Episode 10 - Men Are Such Beasts

We're being way media hik. Mister Walders is check out with it. He's an actor at Fault Rise by the I'm a can't driver on the only cant driver in his place. Hello again, everybody, and welcome to night mister Walters a taxi podcast. I am HP your co host and with me as always is my co host.

Follow them alone, Follow alone? How are you tonight? You better? Smarting up meat ball? Once again, a little foreshadowing through our discussion, we'll discover just what that is.

Just a reminder we are doing these shows in broadcast order and not order of filming. This week we are taking on men are such beasts. This is written by ed Wine Burger in Stan Daniels and it you know, I looked ahead. Every episode in season one is directed by James Burrows, so we can probably dispense with the comedy routine and just it's called James Burrows Taxi basically, yeah, that's essentially what it is. This is another Tony centric episode.

So early in the show's run, it seems odd that they would be devoting a total of two episodes to our favorite Poluca. What's your take on that? Father alone? Well, they've only got so many characters that they can juggle. So you know they've they've cycled through everybody by now, haven't they.

We're just back to the start of the roster. Yeah, I guess so we we've circled back. We're at the top of the order. I guess we're back to Tony. My favorite episodes all start out in the garage.

I know a lot of them have started out in Marios. But we're back in the garage again. Tony, as I said, our favorite washed up boxer is sitting there looking confused, and he's apparently caught in a bit of a dilemma, and what I can only describe as a very strange example of exposition, he pours his heart out to Laka. He apparently got together with another Cabby who's out of Brooklyn. Tony's not sure if he wants to continue to see the woman.

He seems ambivalent about the whole thing, and of course he's pouring his heart out to Laka, and all Laka can do at this point is his patented Laca foreign man speak. I don't know if you had the same reaction, father Blow, but it's essentially just one big exposition dump. I liked it. I thought it was funny because I always enjoy Latka and his gibberish. However, the seed effectively ends, and then they tell us why it was funny.

Banta starts saying like, hey, how is it that I cannot understand anything you're saying? But I understand everything you're saying. Oh, and then he gives some more gibbers and then we get like, oh my god, we got the joke. Either do that at the beginning of the joke or don't do it at all anyway, that's really bothered. It's kind of like how Luke Skywalker can understand what Archer D two says even though it's a bunch of bloops and bleeps.

We don't know. It's just the way the world works. But you don't want to hear him. Luke Skywalker say, hey, are two? How is it that I can understand you?

So? Boo boo boop. That's a good one, Are two? You're wrong? I want to see that now.

I absolutely see. This sort of little mini drama wraps up and meanwhile, come perhaps the most inconsequential be story and what I can remember from Taxi. So a dejected reader walks in and informs Louie that he just had an accident in Cab seven twenty three. He tells Louie that he dented his fender and ran into a parked car. Louie just is ribbing him about it and busting his chops about it, and he, after more prodding from Louie, Alex further clarifies a dog ran in front of the car and it was either the Chrysler Cordoba or the dog, and of course this sends Louie into a fit.

You can actually see what I love about this part is you can see the veins bulging in Louie's forehead. He's so upset that you, Rigor, you chose the dog over a Chrysler Cordoba with Corinthian leather seats. He's apoplectic that he would do this. I also noticed the fury with which Danny DeVito was mustering to convey that part of the scene. That was pretty amazing.

My favorite part of the scene is the opening, however, when John steps in and says hi, Alex, and Rigor Bluez is right past him. I actually wrote in my notes appropriate that is our first anti Burns comments of this show. Boom Burn burns. And this is all made even worse by the fact that Alex tells Louie that a there were no witnesses and b that Alex left a note for the car owner, which is further sending Louie into a spiral of aggression and apoplexia. That's a problem here in this scene, however, which is and this isn't necessarily a problem of this show, it's a problem of all sitcoms in the goldfish length of memory of the characters, because weren't there just an entire garage full of cabbies standing up for a dog, like just a couple of weeks ago.

I think there'd be a little bit of a bigger pushback on Louie that he's so upset that Rigor didn't run a dog over when we know Riager's track record with canines. I mean, there is a big difference between an owner who's sort of nakedly being cruel to a dog in the backseat of the cab. And look, this isn't my cold cruel calculus. I love dogs, I'm a pet owner. I love it.

But I'm saying is maybe there's a difference between this awful abuse at the hands of an owner and an accident where you have to make a split second decision. Perhaps maybe I'm making excuses for these cabbies. I don't know. Look, I don't blame Louie for reacting the way he reacted. That's Louie.

But I think some of the other cabbies would have had Alex's back a little or vocally. Probably right. I think, as you put it, the Goldfish memory is probably what's at work here. In a huff, Alex sort of rallies the rest of the cabbies They're going to go for breakfast. Now we cut to Mario's, which begs the question, why are the cabbies gonna go to an Italian dive for breakfast in the morning?

