A Friend in Deed

Welcome to The Shabby Detective, yet another Colombo podcast. I'm your host, Mike White, and joining me, of course, is mister Christasue and I get to do this again, so go ahead and roast me. But this will be the third time I make this joke. My appearance on this show was spared, no expense. They brought it, They pulled out all the stops to have me on this episode.

No expenses were spared, if you know what I mean. Richard Kylie. Oh okay, that's my third time making a Richard Kylie Jurassic Park joke, because I believe I've made it on Night Gallery twice because he was on two episodes of Night Gallery. Right, he was the Nazi at one point and then something else. But I remember Father Million rolled his eyes it me the last time at it's all just do it again?

Why not? Fuck it? Who cares? Man? You know that movie a lot better than I do.

There are some lines for that movie that are that occupy rent in my head, free rent free. So yes, ah ah, that's pretty much it got Dodson here. Yeah, it's pretty much. Any ned Re lines for me, fair fair on this episode of The Shabby Detective We're not talking about Jurassic Park. We're talking about a friend.

Indeed, did this the final the eighth episode of the third season. Directed by Peter Falk's good friend Ben Gazzara and written by Peter S. Fisher. This episode dropped Originally May fifth, nineteen seventy four, dropped it was nineteen seventy four. This episode aired forward over the air, Yes, yes, where you had one chance to see it, unless maybe you were Elvis Presley and had your own home youmatic machine where you could record things and watch them on the the Lisa Marie or whatever the plane was.

So yeah, still fucking crazy to think about. We could just flip on Peacock and watch episodes of Clumbo like it's nobody's business. Like it really is a time of wonder and miracles, folks that we live in. Like I got to figure out how to turn on subtitles on there because I don't know how to do it. This episode stars the one and only, as you said, Richard Kylie Uh and Michael McGuire also, and what an unusual episode because by the time this starts, somebody's already dead.

It is Michael McGuire's wife. He is Hugh Caldwell, missus Caldwell's dead, and he calls up his old buddy Up. He's not here, sorry, says his wife Margaret. But our friend Mark Halpernan is over at the club, so Hugh gives him a call over there ends uping up kind of rude to the waiter. I think the matre d you know, just kind of walks off while he's talking.

But yeah, hey man, I need you to help me out. My wife is dead. So he immediately man Mark Helpernan is some sort of devious motherfucker because this guy comes up with a plan to take care of his buddy Hugh and also take care of his problem, which is his wife Margaret, because she holds the purse strings in his family. Apparently he likes to lose quite a bit when he's out at the club playing high stakes backgammon. Holy cow, you're gonna need a pair of devils to get me out of that one.

Look at those two fives. Wow, so so over the top. So, Chris, what did you think of a friend? Indeed, it is unlike any Columbo episode we've seen up until this point in so many ways. I mean, look, Valever is here, He's integral to the story, and you almost forget that he's there for a good portion of it.

He's been in what three to this is his third appearance in Colombo. There's a lot of stuff going on. I think it's a fun episode. I actually have very few problems with it. I actually think it makes use of its time rather well too.

I mean it's an hour and a half, so it's an hour thirty eight, so it's a feature length, and for it being feature length, I didn't find it to drag a whole lot. There's one part that kind of drags, And again I'm just wondering, like, who the fuck wanted to do this if it wasn't just Peter Falk and Ben Gazara, which I kind of think it was given what we know about them and given what we've seen with Peter Falk just wanting to do Peter Falk things sometimes in this show. But all that aside, I mean, what a wild episode. At one point, Richard Kylie just jumps out of a helicopter right above a swimming pool, Like that's a thing that happens in this episode. That's just I don't know, it's interesting, and you mentioned it, you know, we kind of haven't given away the other part of the episode that's just is insane.

This is the first time that Colombo knows the person who's the murderer, like straight up knows him. Yeah, because that is a really good twist. Not only does he know this guy, but this guy is essentially his boss. It's the commissioner of the police. Like that for me is the is the real success of the episode is It's not that I didn't see it coming because I read the description of the episode, so I knew, But it's still done so well that I forgot that that was part of it because there is so much else going on.

There are enough moving pieces within it. Yeah, Peacock. Unfortunately, like the episode synopsis or descriptions are pretty bold for the most part and say exactly what's going on. But I can imagine not knowing that twist and it happening. Because for me, when that twist happens and it turns out like he's literally Colombo's boss, oh, like that raises the stakes.

I don't think they go as far as they could have. I think they kind of introduce it and then don't do as much as I would have with it. But I like that. That's an interesting angle that this episode takes because it makes it feel very different and a lot of the episodes very different. I'm sure we'll kind of get into it, but it's a very different episode of Colombo in a very good way.

I really like this one. I love that it is a policeman that he's investigating. I love just how wiley he is, and that you know this criminal is really I mean he I don't know when he comes up with all of the moves that he's about to make, but it feels like he's had this in his back pocket for however long. Like, Okay, if somebody comes to me and says they want me to cover up a murder, I'm going to have to have them do me a solid in return and cover for me killing my wife. I kept comparing this in my mind to strangers on a train.

