71.2: Attack of the Least Scary Animals on the Planet

Attention! Attention! Ladies and gentlemen, attention! There is a herd of killer rabbits headed this way and we desperately need your help. Roll up your windows.

Turn on your lights and follow the police car at the entrance of the theater. Please keep calm and cooperate with the authorities. Do you read me? The following feature has been rated R by the Motion Picture Association of America. It is intended for mature audiences and parental discretion is advised.

It's showtime, folks. Enjoy the show. In your Easter bonnets With all the thrills upon it, you'll be the grandest lady in the Easter parade. This is J.T. Petty, and you're listening to Movie Meltdown.

And when they look you over, I'll be the proudest of fellas. And the Easter parade. It's time for Sofa Theater. I tell you, Elgin, these rabbits are eating me out of house and home. Well, I've arranged to have Professor Taylor meet us in my office.

Now, wait a minute. Not that guy. Why not? He's the one that got rid of your coyotes for you. Yeah, well, he's just a little bit too good.

I haven't heard a coyote yapping around there for over a year. Now, that's terrific news for the rabbits, but it's lousy for me. I mean, there's a balance to these things, Elgin. It's tricky. Yeah, I know it is.

Look, I got a thought. There's a young couple here from the East on an exchange program. The name's Bennett, and they're looking for new ways to control insects without killing everything else at the same time. I have rabbits, not bugs. There's nothing left for a bug to live on.

You trust me, Cole. They won't go around killing everything in sight. I'll get up there to see them right away. Mushrooms color wizard grace. Every morning, giant rabbit for lunch.

Giant rabbit, do not fear. We are only three little junkies. Fuck off, damn it, giant rabbit. We are only. Welcome to Movie Meltdown Sofa Theater.

Once again, I am Brian. Hi, this is Roger. I am still Misty. I'm still Jay. And this is Rod.

Marlena has wandered off. She was frightened. She couldn't handle the movie. She had to leave. I couldn't fucking handle it.

I'm like in a bad mood right now because of that movie. Seriously, it sucks. I thought at one point you got up and came in here and sat down. I wanted to. I almost wanted to come back.

Go outside. Are you going to. Sleep cream off of it anyway? I have a cigarette. He was trying to.

I was trying to. He got up and stormed out of the room. He was like, worst movie ever. God. Oh, well, this week's special Easter extravaganza edition of Sofa Theater features the horrific tale, Night of the Lepus.

If by horrific you just mean bad and unwatchable, then yeah, you have this movie right here. This is a movie they would have crammed on Channel 41 at like 11 or 12 o'clock. Yes, they would have. And did. And did, I'm sure.

Right before the national anthem. I'm starting to think we should have just watched Peter Cottontail because everybody hates Easter right now. Oh, I was right. It is early 70s. The year is 1972.

Director William F. Claxton. And I hate him. He's the shocker. Oh, well, we don't want to ruin what we thought of the movie yet, so we'll get to that in a minute.

Oh, sorry. I don't think it's made clear what we think it is. Oh, I do like the tagline. They were born in that tragic moment where science made its great mistake. Now from behind the shroud of night they come, a scuttling, shambling horde of creatures destroying all in their path.

Bunnies, it must be bunnies. Guys in bunny costumes. Yeah. Oh, so. This is the infamous giant rabbit movie with Dr.

McCoy in it. That's usually how you. Hear it described. He wasn't in it near enough. That's true.

You couldn't see DeForest from the trees. I just realized that this whole shit wouldn't have gotten started if it hadn't been for that fucking stupid kid and her damn bunny rabbit. No! It's all her fault. That other little brat that was like, no, let it go.

It's killed my other... Like, smack that kid. I don't know how long this is, because it seemed like three hours, but it was at least 90 minutes of rabbits running in slow motion. The sounds, it sounded like they were underwater. It was unnatural.

Much like giant bunnies, it was messing with you. It was the composer's kid farting in the bathtub, because that's. Basically what it sounded like. The score was on a loop. All the bunny scenes were on a loop.

All the bunny attack scenes were on a loop. Everything was on one huge, gigantic loop. It was like, what, two pages of dialogue or something? I think most of it was, yeah, the slow motion bunny running. Oh my god.

It was ridiculous. I mean, get it. They're big fucking bunnies. Don't show us. This over and over and over again.

Holy shit on a stick. It was horrible. I mean, the hardest thing for a cinematographer ever to do is to make a bunny look scary. And it's an epic fail. They still don't look scary.

They tried to find the ugliest bunnies from the close-ups possible. And they slapped gravy on their face. They put ketchup or something all over them. Yeah. Some of them just had gravy.

It was like brown. Gravy. I don't know. There's some times. Power teeth.

