Justine Nelson - Unsung Cinema

Hey there, this is John Doe. You're listening to Movie Meltdown. Very glad to have you along. We have lots of exciting things to talk about. What's up, and welcome to Movie Meltdown's Unsung Cinema.

I'm Brian, and in this series, I welcome a guest to discuss their involvement in film. and then we round out the episode talking about a movie that they enjoy, but also feel maybe it's something that not enough people have seen. In this episode, I'm talking with Justine Nelson, an actor I was just recently introduced to when I saw the new movie Turn It Up from director Sam Scott. And I was really impressed with the movie, and it's a little unconventional at times, so Justine definitely has her work cut out for her on how to approach that role. So I wanted to find out more about her as an actor, and then we learn even more about her, and life in general, as we move into the discussion of her film choice, The Worst Person in the World.

So let's get to all that right now as we talk with Justine Nelson. Well, I didn't know too much ahead of time, so I'm actually going to start kind of really early on. I guess, where are you from originally? I'm originally from a suburb outside of Toronto, Ontario, Canada, called Hamilton. But I've lived in Toronto before. for like almost 15 years.

Okay and then as far as that far back when you were a kid what were you interested in? Was it the arts? Did you start that early with. Something theatrical or was it just sort of a general what were you into? Yeah well growing up I my mom tried me in everything.

I was an only child so she put a lot of her focus onto me trying to figure me. Out Were you okay with that? I didn't know any different. Now I'm like, God damn, it would be great to have a sibling to help me with aging parents. But yeah, so I tried everything, sports, which I was mildly interested in everything, but I didn't stick anything out really until I was in sixth grade, specifically when it switched.

My teacher told me I was a good actor. And I, for some reason, that stuck with me. And I was so excited about the compliment. I told my mom and she was like, well, let's try that. So she put me in camps and I was hooked.

That was the first thing that I stuck out. And then I was in acting classes and camps and I did a local theater production of the boxcar children when I was like 12. And then, you know, school plays, like not the, I didn't do the school musicals. We had plays, which were To me, I was like, oh, that's highbrow. Very fancy, yeah.

Well, mostly because I didn't get any parts in those musicals, which was devastating. But I typically leave that out, except apparently I just told you. Yeah, and then from that moment on, from about 12 onwards, I was very zone-focused on acting, yeah. What's funny is looking back when your teacher originally said that, did she mean it theatrically or was it like in class where you just like, you're like coming up with something very dramatic to get out of turning in this paper on time? Or was it actually like theater related?

That's funny. I mean, honestly, neither. I feel like it was somewhere in between. I was a really quiet, dorky kid at that age. And I think she sensed that I didn't have a lot of print we had just like in our growing up that district we had like just switched like grade six was a brand new school and I didn't know anybody and I had to do um like a class project and I guess I was acting certain things out to describe things I can't even remember what the project was but it was like after she told me after this little project thing and it wasn't even I don't think it was particularly supposed to be theatrical um and I was just so desperate for compliments I think at that age I I just really zoned in on it and I was like oh Wonderful.

Well, let's take that. I doubt she even meant it. It was just like a passing comment that I've still remembered all these years later. Nope. You said it.

No take backs. Yeah. No take backs. Yep. Yeah.

I was that weird dorky kid. And I don't even think I got that sort of encouragement. And I think back now, I was like, you know, this is why it took so long to find anything like i question a lot of my uh teaching over the years i'm like these schools they were not helping me at all. Yeah i had like dyslexia growing up and stuff too and teachers were mean about it like no one thought like i wonder like i remember once a teacher in front of everybody told me that i don't read very well and like when i when i had to read out front like you know out loud and i was mortified so probably why i was so excited when someone said something nice yeah, maybe, maybe teaching. Is not for you.

This is sometimes I'm like, if you don't work well with, you know, other people or children, like maybe this is the wrong career for you. But I guess that at that point you said you were kind of all in. So was it just theatrical from that point or when did you start sort of taking into account, Oh, I can go out and look for, you know, like professional type jobs. Um, Well, I knew, I think from like a point of high school that I didn't want to be at that time. I didn't want to be a theater actor, but there wasn't really any other options in my town.

And it didn't occur to me that I could go do auditions young. So I thought like once I'm done school, I want to go. I was like, I'm going to move to L.A. and I'm going to be like a movie star, like film and TV. And then my mom at the time, she she said no. And back then I had to follow the rules.

But she said I had to go to school first. So we found a school that was specifically training for film and TV so I could start doing that training in that medium rather than theater. So I did that for two years and then I moved to Toronto instead of L.A. because after being at school, there was a few connections and I thought, OK, I got to take advantage of this. So I moved to what was the big city, what I thought. And when I was about 20 years old, I moved there.

And I'm still there. I was going to say, depending on the timing, I mean, a lot of projects were moving to Canada. So I guess it depends on where and when, but it's not unheard of, you know, moving to Canada and actually getting a decent amount of work. Yeah. I mean, it does seem like it's a trajectory, like you sort of have to do, like you have to, you know, get some buzz in Toronto and then you get to, or Vancouver to be able to apply for a visa.

Yeah. for the States. And I, unfortunately that's just been a very long, arduous process that I didn't know back then. I thought, well, I'll just do this real quick and then pop over there. And I'm still there. I mean, I come over to, I'm like, I'm in New York right now, but, but I still, I work in Canada.

Yeah. Well, and then as far as getting into the industry, like that is one of those things that's continually changing. I mean, how, how different, even from when you started, does it seem like things are just trying to get basic, you know, jobs at this point? Gosh, I mean, everyone's situation is different. I mean, mine, it has not been easy.

From the start, it hasn't. And it's sort of stayed that way. But I don't know why, just like certainly, I mean, I'd still, we don't produce as much stuff in Canada. And that's frustrating. I wish we had like more funding bodies and things like that, like America does.

