why aren't you why don't you have one?

Since Laka needs one? Alex brilliant, great writing. As a lifelong styptic pencil carrier. I got to agree with Jim on that one. Ultimately, it's because we're so used to Jim the burnout, just throwing out weird non sequituries.

I don't know what it is. Ha ha. Yeah, this was. Such a cogent pointed remark that I just had to applaud because it was a rare moment of clarity from old Jim. I loved it.

Take her to my house. I'm having a luma. So so then Simca strides into the garage, she gets all this applause. Now we've already you and I fathered alone. I've already spoken of the marvelous Carol Kine in previous episodes.

But a side note, Carol Kane won the first of her two Taxi Emmys for this very episode. Ah, very good. She's really good in it. The Taxi team loved her so much they invited her back for another episode before finally, after that third episode, effectively, she was finally asked to join the cast as a regular member. So should have happened a season ago.

It really should have, because there's a like a spark when she's on there. Like we've talked at length about some of these regulars and how some fit in some didn't. You could tell from the get go that she fit in her style of acting, her comedy, everything meshed with the regular players, so I'm thrilled to see her look this season four, Father Blane. There's been some decent episodes and a lot of not so decent episodes, but this is questionable. This is such a like a ray of sunshine amidst all of that.

It's hard to get a negative vibe when Carol Kine is up there, and she's so that the role of Simca really. Fits her like a glove. She embodies the character almost exactly the way that Andy Kaufman embodies Latka. In my opinion, Yeah, I've never seen a bad performance of her, Missus Carol Caine, this is no exception. Obviously, I love SIMCA's character.

I've been waiting, actually the whole series for her to fucking come back. Honestly, should be noted a fellow Trek Fest co host HP. But she's She's been on all four seasons of Strange New Worlds. Was that her debut in Star Trek or was she in anything before that? I think she was in Picard, wasn't she.

I only saw season three, so I don't know. Oh no, maybe not no, but she may have done some minor of all or everything or something. But she's basically the enterprise's engineer until Montgomery Scott shows up. Simca asks the cabbys of Lacas here and they tell her that he'll be right out. Of course, he's busy dealing with his shaving mishaps, and Simca is relieved, telling them all that, you know, she really missed Loaka, and she confides that she didn't have a lot of luck with men lately, and you know, she's happy to maybe get Laka back in her life.

But Laka finally shuffles out and they greet each other. And I've always loved the Kaufman's kind of hesitant shuffle, his Laka shuffle. His head has always sort of bent forward. It always sort of resembled some sort of bird with his wide eyes and his crooked neck and his kind of like shuffling back and forth. It's just it's adorable.

The two of them make such an adorable couple. You know, it has to be said. I've seen the I've seen the light hp that the lightest named Vic Ferrari. Oh boy, well, can't. I can't go back to Lota anymore.

I'm sorry. See, I'm so shocked by this development, father Alone, I really thought you'd feel the opposite way. Now I'm over Locka and it's Goodye two shoes nonsense some with Vic Ferrari, do your job, Laka. Well this is that that was a good feature for Vic when they were going back and forth having a battle about the cleanliness of their work. Work, Actually you do.

Yeah. Laca and Simca they greet each other and at first they're talking in their own language until Simca tells Loaca they can speak English now because she's very comfortable speaking it now, And it made me forget that when we saw her previously, she was her English wasn't wasn't very good. So the two of them make a somewhat stilted plan to see each other for for a date, which prompts Louis to exclaim who this is just like Body Heat. What's interesting about that comment is two things, Father Malone. This is a bit of a side note.

Number one, It reminded me what a sensation the movie Body Heat was at that time. There was nobody hotter in movies at that point than Kathleen Turner. She was like this incredible sex pot in this movie. Remember, oh my god. Yeah, there was quite the stir over Lawrence Cansten's little sexualized thriller, but there hadn't been anything like that in a while, you know, like a good old fashioned two people wanting each other and breaking down doors to get it.

That's interesting in and of itself. The Body Heat was such a big deal at that time. But what I think is even weirder is that this is, in its own way, a presaging of de Vedo himself working with Body Heat star Kathleen Turner on not one, not two, but three movies in the future. He's going to do Romancing the Stone, its sequeled Jewel of the Nile, and what was the third movie fa. Them alone were of the Roses, of Course.

Which I loved. I saw that in the. Theater, Yeah I did not. I thought it was I thought it was a pretty good studio black comedy, big studio black comedy, but not not as darkly delicious as it thought it was. It wasn't as naughty as it thought it was.