A little different than strangers on a train in that there is well, there's no agreement between Dye and Bruno, that one that we're going to kill each other's problems that we have. But this whole thing of I now have information over you. You're gonna have to do me a solid now, quite pro quo. And now you're gonna have to help me cover up the murder of my wife since I helped you cover up the murder of your wife. And just all those things where he's like, oh, I saw someone across the way, and then it gives the press conference and he makes it seem like his wife saw the quote unquote murderer as well, and the all the journalists are like, oh did your wife what did your wife see?

What'd your wife see? And then when she dies, he's like, oh, oh darn, oh damn, my slip of the tongue. Margaret never saw anything. The killer must have come back and thought that she saw him. It was like, Wow, you're really laying it on thick here.

But I love it. I love this episode. Yeah, Richard Kylie is a real piece in this movie peace being of shit And and that's the thing I mean, for me, these episodes really are working, you know, a firing on all cylinders. When the villain is as devious and as like able to navigate his own situation, in this case, his situation as well as Colombo can chase after them. I like that.

It's, you know, one mouse running around and a cat's chasing after him. But the mouse has many holes to go through, but at some point, although there will be no more holes to run through, and the cat's gonna get you. We see that here. I think that the way that they handle it here is very interesting. But to your point, I like that the stakes are raised.

I like that Richard Kylie, like I wouldn't have been surprised if he'd gotten away with it. He does a good enough job. He slips up a little bit. I mean the way he slips up is like shockingly idiotic, in like, it's shocking how much of an idiot this guy, who's been pretty smart for the most part, has been I do. I love that he is able to more or less navigate the entire situation up until, like the last moment he has to get gotten by Colombo to be caught.

He is caught in the act by Colombo, which I like that. I like that we get all the way to the very last moment and then he gets caught. So yeah, and again, Richard Kylie's just he's up there now with some of the best, with some of the best batties on this show. Well, it makes me wonder, is he the guy that Jean Barry's doctor Ray Fleming was reaching out to when he's like, get this guy off of my case because he was friends with the commissioner. I don't know if it's the same commissioner or not, but I would love to think that the commissioner is the same guy that Richard Kylie is, the guy who said Okay, yeah, no problem, I'll take care of Colombo and then turns around and goes, Columbo, something's up with this guy.

You really need to press this investigation. I would love if he I mean, he has to know how smart Colombo is, because to your point, everything that he's doing, all of the slip ups are stupid little things, are like things that other criminals could probably get away with. This whole thing of oh, she keeps her nightgown under the pillow, but he took a nightgown out of the closet and put that on her. So that doesn't make any sense for the way that this was. If it was the husband, he would have known that.

So it had to be somebody else besides the husband. And it's just like all these signs pointing at Richard Kylie's character, it's like okay, and yeah, everything that he does, it's like, oh no, it shouldn't have been that. It should have been this, you know, Oh, the knobs were wiped clean, so she would have left fingerprints. The only fingerprints were there were on this phone and not this other phone. All of these little things.

And then when it comes to god, I love Columbo when he finds that the victim, the Margaret, has drowned, and the way he walks into that bathroom and just walk right in and goes right into the tub one of the best shots for me. I love it. I really like the bathtub payoff that it's it's ultimately I think that this is the bathtub that gets Richard Kylie more or less right. Like at least my perception of the end of the episode is it's it's as much the bathtub as it is anything else. Because what happens when you drown someone They inhale water, what happens to the water stays in the lungs?

What does water in a bathtub have soap? What does water in a pool not have soap? So And what's funny is the episode kind of leads you down the path of like, well, there's not gonna be anything there, that's what you think, because they say like the chlorine more or less disappears, but no, like the soap is there, So that's the indicator. I mean, what's funny is we say that Richard Kylie's smart, But I would wonder because you kind of brought it up and maybe I don't know, you can kind of have this discussion, but is he smart or is he the biggest fucking idiot that we've met because he literally knows what Colombo's deal is. Like you said, I would actually be curious listeners, because I know you're listening.

Please let us know how many times those of you who watch the show all the time, which I know that there are plenty of you as well, up until this point, up to the end of season three, how many times has the commissioner been mentioned? Because now we know who that is, at least one of them. Possibly, I don't are there more than one commissioner. He's the deputy commissioner right well, And there's also you know, it's been quite a few years since Colombo put that crafty psychiatrist behind bars, so we also don't know like the chronological time of Columbo, like is this all taking place and like, oh, he just busts these guys every other day, like how much time is in between it. But that's why I wonder, like, or is he just a massive moron who knows Columbo's gonna come investigate and knows that Colombo is this like powerhouse of a detective and he does this anyways, like you've done the thing that you're putting people in jail for, okay, and now you're going to jail because you went toe to toe with Colombo.

Well, I'd love the other parts of this because this whole episode is just setting stuff up and knocking it down, setting it up and knocking it down. This whole thing of Kylie pretends that he's a thief that has been hitting all of these these upper Lachelon mansions. He's going around, and so he just goes through his friend's wives a jewelry box and takes all this jewelry, leaves the ring on her finger. That was a stupid thing. But then when the one guy's just like, oh yeah, no, it's a big old hunk of glass, and then he realized, oh shit, all of her jewelry is completely useless.