Did you have that same thought cross your mind, Father Malone? My mind was too busy with thoughts of the movie Crawl. You remember the movie Crawl, of course, Oh, it's a fantasy classic. Well, in that the Beast, the main antagonist of the film. He has a fortress that disappears and reappears in other locations.

That's all I could think of, because I remember Marios being on a corner in New York City and what we're given here in the b roll is in the middle of a block, Mario appearing and reappearing elsewhere. There's a whole different sign. I could not make out the awning. It's the something room that they're now passing off as Marios. They need to knock it off unless they're making a game out of it.

The editors and that they're just going to show us random buildings and claim that's Marios every time. I kind of hope they are now. That is interesting because in a previous episode, I know you read the plaque and it was a palace, right, So what you're saying is and I didn't take note of this. Are you saying the b roll shows a totally different Mario's exterior different? Yes.

Wow, I'll have to check that out again. That is well spotted, especially in the first couple of episodes. I know there were instances where there they're making fun of the food at Mario's, how terrible it is and don't get this and don't order that. Yes, but have you ever had sausage, peppers, onions and eggs? No?

I have not. Well, that's why you would go to Marios at that earlier in the morning. It does sound good Curiously, you don't actually see what they're eating, although they're eating rather feverishly as if they're enjoying it. So perhaps the food is improved, maybe a new chef who knows they just got to be there for breakfast. See breakfast is the key to Mario's cuisine.

Ah well, and to be fair, the last time a Cavey went there for dinner it was the ill fated date between alex And and Jilla, so that didn't go too well. Get out of here, Alex, I'll kill you when you turn your back. I love I love the angela stuff. I can't wait till the next episode where she comes back, fantastic back. It's gonna be a delight.

The Cavies are there. Tony is not there, but he does join them, but he says he can't really stay because he's meeting Denise there. Denise clearly the woman that he's ambivalent about continuing to date from the opening, So girl, he's gonna break So no, But here's the thing. HP Banta enters. John is seated in the foreground.

He says, I'll get you coffee and scurries out of frame and leaves the scene. And I wrote in my notes, appropriate do maam? He leaves the frame it now it's suddenly in my mind became a vision of the Last Supper because are all crowded around one side of the table and it looks awkward, and I always think about the Last Supper and just like, hey, let's all sit on one side, like Peter, don't be a dick, Matthew and mere staying over here. You know. The thing that I noted in my notes that and that's a wonderful observation.

But what I noted in my notes was Tony does this thing. The only name I've ever known it from is Slatering from Saved by the Bell. Tony does this thing when he goes to sit down with the cabbies. He doesn't just sit down like a normal person. He takes the chair and he rotates it one hundred and eighty degrees and sits in it so that the back of the chair is against his chest and he's kind of resting, I think his arms on top of the chair.

Another question for you, father Milon, was this ever really a thing? Did you ever know anybody or yourself sit this way? Yes, I've known tons of people, mainly hoodlums, who's at this way? And I think it's it's it's a weird sort of theater being played this. I'm so casual I will turn my chair around and rest upon it.

Also, I think it's some some subliminal thing with look at how big my balls are. I need to sit in a chair this wide. My legs need to be splayed this big in order for me to just even rest with you. It does seem to be a certain type of tough guy, at least in these TV shows that were referencing that that does this, like it's here Ac Slaters from Saved by the Bell. It's obviously Tony.

I don't know. It bugged me when I saw it. To me, it seemed a little like an actorly thing to do, like you know how they always talk about actors like to have props and making choices. Certainly, I think in this case, that's just Danza sitting down. There's no grand tail.

It's just the way Danza sat down. That's totally fine, no choice there, he just did it. So he's sitting there and his weird position, and Tony asks Bobby's advice how to break up with Denise, which is weird too because you would figure as naive as Banta comes off, you would figure he has had some experience with women, so it seems odd that he would be This is something that I think Burns would be quizzing the cabbies on, not somebody with experience like Tony. My opinion, I agree with you, because this is this is a wrong character trait. Banta, I think, would have plenty of experience breaking up with girls, whereas Wheeler would you would go to on advice on how to be dumped.

But then Tony clearly doesn't understand the concept at all because he asks Nardo how she reacts when she's dumped or how she wants to be dumped, which is insane because nobody dumps Nardo. He comes off as just sort of mentally challenged in this scene, like just hopelessly naive and kind of an empty vessel. It just doesn't seem to have a real solid thought in his head. In the scene, it occurred to me that I'm now beginning to deeply enjoy what a creep Bobby Wheeler is. He's so gleeful advice on how to break up.

When he exits the scene, he takes that plate of food with him, and he's eating it on the way out. I'm really really beginning to dig Bobby. I noted that in my notes too. They're getting up in such a rush that he can't just like a normal person finishes food. He's got to take the plate with him, eating, scooping food into his mouth as he's walking out the door.