Imagine. Yeah, the teeth are scary. They still could make them scary. There's some of them that are disturbing. There's something about Bloody Bunnies.

As I said last year when we watched the other Bloody Bunny movie. There's something disturbing about that. There's just something weird about it. This movie is really bloody. They do not skimp on the blood and it's that thick.

Hammer looking orange. Herschel Gordon Lewis color blood stuff. It's not the thin stuff. It's thick almost like paint. It's brighter than any other color in the movie.

It's brighter than any color in this movie. There's a lot of it. it's every bunny that gets bit gets doused. You never see any other than the first guy's missing like his arm it's thrown off to the side but after that there's no actual impact there's no like bunnies eating hollowing. Out your body it's bad and it's just people that got doused. With red paint their clothes are always messed up my finger painted all over the bunnies hate those clothes but they don't ever really get into the flesh so much yeah they just don't like the stupid clothes they wear.

Almost the 70s. I'm proud they didn't tag Janet Leigh then with her fucking outfit. You love those outfits. Speaking of Janet Leigh, what other people's careers were tarnished by this turd? Oh, wow.

Well, I can give you her reason for it. They had it listed as to why she made this movie. Didn't she have to. Be in town anyways? No, it said, yeah, Janet Leigh said in an interview, regards to Night of the Lepus, I'd forgotten as much as I could about that picture.

She also went on record saying her reason for taking the role in the film is simply because it was close to her home in California and meant less time away from her family. Yeah, that's the same thing Bruce Campbell said about My Name is Bruce. Yeah. The thing is, has anybody seen the trailer for this? No.

I don't think I have. The trailer. It doesn't exist? No, it's on there. The trailer probably doesn't tell you what it's about.

That's the thing. The trailer's awesome. What? What? Happened that night science made its greatest mistake.

What unknown terror. Was born that night? What is the terrifying mutant that strikes from behind the shroud of night. Like the trailer is really really cool because it's got this big build-up it's got this big voiceover and it's just like it's kind of that the same thing that the little synopsis there or the their tagline was it's got this crazy ominous like creatures coming to get you in the night kind of build-up and the most they show you is like the big super close-up of rabbit's eye other than you never get anything else it's like cut scenes from like The people walking around, looking out the window, about to get attacked. I wonder how many kids and people this film disappointed.

Because even the title. I mean, if you don't know what Lepus is, that's not a word you hear every day. You wouldn't know what that was. Most people don't know what Lepus is. What is that?

Is that the phylum or something? I think it's Latin. It's Latin for rabbit. It's also Latin for werewolf, too. There you go.

Lupus. Lupus. Oh, there you go. So anybody who's almost thinking, they're not quite. Were-rabbits.

Like, I'm going to see one of them in our werewolf movies. Because, I mean, if they called the movie Night of the Bunnies, I don't think anybody would go see it. Well, that's why. See, that's the thing. That's why I give them credit for marketing on this thing.

Because, yeah, the trailer's awesome. Doesn't show you any rabbit shots of any way. They said the, I'm trying to think, it was originally supposed to be titled Rabbits, but MGM felt the title didn't suit a horror movie, and they had to rename it. This movie didn't suit a horror movie. They had to rename it the more sinister Night of the Lepus.

It's going to be the. Old bait and switch, kind of like in Glorious Bastards. This is probably the nadir of Janet Lee's career. Yeah. Maybe the nadir of DeForest Kelly's career.

This was the last regular movie he did. Not so much. Wow. This is a typical run-of-the-mill film for Stuart Whitman. Pretty much.

Yeah, this was the last non-Star Trek movie DeForest Kelly ever did. Really? He had a fantastic mustache. Just shut him down. Yeah, really.

They were like, you know what? No more acting for you. You know what, DeForest? You're not picking scripts for a while. Stick to the Star Trek scripts.

Why don't you just cash that Star Trek paycheck? You'll be okay. Where else to go with this? Well, the thing I noticed was, again, this is something that you don't see now. Like, again, if they made a movie now, there's no way in hell they would make all the main characters in it are old.

Yeah. I was like, because it was even funny. The one guy in the beginning is like, well, there's this young couple. And then they show Janet Leigh, who's like, what, 55, 60, and this? I was like, young couple?

My ass. Yeah, really. I was like, and the other guy's older. Is this one of the young couple's moms? Yeah.

I was like, the guy's older than she is. I was like, young couple? Every time I look at Stuart Whitman, his hair is so black. I mean, it looks like he just took a bath and hair dye. You know?

It's like, oh. That and his eyebrows. Yeah. Yeah. They're all out of control.

Misty had pointed out his eyebrows needed some major manscaping. Because they were. They were curled up. They remind me of your dad's eyebrows. Yeah, my dad.