But We also have a much smaller population. I think our population in its entirety is the same as California. Yeah. So I guess it makes sense. But yeah, when I first moved to Toronto, I was very, what's changed mostly is myself.

I would say I was just very confident, ignorantly so. I just thought it was going to happen really fast. And I had a really fruitful or college career where I thought that, because like we did, I was in a film school and they did films and, I was cast all the time and the projects in college. So I was like, Oh, this is going to be a piece of cake. And it was not, and it's still not, but it's slowly changing for me.

Like I'm getting a bit more now, but it was, yeah, it's, it's tough. I would say like, I think across the board, Canadians find it quite hard. Yeah. Yeah. Well, and then I guess as far as just personal taste from when you were growing up and then moving forward, what type of movies were you drawn to?

Or were TV shows. More of a focus early on? Or which were you kind of drawn to just as far as a viewer? I think films. And I wouldn't say my taste has kind of stayed the same.

It's just like as movies have evolved, like my taste has evolved with it. I've always liked more indie-ish type of films like nothing like like like not like i only watch small art house movies but um i do things like. I remember when i was like 17 or 18 or maybe a little older my favorite movie was like crazy have you seen that from drake darmus no i. Do know the title but i don't think i've watched it it's. Great he filmed it on like a canon camera like something, I forget which model.

And it's just like, a lot of it was improv and I just absolutely loved that movie. And I still do. Like, I, I, I still think I was talking about it recently with a friend. Um, so I still love films that are a little bit like quieter, maybe slice of life type of dramas. I like, I've always leaned towards those and that hasn't changed yeah.

I feel like I'm back and forth like I I use I use the mainstream super big budget stuff when I need to because sometimes it is more of the escapism part of it that that you need like just to kind of keep your brain okay. Because a lot of that's what I find. It's like I will hit those like indie dramas and I am all in and I am sucked in. But sometimes it's so much like because they're usually really heavy. And I'm just like, sometimes I might want to break from that.

And I'll just, you know, watch some cheesy horror and have fun with that. Yeah, for me, I'll watch Hacks. I'll just I'm rewatching it because I'm devastated that it's over. That's how I get my little breather. from all the misery and the movies that I watch. Cause I, I do love a heartbreaking film.

I just love it. I don't know what's wrong with me. Um, I get it. Yeah. Those are my go-to like for what I really get into.

Like I, it's one of those and I usually can't even like recommend those to other people because normal people don't get into that on that level or I'm way more. Attached to those type of movies than others. Um, So yeah, it's, it's finding the right time to be like, no, this is my movie, but it's usually just me. Well, and then looking at the, the only other thing I'd seen, you know, that you were kind of interested in was photography. Are you, are you all in on that or is that just sort of a thing that you like to do sometimes or.

Just a thing I like to do sometimes. Well, it's, I would say my side hustle out of necessity. It was a hobby and, for many years in my twenties. And then it was maybe during the, right after the pandemic, I decided I shouldn't, I could no longer waitress. My feet hurt too much.

I couldn't do it. And my temperament and my demeanor was being affected. I started that way. I was like, no, this is definitely not a thing that I need to do. Oh, I mean, I did it for way too long for myself.

Some people are so amazing at it. I was never that amazing. I don't know how I did it for as long as I did being not. Good at it. Like I would just laugh.

Like I don't know anything about wines. I like to drink them. But when people would ask me questions, I would just pull it out of my ass. This one's red. Yeah.

And they go, is it dry? And I always said yes, because I learned that no one wants to hear otherwise. If it's not dry, they don't want it. So I just say yes, yes. But yeah, so then photography sort of, I fell into it being my Joe job by word of mouth and people seeing that I had a camera and I was waitressing at a restaurant and then during the pandemic, everything closed down.

So I started helping the owners with their social media. And then that sort of became a full-time gig with them. And then other people heard that I did that. And then I sort of, it started off as like, I would take portraits of my actor friends and I really enjoyed that. It was like an artistic expression, but then it morphed into, I do a lot of food photography and event photography and it's soul crushing, but bills when acting does not, which unfortunately is often.

You do what you gotta do. I do what I gotta do. And it's definitely sucked the joy out of photography a little bit, but I thankfully acting is picking up a little bit more now. So I'm hoping that in the future I can enjoy photography a bit more and being able to just do it like the things I want to do with it. There's several times I've, I've, gone in more than others on photography there was a very early stage when it was one of those where it was very traditionally artsy and trying to do something more you know specific along those lines and thinking oh maybe i can get a job in this area and none of that really panned out so then i had another wave recently that was just weird and like it was just it's mostly inanimate objects because i don't you know interact with humans but So I realized like all of my photography is just inanimate objects.

So then I just went with it. I'm like, all right. So then it became about framing and weird angles and like just finding cool stuff that I liked and no one else cared. So I enjoy it for that reason. But yeah, you cannot make a living doing weird stuff that only you like.

I know. But I'm glad you have that. That's great. If you found what you like to take pictures of, it's because keep that because when you lose that, yeah, because I've sort of lost a little bit of the joy. um, in it, but you know, it is what it is. We do what we got to do.

Yeah. Well, I guess moving into your recent movie, I mean, you just had the premiere of turn it up. Was that where you're at as of right now? Yes. Yes.

We did our premiere on the fourth and we had another screening last night and I believe there's another one tomorrow. So that I was, really like i didn't know again based on description so if people don't know they'll probably be kind of concerned when they read it too like wait what is this movie i was really impressed with what it was and and was not sure where it was going until i got there i was like oh no this is totally different and it's really that's what i responded to is how different it is oh yeah yeah i watched it and and they they sent the the link for it and it was amazing and Yeah, so I was thrilled with it. How were you introduced to that project? Yeah, I was very lucky. Gwen, who plays Court in the movie, I've known her for, honestly, probably a decade now, which is wild.

That is crazy to think about. But her partner, Sam, is the director and the writer. They co-wrote it. But while they were writing it, it was originally the part of AC was written as a man. And then I think it was Gwen that proposed the idea that maybe AC could be a woman.

