241: A Dark Day at the Mall

All right, so here I am at the mall. I told the guys, you know, we were going to have our Suncoast reunion here. We'd meet up and talk about the old store. What the hell is that horrible music? What?

What? What the hell is this? Hey, guys, hey, what the fuck is this? Why are these jeans $ 90? These look like regular jeans.

Ah, screw this. Let's just go to your house, Patrick. Due to the fact that our previous employer, the mall-based video store, was replaced by an overpriced clothing store, this series of episodes is dedicated to the memory of the fallen video store. Specifically the one in our cheesy mall and all the weirdos that used to shop there. And the fact that the store sort of dug its own grave along the way.

Anyway, rest in peace, Suncoast. The following feature has been rated R by the Motion Picture Association of America. It is intended for mature audiences and parental discretion is advised. It's showtime, folks. Enjoy the show.

Our nuclear reactor pumping out one million kilowatts of power. Are either one of these any good? I don't watch movies. I love the smell inside the Hollister. Do you?

It's what teenage pheromones smell like. I thought it smells like the inside of a $ 14 magazine. magazines i can't afford anymore they all smell like the inside of hollister and i can't hear you know. I can honestly say i've never been inside hollister i went in to look at it because i wanted to see what because i mean that's the sad part is i get in there and i still see it like the layout of our i mean it's totally stripped and new crap thrown up there and like stupid posters of shirtless. Dudes, but it was, yeah, it was weird. Spring break floor set.

You remember where the microfiche is? Yeah, I still tried to look stuff up there and they were like, sir, get out from behind the counter. Like, but I gotta look for this copy. I gotta get a special order. Would you like an Entertainment Weekly subscription?

How can I get nude yoga if I don't special order it? Just a Dishnet station. Yeah. See, I have to say, though, we made Netflix happen. We did make it happen.

Think about that. We also probably put ourselves out of business along the way. But, like, we are the reason it all came together. In retrospect, yeah, Netflix was a big deal. And we were kind of the first people doing that.

I don't know anybody that was. I mean, you would see the stupid things show up in magazines. They had their little cards in those $ 14 magazines. But, like, I don't ever remember anybody, like, talking about it except for us. Right.

Or, like. Five or six years like and then slowly like everybody was like oh yeah i've got netflix but i remember in the beginning like people didn't know what you were talking about i hated the mail mail in movies what. Are you an idiot it was gonna take weeks for these movies you know you. Have to go to a store and pay 39 for a new release or you know across the street to your house same parent company and get it for half price but you know But they will leave their bastard child soon. But now you just have to pay $ 90 for a pair of jeans. $ 90 a pair of jeans.

It's so dark in there. I know, that's part of their marketing, I think. I wouldn't mind taking a peek at what kind of pants they have. I can't see. It's like a little, like I say, like a spring break haunted house or something.

It's very strange and spooky in there. That's what I'm saying. And I think that's got to be the marketing is like if we blind them so they can't see the bad clothing and then we deafen them with this horrible like disco track going on. Like they'll be so, yeah, they'll be so like out of the loop and they'll be so discombobulated. They'll just be like, they'll stumble up to the register with a stack of like $ 400 worth of clothes and And we'll just run their card through.

Like, I'm pretty sure that's how it works. It's ironic that they want it so dark, considering, like, their methods of hiring. That they want these very pretty, very attractive, you know, employees, and then they put them in the dark. Yeah, it's kind of mean. The spotlight's on the clothes, and it's...

You know, you go out of your way to have, you know, very attractive people, and then you have them hiding in dark corners. You know what Suncoast didn't have? Very attractive people. What are you talking about? This studly crew we've got here?

We were ugly, and the lights were on us. We had our cliche walking sex employee. Hey, hey, don't talk about yourself like that. Come on. No, no, no.

That's uncalled for. Or John, whatever. Man, that boy brought the girls to the yard. That is for sure. seriously like we needed like a wolf ball bat or something it's like every couple hours you would look at him and there would be two or three girls that just would not leave him alone like even if he went waited on a customer they would just sit there and wait for him to come back. Sweat for us to drink.