It was another odd choice. But you know, what are you gonna do? He asks Bobby's advice, and Bobby advocates, saying that his advice is tell her that she's too good for you, Tony, and that you don't deserve her. And to your point, what you were saying. He also, in a very ham handed way, asks e Lane how she deals with the same kind of relationship issues, and she advocates, of course, because it's a Lane and she's wonderful and she's sweet and she's guileless, and she says, look, just be honest with her, Tony.

That's what he That's what her suggestion is, be honest and let things play out the way they're going to play out. And that's fine. Now enter Denise played by oh Kil Edwards. Everybody, it is as if this show is just stacked unintended with my childhood crushes, Mary Lou Henner, Gail Edwards, Carol Kane's gonna show up, Dee Wallace is gonna show up, Doctor Joyce Brothers is gonna show up. I'm kidding about Doctor Brothers.

Anyway, this is Gail Edwards. She would eventually star for many years on a television series in the nineteen eighties called It's a Living about a bunch of waitresses and a penthouse type restaurant. But I mainly know her from her her starring turn and Alan Arcis's film Get Crazy, where she played the part of Willie Lohman, the returning stage man to the Saturn Theater on its New Year's Eve concert in nineteen eighty two. Since I brought that up, where, since we're talking about it, I advise everyone to go out and buy that Blu Ray. They get Crazy Blu Ray.

On the documentary, you might find a well, it's not a familiar face, but it's me anyway. Look, not just for the fact that my esteemed co host and best friend is in this documentary, but it is an all time cult classic of cult classics. They don't get any better, funnier, more raucous, more rocking, than get crazy, do yourself a favor and pick it up. She's great there, she's great here. Although I was afraid that at a certain point a production of Pirates of Penzance was going to break out thanks to the way her hair is styled.

Did you get that vibe? I did? I was, I couldn't quite place it, but you've you've crystallized it wonderfully. Yeah. Also, Denise is rocking a Buchanan Tartan scarf, which would place her ancestors on the shores of lock Lohman.

Either that or she just bought a random scar from put it on, But I just wanted to know that that was the Tartan she's wearing. Once again, you've you've spotted the things that no one else has spotted. Denise walks in. Tony insists that they sit at a different table from the other cabbies because he gets weird. Immediately she shows up and he kind of introduces her.

All of the cabbies who know that he's going to be breaking up with her or trying to all kind of look at each other and there's an awkward silence, and at that point Tony says, well, let's sit somewhere else because it just seems awkward. And then I think, at that point, doesn't someone say, oh, we were just leaving, And that's when they all kind of get up and start shoveling food in their mouths or whatever. I do know at one point she asks like, don't you want to introduce me to your friends? And Tony's response is, well, there doesn't seem to be much point. I love how oblivious Denise is.

He doesn't want to introduce to her friends. Her friends immediately peace out as soon as she shows up, and then Burns walks up and shakes her hand and says like nice knowing you or something like that, Like she doesn't hear any of it. She's just focused on Tony. She is, but in fairness, she's probably also focused on all the emphetamines and speed that she's been gobbling all day. They all say, well, we're just leaving, and they get up, and it's a strange tableau, but they leave Wheeler eating his sausage and peppers and eggs all the way out.

So they sit down and the first thing she does is slug down a handful of emphetamines and offers some to Tony. He takes three pills and she dry swallows them. She's hardcore, so she offers some to Tony, and Tony refuses. To Tony's credit, true to Elaine's recommendation, he comes right out and says they shouldn't see each other anymore. For a moment, she actually seems taken with his honesty.

She is deflated. She gives every indication that she's trying to process this information and trying to deal with it as best she can. She's showing a appreciation for how direct he was. It's a trait of his that she admires. Oh boyd is shit, like all of his traits, like everything.

She's never letting him go, That's what she says. She says, Well, the guys would have buttered her up first or told her some long convoluted story to get out of dating her, but not Tony. And that's why, as you said, father Malone, she'll never let him go. And at that point we have Now we talked about this in the paper marriage episode, this odd shot from the sort of wedding decorations that pans down. We have our second odd yet chilling shot of the series.

Are we talking about the fourth wall break? Yes. After she says she'll never let him go, she cuddles with him and Tony looks at the camera. He breaks the fourth wall, as Father Malone said, and the camera zooms in on his expression. The weird display has only made weird because we start to hear Lata singing as foreign man, but there's no context.

We don't know what's happening. It almost seems like it's happening in his mind, in Tony's mind as he's processing this, what's happening to him? Are we now his confidence? He looked at us, He acknowledged our existence. He knows where they're watching.