And Sam liked that idea. She threw my name into the mix. And he said from that moment on, he sort of started to imagine me as the role. But then they had to talk to the producing team. And that was a bit more of a...

They had to convince them a bit more because I think they were quite attached to the idea of it being a male character. Yeah. Was there... Because there's already. not a massive one, but kind of an underlying romantic angle going on there. Was that in the original one with it being a man?

Yeah, I think so. So it would change it to be more of a queer love story, which I think that's such a, that changes things. But, but that's what I like so much about it was it's not about that. Like it's just going on and it's so matter of fact, the way that it is in life. So I was just like, as we got into this, I was like, well, obviously, you know, she's into her and like, so, but it doesn't ever stop and go, Hey, just so you guys know, this is what's good.

It's like, it's just part of the story. And yeah, it's like, it's, it's, I love that aspect of it. Cool. Yeah. Same.

So do I. Um, so yeah, I, they had me audition and so they could see, you know, some guys audition for the part and I got to be one of the girls that auditioned. And then thankfully the, I, they liked my audition and then they agreed and cast me. So I, I had a bit of insight into it because I had talked to Gwen. So it maybe helped me with my audition a little bit, having a bit of a chat beforehand.

Yeah. And it's an unusual premise. So I guess, what did you think about the concept as a whole? Yeah, it was really cool. Unlike anything I had read or done, this was my first horror film and horror project.

So I was really excited to be able to do that. But it was interesting because I could tell the character that I was going for was sort of... a grounding presence. Like I didn't have to really stretch too much into being part of that like horror element. So it would be, I thought it'd be cool to be like a human being with all of these crazy things happening around. Yeah.

The horror sort of finds you and just sort. Of envelops the whole movie more or less. Exactly. So I was, yeah, I was really excited. I was really crossing my fingers and toes that the producers would agree with Sam and Gwen that, I could perhaps play the role and that happened.

And I'm so grateful. Well, and it's very music oriented. Do you play music on some level? Well, you know, maybe a little, I could, if I, someone handed me a guitar, I could play a couple of chords together, which I'm proud of. Had I ever played the bass?

Not once. So thankfully we had about a month leading up to shooting and they provided me with a bass to practice on and, I had the song, so I spent a month learning that one riff over and over and over again. For the few shots of you seeing my hands, I'm like, those are my hands. I practiced for a month. So that's my music history.

Just one month of bass and then, you know, a little guitar. Well, especially with that song, it's a very specific song and a very specific groove that you get into. So once you got that down, you're good. Yeah. It looks like I played, right?

Yeah. And also for being, you know, sort of horror and about a band, but it's also definitely got a. Very comedic tone to it. Was that something that the other actors and the director, were you all sort of discussing that balance of what, you know, it's horror here, it's drama here, it's kind of still comedy, like figuring that out? You know what, I think it just sort of flowed naturally.

You could just tell by reading the script where where the jokes were and where the moments were and by nature of like who was cast it just happened so naturally um like the the agents like chris sadika's like he's a comedian and he's just phenomenally funny like i feel like you can give him anything and you know it's going to be comedic because he's just a genius And then John Craig, who plays Berg, he is also just like so naturally funny. So anything with him in it and the moments that he got to sort of riff and improvise were just like you just could tell on set where they were going to be. And then they were even funnier put together, which was so much fun to watch. And there's some definite weird gore things going on.

How much of that practical were you involved with? And then there's a lot of trippy visuals. How much of that was sort of after the fact added in? I guess, you know, while you were on the set, how were you balancing all of those things? Yeah, so everything was practical effects, which was really cool.

And Jonathan Craig, who plays Berg, he doubled as our special effects and makeup effects he that's his side that's his main job actually so he did all of that so he had two hats to wear and it was so cool like i got to see most of it like the exploding head we all got to be on set for that like the big one where sarah's head explodes that was such a cool day um and then my up close um stuff i was the most close with was the goo like i got to there's a lot of goo yeah I just got, you know, I would have it on my finger from time to time coming out of my ear. So yeah, I got to, and then certain scenes that I wasn't a part of because I got to work with Jonathan quite a bit. Like I would see, he would show me things, like he would bring things and like show the cast and be like, this is going to be in the scene tomorrow.

So things I wasn't there for physically, I got like sneak peeks at. And we got to see his studio, which was really cool. I assumed that was, yeah, something that they had been doing because it looks like the practical effects look, so good and it looks like somebody who loves practical effects is working on this movie so. And that was so fun that's what they wanted they wanted it to look like that like so to add to the camp and everything too which was a lot of fun. Yeah that's what i was wondering on the on sam your director was he like is this kind of the direction he wants to go in you know from what you can tell as far as what he's doing or is this just a crazy one-off.

Id yeah You know what? That's a great question that I'll ask him when I see tomorrow. I don't know. I don't know if this is like the, like the types, like if he always wants to make horror, I feel like I would be guessing though. I mean, I feel like he's got such a expansive mind that he'll probably want to do multiple genres, but he does this genre so well.

And he, he, he's a musician as well. So I think naturally the music element came so natural to him and maybe that'll be a through line in his movies. That would be a, I guess from, you know, being a peer of his, cause he loves that. And he's been in bands like since he was young and I believe he went to school for music. Don't quote me on that.

I'll ask him tomorrow. But yeah, he's really close with the band Ace of Wands who did all the music in, in the film and all the bass that you hear from me, sadly is not, the audio is not me. And it's the band Ace of Wands. Whatever works, it all sounds good. But the, the hands, that was me.

And on set, I did, I did make the sounds. Well, that's, I mean, again, just the overall vibe to, to let people know and to help them seek it out because it's not, it's not a conventional movie, but that was what was, what was so sort of like overwhelming in a good way to me. Cause I got into it and Not tonally, like, cause this could almost be a backhanded compliment. I got a very street trash vibe, which I don't know if you're familiar with, but it's like, it's sort of legendary cult film. And like, I have issues with that as an overall movie, but what's so amazing about that movie is it just doesn't care.