If only we could have sold that we'd still be around no. Doubt gotta take him reservations on his sweat. Oh, wow. So we're midway into these stories. I guess we should say hello.

What's up? Welcome to Movie Meltdown. I am Brian. And as you heard from the cheesy intro there, we're doing something a little different this week. We're having our, you know, our movie geek reunion.

I'll go with reunion. Reunion we're going to go with. I'd say family reunion. We're kind of family at this point. Has it been 13 years?

You do the math. I don't want to, really. I remember being there for 9-11. That's how I really track it. I remember working that morning because everyone, since we had TV, everyone in the mall came to our place to have us turn on the news.

So it had to be 2000. That's a long damn time ago. Let's not think about that part. So, yeah, to introduce you guys, that would be David that was just talking there. Hello.

If we want to do backstory, the store that we worked at together wasn't the first time I met you because you were at the other store I worked at. And, hell, you were still like a teenager at that point. And I'm like, this kid has the best Laserdisc collection I've ever seen. You would come in and special order Laserdisc to the point that I didn't know your name. I'm that kid that spent $ 120 on that Akira special edition from Japan and was giddy about it.

You couldn't convince 120 Akira on Laserdisc. Only downhill since then until Leo remakes it. You couldn't convince kids now. I love Japan. I love your appropriate pronunciations, but I can't wrap my head around that.

You grew up with Kaneda. That's the way it should be. Yeah, I need Kaneda just so I don't think of, oh, Canada, every time. And he's even wearing red. That's what made it worse.

Instead of the pill on his back, I just imagined the maple leaf. It's like, oh, come on, please. Can we just fledge this one a little? Just say Kaneda, please. No, no.

Yeah, I don't think you can convince kids now. Like, think of it now. Like, they're lucky to spend money on a Blu-ray, period. Like, when you can just watch everything on Netflix or just download it from God knows where. So, I'm like...

It's called thepiratebay.com. Thepiratebay.com. Unless they send me money, I'm not plugging them at all. So, I don't... Yeah, I don't think you can convince kids.

Like, I don't think they could wrap their head around the fact that not only did you pay money for a movie. I think we're still out. I think if Avatar The Last Stairbender would get released, hey, I'm that kid. That cartoon was good. It was, actually.

If they would release it on Blu-ray, I would drop $ 100. I would drop $ 100. See, box sets I can see. Like, box sets, I mean, people were still doing that all the way up through, like, they were shelling out money for The Sopranos right and left. So it's like, I can still see people doing box sets.

But, like, to think about one movie for well over $ 100, because I can't. came pretty close. I know I spent a good $ 79. 99 on one or two at least, so I don't know. If I got to the... Did he see Akira?

Is he, like, missing out on what Akira actually is? I mean, we're talking Tokyo 3 here. I don't know. I don't think you could convince people the world that we once lived in. Only old people listening now are just like, yeah, I remember those times.

Man, I'm not trying to tell us, but I think we... I think we saw the future a little bit there. I mean, I remember people making fun of it for the size. I mean, because, come on. Which one?

LaserDisc? LaserDisc is a big DVD. You know, it's the same thing. When that transition happens, a digital format, man, I was all about it. I was like, you don't understand.

Like, this quality is not going to decrease. We can take a food break if you'd like. We've gotten sidetracked on food. Yeah. Folks, it's intermission time.

So how about taking a break? Get out and stretch a little and relax before the show begins again. And why not make it refreshment time, too? We have lots of tasty, delicious treats waiting for you at the refreshment center. There's hot popcorn, so golden good and fresh out of the popper.

And all kinds of refreshing ice-cold soft drinks. Sizzling hot dogs just bursting with juicy goodness. Ice cream so smooth and delicious, you'll hanker for more. Plus, all the most popular candy bars and many other favorite treats. So why not visit the refreshment center now?

Neo Tokyo is about to explode. Streamline Pictures presents a state-of-the-art adventure, Akira. Dave, I do not get superheroes. Oh my god, I don't get you. What don't you get?