I'm going to start now viewing the rest of Taxi through this lens as well. There's the John Burns slow descent into madness portion of the show, and now the Banta section. It was sort of chilling because we know that he wants to break up with her desperately, and now we know why because she's, you know, popping emphetamans like there's no tomorrow. She's clingy, she's frankly scary, and the look of hopelessness yet resignation on his mug as the camera zooms in and we hear lacas singing and his foreign man. It was almost too much for me to process myself, Hpican to speak for you.

But those are all negative traits that she's displaying. But we all know why he was with her. Oh yeah, I am so little. I mean, you know, it's what drew him to her in the first place, is clearly what is now repelling him in the second place. Right as speedy as she is, she's still adorable, and you'd know the sex was crazy and all of the things that will eventually trip up a relationship are great in the initial bloom.

I'm trying to remember. I think maybe this whole relationship had taken place over a couple of weeks. It's not as if they were serious, and at least from his perspective, serious in any way. At the same time, we don't know, we don't know what those two weeks. Hell, Tony's a nice guy.

Maybe she was sending all the signals that she was really fucking serious and he was just like, ah, yeah, good, that's that's great. Like just because Tony's kind of a dummy and she was, you know, believing everything he was telling her. I'm just saying there are two signs to every story, I might have to side on the Gale Edward's side. I'm not going to say that Tony is blameless in this whole situation that's unfolding, but at best you can say that she all the cards are on the table with her. I mean, she literally sits down in a public place in Marios and chugs down three black beauties without any any liquid just gulp.

She's definitely hardcore. We fade out from this strange display of Tony and in hell as it were, we fade back into the garage where Lacca is happily. Now we know why he's We hear this singing because Lacca is working on a cab. As Alex walks in, we're getting back into the B story here. He walks in and Louie takes out a toolbox that has Louie scrawled in it in like marker.

It looks again set decorators. Bravo, bravo, because that's exactly what I would expect Louie to have in his cage. A toolbox, a wooden toolbox with Louie matched into the side of it. He tells Alex that they need to fill out a property damage report for the accident that Alex had. Bobby informs a Lane that they're going to reenact the because she asks like, what are you what are you guys doing?

Bobby says, well, they're going to reenact the accident, and that quote unquote it's fun. He's giddy, and you know what, he has a right to be giddy, because, like Bobby Wheeler, I love a reenactment like this where they lay out a map, or you're just drawn in the in the dirt, you know, like, Okay, you're gonna be the bottle cap, who's the stick? Get that out of here? Like that kind of stuff. I love.

So when they start setting up with a traffic light and all these little figurines representing things, oh man, I'm all in. Not only is he gleeful, but all the activity in the garage basically grinds to a halt. The garage all stops and they gather around the poker table where Louis is setting up his toolbox and all the little miniature pieces to create the accident reenactment. Everybody is is stop what they're doing and watching this play out, and Louie proceeds to pull out all sorts of different models out of this It's almost like a clown car. He just keeps pulling things out of this box.

There's a traffic light that actually lights up. He takes it out and I think it's it's reading stop and he says to read, like, what was it? What was it on? He said no, it was green, and he goes pretty and he flicks a little switch and it goes from stoplight to green light. I was like, this is great.

Whoever found that in the prop department? Bravo? What a great mechanical thing. Bobby is gleeful because who doesn't love a good reenactment, And by extension, we the audience are gleeful because it's just funny to watch this whole thing play out and hear Alex describe the accident and the streets and Louie is pulling all these weird action figures and things out of the out of the box. They finished reenacting the accident, but there's really not much more to say about that.

It's it's pretty straightforward. Alex just says, I was coming this way, the thing ran in front of me. I swerve to avoid it, cracked into the thing. Boom. You forgot the most important part of the scene, and that is Nardo's outfit, which is this corduroy vest and slacks with a black blouse underneath it.

It's my favorite Nardo episode ever, those corduroy separates man. Her fashion choices in the next few episodes are pretty spectacular. It's funny because you know, she's supposed to be a single mother raising her kids in the city, holding down two jobs. But boy, they can't resist dressing Mary leu Henter and like the most extravagant and chic finery she's wearing, like neck ties and vests, and that's because she's working two jobs and the other one requires that that refinement. It just looks like all all those clothes have to be pretty expensive on a single mother's set.

Say name right now, Ralph t. Schlayne. He is the costume diner here on Taxi and we're going to talk about a little bit a little more at the end of the episode too, but he's the one dressing Elaine so fantastically, and bravo to him. Look, there's the other side of this is obviously they want to show her in her best light. More power to them.

It's I think it's wonderful and then meanwhile, Tony at this point returns and Elaine asks how the breakup went, and he proceeds to tell the cabbies that he tried breaking up, but then she, as we all saw, she said, she's never letting him go. She tried her best to rope him in with kisses and affection, but he stayed strong, and finally she walked out of Mario's and he reckons that she finally got the message. He accepted the breakup and left. Yeah, what can go wrong? Nothing?