Like it, it knows what it wants to be. And it has this weird, sometimes gross. Story to tell. And it like, doesn't care. Like it is just awful. off on its own.

We're going to tell you this story. We don't care if the audience likes it or not. This is it. And like, I got that sort of vibe as I'm into this. I'm like, this is like a weird, almost that same era of like, especially once you work in the animation, it's got sort of that heavy metal vibe and that like Ralph Baschke kind of stuff from, from that same era.

That's like unconventional and doing things sort of different than your traditional movie. And also not trying to fit into any of those molds, like not caring if anybody likes this or not, this is what we're making. And like, that's what I responded to so much from it. Yeah, great. I mean, that sounds like very on point with what our director, Sam, like how he describes it when he talks about it as well.

Like he said that he wanted it to feel like, yeah, like we didn't take ourselves too seriously. Like even sometimes the character's like are in on the like absurdity of like, this is ridiculous. And like, he liked the fact that like sometimes that like the characters in the movie didn't even know what the hell was going on. And, and just going along with like the plot being like, what? Like, and he, he liked, He liked that element of it.

It seemed like that's what he was going for. I think you need that in those type of movies. You kind of need the audience to feel like your main character, which is like, we would be in shock if this happened. So this person on screen probably should kind of be in shock as well. He was saying yesterday, even like there's the part at the end where one of the agents says, don't do it again.

And he's like, I don't think they could if they tried. I don't think they even knew what they did. Like, and he, he liked that, like throughout, like we're involved in all of a sudden we're in this mess and we have no idea what it is. Like there's a grander thing going on, but we have no idea. You're swept up in it so far that it could be taking people out along the way.

And yet you don't even know what's going on. Well, does it have a distribution deal? Do we know where it's going to go? I don't think we know yet. I think that is the goal of this, um, this round, this trip, this, this festival.

So yeah, I don't have an answer to where it's going to end up just yet, but hopefully soon. Yeah. So definitely I will find out and help put the word out. Cause it is something people need to seek out. It is very interesting and different and impressive.

So yeah. Yeah. Well, if you want, we also just sort of the other half of the show is just, discussing a movie that you're also a fan of. So if we want to change gears into that, I'll do the rundown here. Yep.

Our Unsung Cinema feature is The Worst Person in the World. The year is 2021. The director, and I'm notorious for butchering people's names, so let me attempt Joachim Trier. Is that how he says it? I think it's Joachim.

I could be wrong. I'm lucky to get, you know, your basic American name, so I'm not sure, but amazing regardless and they plot according to imdb the chronicles of four years in the life of julie a young woman who navigates the troubled waters of her love life and struggles to find her career path leading her to take a realistic look at who she really is so spoiler alert we're gonna ruin the hell out of this so you're supposed to go watch it you should go watch it it's amazing so As we get into it, usually my first question for the guest is why this movie? Like if, you know, we're throwing it out there, you know, what movie you want to talk about? What sort of led you to this movie? Yeah, I watched it only recently, a few months ago, or maybe two months ago for the first time.

And I had heard so much about it. And I was in an acting class and I was doing a scene from Sentimental Value. So I had watched, and I had seen that in theaters, and that's Joachim's film as well that came out this year. And I was just so, like, I feel so in love with Renata Reinsven, who is the lead actress. Oh, yeah.

So I thought, like, okay, it's time to finally watch Worst Person in the World. I just had been waiting because it wasn't on any of the obvious platforms, like the ones that I had, so I thought it out. And why I've chosen it is because It's the first film I've watched in a long time that I was absolutely completely engrossed. And I, my mind was so focused on it. I have ADHD, so that's difficult.

Like my mind will wander, you know, today's day and age, you accidentally pick up your phone and you go, what am I picking my phone up for? I'm watching a movie. I just sat there and watched it. And like, I don't even know if I blinked. Like I, and I, and I haven't felt that in so long.

And like, I have a lot of films I like that I could have chosen, but I chose this because it's the most recent film that's made me feel that way. And it was intoxicating. And yeah. I definitely agree. Like, yeah, I knew of it.

And that's kind of why I was like, it was almost like the universe coming together because I knew of it. And then I. Swear the day before, I just heard somebody go into mentioning it and was talking about it. And I, in my head was like, I really need to watch that. And then the, you know, the word came through of what you're paying.

I was like, oh, I really do. Okay. This is, this is what I need to do. And like, I'm glad it led me here because it, it is one of those. I'm, I'm just like, you have to be kind of enthralled with what's going on. but the other thing that's so amazing to me is like again from a almost a screenwriting standpoint of like sometimes people are working so hard to come up with something new and different and some weird take on something that you've never seen before and I'm like this is the most regular life ever And it's so relatable and it's so engrossing.

And like, it's, sometimes I'm like, you don't really have to reinvent the wheel. Like all you have to do is find an interesting story to tell and tell it. And it's simpler than we make it sometimes. Yeah, I couldn't agree more. I feel like that's another reason why I really liked it.

It was really like a slice of life. It was just about a person's romantic life. Like that's all you really see. Like this, like obviously she has a life outside of that, but this is through the lens of like, the chapters of her romantic life. And I, I think it goes to show that it's like, yeah, casting like the, the chemistry between the actors was so beautiful.

Like they're just like, it's so rare. I don't know. I loved it. There was like, didn't leave much of the imagination. I really believed these people and, and you can really just completely dive in and believe it.

Yeah. I mean, it, it's just those, and it is interesting that it breaks it up into chapters because it is just sort of this ongoing thing that is our life. And it tries to like give them a specific arc in and of themselves. But I'm just like, this is. Just what we do.