Before your mom got a hold of them. My mom manscaped my dad's eyebrows. It's pretty fucking funny. What's even weirder about this movie is it's played absolutely straight. Oh, yeah.

There's no camp factor at all. No, no, no. Not at all. Which almost makes it better. In fact, it should be epically great, but it's not.

Oh, it's so serious. Yeah, it's, it's play. And that's the thing. I mean, you would think people would just have a real, like they're, they're standing out there and you're on the bullhorn and they're like, all right, the town's about to be attacked by giant bunnies and like, just continue on. Like nobody's like, wait, what?

Shouldn't people be questioning this shit? Yeah. Well, it's like that part where the cop dries up. Everybody's sitting at the drive-in and the cop drives up, gets out, he's got the megaphone. There are giant rabbits heading toward the drive-in.

Giant killer rabbits. Well, of course. Don't you think everybody would just be like, fuck you. Some sort of promotional thing for the drive-in this weekend. I love coming to the drive-in.

We get free popcorn now, right? We don't have to put up with this bullshit. By the way, rabbit legs on sale at the concession stand. Tonight's special feature, Hossenpfeffer. So, ah, Lord, I don't know.

It would have been great if there was an Elmer Fudd character in this movie. Oh, if there was anything that could have made it a little cheesier. Don Knotts or something like that. I'm a hunter and a rabbit. Shh, rabbit fact.

Oh, man. So, I mean, the one thing I will give them, and some of these little set pieces were ridiculously well made. Very meticulous. Yeah, they cram a lot of live shots of rabbits running. A lot.

A lot. A lot. A lot. In through these, like, miniature sets. And some of the sets, like, again, it's so ridiculous that you're obviously like, okay, obviously that's a tiny little set.

But if you weren't... Props to Marlena's grandfather who actually worked on it. Building some of those sets for this. Movie supposedly made yeah a lot of sets and she said usually he did full size sets but on this one supposedly made a lot of the tiny little sets that the bunnies are ravaging So, yeah, I think that stuff looks good. The people in the bunny suits attacking the horses does not look good.

That's a whole other thing. Anytime you have to cut to a guy in a bunny suit, it just looks like a guy in a bunny suit. It's an Easter bunny. And it's an obvious scale differentiation from the huge bunnies that are as big as cars almost. I do have a favorite shot in the movie.

It's where Rory Calhoun shows up. He's also in the movie. He's a cowboy western star. He shows up at the general store, and he looks in the window. And the whole store's full of rabbits, but they all look like they're sitting around the table waiting for the waitress to show up.

They all kind of look over at him. It's a really weird shot. One's like smiling. Yeah, he's sitting there chilling out going, hey, where's the menu? Hey, have you seen the waitress again?

She never came back with my coffee. What the hell? It's a great shot. Well, they did kill the waitress. It's their own fault.

Why don't they just eat her? Well, they wanted. They seemed to kill a lot of people. They didn't eat anybody. Yeah, I know.

What's up with that? They're just angry. And, well, right off the bat, it was funny, because for some reason, because they became giant bunnies, I threw this out the window, but Marlene was sitting there going... Rabbits don't even eat people. Why the hell are they eating people?

They don't eat them, though. I'm curious about why they didn't show any bunny poop, because bunnies shit a lot. They do. All they do is poop. Why was there no bunny poop?

Why was there no boulder-sized bunny poop? If we were going to take it that realistically, then we should have also seen giant bunnies fucking all the time. Where was that shot at? They kept waiting for the cops to go, we need an air drop of carrots right away. You know?

We can lure them to the train tracks with carrots. Yeah, I was waiting for him to knock over a carrot truck or something. Because that one guy did have a produce truck. I was like, he should have opened the back. It was nothing but carrots.

No such luck. Oh, man. We get bunnies versus cows. We got that. Imagine that.

I'm like, seriously, they're official little bulls. They all have horns. Why don't they just gore the hell out of these bunnies and get it over with? I told you. Steer or dome, they don't know they have horns.

They just ran away. They were frightened. I'm just pissed off at this movie. I'm just having a hard time wanting to talk about it. I just want to forget I even watched it and be done with this movie.

Marlena said something before she left that they got the bunnies to run around by taking huge pots and pans and making lots of noise with them and scaring them. There was a lot of running, so I guess they were banging a lot of pots and pans. I can't imagine that no bunnies were hurt in the making. Of this film. How about the one on fire?

The one on fire, yeah. It was a stuffed animal. Jeez. No, it didn't look like a stuffed animal. It was obvious.

You thought that was a real rat? That was real. It was fucking. A stuffed animal. I'm sure that's what they type-painted it.