I thought it was kind of interesting that Devido ended up working with Kathleen Turner. This throwaway line again and again and again. There you go. Maybe there's a fourth. I don't know.

Did they work on anything else. No, that's all I could I could think of. They should have worked together twice. There never should have been a Jewel of the Nile. Agreed.

Jewel of the Nile was a complete cash it. I mean, there's no reason to make a sequel to Romancing the Stone. There was absolutely no reason for him. It was a perfect movie man. Simca asks if they can just have lunch, and Laca says sure, and he makes a joke about having to shave first, obviously leading to another usage of the stipptic pencil.

No doubt, you. Should have come out all fucking bloody, just just a mask from the nose down, just red. Yeah, So Laka gives her a little peck on the cheek. It's a very sweet moment, before he goes back to shave yet again. Simca is.

She says she's relieved because Laka is the same sweet man that she left all those years ago. Alex hurriedly says, so long, and he starts to leave, obviously trying to avoid what Louis asked him to do. Side note, follom alone, this one's a good one. We used to mention the background players in the garage on the regular Remember they were like leggy pants lady with the spacesuit or whatever. Richard Saka I used to pop back there and do his thing, but we haven't done it for a while.

But I don't know if you noticed this, but Alex is turning to leave. A man and a woman walk past him into the garage as he's walking out. Did you notice them? I didn't. I feel ashamed.

The guy was a dead ringer for Jeff Foxworthy. You might be a redneck guy. I don't know where they found this guy, but he looked exactly like Jeff Foxworthy. It was crazy. Are we led to believe that Jeff Foxworthy was a cabby before he did the redneck jokes?

Do you remember when David Spade did him on Weekend Update and it was you might be the ebolavirus if you have an RNA strand. He did not do Jeff Foxworthy. Oh my god. It is one of the best. Wow, because you know he was not known for his impressions.

Well, no, he did Tom Petty, that's one. He did Michael J. Fox both very very good impressions. The Michael J. Fox was especially good.

They did America's Most Wanted. It was former child actors like Mindy Kohane is in there and and. All Michael J. Fox was Danny Bonaducci. Right that that that was he was hosting that week exactly.

And uh, Spade is killed with his Michael J. Fox impression. It was unbelievable. He looked like him. He had the mannerisms.

Very underrated mimic. I think, yeah, as as he was here again. Was it like a science program that he was hosting about. Oh no, no, it was it was like weekend update and they went so now here to talk about, uh, the the you know, ebola was in the news. So how to recognize that our science advisor, Jeff Fox, you might be the ebolavirus.

If oh, I hope that's on YouTube, I gotta check. Now calson bleed in from your ass and pores, you might be thevirus. Louis rings his cage bell to summon Alex back to break the news to Simca about Lacka's multiple personalities. So Alex uh takes Simca over to the coffee machine, which is I've noticed I've noticed over time is the spot when you're gonna have a heart to heart talk with somebody. Nine times out of ten, you're taking him over to the bench in front of the coffee machine.

I don't know why that is. Well, it's the only place that doesn't feature all the extras who have to pretend they're not listening to your conversation. I guess that. Yeah, no one behind you to distract from I guess that's true. Alex says, look, don't be alarmed.

I need to tell you something about Laka. But there's nothing. I assure you, there's nothing wrong. But I have to tell you this, and he explains to Simca about Lacka's multiple personalities, how he becomes a totally different person without even realizing it, and Simca has this word for it. She's like, oh, you mean he's cookie putt, which was a word that I was not familiar with.

I didn't know if it was something in her language or if there was something that I'm missing, but the close captioning was very specific. It was cookie putts. I think she was mangling and she was attempting to get him to take her to Carvel ice Cream. Oh, the cookie. Posts can get a cookie posts?

Yeah? Maybe very popular in New York at that time, the Carvell Hayce cream store. So we fade to Laca's apartment. Laca is dressed in this funky sort of light rust colored suit. Tope is it?

Tope? Okay, I couldn't come up with the color. It is top all day and all night man. And that the tie is like green and orange and crazy striped tie. It just like an Australian's nightmare.

HP can ask a question speaking of music, of course. Oh you're gonna talk about what's playing over the. Yeah, is it not Andy Kaufman doing an Elvis Presley impression speaking in Laca's language, doing wise man say love me tender? Oh he love me tender? Right?

Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, you're right where I'm going to father in love here. So Laca is putting the finishing touches on a romantic place setting with table for two, with candles and the whole bit. And as you said, over the soundtrack, he's playing a record and it's it's effectively an Elvis impersonator singing love Me Tender in Laka's language. And yes, you are correct, the singing voice is expert Elvis impersonator Andy Kaufman. As if anyone else was going to be allowed.