Towerbot here. Well, the meatbags were going to say that if you're a geek and like podcasts, then you could try Tower of Technobabble at www.toweroftechnobabble.com. Then this started. Well, it's up to you. I'm gonna get my taser and put a stop to this.

Towerbot out. Okay, monkeys, it's nap time. We've all got quirks. I've got them. You've got them, Dave.

That's what makes this character so, so compelling. Thumbs up from me. Same here. This is Dean Cameron, also known as Chainsaw, and you're listening to Moving Up Down. Moving Up Down.

I'm Chainsaw. I'm Dave. We'll see you at the movies. Scorpion and. Selena, please.

Melina. Sadly, I don't because my video game knowledge is lacking. Which was my favorite part about selling games for years there. I'm like, I don't play this shit. I mean, yeah, that's a great game.

At least movies, I can make shit up. Games, I'm just like, I don't know, really. Man, I was trained at GameStop. Trained to say it's the greatest game on the planet. Straight up said to you, he's like, if you've never played a game, it does not matter.

You go, this game is so good. I can't put it down. Dude, when I get out of work. See, that's how it's changed. 2004 rugby, can't put it down.

That's how it's changed. Cannot put it down, dude. Me and my bros, rugby all night long. Oh, my God. See, that's why, like, that's probably why I got out of it, although I fucking probably ended up back there before I know it.

But I was just like, I couldn't fucking deal with that, like, bullshit that you have to do to be like, you've got to be Joe's salesman. And I'm like, I don't make enough money to stand here and bullshit people all day long. Like, I'm just here to ring people up. That was my job. Register monkey, you know?

I'm like, that's really all we were there to do. I'll put shit away, I'll ring people up, but I'm not here to, like, sell. They put so much weight on under associates. It's like, you know, you have all these people that are in control of what you carry and how much it's going to cost, you know, and all the things that really matter. Yet they put so much grind on the associates to make it happen.

It's like, dude, I'm the lowest on the totem pole. I'm on the bottom. And you're grinding on me to be the one that makes so much money for you. Yeah. Well, that's what I was.

And like, even in the last days of Suncoast, that's what killed me is I'm like, you guys are making the worst decisions in the world up here. And then you put all the responsibility on us. Like. Okay, we're going to buy on to six different companies that we're going to be involved with. And then I want you to pitch these six things to every motherfucker in line.

Let's go do this real quick. Special orders. Reservations. Come on. We're back on track here.

Entertainment Weekly. Thank you. Selling batteries. Dish. Batteries.

Oh, I forgot about the batteries. Battery contest. Had to sell a storage unit. Had to sell a disc doctor. A disc doctor.

Blank tape. Remember blank tape? We had, like, contests on blank tape. Oh, my gosh. And I was dumb enough to buy one, and it ruined my copy of Tomb Raider.

It doesn't do anything. Not Mummy Raider. Tomb Raider. Mummy Raider, I wouldn't chance. Of course.

I want to say that there was nine things. I want to say, you know, because, again, having to fill out that paperwork every night. Dishnet, Netflix. Special orders, reserves. Entertainment Weekly, Batteries, Storage, Dish, Netflix.

We're at seven. Did I miss anything? Probably. It was too much. And considering that every single one had its own ratio, everyone was like, You know, one in three sales, one in seven sales, one in five sales.

And you're expected to push all of them. Right. I'm like, by number two, the person is annoyed and they're not going to come back anymore. So you're just shooting yourself in the foot. There was one time the DM was in the store.

And this was like end days kind of stuff when, you know. Oh, yeah. We're getting grinded on. I remember that. And it was an amusing meeting with her in general.

But it got to where she essentially was like doing a thing. She's like, okay, I'm going to sit back and watch you do customer service. Oh, God. And so me being the ass I can be, I'm like, cool. I'm going to give you textbook customer service right here.

Watch how this goes. And so customer comes in. Hey, welcome to Suncoast. You know, are you curious about Dish Network? You know, hey, if you need anything, let me know.