It's probably dragged around on a piece of line or something. It didn't look like a stuffed animal to me. No, it was really just a man in a bunny suit. Oh, yeah, it. Was a man in a bunny suit.

A man got hurt. Well, that's fine. As long as you don't hurt bunnies. Vito would not have liked this movie. Yeah, Vito would have had a field day with this movie.

Especially with bunnies. This is one of the few movies that, I mean, as ridiculous as it is and as much as we were like, groaning and making fun of it you'd still never in a horror movie would you also every once in a while get a aww yeah that was usually misty as much as you hated it come on every once in a while there were cute bunnies bunnies. Who doesn't I mean seriously bunnies are cute I wish I would have had more loppier bunnies because they're even cuter but you know whatever. But then it wouldn't have been scary It wasn't scary anyway. This was scary.

Come on. That's the thing. You're trying to make something that's completely not scary into something scary. What's next? Vampire Butterflies?

Three or four weeks ago, we watched Kingdom of the Spiders with William Shatner. But that was awesome. Technically, those two movies are very similar. That's what I was thinking. It is similar.

It picks up in this naturally scary. Spiders. There's Stuart Whitman, and then there's William Shatner. Obviously, a big difference there. But then there's the...

Tarantulas, the spiders, and bunnies. I mean, there's a huge difference. Most people have a belt in fear of spiders or snakes. Not rabbits? I don't know anybody that's afraid of rabbits except for maybe Emma Caulfield.

Who said that? She's probably not really afraid of him in real life. Oh, man. Yeah, but I was thinking that when I was watching it. I was like, this is plot-wise very similar to Kingdom of the Spiders.

They do the whole same time period. Animal attack movie. It's around the same time period. It's got a similar feel to it. Why is one movie so awesome and the other one so bad?

One of them's got Shatner in it and the other one doesn't. Not even that. I think it was pacing. Shatner in tight-ass pants. I think it was pacing.

I think that, you know, at least Kingdom of the Spiders kept it moving. It kept stuff kind of interesting. It didn't seem like it was going on for four hours. The last half of this movie just becomes this long, stretched out shot of bunnies running and then cut back to the people talking on the phone or bringing cars over. They're coming this way!

And then more bunnies. They're almost here! Underwater bunnies. There's really not a lot of scenes of people under siege of the bunnies or fighting against the bunnies. They're just on the radio somewhere talking about where they're going and then we cut the shots of them slow-mo scampering bunnies and that's all you get so that i think that's what really brings this one down as much as it's a ridiculous idea anyway that's what makes it different i think than kingdom of the spiders because they start off very similar it's a whole lot of down with ddt and messing with your ecosystem you know because it is a lot of it's about balance and they're just like that's the whole thing with the coyotes which we also brought up right as they brought this up Because he got rid of the coyotes on his land the year before, and now there's this, you.

Know, overpopulation of rabbits. Yeah, so, you know, we were just like... How could they do scorpions or snakes? Wait, how about squirrels? Squirrels?

When's the squirrels movie? Protect your nuts! Chipmunks would be even worse. Yes. Wait, that's the squeakle.

It's coming out. Hold on. Squirrels. That'd be the horror movie for my dogs. Mine would still go after them.

They don't care. I'm terrified of them. So, yeah, I think that was kind of, I don't know, that was the main difference there, but it does tap into that whole, you know, balance thing, and once you mess up your ecosystem, you know, everything else snowballs and goes out of whack, and it doesn't help when you start throwing hormones. into the mix and creating giant bunnies. And what was that? And bratty kids.

Oh, bratty kids. Well, there was a bratty kid in both of those movies. Actually, they never really bring that up, but it really is the little girl's fault at all. It is. Yep.

It is. Otherwise, they were, you know, keeping them control group, you know, trying to keep it from spreading out into the world. And look what happened. You let little brats get in there. Yeah, my kid had no business being in the laboratory.

What the hell's wrong with you people bringing kids to work? I don't bring my kid to work. You always take your daughter to work? Yeah. Yeah, we don't have that at my work.

You could catch yourself on fire. She would. Like a bunny. Ladies and gentlemen, reports from headquarters confirm that the horde of killer rabbits is getting closer to town. High voltage has been turned on into a section of the railroad tracks, and it is your car lights we hope will funnel the rabbits onto them.

There will be machine gun and rifle fire to both kill and divert these monsters. Do not panic. Is there anything less scary than bunnies? I know. That's kind of why it's like you almost have to give them credit.

How the fuck did this get made? Like, who greenlit this movie at MGM? Because killer bunnies. I was going to say puppies, but no. No.

Puppies can make puppies kind of scary. Yeah, puppies can tear into you. Bunnies? Come on. Yeah.