Like, it's just, it's so. Like, it, it doesn't even like, there's not even like a hard dividing line. Like sometimes they just bleed into the next one. Anyway with the story because that's how life works. And like, that's what we do.

Do we just go from one day to the next and things happen and you deal with them and that's what she's doing yeah. And i really liked how they're not it's not always so literal like there's chapters that are her imagination or how she's interpreting the everyday life her everyday life not necessarily just it's not all so literal whereas like a film like that where it's so grounded it was so unique to have these like fantastical elements in it as well where like the scene where the chapter where she pauses the world and she goes running down the street, which I think made it into being the poster to find her love interest at the coffee shop, which like, and then there's the, the scene, the chapter where she's done mushrooms and like all of these.

Yeah. I just, I just, I loved that too. So you're really like experiencing what she experiences was so cool. And that's real life too. Cause we do that.

Yeah. Those, those two are definitely the most like, artistic moments of like, Whoa, let's, let's, you know, just take a minute and do something, you know, a little outside the norm, but so much of the rest of it is very matter of fact, day-to-day stuff that, yeah, it's interesting when it takes that turn. Yeah. Um, and it's so interesting. I, I, um, why I was drawn to those scenes.

Like, I mean, there's so many, like my favorite chapter is a different one, but what I found so interesting or why I personally connected to the fantastical ones is I, I made a series, um, back in Canada called Mindfudge. And that's sort of the, like that's the theme of our show too. It's like taking everyday life things and you're seeing the imagination, her imagination play out. And that happened in this film, which I thought was really interesting. And so cool.

I was like, well, that's how I experienced life too. And I made a whole show about it. And you're on mushrooms right now. See, so many things in common. But yeah, my favorite chapter, oh gosh, which one was it?

It's the one where she's at the party. And she meets the other gentleman whose character's name I'm forgetting. Crashes the wedding. Yeah. Cause at first I was like, I thought it was just like having a party and the door was open and she just wandered in.

But then later I'm like, no, this is a wedding. She just crashed the reception. I just thought it was so like, that could have been like a short film on its own, like a standalone. Cause the chemistry between them was so palpable and just so exciting and delicious to watch that I, I watched it so many times over and over. I just like, couldn't believe the chemistry between two of the two of them of these like actors.

Like I didn't know before. I mean, I know Renato Reinsman now, but the other actor I'd never seen, but I was like so invested as if I knew them. Like, you know, when you like, you know, we're drawn to things sometimes that we're more familiar with and I had never seen him before. And I just, I was so, I absolutely loved that, that part of it. Yeah.

And I think again, so much of it, you know, plays into relationship stuff and this was something that the one thing I'll say that is sort of different specifically in that scene is because we I didn't as we got into even the title I was like I don't like this cheating angle like I I don't know I I've always had issues with that going on and obviously they do too when they get into it because you see them like figuring out like what what is going too far like how much of an interaction with someone that I'm attracted to can I have when it's still just okay. And then where have we crossed the line here? And they, I feel like they crossed the line pretty early on, but the. Whole thing is a line crossed.

Like, and that's what's so interesting is that like, they're doing this like very immoral thing that I think most of us would have. We, we find it icky and uncomfortable to, to watch and to, to think about ourselves or our partners doing these things. But yet in this chapter, it feels so, I don't know. I couldn't turn away. And I just like, I cared about them.

And while they're doing this horrible thing, it's such a unique thing that the director did, like somehow made them likable while doing this extremely unlikable thing. Well, and again, it is a relatable moment. Like it's so rare that I've had functional relationships in my life, period. But there was one, like one of the few times, like I'd found myself in a relationship and I wasn't used to that in and of itself. And then I do remember a specific moment of like meeting someone.

And I was like, oh. This there's kind of like a moment here. And I'm like, in a different time in my life, this would be different. I would take this different. I would want to follow this, but I can't.

And I kind of don't want to, but at the same time, it's a weird moment that you don't want to miss. And you don't, you know, you don't get those very often in your life. So like it was capturing a thing that we find ourselves into in the middle of sometimes. And it's, it's an interesting moment because it's so, but yet it's skating that edge of like, okay, this isn't cool once you cross this line and they very quickly start to cross that line. Oh yes.

They like, I guess it's like, it's like something actualized. I'm sure a lot of people have experienced, like you just said, and then you just, it's unfolding in this film in front of you. Yeah. I don't know. I just thought it was so entranced.

Like I was just so entranced in that, in that moment. I don't know why I just couldn't look away. I just, and it was mostly their chemistry. And it was like, helped me turn a blind eye to what they were doing. I was just like, well, how can you deny their chemistry?

That, that whole scene is amazing. The thing that I like very early on, and it's mostly, I guess her performance is what sells it is like, there's a moment because we see her like the beginning and it's almost a little more just sort of montage of her. Like being in school, not knowing what she wants to do. Like, and so she gets to the point where she meets the first guy and like they're moving in together. And there's that moment when she's putting stuff on the shelves and it just sort of like she stops and looks at things.

And there's this moment of happiness that she conveys so well. And I'm just like, I'm watching it going, have I ever had that moment? Like she's delivering something that's so amazing that I'm like, do I even have this in real life? And that's what I took away from this movie. It's so immersive that it makes you question all of these questions of yourself.

Yeah. Yeah. And I just think I'll watch anything she's in now from here on out. And I think she does that so beautifully. She's just such a delicious actress and being able to like convey those nuances and like, yeah, so much so that it provokes that feeling in you and I'm sure in everyone.

I don't know. Like there was so many things that she portrayed in this film that were so like tiny and like specific. And I, I just, they made it, it's so relatable because the more specific you get, it's just so much more relatable. You'll just see, you'll see yourself in the emotion she's portraying in her eyes. I just, yeah, I, I just love watching her.