My name's David. Especially if you need an Entertainment Weekly subscription. So I let her do her thing. At some point, I approach her, mention batteries. She's like, okay, thank you, cool.

Have a lot of vibrators at home, do we? I approach her, you know, ask her if she's, you know, finding things she needs. You know, I can special order if not. She says, okay, cool. At some point, I approach again.

Hey, you know, we got storage units, too, if you need that. Now she's starting to get a little annoyed. She's like, I'm good. I'm cool. It is.

So I back up a little. At this point, I kind of take a halfway. I'm like, she's already sick of me. Yeah, she's getting pissed. But you're doing your job.

I'm like, okay, cool. Then we'll finish this. Here comes the finale. She comes to the register. Finishing move.

She's got her one or two movies. And I'm like, hey. Down, down, over, side, beat. So what can I special order for you? What didn't you find today that I can get for you?

She's like, no, I'm good. Cool, well, you know, we got some movies coming out. We got the new season of Sopranos coming out. You know, can I go ahead and reserve. A copy for you?

And if the disc is scratched, you could have a disc doctor. This is all I need, these two movies. Cool. So have you heard of Entertainment Weekly? Because I can get you three free months.

Could you please just ring me up? Fucking ring me up. So are you sure you don't need any batteries for your remotes or anything? Because I mean, can you please just ring me up? So did you understand how the Ditch Network program works?

Because I could talk you through that if you didn't understand it. Ring me up. So I have my manager and my DM standing right there looking embarrassed as hell. They should. And she angrily finishes the transaction and walks out.

And I turn and look at her and I was like, That was your textbook customer service. She is not coming back. And I don't blame her. That's ridiculous. I wouldn't want to come back to any place that did that to me either.

I would go back all the time. Yeah, but you're on crack. And possibly drunk right now. And that's true. So we didn't finish our little intro.

But yeah, years later, I remember after I veered away from Suncoast and unfortunately came back, I walk in the other store and I'll be damned if that weird kid that used to special or laser this wouldn't stand behind the counter. I was like, mother fuck, look, there he is. I guess it's all come full circle because I had that same response. I remember that first time I saw they were opening it up because the one in Jeff had already been there and I was like, why isn't there one over here? That sucks.

I worked across the street anyway and I go in and it's like, coming soon. Suncoast. I was just like, the answer to all my problems, which by the way, it wasn't. But I was just like, that's it. And then they were dragging their feet.

I was going to be there. There's no doubt about it. I'm going to be there. That guy that was running the store, I'm like, dude, what the hell is your problem? So I bugged the hell out of that manager, which, by the way, was our other guest uncle.

And that's how you got involved. Howard was the initial manager there. I pestered the hell out of him until he was like, look, I'm going to give this guy a job so he'll quit calling me and asking about it because he won't leave me the fuck alone. So he was probably sick of me quite a bit at that point, but he put up with me for years. He has a lot of love to give.

He does, actually. Howard's pretty awesome. And then, I don't know, 70 years later, whenever it was, you came wandering in. And actually, didn't he bring you in one day and was like, hey, look, it's Patrick. Give him a job.

And we were like... Do we have to? Look at this motherfucker. I didn't really understand what they were doing. You were like, what's a movie?

And the next thing you know, you're working there. I'm just like, motherfucker. So, so yeah, that's how we've all come together in this little group. It's, I mean, and they're all sectioned off because if you've been listening to the show, we've done these, I mean, Greg's been on the show most of the run of it. He was there with me at Clarksville.

He's been there with me, you know, for years. uh ben that we've had as a guest from tower technobabble worked with me at that same store the other dave not this dave uh we can do it like spice girl style dave c not dave l dave c was uh was one that was there when howard was there so he was there and opened the store with him and he's been he's been on many a time and and we'll be back if i have my way but Yeah, so there's little pockets of employees that work together. And technically, we were like the last run. We were there when that store closed. We were the one who hid the DVDs in the walls and ran them out the day before. I don't know anything about that.