It's a fig If he really was the thief, he wouldn't have stole any of that stuff. He would have realized that it was all glass and it was all just completely complete garbage. I mean I love that kind of stuff. And the way, you know, you mentioned val Avery and how yeah you kind of forget that he's there. But I think they did a good job of like showing Kylie on TV and then you cut to the bar and there's Val Avery and he's making it kind of a scene with his girlfriend, his squeeze whatever she is.

She wishes she was my wife. Yeah, boy, yeah, I really wish I was married to you. The guy who spends more time in the jug than than out of it. Yeah, I mean he's in the bar every time we see him for the most part. Yeah yeah.

The only time we don't see him is when he's at his apartment. Oh wait, that's not his apartment. Talk about one of the best twists. I love this. This twist is up there with suitable for framing for me.

When it's like, no, sir, this is my apartment. I signed the least this morning. Oh that's the moment of like, that's the moment where the shit hits the fan and it's like two minutes more. The end of the episode, it's it's great. Like the way Columbo catches Richard Kylie in this episode is pretty good.

And and the fake outs are are a lot. There are a fair amount of them in this episode. Like we mentioned with the chlorine, like we mentioned with the diamond ring, like or I guess the glass ring, the cubics of coranium even maybe like those things are fake outs, but they're they're executed all the way to the end, like they go all the way with them. They don't pull any punches. It's not like, oh, well, we'll mention this thing and then not mention it again.

Not only they mention it, then we have the scene of Colombo going and investigating it. Yeah, and I don't need that every time, but I appreciate it when they do it, and they did it really well here. Yeah, the whole thing with him going to the use car salesman, I like that, and pretty much is just like there is a lot going on in this episode, Jesus. I mean, yeah, you're right ninety four minutes and for me, I'm curious what your take is on this. For me, nothing's wasted.

But what was the scene that was getting to you? It's after he goes and meets Richard Kylie's wife. And then it's just like him aimlessly wandering around in his car for a while, and we like watch him in the neighborhood and they like stops in his car. It's it's the gag of getting his car to break down again. It's like, I don't know, why is this what I thought it was so he could like see if he could see or if he could go in the house fast enough.

And that did actually be the case that the woman that the wife of Richard Kylee wouldn't see, but it wasn't that. It ended up being just a gag to get his car to break down again, which worked really well. At the opening of the episode that for me is one of these like iconic now for me Columbo moments of him. I couldn't figure out what the fuck he was doing, even when the door was open, and it's like, oh, I lost my cigar. And then he's like, and this is the commissioner's car.

It's like, Wow, it answered the question I was wondering. The moment he answered he says like, this is the commissioner's car is like, oh, he does know Colombo, Okay, because that's the question you have immediately when it's a cop it's like, does Colombo know them? Is Colombo where that they exist? And like yes, And I think for me, that's the other really smart choice of the episode is making it someone that at least knows who Colombo is by first name, at least we don't have the opportunity to read the scripts for every Colombo like we did for Colchak. We read retty much everything, but with Colombo, it's like, yeah, once you get to like season eight, so you get a couple season ten, you get three episodes.

Season three, there's one script that I have available to me, and that is a friend, Indeed's script. So it was great to be able to compare this. But I have to say they followed Peter Fisher's script so exactly. They did a really good job. The only thing that I noticed that was different was there was a line about somebody get Colombo, and they said, oh, we had to send a car for him, so there's more about the car stuff in there, and then the car pulls up and then he gets out and does that.

I think it worked better with the way that they shot it, where we just are introduced to Colombo. What sixteen minutes in before the second murder even takes place. I mean we've been talking a lot. I mean the entire time we've done Chabby Detective. When does Colombo come in?

What does he know at that time? We've seen him come in before a murder has taken place, like the any important storm. He is there and the woman comes in, who's the boy? The girlfriend of the brother, and so he is tipped off to this stuff before he ever gets the call to go out to the vineyard and find out this stuff. So, yeah, we've had him introduced before, like there's a dead body, though I think the body is probably dead by that time.

But yeah, this was the first time where we have him coming out here. First time we have a body already on the scene. First time he's going against one of his own, a fellow police officer. Yeah. I really like how they are playing with the form in this, and this really gives me hope as far as okay, you can do a lot of different things with Columba, because a few times this season it's like, Okay, then this is gonna happen.

Then this is gonna happen, Then this is gonna happen. It's always fun watching how Faulk plays it. But this really played with the form for me, and that's why I also really enjoyed the episode because there there's some interesting things going on that are a typical of the show we've seen up until this point. Also mention to me, Michael maguire is kind of sympathetic as a character. Oh yeah, which is interesting.

I mean Richard Kyle's Halprinan is not. I mean, this guy is like, he's it seems like he's looking I mean, like you mentioned, he's looking for a reason to kill his wife, clearly, but I also think he's just looking for a reason to kill somebody because to be fair, like awfully comfortable around dead bodies too. Like the question I have is how did this guy become Commissioner of Race? Like, holy shit, the moral compass on this guy to say it's pointing in the wrong direction is to undersell it. It's pointing in the wrong direction, and he's following it with glee because the yeah, like you mentioned already, the the the speed and efficiency which with which he is able to create the idea of we're going to frame this guy and you're gonna be fine.