And falling into the same traps that kind of everybody does. Like it, all of the the games that come into play in a relationship and there's there's more functional than a lot really like the the one that we see sort of falling apart and like just watching her like feeling like she's bored in her relationship and it's like well but that's a good portion of it like dealing with that is a huge portion of being in a relationship and I think he tries to explain that. And if you're not in that place, you know, you can't convince somebody of that. You can't make it happen. It either has to be working or it doesn't.

And like, it's, it's interesting watching her kind of do stuff that you're like, you, you want to help. You want to be like, no, here's the thing. But you know, you're, you're just, you're watching it. You're immersed in it. Yeah.

And I could be getting the line wrong, but there's like a moment where I think she says like, I, I love you, but I don't love you. Or like, I don't love you. Like, and it's just so. Yeah. So painful, because it's like, to be on the receiving end of that and have to say that to somebody, because like, I'm sure that is universal, too, because we don't always have language for specific things.

And that kind of conveys like, such as like a nuanced feeling of like, I love you, but I don't love you. Like, oh. my God. Horrible. I mean, that is I'm assuming at least towards the end of every relationship. Right.

It's like you wouldn't have been there if you didn't love them. But like you wouldn't be leaving if you weren't out of love with them to some extent. Right. And I feel like if it's a real relationship, part of that's always going to be there. And I, and I seen that in people that like, even, you know, people are divorced, but like years later, like, you know, especially once kids get involved, it's like, you're still a family.

Like you can be divorced, you can be far from a relationship, but they're going to be in your lives and you have to deal with them. And like, there's always going to be this baseline of, of love that is still going to be there from when you started this relationship that, That's, that's just, again, so much of that comes through in this story. It's, it's so impressive. Yeah. And it's such a complicated one for, for that relationship with the two of them, because like nothing, he didn't like nothing happened to make her like fall out of love with him.

It was just like the natural progression of things, which is like so devastating when someone, you just like fall out of love with somebody. But obviously, like you said, yeah, there's a, for them, there was still love there, which comes back later in a very like heartbreaking. Yeah. Yeah. And that's that's maybe the impressive thing, too, with trying to balance that relationship, because I feel like a lesser film would make him a bad guy.

You know, it would be like, oh, he's a terrible person or he did this. And I'm like, he's abrasive, certainly. And he's got his opinions on things. So there's times when you don't love him. But at the same time, I'm like, he never does anything bad to her.

He's always kind of there and wants to continue a relationship. So it's interesting that like, yeah, but sometimes that just doesn't happen. Sometimes it doesn't work out. So it doesn't take the easy road of like, and then he's a horrible person. So she has to leave.

It's like, no, she doesn't have to, but she wants to. And that's kind of the key, you know? Yeah. And it's devastating. Like his story is so sad.

Like there's no like happy ending for him. And that also- kind of his life. Like there's not always a happy ending, which we all hope there is. And maybe you can find moments of it and wait the way to reframe your view on the world. But just, you know, very matter of factly, like his story was, he was left by what he considered the love of his life.

And then you find out that he had held onto it for all of those years and then he gets sick and that's so devastating. And, And then she, she's, she kind of, she reenters his life a little bit, but probably not in the way that he would love for the end of life. And not in a romantic way, just almost friendship at that point of like, we've spent so much time together. That, you know, I I'm saying goodbye, whether I want to or not. Yeah.

Um, yeah. And I, and I love how she's not perfect and she's not meant to be perfect. Hence the title. Um, but like, obviously she's not the worst person in the world, but what I liked, I was watching an interview. And he said there was like a scene that was cut where she's looking at herself in the mirror and she's, and it's, I think probably was one of those like fantastical elements where she's saying to herself, you're the worst person in the world.

And her reflection is agreeing with her. Yeah. And that's, I just think so universal that we have moments of like just thinking the worst of ourselves. And, and if there's no, like, you know, you're, you're going to agree with yourself. You're, you know, you're going to look for things that confirm that for you. especially like, and that was just, so I wish I had seen that scene, but even hearing him, I think I really liked hearing, and that's how he came up with the title.

And I think that this film isn't meant to be also so literal too. It feels like her interpretation of herself. Yeah. When there's so many other aspects that come into play, because even from the very beginning, it talks about our like technical distractions and there's several moments along the way that they're mentioning us being distracted by screens and stuff like that. But at the same time, I feel like what's, as he got to this towards the end, when he's already sick, he's having what is one of his most impressive scenes.

And he goes into the, that whole talking about stuff. And I've, I've had, we, one. Of the episodes recently, I, one of the co-hosts, we went into this thing because we're both, you know, movie geeks and like physical media is what, you know, so much of our lives have been about. And then his line is like, I grew up in a time when culture was passed along through objects and they were interesting because we could live among them and we could pick them up and hold them. And like that, that hit home so much because I've had so much of that thought lately of like.

I've got so much stuff, which some people would say is a problem. But at the same time, I'm like, but it's, it is like kind of who we are. Like I, and that's something that may be changing with generations, but I feel like so much of what we are is what we surround ourselves with, you know? And it's like, it is, it is a representation of our taste and our history. And like, so much of it is like around us all day long.

So I don't know, just listening to him talk about that. I was like, this is something I've gone through my whole life of like, these are the things that are important to me. And that's why I surround myself with them. It must be so hard for younger generations because they have access to everything in their device. They can feel like they have all of these options and they know about all this stuff, but it's just in this tiny little rectangle in their hand.

See, that's what I know we questioned when we were having that discussion a couple of months back. It's like, do they feel things differently, kids now? Because... it was so hard to get things. Like he said, he was like going through record shops to find an album or find an old comic. And like, you had to physically like seek it out to get this.

So when you got it, it made it a little more important to you. So when everything is available to kids, like, do they appreciate it the same way? Do they have that like attachment to things the same way? There's gotta be a difference. Like there's no way it's like, Oh yeah, I can order that on Amazon and I get it tomorrow.

And it's like annoying if it says it's going to take two days. Yeah. Whereas like, yeah, when I was younger, I got really into collecting Joan Jett records, but I'd have to like go far places to get them. And I'd find one and I'd be like thrilled. Like, cause now I could, yeah, I could just like find it online.