Else was going to do it I mean, yeah, he I don't know if we we've really talked about this in the past. We've been doing this for so long now. But people who you say to people, yeah, Andy Kaufman had an amazing Elvis impersonation. I think you're kind of joking because that's he wasn't really known for his mimicry necessarily. But anyone who doesn't understand that that concept of him doing this Elvis impersonation do yourself a favor.

Go to YouTube search for Andy Kaufman Elvis and it's it's incredible. It goes beyond mere mimicry. In my opinion, he really kind of embodies a certain type of Elvis impersonation. Right, Yeah, Andy Kaufman known for jokes and was doing jokes about impersonators, and the joke here is that his impersonation of Elvis is transcendent, Like that's yeah, it is, because it's the payoff to his foreign man character, right, doing impressions. So it's basically Laka saying, you know, a famous of a character, but as LAKA like not doing an impression of that character at all.

And then the last bit is and now I'm going to do Elvis Presley and he fucking turns into Elvis. Presley pulls out like he's got velcrow clothes on, so he's got the jumpsuit underneath, and he does the hair and into the thing and the lip starts going. The first the first to start doing the Elvis lip thing as an impression and an impression that Elvis himself saw and enjoyed. It's it's magical because, like you said, ultimately it is a punchline to the foreign man bit, but one gets the sense that he took a very particular pride in his in his impersonation and getting all these details right, and he sounds just like Elvis. It's it's really amazing how he, like I said, he embodies Elvis in a way that most impersonations just kind of get the surface level details right.

So of course it makes sense in this context that they would have Andy Coffin do the Elvis voice. And it's a very funny. It's not you know, they don't really call a to it. It's there, and if you take note of it, it's really funny because it's it's clearly love me tender, but he's you know, he's he's doing EBI da and all these well known phrases from his language. It's it's awesome, it's really really terrific.

Simca knocks at the door and Lotka turns down the music and goes and opens it. And oh, here's another side note, father moment. This this episode's full of fun little side notes. When he opens the door, and this is another great piece of set dressing. You can see the corridor clearly a run down apartment in New York, and you see the corridor beyond Simca.

Did you notice the graffiti on the wall behind her? No, you didn't notice this. I can't believe he didn't notice this. It's so obvious. I couldn't make out all of it because this is obviously not an HD program.

This is where dealing with the eighties and television wasn't that good. So I looked at it. Now, among the graffiti that I could make there's a lot more that's sort of blurry. But I did see it says go mets. It says eat a fish.

I don't know why it says it a fish, or if there's a punchline that just wasn't very visible. And it also has a heart with TM and JB on the inside of it, which which made me want to go online and see what James Burrows's wife was named. But she's not TM. It's not Maybe it is JB for James Burrows, but I don't know who TM is. Maybe maybe you can figure it out.

I don't know. There's also a five five to five number, which I thought was also a nice touch. So anyway, Simca comes in and they give each other and he gives her a little peck on the cheek. Loaka tells her, I hope you're hungry because I made something special, and she takes a little sniff and she yells warthog. Laca has made a delicacy from the old country, apparently some ward hoog.

So he brings to the table what looks like a giant leg of lamb. What did you think it looked like? Foul? It looked kind of gross. Look, there's a lot about this dinner that is kind of a little un settling.

He asks Simca if she would like something from the hoof or something closer to the tusk. There was ward hoog after all, and she says she wants both. And this just, you know, touches Blaca's heart and he says that's one of the things he loves most about her. She eats like a swine. Simca tells him that it's perfect.

Everything is just perfect, and then Laka offers her a glass of breafnish. Have we seen this joke in previous. Episodes, because I'm sure I told you the fact that on a New Year's even Venice, California went to a friends party and he had Romanian homemade wine that poured like syrup, like like like you know, pancakes syrup, and I was like, you want me to drink all of this? Like I like watching it slowly like ooze down the glass as it's like approaching My tongue. Was a horror, That's what this is.

So he gets the I think it may be the episode when he was going to go off to war. I think maybe that's the one that that that was featuring brefnish, because he brings out this bottle and he pours it and it pours like thick honey or something. But what really turned my stomach is it's colored bright green like it it looks like like it makes me think it's mint or something, which I don't really love mint. I'm not a big fan of spearmint catade. It's just he pours like he he pours the meat a glass of this stuff, and it's just so disgusting looking.