And then not only that, but I'm gonna quid pro quoet and you're gonna help me when I kill my wife. Yeah, Like this is he's probably the worst character we've gotten on this show so far because on top of everything else, he doesn't even kill anybody until the second act of the episode, but all the terrible stuff that he's doing, like it it justifies and explains why he's going to kill his wife. Oh, because he's just a bastard like through and through. Oh yeah, well, at least with Michael McGuire, his character kills out of passion. You know he's having any arguments.

Yeah, squeezes her neck too hard. I mean, yeah, he's a murderer. I'm not trying to say like it's excusable, but it is very much crime of passion, whereas what Kylie is doing is so premeditated, Like that is the definition of premeditation. It is wild. It's like comparing Jeffrey Tomer and like a jilted lover, right, Like one of these people is just sitting there just like enjoying it, and the other person probably would never kill somebody else if they were given an opportunity.

Again, like it's crimes of passion. Exist in that moment of uncontrollable emotion, right, and we don't really see it in the episode. So again we just have to take the Michael McGuire character at as his word. But I like the idea of a sympathetic villain in this show because that's the reality. Like these kind of things do happen, Like people die every day, and sometimes they die in crimes of passion.

There are even laws and rules against it in terms of crimes of passion, how they're persecuted, how they're prosecuted, how they're defended, how the people go to jail for it, so it's an understood thing in the criminal justice system. I like that this episode is like, Okay, it's not him that's the problem. So much like in a lot of ways, I wonder if Richard Kylie had said, like the best thing for you to do is just go admit it and move on. I think this guy would have. I think Michael McGuire would have.

But again, like you mentioned, like Richard Kylie's just mister burns in waiting for somebody, somebody that he knows to kill somebody, like tinting his fingers and waiting. That's what it feels like and I mean that is the case, but that's why he's such a good villain. I think the villains in this show that I really resonated with are the ones that are just like bastards through and through because they're having the best time. Like, yes, Johnny Cash is great, he's pretty sympathetic, but Robert Cope, Richard Kylie like Cheese, these dusers, and I mean in a lot of ways, maybe not playing it at the same level, but like a Donald pleasance as well, is like enjoying the fact that he did this because he's gaining something from it.

This is really a great entry into the show. You mentioned val Avery, and I do like that he has. This is a substantial role. He's not just renting a boat to Suzanne Pluchette. But the other person who's in here is our good friend Arlene Martel.

She's back again, and this time she's actually on screen, because the last time she was supposed to be around was I think the double Exposure episode, the Subliminal Message one where she plays Tanya Baker and she's only talked about and never actually seen. But here we get to see her one more time, and that's when Colombo. I can't even remember why he goes, Oh he's going in to talk about the jewelry stuff. And while he's there, while he's at the jewelers, Uh, yeah, I need a new band for this watch, right, it's a really good watch. You know, I've had this for a few years, you know.

Oh yeah, that'll be twenty five dollars. No, no, I don't need the new the watch. I just need the bath. I love Colombo so much as just a character like he he really is like one of the like Semino pop culture detectives as far as I'm concerned, Like he's just it's pretty much just Peter Folk, which I think anybody who watches this show and loves it like you do, and I'm I'm coming to and I obviously have a lot and enjoyed what we've wanted. Like it's so much just him that like not that they don't make him like this anymore, but like people aren't doing this thing anymore the way that Peter Falk was where it's like I'm gonna work on this show and I'm not even sure I like it, but I'm going to give it everything that I have.

Like we know and have heard of through plenty of news, you know, entertainment news things. How many shows die because nobody's committed to it. And we know that Peter Faulk in a lot of ways was his commitment to the show varied. But I don't think he ever phones it in, even when I think, even when I think he might be wanting to, Like, he's just so goddamn good in this show. And I know we say it like every episode and it shouldn't come as a surprise anymore.

But every time I watch a new episode with him, I'm like, and he just gives you something else, some other little thing different. Yeah, he's he's great. I excuse me, man, I didn't mean to scare you, Like, oh Jesus Christ can't take this guy anywhere. And I'm wondering, I have a question for you. Are those pictures at the end just pictures that he found somewhere and he's passing off as his niece and nephew because like again, like so, is Columbo just renting the apartment just to rent it?

Or is he kicked or does he just live in his car and he has no family? Like just making it all up. Yeah, I feel like he has been this whole time, and this episode where he is kind of screams to me like divorce dad energy, like he's he's like, you know, like he underwear, he moved in his his T shirts, he moved in everything. Yeah those yeah, yeah yeah, Rachel Blade Runner. Yeah, he's just like, oh, this is my backstory, yeah, because you created it that way.

I always wonder, like, I mean, is Colombo for real? I never know, But the point is you don't know, which is how he's able to navigate around these criminals. So defintely is they have no idea what to make of him, except for Richard Kylie, who should have known better, like of all the people man, So I'm saying, like, this guy's a big dummy. He's smart, but he is ultimately like the biggest dummy we've seen. Oh yeah, he should have been Like, well, I need Ricky Brockman to come in here and he can do this whole murder investigation.