I can't think of any other animal on this planet that might be less scary than bunnies. I don't know, maybe killer dolphins? I don't know. Dolphins are kind of bastards, though. And they're smart.

They kill stuff just to play with it. I mean, really. Yeah. I think there is a movie about a guy that uses dolphins to plant bombs. Yes, it's a sci-fi.

Yeah, I can't remember what the name of it is. He put it on, like, bridges. I just saw it. I saw a thing on, I don't know if it was Discovery Channel or what it was, about dolphins that attack killer whales and stuff, and they. Couldn't believe that dolphins would actually get aggressive, but they do.

Yeah, they can. They can. They're smarter. They kill penguins just to play with their dead bodies. Well, who hasn't done that?

Penguins! Penguins are cute. Yeah, it'd be hard to do scary penguins because they're so funny. Meerkats. Well, they stand up.

I don't trust any animals. Yeah, meerkats. They got some shifty going on up there. I don't trust them. See, now monkeys are good because monkeys are cute, yet they can be scary.

They're not fucking cute. That's creepy. Either way, they're vicious. Those are so cute. Vicious monkeys.

Vicious. You don't mess with monkeys. Monkeys can kick your ass. Monkeys will beat your ass. And they'll throw a poop at you.

Or rip your arm off. They can do both. Maybe guinea pigs or something. Or hamsters. That was G-Force.

That was a horror movie in my mind. No, I used to have a vicious hamster. Don't trust hamsters. Those things are little bastards, too, little hamsters. They are.

No, that's true. Literally, bunnies are the least scariest animal on the planet. I think we've just resolved that. Pretty much. This movie just cements that.

Yes, it does. Oh, Lord. I don't know. The only other thing I could come up with on this is just that it's funny how the first shot we get in this is our main character shooting a horse. Yeah.

You didn't even check to see if its fucking leg was broken. Oh, it fell over. It fell over. Boom. He did briefly check.

He sort of touched it. I was just thinking, you know, in Black Sheep, they made the sheep look scary. Really, I was kind of scared. Even sheep. Yeah.

And that's another, you know, that's another Easter theme. Sheep are freaky looking. They are. They're freaky looking, especially when they're covered in blood. Even goats.

Yeah, but bunnies? No. You can't do it with bunnies. No, they're too fluffy. But yeah, right off the bat, we cool horse.

And then by the end of it, they're throwing out that line of survival of the fittest. Oh, well. So like, and by the end, I was like, we are, we're like battling these giant bunnies by the end. So it's like, is that what it's come down to? It's like manifest destiny bunny style.

Whoever can survive and, you know, completely take over the rest of the civilization. Hey, you win, you know, good luck. So if bunnies would have won, they would have taken over and they would have been walking around in like business suits and looking at their wristwatch all day. Sooner or later. Well, They weren't going to open the door.

Yeah, that's true. This is like the anti-PETA kind of movie. It's like, you know, they want to get you accustomed to shooting and killing and electric and burning the cutest animal possible, you know. That way, once they can get you past. That, you'll kill anything after that.

The question I had at the end of the movie, I don't know if it's a spoiler, but what the hell do you do with that many dead bunnies? Free coats for everyone. We listed some stuff off. Free coats for the whole town. Barbecue.

I've had rabbit before. Giant, lucky rabbit. My dad was a hunter, so when I was a kid, we used to have rabbit. I haven't had rabbit literally in 30-some years, probably. Does it taste like chicken?

No, actually, it doesn't taste like chicken. I still remember what it tastes like, but I can't really describe it. Is it gamey? Real gamey? If you mean gamey like I had deer one time, that was really gamey.

It's not gamey like that, or not the way I remember it, but it tastes different than chicken, though. It's pretty good. I've never eaten rabbit. I've had deer. I've had deer fixed properly.

We've got a lot of guys that. Are working hard. I've only had deer like one time, and the ones that I had was really gamey. Yeah. Well, we've got guys that bring like deer jerky, and they make deer sausage and stuff like that, and that stuff's really good.

Buffalo chili's awesome. Buffalo chili's really good. It's not about anything other than the movie. Yeah, obviously. Yeah.

I can tell you about my lion burger if we really want to go there. Lion burger? Yeah. He ain't lying. Oh, Jesus.

What? That's illegal, isn't it? I mean. I didn't kill it. I just ate the thing.

We're certain parts of Indiana. Yeah, once again. And you bitch about Indiana. In Indiana, lots of things are legal. That's why I moved there.

Yikes. I see you. I mean, we're not eating endangered species now, are we? This was a while ago. I don't know if they still have it over there, but yeah.

Is this like a lion burger? They had all types of game, and the only one that was on there that was not like a game animal was lion. I was like, I want that one. I was like, elk? Fuck elk.