Nothing at all. Another weird part is that he says this, and the cabbies all seemed way too happy with the fact that he's actually successfully broken up. I mean, they're like applauding and going, way to go, Tony, way to go. Would you really like if a friend of yours had broken up with their girlfriend or what have you? Like, would you be so gung ho about yay?

Good for you for you? It's in god think. I think I'd probably say, like, well, that sucks, sorry to hear that, man, I'm glad you handled it well. Yeah, But you know what, Tony's an athlete. He understands things a little differently than the rest of us.

It seems like everything is back on a good path. Louie starts giving out the cabs and he mentions Delaca to get one ready for the quote unquote new driver, and who walks in But Denise, like a bad penny, she keeps turning up. We know that she was working out of Brooklyn, but now she's transferred to Sunshine Cab, clearly to be close to Tony, and that's not good. That's not good news at all. You don't know that maybe she just likes Sunshine better.

Also, the moral of the story now becomes clear. No good deed goes unpunished, because that's Tony acts like a straight up guy, and what does he get, stalker? So we go to commercial with this new development, we cut back to the garage. Sometime later, a dejected Tony delivers his booking envelope to Louie nineteen dollars you bet a smart nut meatball. That's when he calls them the meatball.

Meanwhile, then incomes Denise and she books two hundred and seventeen dollars, which Louie gleefully announces to the other cavees that it's a new Sunshine Cab Company record. Two hundred and seventeen dollars. Louie now sees that Denise's popping pills, and he starts to admonish her about it. He says, those things can destroy your health. And when she informs him that this is the reason why she can work eighteen hours straight, it's Louie's turn to do one eight asked, because she has enough to pass out to the rest of the caves.

Now hd what she describes as her particular cocktail of choices one Benny and two black beauties. Yeah, I don't know how much experience you have with Benny's and black beauties, but I'll just say I have some. So Benny's, Benny's his, Ben's a dream, Right, that's just straight up speed. So that's what's keeping her up. Right.

Black beauties which were pretty plentiful in the sixties and seventies. You hear about them a lot, and you could get them pretty easily until nineteen seventy one when the whole Food and Drug Administration started putting some restrictions on it and stuff. But do you know what, do you know what a black beauty actually is? For the record, I have zero experience with any of this stuff. I have no idea what a black beauty is.

Okay, it's equal parts of Levo and dextroamphetamines, and they basically went out of favor as the eighties came on and the say no to drugs people took over. But it's basically the exact same formula as Adderall. Really oh yeah, so she's taking a double dose of Adderall with a speed chaser. It seems very heavy in the context of the episode. I think it's New York, it's the seventies, it's a dirty, grimy cab company, and she's just popping pills like there's no tomorrow.

There are so many episodes of Taxi so far and will continue to be that are casually dropping subject matter that would require an entire, very special episode in the next decade of television. I agree this is so casual. Granted, the Caves, including Louie, they all react with some element of horror at the notion of popping pills and what have you. But at the same time, the biggest laugh of this whole episode is coming up, which is this whole thing is played for laughs. The rest of the Cavies are playing poker around that table and Denise comes over and she starts to play kissy face with Tony and he's just he's had enough.

It sets him off and he pushes her back. Rieger walks in and he seems miserable. He just doesn't seem like himself. He's complaining that he has a headache, and at that point Louis says he has to go talk to the boss about the accident, so he's going to go upstairs the second floor. Yeah.

I don't know if it's mister Ratledge or mister McKenzie. I think mister Ratledge was the first. I could be wrong about that. It's either Ratledge or McKenzie. Alex asks around for an aspirin and Denise suppliges with some uppers explain that they quote unquote worked the same as aspirin, and she takes them all the time for headaches.

He takes them and his headache goes away immediately, but when he asks her what he took, she tells him that their black beauties, which again sets him off rightfully, so he says, wow, those things, those are bad. Those things can really kill you. You know, that's bad. He's alarmed, But then we see him slowly but surely becoming more and more speedy. He's talking more and more, He's talking faster and faster, until finally he kind of gleefully walks up the stairs to go talk to the boss.

By this point, he's singing bye bye love to himself because he's just off on tangents. He's free associating. He's going nuts. Eighties. As it turns out, we're correct, drugs are bad.

They'll make you sing the Everly Brothers. It's totally casual, right, It's it's kind of like, at least at this point, it's played for laughs, right, Although to be fair, in this scenario, Alex lived through the sixties and ought to know better when somebody hands you a pill to swallow it without saying what is this screw? But I get the feeling that he operated in far different circles than like, for example, that Iggy would have circulated in the jail casings on those black beauties were black. If I were to hand you a black pill, what would you you just go, oh, just we'll get rid of my head ache, Like yeah, yeah, definitely, of course I would ask for the sake of the comedy, we just need Alex to choke it down and then ask questions later.