Keep Columbo the fuck away from me, Like I'm gonna go kill my wife and like San Luis Obisbo or something or like in the middle of Bakersfield, just so I don't have to have Colombo come out and deal with it. It'll be the local cops, not the LAPD. Yeah, the old James l Roy Special. Yeah, I get the Sheriff's department exactly. Yeah, I don't cat the cops get the Sheriff's department.

But that's but that's the thing, Like, like we've said, like with Colombo being just the powerhouse of a character that he is, it's hard for me to believe that the police commissioner wouldn't know what his deal is. But yeah, I love how I love how dastardly he is, and I love how much Peter Falk in this episode specifically, I don't feel like I could. I don't feel like I know immediately when he shows up that he knows. I think it takes him quite some time in this episode to get to the point where he has quit it to other more or less. Yeah, I'm trying to think of what the first clue is that he might see.

I mean, it could be the nightgown under the pillow. I think the door handle is the first thing. I think He's like, why are these handles? Like didn't you like dust these handles? And they were like nothing.

It's little things that just keep adding up and adding up. And I love to the whole thing where he's like, I can't fill in this report. Yeah, I'm still working on it. There's a few things because I think I was doing that and saying that it's the captain who's on his ass, you know, and it's like, oh, I got a just a few more questions. You know, you got to fill in all these things for his report.

This time it's like, ah, sorry, Commissioner, I can't get you this report. I'm still working. It's still a few things just not adding up for me. I love it, yah know. He's Columbo's great in this episode.

I mean, I think Richard Kylie's great too. And I also really like I mean again, I like the idea of having a third party, the val Avery character who has his own autonomy and machinations here because he's just as our friends in Barney Miller know, he's just a thief. He ain't no murderer, which they see plenty of in Barney Miller. Like most of the time, the people that are being booked in the twelfth are just common criminals or people who have problems with grammar, and here it feels that same way where it's like, okay, like normally Colombo is brought into these things, and he's brought into it, so there's a person you can point at and be like, this is the person here. I don't think he knows it's Richard Kylee for quite some time, like at least the halfway through the episode.

Could see that. I could see that. I tend to give Colombo the benefit of the doubt and think that he knows immediately. But I can see your point. I could see him not actually being able to add it all up until I mean it's still pretty early in the affair, but yeah, until that beginning of the second act.

Well, and again it's some of that like just too close to be able to tell, right because he's in the police, Like this guy's the police, can I mean, once it comes to the second murder and there's that whole like, oh, you saw him out of the uh from the helicopter and you knew that, oh okay, right hiding behind the car. It's a very interesting episode because again having a val avery character that has his own autonomy. There hasn't been a character like that yet who's like I didn't kill anybody, Yeah, like I didn't kill a single person and they're trying to pin this on me, like, no fucking way. I mean again, going to prison for murder is very different than being a common burglar. So I like that there's like an added steak and added complexity to all of this.

We've talked so many times before about Colombo when he knows somebody's innocent, like talking to the ant in the Suitable for Framing episode Kim Hunter, and he's just like, yeah, no, she didn't do it. And of course you know that that drives Ross Martin fucking crazy. What are you talking about now? Of course she did with this one. You know, it's like he talks to the guy from the used car lot who wants to eighty dollars for his car, which makes me laugh quite a bit.

Yeah, no, that's okay. I don't need to come in and see this other girl that you hooked up with when the wife of the guy was busy. That's fine. I know you're all set. Same thing with al Avery, he's just like, no, I don't think you're a murderer.

He just flat out no, no, I know you didn't do this. And then he's able to win the trust over because he has to have val Avery go along with him on this stuff. He has to be part of this dupe to get the commissioner up to the apartment and all this stuff. And I just love that. I love how Colombo has one file made up and just puts that fake address in there and he's like, you only two people that ever saw were me and you, and you came over here and you planted this evidence.

This is my apartment. I love that. So my question is, did when Colombo gives the information and let's help enunciate it, he knows or is that the final piece of confirmation that he needs. I mean, I think he knows, but yeah, that's that's the way that he's going to get him. The Michael Maguire character, I feel like he could be swayed into admitting what he did.

Richard Kylie has to be caught, like that's how that's how malignant of a shithead he is. He's like he has He's like Ross Martin. He has to be caught in the act. And it's like, that's the only way this is gonna happen, because this guy is going It's like in Strangers on a Train where Bruno refuses to say anything up until I don't know what you're talking about, and then his body involuntary lets us know, oh, by the way, he's he was in on it, and nothing this guy was saying was a liah was all the truth. I like that similarly here, like Richard Kylie up until the moment where it's like, there's nothing else to prove here, you can't do anything about this.

You have made it so and that is what it is. I love that. I do like that that kind of formula of this show that they've done a couple times, which is not letting Columbo have this twenty minute setup thing like this is all just like boom boom boom boom boom, episode's done, Like I think of the Miguel Farrar episode like two episodes ago, like that, the end of the episode takes like twenty minutes because they're like, well, he did it, and we're gonna take the sun out and then we're gonna give him time to wait and then we're gonna book him. Here. It's just like nope, we got this and this and this and that's it.

We got him, and he's just gonna admit it again. I don't know why he would admit it. Like I feel like you're the police officer. Like the first thing you do is lawyer the fuck up. And that's the thing.