Yeah. I mean, it meant something because you spent so much time getting it versus just typing it in your phone. Yeah. And it'd be so exciting to go. You're like, oh my God, I'm going to go to this place and have this experience instead of just like sitting on my phone and having no experience to get like that's a whole experience yes having the thing is an experience but the like you get to go on a journey to get something like these like micro journeys um that they're not doing as much because everything comes to them and to us because it's obviously i'm taking part in it because it's a habit and it's so much easier now but yeah you made me think about it more it's it's really sad and it's definitely doesn't feel the same Like the feeling I get as a kid going to a store and getting a magazine rather than like scrolling on my phone is so different.

And, but now we're so accustomed to this way of life. I want to try to reverse it somehow, but it's so hard. Yeah. I mean, again, I, it's becoming hoarding at this point, but like I am also the way I don't care, but then it led to another, then this was something I actually had this conversation with someone because a lot of it is so personal as well. And I was talking to an actor and they like, they were talking about, you know, signing eight by tens and stuff.

And I'm like, yeah, I have so many. And I'm like, they're all made out to me. What happens when I'm not here? And that's kind of what he's going through. It's like so much of what he cared about were these physical things that he surrounded himself with.

And it's like, okay, well they're, they're important because they're important to me. So when I'm gone, is all this stuff meaningless? Like, because somebody else can, just take it or throw it away. Or like it, it meant something when I was there. So again, in this grand universe, kind of a thing of like, so once I'm gone, none of this matters anymore.

All this stuff I spent an entire life accumulating, like nobody cares. It's all, you know. They won't care the way you do. Yeah. And it won't have the same meanings in the same way, but like, that's, isn't that fine?

Like why, like we need to transfer over our, like how things felt to us to somebody else. Cause we can't do that. It's kind of like you have a tree falls in a forest and there's no one around. Do they hear it? Like with us, without us being worried about what are these, are these things going to have meaning?

Like they're inanimate objects, which I, I feel that same way. Like I have things that mean so much to me, but yeah, when I'm not here, they're not, no, they just won't. Like, unless we be like Marilyn Monroe or something and everyone wants to see the thing like, Oh, that was the shoe. On her foot. Like, Yeah.

But most of us don't have that experience unless we like our children or legacies and things like that or family members. But it, yeah, no, unfortunately it's like that probably just for the time while you're here. See, that's what I think of is I, and almost like threateningly now to my family members and like, Oh, you've got so much crap to go through. You don't even know. I guess I'm like, cause I've in recent years had to do that.

And for a couple of different family members and I'm like, it's, sad and disturbing but at the same time you're like what do I do with this stuff like you can't keep everything so like it is sort of heartbreaking to be like this whole person's life are these things and they're gone and now you can't keep everything so like what the hell does it mean like it's I don't know this this movie unlocked a lot of things in me. That's great yeah I mean I'm gonna watch it again soon I watched it twice but it was a few months ago and I'm excited to watch it again because I just, I loved it so much. But yeah, I think that, and that I guess is the sort of the bigger question too. And it's funny you use the tree in the forest because that's sort of the, people do it with like the, almost philosophy of life kind of thing.

And mine became more of like a happiness thing, which is sort of what we're looking at with her by the end of it. Because I think so much of our lives is about other people. And like you see, this is like her sort of going through a couple of relationships. But like in general, I think we're supposed to tell ourselves like we can be okay on our own. And by the end, she is at least what we see of this story, unless they're going to continue on somewhere down the line, but it's all that we know is she's by herself by the end.

And I'm like, so much of what I've in recent years, again, dealing with all the things I've gone through lately, I've just been like, I think so much of our life is that tree in the forest. Like if someone else isn't there to be part of your life, does it matter? You know, it's like, if you're the only one witnessing whatever nonsense you do throughout the day, like who cares? But if you got someone there that you're sharing your life with, like, it makes a difference. Like, I feel like that's the way we achieve that level of happiness that you see on her face when she's moving in.

It's like having someone there in her life is that level of happiness. And I think by yourself, you can be content. You can find a level of okay. But I don't know that you ever reach that high of happiness that you do when you're with someone. Now, you also don't hit the lows of happiness. our relationship falling apart level.

But I don't know, again, that was, that was, again, so many things I've been thrown into in the middle. Of this movie. Right. I mean, I, I, I feel that deeply. Those are things that I have definitely sat with myself, those types of questions.

Yeah. Like what is life if it's not witnessed by somebody else and is something I've spent a lot of time thinking about. And I'm, I'm hoping that, the answer is we can find that happiness on our own. And I think that, cause like, yeah, like what you said also, because the counter, like you can feel so much joy in a relationship, but the pain of when a relationship ends is also horrendous. And like, so being alone, you know, you avoid that, but then yeah, you don't get the highs.

But I think maybe it's like finding, being able to, it sounds so cheesy, but being able to find as much happiness on your own so that when you do find a partner, the fear of losing it doesn't feel like you're going to die. I think that, again, you want to tell yourself that. I really don't know. Again, we're on that journey. If we're going to get very deep here, we're all on that journey.

I don't know. I question it sometimes. I'm sure we all have, but I think the pursuit of the most healthy outlook is to try to find that. Definitely. But I'm not saying I have fared it up.

I am just on the pursuit of it. Still on the journey. Yeah. That's what we do. Yeah.

So I guess again, there's plenty of individual moments we could hit, but I think we've hit the bigger points, which is sort of what this movie does as far as I'm concerned. So I guess that's sort. Of if we're wrapping up on the overall movie, what is your takeaway from it? Number one is a viewer, but also, you know, being performance based yourself, like what do you also take from it as an actor? Well, I think to answer the actor part, Renata Reinsman is one of the first actresses and new actresses that I've come across.