It's I think Alex exactly what he was taking, but likes to remain naive in the eyes of others, so he goes away. Alex goes away for now. Now Tony is admonishing Denise for now. Now she's giving out Neuman. It's time to draw lines in the sands.

He's upset now because not only is she bringing these drugs into the cab company, but she's given them away to the cabby's, including the most trusted cabby of all, Alex. She vows she'll never take another the pill again, and she throws the bottle on the floor. Now this is where my favorite joke of the whole episode comes in. She throws it on the floor and immediately three cabbies from out of nowhere jump like sharks closing in on a piece of chum in the water. They all at the same time, like dive on the floor and grab at this pill bottle.

It's wonderful and it is a hilarious gag, and it obliterates Tony's argument with her, like, oh, you're you're pushing these on the cat. Now the cabbies want those baby the caves already have their supplies, but here's some free ones. It all goes back to what you've said in some of the previous episodes Fall Them Alone, where you've had some ambivalence about the slippery morals involved in some of these late seventies TV show. My ambivalence was categorizing it as slippery morals and now rewatching it. I go, oh no, that is a proper description of what was going on, particularly given the pilot of this show, in which tone he describes a situation where he took a bunch of a bunch of Benny's in order to drive like forty eight hours one time.

I forgot about that. That little bit of voiceover during the very first episode Tony knows what it does, He's taken them kind of destroys his argument. Nevertheless, that's my favorite part of this episode. Tony tells her it's not the pills. It just has to end in her best fatal attraction voice.

She creepily responds, and she says it will never end. Tony is now kind of treating this like a Childwood who keeps getting repeatedly denied. He now has to go to Louie to fire Denise like he's he's at his wits end. This is when Louis says, fire her, I want to breed her. Weird phrase anyway, it is a weird phrase, but very appropriate for Louie.

Tony tells Louie, look, it's either me or her. So Louie says, bye, Banta, It's nice knowing you. And then Bobby gets up and says, well, then he's gone too, to which Louie says, well, bye to you. The Spartacus moment here in the cab company they have them a lot. There's this chain reaction, like you said, of cabbies quitting, including Bernardo and Lacca and all the other background players, and this all culminates and Lacca leading a yak dubet yak dube chant which all the other cabbies sees upon and start advancing on Louie chanting yak dube yak dube.

Louie after a bit of silliness with a fire extinguisher where he dares the cabbies to cross the line or he's it's one of those old school fire extinguishers to the Hudson Sprayer type ones where it was just going to be this weird liquid that would come squirting out instead of like a foam or a halon that we have nowadays. Anyway, I missed those. It just looked like water to me, some sort of chemical retardant. Ah, that would make sense. So after this sort of mini revolt has happened, Louie finally relents and says, all right, pill popper, you're fired.

But still Denise refuses to let to when he go, and proceeds to tell him that she's going to be everywhere he goes. She will be there. She just it's Tony's nightmare. Frankly, it's any guy's nightmare who's tried to break up with somebody who's a little bit on the crazy side. Yeah, she won't let him go.

Then Elane steps in. He says, Tony, you're just gonna have to slug her, and then he does, and they roll credits and we all applaud. That would not have been out of place given some of the shifty morals that are on display here. In all serious this, Lane says to Tony that he's just gotta he has to get mean to get rid of her. He's got to hurt her, which is a little weird the way she faces to slug her emotionally well, she the fact that she says you have to hurt her to get rid of her is a little bit odd coming from Elane, who's usually the most compassionate of all dealing with the meth head looney bird.

Fair enough, hey call the cops. Tony should have, but again, I don't think there were laws on the books that protected people the way they do now for things like stalking and obsessive behavior, all that kind of stuff. Tony tries yelling at her, and he even pounds on a cab to get his point across, to maybe demonstrate even the slightest possibility of violence on his side. She completely diffuses it by saying she loves it when he's like this, that's catnip to crazy girls. And this is when Elaine steps in again and tries to explain to Denise that Tony's in love with someone else, and who is that someone else?

Louis de Palma, of course, Yeah, Okay, Look, they're indulging in a bit of gay panic comedy here, which is not great. But at the same time you can tell the intent is not that, and I guess that's the ultimate qualifier when it comes to humor, whether or not it's the intent behind it, and I don't think that's what's going on here. And they play it very, very funny, where it's just like, it's more about the desperation of Tony and the willingness of Louie to support him that it is about aren't we funny as gay people? Oh? Hundred percent?

I agree to his credit, Louie does a slow burn that would make Ted Knight swell with pride. I mean, he is fantastic. Again, a less nuanced comedy might have played it a little more inappropriately, but I thought it was that part of it was, Okay, this is enough for Denise. She finally got it through her head that Tony didn't want to have anything to do with her, and she's gone. And that's basically the end of the episode.