Like, this is one of the few cases where'm like comb Columbo's kind of foils in this episode. I think Richard Kylie could still get away with it realistically, Like I don't. I don't think any jury is going to prosecute him easily. A lot of circumstantial evidence. I wouldn't be surprised if they got Michael McGuire to turn on him, to turn state's evidence.

Yeah, that's I mean, that's what I was thinking. I mean, that's the way I saw this playing out after like the two minutes or the two months after the episode. Is Michael McGuire's character is is kind of coerced or more or less feels guilty enough to admit it. But yeah, like it's funny because like I'm not saying, there's not a lot to pin it on Richard Kylie, but it's kind of just one thing. It's the one thing of he went to the address because again can't prove he has no proof that he murdered his wife.

The wife is dead, but he it's not like there's handprints or anything else. The only proof that she didn't die in the bath in the school is the bathtub. Yeah, but there is the evidence that he planted there, so that's a little bit more less than circumstantial. But yeah, I know what you're saying. And yeah, I could see them being like, hey, Michael McGuire, uh, we know you killed your wife, But the punishment doesn't have to be going over to like you know, sing sing or any of these types of places.

You could go to like the club, med prison and spend your time there. Yeah, if you turn stool pigeon, Yeah, it seems like a good deal to me. Yeah. And that's the thing. What's interesting about these two people murder episodes is they haven't really mined this dynamic the way that this episode did.

And I think that this is the most interesting way to do it because similar I mean similarly to Strangers on the Train, but also very different. Like you mentioned, the reasoning and the autonomy of each character is very different in each of the pieces. I prefer it here. I prefer it here only because they don't feel I'm not saying there, and I don't think the characters are flat and strangers on a train, But Strangers on a Train's tension kind of plateause at some point, and this just keeps going and going and going because we as the audience are in on it in both of these cases. But in Strangers on a Train, I just I think that there's in terms of the tension building and the interesting interactions, I think this does it a little bit better.

If we're talking about this kind of scenario of two people killing two ostensibly random people. Guy is the typical Hitchcock wrong man, and he has to prove that he's not the wrong man or that he is the wrong man, and he has to go out there and like he becomes the investigator. He's getting his fiancee involved in He's getting is what is his sister the Patricia Hitchcock character involved in it or sister in law, like getting all of these parties involved in trying to prove himself innocent, as opposed to having this dadlike investigator who can come in and just be like no, no, sorting it all out. Which I appreciate that, but I'm curious how you liked Strangers on a Train. So it's like, I think the second Hitchcock movie I've seen, I got no problem admitting that he's just one of the few directors I have not made time for.

I enjoyed it. I think it was pretty good. I think it was pretty good, and I think it was also interesting to compare and contrast it against this and that. And then there's what's funny is there's an episode of Tales from the Crypt that is very similar to both of these things. That it's again, you know, the whole third act of it takes place on a train and there's some intrigue as to who killed whom and how as the person who died who killed them and wine all that.

So I enjoyed it. I mean, again, it's definitely within my wheelhouse of the kinds of things that I like, and how the performances were fantastic. Yeah, I'm glad that you liked it. And I really liked that one. I especially like the Patricia Hitchcock character and how she becomes the stand in for the Teresa character because she's got the same types of glasses.

The use of the glasses I thought was really nice, especially the murder being reflected in them. I mean, it's not as as cool as Robert Culp's glasses in Colombo, but you know, it was definitely pretty nice. And yeah, when he sees Patricia Hitchcock and then you get the flame in her glasses, I thought that was really nice too. I was about to say, like that that whole picture in the glasses thing. They've done that on this show.

Oh yeah, yeah, Culpin Death lends a hand. Yeah, and then I think we also saw it on What Night Gallery where they did that with I think, so yeah, yeah, I like, I mean, I like it. I think that it's an interesting stylistic choice. And what's even more impressive is that it's done physically, Like this is not a digital This is not a digital thing by any stretch of the imagination. So it makes me even more impressed because I'm like, oh, okay, so you actually had to do this and double expose it and all that, Like yeah, that's Hitchcock has an eye for the thematic for sure, Like he knows, he knows just how to set and light things.

He's the master of suspense for reason. Oh yeah, Well, and then you get all those great double entendres and just that weird sexual attraction that Bruno has to guy and this guy giving it back, is he not? I mean, just yeah, all of that, and that it was based on the high Smith, and she's got homosexual characters like crazy in her books. And so I'm not sure. I've never read Strangers on the Train, but I would not be surprised if Hitchcock even pumped that up a little bit more just trying to fuck with the censors.

Yeah, I mean I was reading about the homo eroticism of it and all of that, and it's there. I don't think it's like, I don't think it beats you over the head with him, but it's it's there enough. Right. Robert Walker, the father of Robert Walker Junior, who we just saw in The Mind Over Mayhem, nice right, right right, I can totally see when I think about their faces, I'm like, oh, I can totally see that, especially run the eyes right. Yeah.