And they actually they actually take a drink of it, which I was I don't remember them drinking it when I saw it in that previous episode, but just the thought of that, I don't what do you think it tasted? Like? What do you think it was actually made of? To me, it looked like they had they had just melted down green apple candy, like you know, like the old. Like jolly rancher jolly oh, that was really what you were thinking of.

Okay, there's a rancher sticks you used to get in grade school. Yeah, like you know, just just throw a bunch of those in a pot and boil it down and while it's still sort of maybe add a little something that makes it not uh liquefies so much. Yeah, but wouldn't that have been really hot though? If it's melted candy? No, not if you had added some sort of thing that made it elastic and.

Like a guargum or something. Yeah, some weird like thing that these on set like food people are so like magical with you know, like, yeah, just just it with a little bit of sawdust, and now it turns into a cake and you're like. It just looked horrible, and I guess that's the point. So they take a drink and the Simca confides that she said many many lonely nights since they parted, and Laka agrees it's been much the same for him, which is why he was so glad to get her letter from Omaha, where I guess she lived for a while. This is something that's not really delved into in any depth.

I thought she just was living in New York and getting on with her life, but apparently she moved to Omaha for a period. Loka excitedly announces that he wants to tell her something. It's he says, it's the best evening he's had in a long time, and he's been dreaming of this evening for so long with her, and he wants to continue, but he hesitates, and Simca presses him on what he wants to say. What are you trying to say? Lock, what are you trying to say?

And after more hesitation, he's saying, this is a real mister McGee moment here. So he looks down he's he's sort of like stammering I and he doesn't. Then he looks up and he sniffs the air disdainfully, and all of a sudden, we're back in Vic Ferrari land, he says. Vic says, what died in here? The warthog obviously not not hitting him the same way that it hit the two of them.

Vic saying it, like saying what everyone's thinking. True true, Simkus's latka and Vic replies, oh boy, here we go again. So we got we got the full on Vic experience here, and he introduces himself to Simca. Simca, remembering Alex's warnings, says she better go, and Vic starts flirting with her in a typical swinger fashion, and surprisingly she reciprocates. Hey, hey, whoa this was This was not typical swinger fashion.

This was courting. This was this was actual sort of of romantic gestures that were going on here. Like you could say everything that coming out of his mouth was a line, but they aren't typical lounge lizard Vic Ferrari bullshit here like this is him wooing her and her responding in kind. And I say this because this is my favorite part of any relationship. And and I loved this scene when he's when he's like speaking to her about her and she's going like wow, Laca could never say anything like that, like she's swooning effectively.

Brother, he but he, that's that's fine. But he is such a lothario. How can you ascribe anything like cording to what he's doing. These are just lines that he's feeding. They're not just the lines to get her into bed.

Not in this case. We've seen Vic ferrari typed lines. He delivers them all the time because there's always a tinge of grossness to them. These are not that these are compliments directed at her. I don't buy it.

Vic has been born. Do you remember how Vic was created? Loaca went spent like a week with a whole stack of playboys reading them to understand the American man member to uh to live in the. F you saying that a playboy I can't know love? How dare you show yourself out?

All right night, mister Walter's people's take it over. No, No, I'm suggesting that he he boiled down the the the superficiality of late seventies, early eighties, uh, you know, brow behavior, and he created a monster. Right, and what and what you said about him in previous episodes was true. They ran out of the juice in that particular character track, and in this episode suddenly there's a whole new interesting facet, which is Simca falls in love with not Laca while Locke at the same time, which is vic Ferrari. So what you're saying, HP, if these are all just lines to get her into bed, you're impugning Simka's character, You're making her less than she is, You're robbing her of agency, sir, and I will not let you do.

That, not at all. What I'm saying is Simca is at a point where she cannot understand the real bounds between Vic Ferrari and Laka. To her, it's still Laka, So in her mind. It absolutely is not, because as soon as Lack comes back, she's like, yeah, you're a dud. But that's only after she's had the vic experience.

Right. What I'm saying is she she doesn't delineation. I disagree with you. She has been told what the situation is, she knows the scenario, and then suddenly it's like, hey, I'm vic Ferrari, and she goes along with it. She even comments like, this is the way you're talking to me.

He is incapable of doing. But no, I think what you're doing, You're what you're doing is you're making her out to be much more superficial than we know her to be. No, because you don't believe Vic Ferrari, So therefore you think that that she's like under his spell or something like that. I'm saying he's being sincere and she's being sincere. I don't think there's a sincere bone and Vic's body.

But well, that's because you don't give people second chances HP and I do. I'm sorry, I believe in the second act of a person. Give me a break. Really, you're gonna buy this vict this Vic Ferrari bullshit. Come on, I'd like to I think you your language is hostile.