However, there is an epilogue where Alex finally comes down from the boss's office. By Alex comes speeding down them stairs, baby making predictions of the future. Oh, he's talking about football, and he's talking about all kinds of just riffing off off his head. Because he's talking, you get the impression the Boss couldn't get a word in edgewise, so it worked in Alex's favor. He just talked up, you mean streak.

The scene would be re enacted in the classic train spotting when Spud has to go apply for a job and takes a little bit of speed, so he talks too much and they won't they won't give him the gig. Good call. So Alex comes downstairs and sits. The cabbies themselves all get annoyed at his speediness, and they all leave the table except for Laca, who can only look on with wide eyed in a sense, is only Laka ken and the episode is over. Let's break this down, Okay, we'll talk about some of the good things first.

I'm getting the sense that you enjoyed this episode more than me. What were some of your very good moments from this episode? Following along? Oh, everything I've already mentioned obviously, But here are some things and I hadn't mentioned him. Joseph Armetta is another name I want to shout out.

He's the set decorator here. He's the one who made that Louis box you mentioned earlier, and no doubt put the monogrammed Ell coffee mug that Louis seems to be toting around with him the cursive script ell coffee mug. I thought that was also a nice touch, no disrespect to either Gail Edwards or Tony Danzer during the sort of final confrontation, that they're very good at the scene. I watched the episode a few times, but honestly, I couldn't pay any attention to either of them during that dust up because framed behind them is this older blonde from outer space. She's wearing one of these foil NASA jackets.

Now, on a show that is constantly surprising me with its background players, I thought, well, they've they've reached the top of the mountain there, right, No, because they cut to a wide shot when they're talking to Nardo and there is this leggy blonde with a red vest and pantsuit combo and a yellow shirt. Oh my god, I was in background player Heaven. It's background extravaganza. And so once again I have to mention the man Ralph T. Schlane.

He's the costume designer here. He was the He did a couple the TV movies and then was The Bob Newhart Show's costume designer until seventy eight, where he became the costume designer here on Taxi, which he was until eighty three, and then he was the costume designer on New Heart until the day he died. And he's worth his weight in gold just for background players. We've already mentioned that the rest of the characters, the main characters are all costume perfectly, and he continues to innovate with their costumes. But what he's doing back here, it's it's like they dropped the cab company in pepper Land.

I don't know, it's worth a rewatch just for them. That is exactly what I'm going to do. Father alone. I cannot wait to see this. I want to see this, this NASA foil jacket, and I want to see this weird you know, blonde with whatever she's wearing.

That sounds phenomenal, That sounds great. Those are very good things that you're talking about. To that, I would add three egers amphetamine rush and I already talked about my love for the dive for the pills. I think that's incredible. De Vito is fantastic, is always he has some really really great, funny slow burn moments, and frankly, we don't there's a minimum of burns which can only be a good thing, right right, And as stated, we now know Banta knows we're watching and I hope to see more of that in the future.

Is this some proxy that he's invented in his mind that follows them on his adventures like fight Club? I don't know. This is all the mind of Tony Danza. He invented Tony Banta. There was a show years ago called Life on Mars, and if I remember correctly, it was about a cop who had been shot in the line of duty and he's basically on life support at his bed.

But there's some I think he in his mind he goes back to the seventies, but throughout the whole thing, he's hearing beeps and boops coming from all of the medical equipment that he's hooked. So he's creating this life for himself from his hospital bed. Maybe Banta was had a brain injury at his last fight and now he's just created this world around him, populated with colorful characters and interesting adventures. I don't know. Maybe that makes sense.

Could it be we are now stuck in the moment where the champ slugs him at the end of one punch of Banta. We're just in a loop in Tony's mind. Now, Oh, look, Gail Edwards is fine. I think she's a welcome sight. I loved her and get crazy.

I think I used to watch It's a Living on occasion when I was a kid. Didn't understand the show. But you know, she's fine. That's about the sum total of what I could pull out of this. Is there anything else that I haven't mentioned that you want to bring up that we haven't talked about yet.

Blah blah blah. No, alrighty, then now we get to the bad. Let's talk about the bad. I would say for me, this is a ten minute story that gets stretched out to a full episode. There's very little happens in this episode.

Basically, Tony dates a girl, wants to get rid of her, she refuses, it causes a dust up, and then she finally leaves ten minutes. Yes, I agree with you. However, the alternative is more reader is in trouble for saving a dog. Well, no, that's another bad that I'm getting to that. The B plot is even more inconsequential because it really adds up to nothing.

He gets into an accident, he has to file a report, He talks to the boss, while he's speeding, and that's it to me. This is completely minor and an inessential episode. Finally, to piggyback on the ten minute story stretched out to feature length, the show just seems to move at a glacial pace for me, just little by little, we're just inching our way towards the end of the show. What did you think of the alone? I think I agree with all of those criticisms.