Why don't you give me deer? No, I want lion, damn it. I want a predator, for fuck's sakes. The shock on Sean's face when he was. Like, what, bestiality is illegal?

What? That doesn't sound good at all. He was shocked. Poor biker. Like he was worried about something.

He was awful close to his dog. He was really close to his dog. Just a little too close. Well, alright. It's illegal.

Man, delete some of those tapes. It's not illegal if you're married, right? That makes it alright. He just seemed so shocked like this was a new concept. You thought his dog was his girlfriend for a while before he told you?

Yeah, early. I didn't know he was always talking about his girlfriend. I was like, yeah, I think his girlfriend's. Name is Pikers. He's like, no, dude, man, that's my dog.

And I was like, oh. Oh, dude. Got to get home to Pikers. Yeah. Wow, that's a far left turn, wasn't it?

Oh, man. She gets really scared when it's stormy outside. I got to get home. Your girlfriend's a wuss. I know.

All right. So, bunnies, we definitely want everyone to check out this movie. No, we don't. Unless I don't like you, then you. Can watch it.

There you go. Do you want to name people by name? No, there's just too many to name. Jeez. Oh, Lord.

It's quite an undertaking, I have to say. If you're into self-mutilation, check out this movie. I think the ridiculous of it is pretty fun for a while. It just goes on way too long. They needed to edit.

Out a lot of that. They had to edit it out two and a half hours of this movie. Yeah, it needed to be cut down to about a half an hour. The idea of watching this giant killer bunny movie is much better than actually watching it. Yeah, kind of.

I was. Now that I think about it, I go back and almost hope you wouldn't have found the movie sitting on top. Of the DVD player. The Lord doesn't want a waste of our time right there. It's right here.

We misplaced it and Brian had to spend like half an hour looking for it. You know, it's often true with really, really crazy B-movies where, you know, the title and the trailer is so great. Like something like From Hell It Came with the... the walking tree monster yeah that trailer and title and the monster are so much greater than having to sit through an hour and a half of the talky dialogue to get to that stuff you know and that's just always the case. I think that's usually what it's like if you go in with such a ridiculous idea and you're trying to make it work then that's all you're doing you're trying to grasp at straws and be like no really this is gonna be a great movie but i mean it's The difference is, like, movies that are, like, serious about it and don't try that hard to make it work, that you actually have something to work with.

And Killer Bunny's just not giving you anything to work. With on this one. Yeah, I think when they pitched this movie, they didn't tell them it was bunnies. Once again, much like the advertising campaign. You're like, let's just keep the producer snowed on this one.

Yeah, it's the Lepus. It's the Lepus. These Lepus monsters come. They're like, wow, Lepus, what is that? I think those are from Mexico.

Yeah, they come up here. The Chupalipus. Yeah, they come up here and they're going to attack people. Lepus, what is that? What is that?

Slavic? What's that, Slavic? That was last week. No. I don't understand what they're talking about.

These guys must be really smart. Greenlight the movie. Yeah, just give them a lot of money. Okay, not a lot of money. We don't have a lot of money.

Give them about 14 bucks. Oh, Lord. It would have been better. If they'd used lemurs. I like lemurs.

Night of the lemurs, yeah. Lemurs are awesome. They jump on you from the trees. They're like. They got big tails.

They choke you with their tails. See? I got a lot of zaboomafoo when she was little. Yeah, me too. Alright.

Alright, I think that wraps up Night of the Lepus. Definitely, go out and see it. Suckers. Have your own little Easter celebration with it. Get drunk, though.

I'm sure... With enough people in the room, it makes it more entertaining. Not these people, because they were angry. I don't have any beer, that's why. I guess.

Probably doesn't help sober, but I try not to intoxicate you people. If you're 12 years old and it's 1 in the morning and you're flipping channels. Yeah. You land on this crazy movie where the bunnies are jumping around eating people. I probably would have thought it was awesome.

Or if you're 38 and in your mom's basement with absolutely no life and nothing to do on a Saturday night. Hey, wait. I just moved. Shut up. Pull up with a big old tall can of King Cobra.

I don't want any King Cobra. All right, Colt 45 or Red Dog. Can I have a milkshake? A cost-cutter beer. Mom says I ain't supposed to drink in the basement.

Mama don't know. All right, we will take a break and be back with the rest of the show. A night of total terror. More shattering than your strangest nightmare. What caused the unnatural death, destruction, and panic?

I've got a theory. It could be bunnies. I've got a. Bunnies aren't as cute like everybody supposes. They got them happy legs and twitchy little noses.

And what's with all the carrots? What do they need. Such good eyes for anyway? And now, before the next show starts, let's enjoy an intermission. The smooth show of Cadbury Dairy Milk Chocolate.