She's not obviously a new actress, but new to me in the last few years that I've just been so inspired by. And that is the type of work and the type of career that I would love to aspire to achieve and be a part of. So that, watching her, I'm like, yes, this is reminding me of why I love acting and why I love movies in watching her. So that has been so exciting to feel that way about an actress again and projects. Because I think for a little while there, I was...

I wasn't feeling that way. And I think I had lost a bit of my spark in a lot of areas. And she's been this past year, one of the things that have like reinvigorated some of my love for this again. So that, that would be my answer to that. And then, and I guess as a viewer, the overall takeaway of like being overwhelmed by this movie is, Yeah.

I just think I also related to the character and like not every aspect, but like, I love in the sense that like, we're also human and we make mistakes and like what you have to see the ugliest parts of ourself play out would probably be so uncomfortable. And I loved that we got to see that for her and how she's, she's so comfortable with those parts of herself, which I, I, it seems and the character and, I am not when I think of my flaws, which I have many, it makes me so uncomfortable and I shy away from them. And I had before, and I don't know, I think as a viewer watching someone shift through their ugliest parts was really inspiring and really human. And I loved that. And then, yeah, I guess, I guess, I guess that like feeling like, that even though I only just found out about the scene that I mentioned before, I got about the looking in the mirror.

That is what I felt. Like, I felt like I, this was like her version of herself and like, and it was probably extremely biased. Like I didn't take the film so literal as in like, we're actually flies on the wall. It felt like as if she was narrating her, like the voice, even the narration, like feels like it was like, it's supposed to be her. Yeah.

After the fact removed somewhere. Yeah. Yeah. Still sort of you know extremely biased and having a bit of like a negative um lean to like you know like lens even though it might not be true like maybe that's not how other people would view her or maybe it would be better maybe it would be worse. That's certainly how i narrate my life i realize the type of person i am and the way that i do things that doesn't make any sense and seems to confuse and infuriate most people so i i i get it like that's certainly how i would also narrate my.

Life right right well there you go yeah i just loved it. Yeah she's she's amazing it is interesting if you believe the story that like before he made this movie she was to the point of kind of giving up on acting and was going to be a carpenter I did not hear that. Oh my. That's if, yeah, if, if these crazy stories online are true, it said, yeah, she was, she was ready to give up acting and pursue a career in carpentry because she just renovated a home and fell in love with the woodworking aspect of it. And she was gonna, you know, Harrison Ford this wife and just go be a carpenter.

He'd worked with her before and had her in his other movies and was like, no, I think you should, do more of this. And then I think as he sat down to write this movie, he was like, and I want you to be this character. So I think he sort of wrote it around the idea of like, no, you need to act more because you're amazing. And he's right. Watching this movie.

He's right. Like, yeah. And I'm so glad because now she's just, she's just going to be here doing it. And I can't wait to watch the rest of her films. Like I'm, she's in a horror movie that I don't watch a lot of horror because I'm, I get spooked. real quickly but i gotta see back rooms because she's in that um so you know just go with maybe one eye open and you know a blankie yes she's sort of.

Top of her game coming off the oscars last year and then back rooms will be interesting to see this is because we're sort of living in this moment right now it's it's possibly changing the industry at this point like I. Mean, it's a little bittersweet for me because I auditioned for it and I didn't know what it was at the time. I think most people didn't until it happened. You were either one of those kids that loved it or you had no idea what it was. Yeah, I was like, whoa.

And the audition was very tricky because there was just so much stuff going on. And now that I see what it is, I'm like, no. Why? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, but it'll be interesting because it is, you know, talking about that next generation and I haven't given up on the next generation. I don't get what they're doing because, again, I come from such an old, different version of that. But I do feel like there's still all these super smart, talented kids out there that are going to be taking the reins as time goes on. And like you see this, this director just came along and like people are blown away by what has happened and also did it. kind of out of nowhere, just out of YouTube and for minimal money compared to what it's pulling in now. So I, it'll be interesting to also see what the studios and studio heads sort of take with this concept and where it goes.

Yeah. I think it's so cool. Yeah. Well, do you have anything else that you want. To tell people about as far as stuff coming up?

Obviously turn it up is the one we, already addressed. But aside from that, is there other stuff you want to point people towards? Well, to be honest, I'll mostly point towards Turn It Up because that's the most tangible thing that people could potentially see. Whereas other things are so like in pre-production or post-production that are not nowhere to be found yet. So it would feel...

A little too early to say. But hopefully soon. In our distracting ourselves with technology, should they go find you online somewhere? Yeah, sure. Find me on Instagram if you want.

My username is just my name, Justine Nelson. See some of those awesome photos. Yeah, there's some photos on there. And then there's pictures of me. There's pictures of other people.

Yeah. And that's my only social media platform. Yeah. I think that's a lot at this point. Yeah, I mean, I have TikTok, but I don't post on it.

I scroll. I don't know what to do with it. I feel like I keep waiting for a new version to come along and be better than other things and nothing has. Oh, God, no, we need to stop. We can't have more.

But I don't like most of the ones that are Instagram's the closest thing. And like, it's so hit and miss and still not super interactive. So it's like, I don't know. There's just not a good version, but you still want to connect with people out there. So I just want a.

Good fun version and not one that's horrifying. Well, I hope you got that. Yeah. Yeah. Hopefully the world will come around.

But either way, thank you for coming along on this crazy journey. And it definitely has some very deep, bigger questions that you got thrown into there with this movie. So thanks for recommending it. It gave me an excuse to watch it as well. Well, I'm glad.

I'm glad. It's been lovely chatting with you, Brian. Definitely. Otherwise, yeah, I will get the word out and continue letting people know about Turn It Up. And I think that's about it.

Sounds cool. Thank you so much. All right. Otherwise, thank you for listening. This episode is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced and edited by the Oddity Studios, with music written and performed by Andrea Davidson.

For more on how to sponsor or support the show, email producer at moviemeltdown.com.