You might, I might turn into Vic Ferrari. Could be I don't know. We'll see. So anyway, regardless of you know, he she what's going on? Uh, she does reciprocate his flirting, and in fact, I one could say that Simka's putty in Vic's hands.

She's responding to his every romantic, dudo romantic line. I would say, eventually, I'm waving you off. You can't say, listen, I'm waving him off. He's way he's way off. Once again.

This is a man who falls for Angela episodes, so don't okay. Of course you would bring up Angela again eventually set Eventually they kiss and they kiss again and it's leading to something much more. They go to bed brother like that. This works because he's sincere, she's sincere. So they have a great night together.

And now we're stuck with this loser, fucking Locka again. So we fade commercial and we fade back in with this is maybe the b roll that we've never seen before. It's sunrise over what I believe is the Brooklyn Bridge as a very sensitive Bob James piano line kind of comes in. It's it's a great image and sound kind of coming together. I don't know that we've seen this be roll before.

Do you remember seeing it? I don't seen it before. Very effective. That's because we have a new director who probably went, do we have any b role we haven't seen yet? And then what we got this bridge thing.

It's the direction is very solid in this. It makes me question, why wouldever have you know impugned his talent because it's wonderful. Not you know, I want James Burrows back, but I think this guy Zenberg is really good. So we fade into back into Laca's apartment, is Simca is singing in her language as she's setting the table for breakfast, like they've, like you said, they make She's not like going so far as to wear his shirt like over her like underwear to convey like, oh, she just threw on whatever was there. But it's pretty clear that they had sex.

I mean, it's obvious. It's the next day she spent the night, they spent the night exactly. So she's she's, you know, floating around the apartment and Laka emerges from the back bedroom and his underwear is Simica gleefully shouts baby cakes and gives a very confused Loaca big hug, and she immediately figures out that it's Laka and not Vic. Do you think Chuck Pollinik was a fan of this episode before writing Fight Club because this feels a lot like this feels a lot like Marla Singer the next day with Ed Norton, and she's like, what's going on? Why are you treating me like shit?

All of a sudden. It could be because there is an element of of that and Laka's sort of split personalities. I never thought of it in that sense, but you might be onto something. Father along the germ of fight Club begins here with Simca, Yeah yeah, yeah, sim Marla, Marla, Simka. Marla Simica.

Solaka asks, you know what's going on? Why are you still here? And he has apparently no memory of what happened the previous night, and Simka explains that they had a wonderful time and she says that he was very funny and he was charming, and he mentions that his name was Vic, and this immediately sends Laca into a rage. The mere mention of Vic upsets him greatly. And we've seen them kind of go back and forth, the little battles that the two of them have, so it's not not surprising in the least.

He's just he's just mad because Vick is better than him. Well, it's a very odd dilemma because ultimately she had sex with with Laka only does it does it count as him having sex with Simbica if he has no memory and had no agency over his body. No, Effectively, Simca is cheating. On him Laca with himself. With himself, so he can't even do anything.

There's there's nothing, there's no one to confront. No, and and he and he has he he has not been able to derive any pleasure from from from the act either. I mean, he can't get mad at anybody, and he can't. You know, Yeah, I mean the thing is hpe he's not invited, Like he's sorry, pal, it ain't you. To think of the ramifications of this.

The mind kind of reels a little bit, and it's easy to see why he would be so upset, putting aside their prior rivalry. I mean, the fact is, like you said, he wasn't invited. He may as well have not touched Simka at all. For as much as he remembers of the situation. He didn't mean there's a whole other character who just in his situation.

That other character just doesn't exist, but it is him. It's like a Philip pay Dick novel. Consider this. Let's say Vic murders somebody. Yeah, it wasn't that the crowded room was that that screenplay eventually turned into a movie.

Jim Cameron was going to make it a millionaires ago about somebody put on trial for murder, but it wasn't them, It was one of their personalities that did it. So how do you deal with that? How do you how do you deal with it? Is? How do you how do you assess guilt when you had no agency over your actions during that that act.

It's I mean, this is just a silly sitcom. But you know, I mean you could you could plot this out into infinity as to what he'd be responsible for or not be responsible for. Well, this is the source of basically you know, half the thrillers right where the person wakes up with no memory of what happened and there's a bloody knife in their hand, and now we have to work our way back. You're saying that when someone is drunk, they're effectively another personality. No, I'm saying drugs.