I you know, I'm glad I watched Strangers on a Train. What's funny is I I watched truly, madly, deeply, and in that movie they talk about Strangers on a Train, And I recorded an episode of that today, and we're recording this today, and it's like weird synchronicity for anybody that's interested. The episode of Tales from the Crypt that is a oh. It even says it's an homage to Strangers on a Train. It's the sixth episode of the fifth season, so comes pretty late in the show, and it's two for the show, and David Paymer plays the Guy Haynes character and Vincent Spano plays the Bruno character, and then David Pamer's wife is played by Tracy Lords of all people.

So but it's very much like a straight like homage to that, which is also then you know this is I think this is an homage to that, right, Like it's not. It's not a coincidence that this is the way that it is. I mean I was sitting there thinking strangers on a train, and Andrey actually was, oh, this is like strangers on a train, Like okay, good. And then of course we saw Farley Granger. He was that satanic figure that caused back pain in the Tales from the Dark Side episode.

Remember that. Oh yeah, yeah, he's great. I mean, you know, the setup of strangers on a train being so iconic. I mean, look, the idea of you get on a train and this person who's been following you asks you to murder someone that they know. It's a great setup.

It's a really good setup for a movie like and that's and it's also a great setup for form TV show or a feature length movie in this film's case, or feature length episode in this episode's case. Would be really good is if you get Billy Crystal and Danny DeVito to kill Ann Ramsey. That would be hilarious and make that Strangers on a train? Is that a thing? Yeah, let's throw Mama from the Train.

Oh, I didn't even know that. Oh wow, Okay, I mean never see I've never seen it. Is it worth watching? No, No, it's not. Yeah, didn't sound like it.

No, I mean Danny DeVito plays kind of a he's no Bruno because Bruno's so debonair, Yeah, and just kind of gets gets around and all this. Let's say Danny DeVito is developmentally delayed in Throw Mama from the Train. Yeah, yeah, good times. Robert Walker's great in the movie. Like he the way that he plays Bruno is so specific in a way that like I'm impressed that that's the choice that they made because it's a hell of a choice, and I think it's a really good one, which is he's not mustache twirling, like he's just there that scene of guy playing tennis and all the heads are moving back and forth, but Bruno's just staring at guy that whole time.

Yeah, all the heads are moving, but his being still makes it even Repierre well. And also when he goes to the father's house to tell him and he turns the light on him there, he's just sitting there because he knows, because he knew he was getting double crossed. He is that guy. Yeah, he's so good. I loved the movie.

It was fantastic, and yeah, primarily because of their performances, Like I haven't seen enough Hitchcock, which is clearly the case, and it's kind of depressing. Robert Walker died like two years after Strangers on a Train came out, Like what a what a shame? What an actual what an actual shame? Because that that, for me, I think is the thing that I was surprised by is again having not seen a lot of Hitchcock movie. Some of these actors I've seen in other things, but like Hitchcock gets the best out of everybody, Like it's I mean, he sounded like a pretty pain in the ass as a director in terms of like Tarantino type, like I'm no phones on set, we're doing the thing.

But I can kind of respect that, Like, we're doing the fucking thing. So we're doing the fucking thing, and that's what we're here to do. And look, I mean the performances he get out of he gets out of these actors are widely considered to be their best performances in this move and Strangers on a Train. So I think that speaks volumes to the ability of Hitchcock as a director, regardless of the problems he had as a person and the way he handled himself. No, he was a real piece of shit in real life, but I love his work.

I mean he's kind of like Polinski, Like I love Polanski's movies. Guy was an asshole or is an asshole in real life. But yeah, if you don't mind me being your Hitchcock some somalier, allow me to recommend Rope where you get another really good performance from Farley Granger, but you also get John John Dall and then Jimmy Stewart is a fantastic guice. Yeah, yeah, will you be my Shirpa up the mountain of Hitchcock? Is I will?

I would be more than happy to. I believe I'm watching torn curtain here in the next couple of weeks, which is as a that's a Hitchcock one, right, it's a Hitchcock one. But it's let's see it less our Hitchcock and Julie Andrews and Paul Newman. I mean, I mean, can't be that bad, right, que me a month from now? It was in fact that bad.

That's the thing I mean. I don't know much. I mean, I have never spent time looking at Hitchcock's movies. And the only thing I said, like I said, I only thing I know about him is he treated the women on his sets pretty poorly. So that's all I know.

And other than the fact that his movies are widely considered to be some of the greatest films ever made in terms of the genre he was making them in. But yeah, I I have not seen enough. And Rope I know is the Rope is definitely on that list, because that's isn't that the case of the fucking ven Zetti BENZEDI another guy? Right? It's not Socco and Venzetti, It's more Leopolden lob Leopolden low.

Okay, Yeah, getting my murderers confused. Soako and Venzetti were anarchists, I believe, right, yeah, and Leopold and Loeb were the thrill killers as seen in the film Compulsion. I believe with another huge talent Orson Wells was their lawyer in that movie, and I want to say it was teen Stockwell and I can't remember who the other guy was. I'll watch any and all Hitchcock at this point because, like I said, I haven't seen enough. But yeah, this movie is good and totally justified as something worth watching.