And the irresistible, creamy, flowing yolk that will ultimately give them away. Don't get caught with it on your face. Cadbury Soup and Cadbury Gravy. Don't get caught. Now, the creators of Chicken Run are back with the pair that started it all, Wallace and Gromit.

Gromit, old pal, I'll need assistance. One's an inventor. Just a bit of harmless brain alteration, that's all. Who never says die. Full suction.

The other is his dog, who never says anything. They've made gadgets. They've made contraptions. And they've made a movie. From DreamWorks and Aardman Studios.

Get ready for action. Suspense. Mystery. And vegetables. I have the most terrible rabbit problem.

How on earth would they ever catch such a big rabbit? Wallace and Gromit. The Curse of the Were-Rabbit. Popsyndicate.com your one stop for all your unhealthy obsessions breaking news and in-depth reviews on all of your favorite. Movies music tv shows.

Podcasts comics books popsyndicate.com it's part of your problem you know you haven't seen enough movies all of life's riddles are answered in. The movies and now on with the. Show All right. We are back. And feedback.

And we're skipping it this week. We're skipping feedback. Well, I didn't see anything email wise and phone is between going back and forth to the new setup. It's sort of in the middle right now. So yeah, I'm just going to save it for the next time out.

So we'll be back with your feedback. So keep it coming. We're relocating the studio, but the phone number will still be the same. So three, six, five, five, five, six, five. Keep it on rolling on it.

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That's moviemeltdown.com. And while you're there, click on the forums link and go to our message boards at Pop Syndicate. Or go to popsyndicate.com and go to the forum sections and look. For Movie Meltdown. That's what I was talking about.

That was part of both of you doing your crazy things. Hers was being on the phone. All the time. What did I do that was crazy? I don't know.

Threatened Randy? I didn't threaten Randy that much. I was nice to Randy. He brought me cake. Let's do this.

That's true. He did bring me cake. Let's do this. All right. So we will move on into our confusing what the hell we're doing from here on out.

Oh. Okay, kids, get out your decoder bins. And. You're going to need them because we don't know what the hell we're doing. Take notes.

Are we underwater? What was that? Underwater bunnies are here. Oh, shit. Oh, my God.

That's when you knew they were going to attack. On dog, I see. They weren't even attacking. They were running. There was no attacking.

That's right. You knew that's when they would slather you with finger paint. All right, it is time for Movie Meltdown's Secret Circle reveal. The next, I don't know how many months. Three weeks?

For you members of the Secret Circle. This is entering into a confusing territory here. The quandary is that we usually record this show on Sunday, and next Sunday is Easter. So it's going to be hard for us to kind of probably really do a show. But.

At least on Sunday. There should still be one coming at you. I'm attempting to piece together one. I was actually discussing it yesterday. So in hopes that Rick and I can get together the next crazy Bigfoot outing, just go get yourself a copy of Sasquatch.

Yes. It's epic. I have a copy of Sasquatch. It is epic. Although there are several.

I was going to say the one with Lance Hendrickson, but he's in every movie of Sasquatch. I was actually with the 70s documentary, pseudo-documentary Sasquatch. No, we already did Boggy Creek. That's close enough. I like the Lance Henderson one.

I do, too. So, yeah, this one is the 2002 Lance Henderson, Andrea Roth, directed by Jonas Quastel. So you at least know you're watching the right one if you're going to get geared up for it. That's interesting. Which, again, there's already so many weird titles out there.

This one was known as The Untold. Like, if you look it up on IMDb, it's not Sasquatch. It's The Untold. I'm like, well. Why the hell?

Where did they get these weird... Why are they telling it? Yeah, I was like, why are you making a movie about it if you can't tell anything? Oh, so yeah, that will be possibly next week. She's going to love that one.

It's 90 minutes of people wandering around the woods with guns. I won't be there for that. Well, you're lucky, right? None for you. We're not doing it, because if it's a Sasquatch one, then it's just him and Rick.

Oh, yeah, that's right. It's not going to be us. You wanted the week off. You're worn out from bunnies, damn it. We've got a club meeting.

Oh, so in that time, we're probably... Originally, we were thinking we would check out Clash of the Titans, but it probably isn't going to happen for a full episode. So I'm sure some of us will go see it in the meantime and probably talk about it the week after that. Yeah, probably have to see it anyways. Probably, just because it's Clash of the Titans, for God's sake.

So I'm sure we will be discussing that on the Geek Activities the following week. For the week after that, I think we... Unless something falls through, we had it open to watch whatever the hell we wanted. So I think we may go with the Wraith. if you're on board for it. Yeah, I just have my new remastered widescreen version of the Wraith, so I'm pretty excited about it.