No, because I'm not giving the reason why the person is blacked out at all. Like I'm saying, that's part of the mystery of the thing. It doesn't necessarily have to be that. It can be something like a memento where there there is something going on neurologically where they only remember fifteen minutes at a time. You know, it's a.

Fascinating thing to roll around in your head and try to think of the ramification. And a side note, HP, I've been watching a lot of Battlestar Galactica and nobody knows if they're a cylon or not and at all times and there's and people wake up to it all the time, and they they have no idea that this was their previous life, like I mentioned Philip K. Dick, but like you know, that is the central thing. And blade Runner or do Android stream of electric sheep right, A lot of these these replicants don't have any idea that they're replicants like and then they have to wake up to that reality at one point. It's a horrifying.

Notion, interesting thought puzzle. This whole vict versus Loaca thing Loka. After Simca says well he was so wonderful, Loca says it wasn't me. And then Loaca declares and this is kind of we're getting a little bit of the Laka from the previous Simca episode. Laca says that Simca has shamed him, She has degraded herself.

She has just raised her family, she has cheapened her people, and she has blemished her planet and This is where maybe some of the sympathy for a Lota goes back out the window because that's a little hard. She curious, that's that. Simca angrily gathers her things and she says, I hate you. I never want to see you again, and thank you for a wonderful night. And she leaves good line, well delivered.

Well delivered. Right, this is Carol Kane is so good, so good. That she have we mentioned that she's adorable by the way, like like in this show with already one goddess, now this elfin queen comes striding in just to go like, hey, I'm also wacky too. I can fucking I can yuck it up as funny as anyone on this show, which maryleu Henter cannot do. No, no, she Carol Kane has chops that as much as we love maryleu Henner, there's things that Caine does that she cannot do.

In the Lovees book, there's a little mini interview with her and she says how when she came back for this episode, initially she didn't understand how to best deliver the comedy. She tried too hard to be funny. Father Malone and and the producers They raked her over the calls for it, and they said, this is not how you do it, and she learned how to be funny without trying to be funny. I guess it's it's a very uh there's a lot of subtlety there, funny. It seems not subtle because she's so forceful.

But I do think this points to the idea that there's a fine line between acting funny and just being funny, and that's what she is. She is just funny. Natural, Yeah, naturally funny, That's what I meant. We fade back into the garage as Alex notices Laka lying under the cab. Alex tells him, look, you've been under that cab all day.

Come on, something's happened Laca. Let's talk about Loaca. Laca tells Alex and Elaine, who's also by the same cab. This is a. Moment of direction I mentioned earlier, because Elaine and Alex are on either side of the open hooded car and Loaca is lying underneath it, and Laca has a work light under there, so there's this bright white light shooting up from the from the engine of the car, so it looks like that it kind of looks like the pulp fiction briefcase or you know, like the or something from Greece or something like that.

And it just conjured this idea of this like angel devil shoulder thing. Yeah, exactly right. And here's the thing, Like they kind of did this in the in the Tony episode two where Alex and Eline came like slithering out of the darkness to like give advice and like, and now that they're doing it again, and I just I like the idea of them swooping in and giving relationship. Oh, someone's relationship is in trouble, Alex, let's go just perched there. It makes me appreciate the way you say that.

It makes me appreciate Zienberg's direction all the more. I think these are things that aren't They don't call attention to themselves, but it is interesting to kind of analyze how he's composing these blocking these shots. I think it's really cool. You can only go to the coffee machine so many fucking times, you know, like, so there are only so many setups you can do in this garage and I haven't we haven't seen that one yet. It's very clever.

So Loka tells them both that Simca has found another man in Elaane sympathetically. This is a little odd the way she says it. I know what she meant. But she says that she can't tell Loka how many times that's happened to her, which maybe go what how many times somebody left her for another man? Like it seems.

I think what she was trying to say was, I can't tell you how many times I've been dropped by someone who left me for somebody else. I'll take it that way. You can either way with that, I think. I suppose, and no judgment whatever. How many times she's dated some guy and it turned out he was gay?

You know, it probably has occurred to her. When Laka explains to a Lane that the other man in this case is Vic, the Lane instead just kind of washes her hands, watched Tuck to Alex. She walks off Tuck to Alex and walks away. This is too much for her. Alex asks Latka to let's go grab some coffee and we'll talk about it, and that special heart to heart area of the coffee machine and locker refuses and stubbornly Alex grabs a rope connected to that board you know this is interesting.

Do you know what that thing is called? That thing that mechanics use to roll around under the car? Is it like a scoot around or something? No, it's not. But I did some research.

I actually found this out. I looked it up. The actual name of this thing. It's called a creeper, or more specifically, a mechanics creeper. Do you ever hear that?