In relation to this episode, I think if you've seen this episode and you haven't seen Strangers on a Train, it would, as we say, behoove you to do so. I wanted to ask, since we're coming to the end of the episode and this is the end of the third season, what has been the episode of the season that resonated with you the most coming back through this watch through together, the one that resonates with me the most of all Columbos any old Port in a Storm. I mean, it still stands up for me. It's still just the pinnacle of Colombo for me. You made that great point about the mustache twirling or like the really like out there villains, you know, the ones that are really doing a great job, and poor Donald Pleasants kind of gets thrust into this position as a murderer, but he's also loving it.

He can now order all the wine he wants. He's just living on borrow time. Basically, I don't think he's going to get away. He thinks he's going to get away with any of this stuff because at some point, those chickens are going to have to come home to roost and he's gonna have to start paying for all this stuff that his brother was warning him about. But Adrian Christina was just having a good time, and Donald Pleasance blowing up at those guys in the restaurant is still one of my favorite things.

How about you, Chris, what was the best and maybe even the worst moments of season three for you? I think think for me, the pinnacle moments for me are Johnny Cash being in the show, which just like, I mean, I know that that was just the last episode, so I kind of it's a little unfair. But I also think like Johnny Cash makes such an impact on this show that if you asked me, if you ask me quee up four years from now or whatever it is, if you ask me at the end of this show or whenever we finish, what episodes will stand out and what characters are gonna stand out. I'd be surprised if I still don't say that Johnny Cash character. I know that there are gonna be plenty of fantastic villains from here until the end of the show, but Johnny Cash is Johnny Cash's in a lot of ways.

I'll quote John Cusack from High Fidelity. He's in fucking Colombo. It's you know, it's like, who to fucking thunk it? Of all people, Johnny Cash and Colombo. I also, I mean, obviously the Donald Pleasant episode is fantastic.

I really like how good of a villain he is. I mean I also mentioned I think for me, I enjoyed Mind over Mayhem a little bit more than I think you did. So I liked Miguel Farrer or I guess not Miguel Jose. Jose, Yeah, the Emperor of the Known Universe. He's great.

There. I will say this season, maybe the lacking has been the people dying have been kind of unmemorable for the most part, Like we've had some We've had some people die on this show that are like okay, like this is a rather well known character actor, they give him a lot of time. I think it's indicative of how this season is treated the people that die in that the first person to die in this episode is already dead and it's played by an uncredited actress. So I don't know that. For me, I feel like this season has been about some killers that are really lightening it up.

But like Mickey Spalane was one of the victims, and they did like nothing with him at all. I mean the episode, the episode that you've talked about already with Donald pleasants like his brother doesn't do shit. For the most part. He has one antagonistic, antagonistic scene and that's it. I think for me, maybe the best victim this season.

But again, and this guy is like the whistling idiot of them all is Martin Sheen the first episode we watched where it's just like, dude, the worst thing you could do is what you did, and you d went and did it anyways, So he's the standout victim. But I think, yeah, this has been a very strong season killer wise, but victim wise, it's been kind of weak, and I don't think that's necessarily always going to be the case, but this season seems like they definitely weren't phoning it in for the killers. Well, yeah, I'm excited to talk about season four with you. And before we do that, I think we should announce a very special episode. On the next special episode of The Shabby Detective, we're going to take a little bit of a break and jump forward in time and we're going to be talking about one of the great comedies of the twenty first century.

Chris, you want to say it? Oh, it's Corky Romano baby. Fuck. Yeah, it was the film that introduced me to Aha, And no, I'm not kidding, and you know exactly what I'm talking It's take on me is in that movie in like a pretty substantial way, right if memory serves. It's been a long time since I've seen it, but I just remember it so fondly.

And we got mister Falk in there, and I'm super excited to talk about it with you. Peter Falk playing I believe Peter Berg, Chris Penn, and Chris Katan's dad. He is the father to all three of these people, Which of them is the most unbelievable. We will get to when we get to the episode but I don't think Chris Katan is going to be the answer. I don't know what universe Chris Penn comes out of Peter Fulk, but yeah, he's gonna need a C section, definitely.

Yeah. I'm excited to rewatch Corky Ramano. I think, like yourself, it's been decade plus. I don't know why kind of forgot it existed, But now that we're doing this, it feels like the perfect time to go back to Colombo meets Chris Katan in Corky Romano for whatever reason, Well, until we do that, Chris, what are you up to these days? Working on podcasts and all sorts of interesting stuff over at Weirdingwaymedia dot com, where the things that I work on can be found a lot of other fantastic shows like eighty TV Ladies, Feminine Critique, Twisted and on Corked, your Show, The Projection Booth, all great shows that can be found out weirding Way Media, and I have effectively nothing to do with them, which means they're fantastic on their own, which I'm super proud of.

So I just get to be proud of everything that everybody else makes. So weirding Way Media is where you can go to listen to this show and so many other things. What about you, Mike reading much the same thing. I'm not on any of those other shows either, except for the projection booth, but yeah, we're doing great work over there. People should come on over to weirdingwaymedia dot com and check out the shows because some good stuff.

Thank you so much to John Walker for a theme song, thank you to Colin Gallagher for our end theme, and thank you to everybody for listening. Please continue to listen, go ahead, rate and review the show wherever you get it. That would be greatly appreciated. And until then, we will see you next month with some more Peter Falk goodness in power, Powers, anything, No