I don't know if I can wait that long to watch it, actually. That's up to you. Either way, we'll be back watching it the week after next. Either that or we're going to end up in one of those shows where we're like, oh, that was so cool at the time, it's just terrible now. This one has kind of cult appeal to it.

Yeah, it's always kind of stuck around. Everybody wants to be like, Remember the Wraith? Exactly. Every 10 years or so, somebody does that. I never could remember the name of the movie.

I think a lot of people did that. Remember that movie that had Charlie Sheen in it? I watched it. It was a fantastic interview with Quinn Howard, who's just awesome. And he says there are actually, like, Wraith fan clubs.

I believe that. And websites. I had never actually looked into anything like that. Yeah, it's one of those I can see it getting its own little weird underground following, so... If you're one of those people, hey, get all geared up.

If not, go get yourself a copy and join us for two weeks out on that one. Alright, anything else for this fun Easter-tastic extravaganza? I ate too much chocolate again. That's what always happens. Have a peep, you'll be fine.

Oh, fucking Christ. I'm gonna go home and watch Peter Cottontail. There you go. I'm gonna go home and watch a good movie. I'm gonna go home and swallow a pistol.

How can you get any better than Killer Bunnies? Here comes the Easter Bunny, too. I think Peter Cotton Tales is the one where they travel around all the holiday worlds, kind of like Nightmare Before Christmas. Yeah, they do. They go to Halloween and they go to President's Day or something like that.

That's not a real holiday. Well, you know. I'm thinking of the Tale of Peter Rabbit. There's too many of those. They all run together.

I was thinking of the Arthur Beatrix story. He used to be one of my favorites. There's Iron Tail, because Iron Tail is. Oh, I remember Iron Tail. And it's pretty awesome.

So if you want to watch a real holiday special, I recommend that one. I say yeah. It's a holiday special, and it requires a short bus and a helmet. Or that other bunny movie that we already watched, if you haven't watched it yet. Watership Down.

Watership Down. That is the most disturbing film. I can't watch it. No. I saw that as a kid because I really wanted to see it because it looked good.

And it's depressing as fuck. It's a harsh movie. That's a harsh bunny film. Go see that. I still have the...

It's like an illustrated novel of it. It was a hardback book that had just pages and pages of the animation. Pixels and stuff. Yeah. And...

Man, that movie disturbed me. So go watch that one. It's one of. Those required reading in high school that I somehow managed not to read. I never read that one either.

Well, I was a complete slacker in high school. I dodged all types of assignments and I just didn't go to school. And stuff like that. I don't know why your kid's so bad. I know why my kid's mad.

If you don't want to watch any of these movies, Critters 2 is a good choice. They actually have a great Easter scene in that movie where they're having an Easter egg hunt with the Easter bunny and all the eggs they painted are the Critter eggs and monsters start coming out and eating the Easter bunny and the kids and stuff. You can always watch the Twilight Zone movie because they have that really freaky bunny in that one clip in the remake of. It's a Very Good Life. That's right.

With that big freaky bunny. You don't remember? I kind of remember. There's Harvey. It's a good Easter movie.

Otherwise, I guess, yeah, go watch yourself some Easter stuff. And then, you know. Have some candy. Have some candy. Passion of the Christ if you're not really into the bunny thing.

We try not to get too religious on this show. Bunnies, that's as religious as we can. Bunnies and chocolate eggs. There you go. All you need.

Easter is for me. Otherwise, that about does it. We will return sometime. Some of us will return next week. Same geek time, same geek feed.

Thanks for listening. Thanks, guys. Peace. Whatever. Remember what my niece Lily said about Easter?

She's like, it's not all about the candy and the eggs. It's all about Jesus. That doesn't surprise me. She was five at the time. That doesn't surprise me.

She went skinny dipping in the baptismal one. Now that part's a little more, you know. You want a God to clean her. Oh, God. She's always going to be dirty.

Mr. Rabbit, Mr. Rabbit. Your coat is mighty great. Yes, bless God has made that way Every little soul must shine Every little soul must shine.

Mr. Rabbit, Mr. Rabbit Here's a mighty long Put on wrong Every little soul must shine Every little soul must. Shine Mr. Rabbit, Mr.

Rabbit Your ears are mighty thin. Yes, bless God They're splitting the wind. Heaven in a summer shine Heaven in a summer shine Heaven in a summer shine. Mr. Rabbit Mr.

Rabbit Your eyes are mighty red. Yes, yes, God, I'm almost dead. Rabbits aren't exactly Roy's bag. This show is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced and edited by Brian Renfro, featuring contact music performed by Tamara Deering. To help support the show, email producer at moviemeltdown.com for ways that you can contribute or advertise with us.