I know I heard it. In my youth we had one. My dad was a mechanic, a car mechanic, so was he really Yeah, we had one in my garage that I used to roll around on when I was a kid. It always looked like fun to me as a kid, like kind of a little sled that you. Could's and like as a kid, you there is the clearance under a car is so wide, like you just you don't need to put the car up at all, You just go sliding under there.

Yeah. No, I just never knew that there was a specific name for it. I dated a girl once whose father had built his own garage in the backyard and he did not have a set of creepers to go into the car. He actually built these little like tunnels under the car so you'd pull your car in and there was a little stairway and you could actually walk, so you know, it was subterranean below the car and stand up and work on the car without having to lay down on your back. I thought it was pretty I've never I've never seen that up to that point.

Oh yeah, well the most most mechanic shops will have that, right, It's a little unusual in someone's garage. Made more sense to me than having to roll around on your back and kind of deal with gravity in that fashion. So anyhow, yeah, but it's cool to roll around on your back in those things. It is, especially if you're a kid. Sure, you roll out and like you could say something dramatically and roll back under you.

Right, like something out of Grease or one of those kind of movies. So so he so Alex yanks this rope and effectively sleds Loco over to the coffee machine. And Alex says to Loca he finds it hard to believe that Simca would prefer Vic to him, and Loka says, well, no, I have evidence, because he found two airline tickets in Vic's sport code to Bermuda, and Alainne says, well, just because Vic has these tickets, doesn't mean that she's going. And then Laca says, look, look what I found in vix veloor smoking jacket. It's a note that says I will be at your place tonight promptly at seven ish, signed Simca.

Loaca is frustrated, and he says that Vic is more fun in his pockets than Locke has had his whole life. Elaine tries to tell Loaca, look, although Simca may prefer Vic, there's a lot of women that would love your more innocent qualities, and Laca says something to the effective there just aren't enough women who prefer timid, weak men, and that, I guess goes to your point, father Malone. Of course Vic is going to be the better catch, because he's assertive and strong. And romantic and tells her she's beautiful and rare and special and not just I missed you. Oh you've done something I don't like.

I curse you into the ground. You should fucking die. Maybe Vic just doesn't do that anyhow. Alex says he's just gonna sit there and mope. Why don't you start thinking of Simca?

Are you gonna let a guy like Vic go out with Simca, and and furthermore, Alex says, you're responsible for this. Laca realizes that he's he has kind of made it possible for Simca to meet Vic. He has been he's been a dickhead, and his regular personalities just ain't working at all, and so like suddenly he had to resort to this whole other guy who up until now has just been to the Lothario character. But turns out the Lathario like has a fucking purpose, which is that's something Simca actually responds to. We will agree to disagree.

I think these are just lines that he's throwing out there. I don't believe that Vic has actually learned the error of his ways, and he's lonely. He just needs the love of a good woman. He should cry into his beer after telling her that she's a fucking piece of shit because she was in a different region than him growing up, right, and then and then just. Cry I'm so lonely without her.

And then she shows back up and he does something she doesn't like, and he tells her she should be ashamed of herself and that she's degraded herself and she's a blemish on the planet. You're right, what a fucking prick that Lothario vic is. What what people can't see, what listeners can't see, is the Malone goes on. He goes into the rant zone and he actually grabs his mic with his hand, brings it up clothes so he can really truth tell tell you listeners, he's taking control. Laca is in bold and he says he's gonna save Sinka from that two big Bosanova vic La.

That is no, it's good, it's a good line. So then he he rushes out. As we fade into his apartment, there's a there's a knock at the door and Simca enters and she's carrying a suitcase. Father alone off to Bermuda with wait to watch, let's go with them. That sounds more interesting than hanging around with Laka for even a second more.

Oh boy. So they sit at the table and Laka tells her there's something important that he needs to to say. First, he apologizes. He apologizes father Malone for getting so mad at her the other day. Next, Laka tells Simka that she must stop seeing Vic.

What you guys can also see his father Malone is flipping me off right now. He's so incensed Uh. Shes got to stop seeing Vic. No, you got to stop seeing me. Get out of here and bring Bick out off of Bermuda with him.

He says there's one more thing that he wants her to know. And ever since she came back, he doesn't know what he's doing. He can't sleep, he can't eat, his work is suffering. He says, please don't go to Bermuda again with Vic because and he's hesitating, and Simka presses him and he starts again with the eye before he reverts back to Vic and Uh. Simka tells Vic that she wants Loka back, and Simca.