It's not like the brightest of gems, but I certainly enjoy it. Look, we were deluged recently with a lot of burns. We were burned by burns frequently, so even a minor episode like this is going to be better to me by comparison. But at the same time, I like it perhaps more than I should, because because it is not a simple aspirational episode, I'm kind of tired of those. I just couldn't get past the feeling I got that this was just there was just not a lot going on in this episode, and what there was going on really didn't pique my interest all that much.

Let's talk a little bit about about yellow lights. What do you say? So, what does he know? Like me? To remind everybody, we're scoring this on a scale from one to five yellow lights.

Five yellow lights is the quintessential taxi episode. One yellow light is I may never want to see this one ever again. Follow them alone. What do you give this episode? I give men are beasts three yellow lights?

You give it three yellow lights? Better than average? You're saying this episode is I cannot believe this. Explain yourself. I don't have to explain myself to your HP, but I will.

Gale Edwards Buchanan tartan scarf casual speed usage, dosing a beloved member of the taxi cast with zero repercussions. In fact, it's somehow a good thing and does forrest Rigor to predict the future. He predicts that the Steelers are going to win the Super Bowl. Guess what they did that year? Three yellow lights?

Woof, well, I gave this episode one yellow lights what I was all ready to give it two yellow lights, just for the dive, for the pills, and for the sake of Louise Antics and his masterful slow burn. But again, if I'm evaluating the scale and thinking of this, now, five we agree is perfect. Like that, it's a perfect peerless example of taxi. I always say this if aliens came down to Earth and asked us, what is the perfect episode of Taxi? A five yellow lighter would be it.

But conversely, what would be the episode that I would not want to revisit? That would be a one yellow lighter? How did you give Blind Date? Well? I gave I think I gave Blind Date three yellow lights?

Maybe four? I think I agree. I think you gave it four. It might have been four. I didn't have to go back.

It's probably. It feels like I question. Now the question must be asked. You can watch that one or this one? What are you going to watch right now?

Are you going to watch? Men are beasts? Are you going to watch Blind Date? And tell me which deserves one light? To be fair, I think if I'm gonna watch one, I'm gonna watch I'm gonna want to rewatch.

You're gonna watch anything but Blind Date? And yet that has three to four. You're gonna get out of town HP take a cab. No, no, no, no, no, you didn't let me finish. I would rewatch Blind Date because, if for no other reason, I love hearing your angela impression in the back of my mind thinking about it.

That's uh, that's incorrect. You're still voting for the other show. You would still watch the other show if you did not have my impression in your skull, and given the choice, given your druthers, you would pick this one. No, no, no, no, I would still watch Blind Date. I have to say I would still watch that.

I would I Look, I don't have to explain myself to you. I would watch that over license HP. Again, I'm not a good prognosticator because I came into this thinking to myself, Wow, nothing happens, this is so, this is so dull, Like, surely Father Malone is going to hate this episode more than I did. Nope, Nah, man, No, Look, frankly, I think Gail Edwards, Like, if it was anybody but Gail Edwards in the part, I suspect you would probably have trimmed it down a light or two. Perhaps I would have dropped it to two.

I certainly would not have given this a one. That is total insanity. I know I'm not going to change your mind. I'm not trying to. I don't want to.

I just want you to know that I know that you are insane. I call it as I see it. And I didn't like this episode. I was actually surprised watching this. Maybe it's because I watched it with a more critical By this time, I got an idea rewatch it and watch those background characters and see if they don't merit an extra light.

I guarantee you they do, and that's that's probably fair. Like I said, I do fully intend to watch watch it again for the background players. But unless it's a radical reinvention of what I've just seen, I can't imagine it's going to change my opinion. But we'll get back, not in this next episode, listeners, not the memories of eight h four episode, but the episode after that. You're going to hear an apology by HP.

It's possible. I never say never, but it would take a lot. So just to summarize, I gave this episode one yellow light. Father alone gave it three yellow lights. But it's another surprising difference of opinion there.

But that's that's what makes this show great, I suppose. So that's going to wrap it up for this particular episode, Father alone, Where can people find you when you're not clocked into the garage? If you'd like to hear more of my voice, and I can't imagine you would go over to weirding Way Media. I host or co hot most about half a dozen shows over there, too, many of the name here. I am also proud to be on the weirding Bay Media Network.

In addition to this fine podcast, you can hear me on Noise Junkies, which is a music podcast with myself, Father Alone, and the wonderful Heather Drain. You can also hear me here and there on the Dark Destinations podcast music and that's fantastic. It's my favorite. Thank you again for listening, for myself and for fatherom alone. Take care and we'll talk to you next time.

Nine mister Balders