Based on absolutely nothing. She says she doesn't want to go to Bermuda anymore. She wants Laka second ago. She was down for going to fucking Permuta. She's gonna fucking suitcase in her hand.

And then he's like, I can't sleep and she's like, no, you're right that man, he's a meanie. Get out of here. Can we cut back to the garage or something. Hey, yeah, you're having Jim being a burnout somewhere. Can we go do that?

Wow? Here I thought, oh man, you. Thought we were aligned. I think we're going to be pretty far apart. This is crazy.

Vic tells Simka, look, if I go off that door, I'm never coming back. And she just says, all right, bye, Vic, see you, opens the door for him, and Vic tells Simca she blew it, baby, and he walks out. Simca closes the door, and which is followed by Loca coming in. He's yelling into the into the corridor like Vick is walking. He's like, oh, and another thing, I never want to see you here again.

Blah blah blah blah blah. By the way, there was another bit of graffiti in the background. Did you notice this one? It's it's a it's a piece that we didn't see already. It's it says Tommy loves mouse and I have no idea what that means.

Tommy loves the girl named mouse or a mouse. I guess. So that's their nickname mouse. Yeah, I'm a little short person. Maybe you've never known a mouse?

No, oh, come on, man. Loca finally tells Simka there's something he needs to tell her, and he's he doesn't want to beat around the bush anymore. He tells Simca that he loves her, and she excitedly says me too. They passionately kiss as we go to credits. Now that's the episode.

We're going to talk about yellow lights? Now, what doesn't yellow light mean? It's a reminder we grade every episode on a scale from one to five yellow lights. One is the worst taxi episode and five is the best. And as is our custom, we're gonna kick it to you, father Blon, what do you give?

Simka returns? I give it four yellow lights? WHOA? No kidding? Really?

Oh yeah, I think it does. Sure, you're gonna give this two yellow lights? No, it deserves three, but I'm giving it an extra one just because of Cary Okaine obviously, Holy moly, Why I didn't I didn't hate the episode, you know. I I know they had to contrive that ending to get us back to square one because it's a sitcom. But the journey there was an interesting one, and I thought there were lots of laughs here and uh and I didn't hate any of Elaine's outfits in this one, because she comes back in a second purple outfit halfway through the episode, which when she's at the car with alex So and the direction was a nifty I you know, I thought, so I don't hate the episode or anything.

It's just that I can't stand Locke as a character. If you're stacking him up against Vic Ferrari, I don't agree with you there. But funny enough, we did arrive at the same place. I gave this episode four yellow lights as well. Now I probably would here.

The thing of it is like, there's not much for the rest of the cabbys to do, really, and that is always for me, that's typically a hallmark of a perfect taxi episode. But because all we really have this is essentially just a two hander with Simca really three if he counted Vic, I guess technically. But when an episode is this funny and the impact of this character of Simca is this seismic, it really does deserve a pretty good score, and that's why I gave it four yellow lights as well. So, surprise, surprise, we got to the same Father Malone. I'm shocked.

Ah, well, you know, stranger things have happened. I guess, so, so four yellow lights from me, four yellow lights from father Malone. That's going to do it for this episode of night, mister Walters. Father Malone, what are you up to when you're not clocked into the garage? Oh, geez too much.

I have a show called Midnight Viewing. It's on twice a week Mondays and Fridays. Fridays is a weekly round up where we do current things that are streaming at Theatrical and HP is frequently helping me there with the news that we do there. And Monday show is either a fest we're doing Von Doomfest looking at all the MCU movies and or tales from the Unexpected Rold Donald's horror anthology series, which I do with Mike White from the Protection Booth. I also have a Patreon channel.

This is too long winded, take it away, HP, go do all those things. Go Midnight Viewing Patreon dot com, slash Father Malone seventy one. Oh no, just Father Malone, Just Father Malone. I've often said, you've heard me on this podcast say Father Malone is the busiest podcast around. There's more content than you can shake a stick at.

For myself, I host a Noise Junkies music podcast, and I also have a band campsite hpmusicplace dot bandcamp dot com. By the way, fatherom Alone working on a new album, getting very very close, very very exciting. I'm always hesitant to ask because I don't want to make you feel better if you're not. But that's exciting. No, I've been lately very very inspired for whatever reason, so so look for that hopefully in the not too distant future.

But for all you listeners, thanks again for joining us. Please feel free to subscribe to the podcast, read a review, or rate us. We'd love to hear from you, and as I mentioned earlier, the email address is Hpmusicplace at gmail dot com. For myself and father Malone, thank you so much for listening, and we'll see you here again next time.