If the company was still around, they'd be pissed. I paid for it all, thank you very much. I paid for most of it. There was a discount involved but you know i was entitled to my discount i'd worked there for years it. Was petty though wasn't it wasn't it like 20 or something oh i.

Think we're talking about they hide them in the walls until it's 90 because that's the discount that's. The discount i was that's how i got. My evil dead action figure set. Nice what was the weird promo that would happen it was like a refurbish thing that would happen every now and then where we'd get all these dvds in that i think were essentially like returns. I think that was towards the end too.

That they would be like yeah you know these are actually okay because i remember like getting a chunk of akira kurosawa criterion stuff. Yeah but dirt cheap cheap. Like you know we didn't used to get that i think that was something yeah i think that was a weird deal they started making at the end there because yeah actually now that i think about it i have a criterion brazil but it's like missing the first disc It's missing the regular movie. But you get, like, the two that you pay, like, $ 100 for, like the special edition and the other cut and the, like, all the, yeah. So I was just like, well, you can just buy, yeah, you can buy a regular version of the movie for, like, $ 15, and then I've got this Criterion extras for, like, $ 7.

99 or whatever it was. I was just like, yeah, I think I'll do that. I don't even love Brazil, but I'm like, for that, I'll take the Criterion version. Shit. Well, before we totally, I mean, if we're going to get knee-deep into our...

Our days back at the coast, if you will. Let's do it official-like. There's a props department. I feel like the value. Of this is...

Alright, here we go. Shit just got so real. Shit just got so real. Fuck yeah. We're set now.

Shit. Wow. I have my. West Coast vest on. I think it's been dry cleaned.

You guys are jealous? I know. It looks pressed. He's very proud of it. I've dusted off the four inches of dust that was on top of it before I brought it here.

You know the Nazis had pieces of flair they made the Jews wear. You know, you turn that inside out and it works out for your Han Solo outfit. I already have a Han Solo. But I went with the Empire version. The Empire outfit's better, if you ask me.

It is. But far worse. It's the brown pants. Blue jacket. Nice.

Sadly, I do. The carbonite outfit. I do have carbonite. That looks like his Snuggie. It was Han Solo's Snuggie.

It's kind of cold around here. I'm going to bring my Snuggie. Can you guys encase me in carbonite? It's a little chilly in here. I mean, it is coming up in the air.

It's chilly. It's windy. I'm going to bring a Snuggie. 1,000 years frozen in carbonite. Okay, so we've got the vest on.

It's professional now. So we're ready to roll. Do we want to... Dart, I feel like, I mean, we've done this segment before. It has been a while, but I guess it's time for the Movie Fan Freak Show.

Greetings, carnival robes, step right up and meet the freaks. This segment I specifically started because I, like from day one, I don't think I'd ever experienced people quite like I did when I worked there. I mean, there's a lot of weirdos in the world, don't get me wrong, but there's a very specific breed that is drawn to movies in particular. Maybe just all forms of media. I don't know if there's different ones that come in the music stores.

Maybe that has its own little version. Honestly, I've done food, I've done video games, I've done music, and I've done movies, and they all have a very weird niche percent of these customers that are just... Bizarre. Like, just surreal. Like, the kind of stuff you might see in, like, you know, some silly comedy.

You know, someone being, like, over the top. And you're just like, those people don't really exist. Or kind of lynchy and Sometimes you're like, these people are so damn quirky. The Klingons were legit. Yes.

Oh, the Klingon sisters. The Klingons. So, yeah, I figure we're going to roll into these characters. I think we should make some type of a top ten countdown. All right.

Do you have them ranked or do you want to generalize? I kind of think we should probably go generalized, but I have a ranking system in my mind. We have to go over all of them first and then decide the ranking. I don't even know if I can name ten. I'm going to pitch out number ten.

We're going to have to remind each other. I'm going to pitch out number ten. Okay. He started well before my time, back in the days of the Howard. But I do remember a special, special occasion with him.

He was more than a man. In fact, he was a mountain man. See, I've told the beginning version of this a long time ago. Actually, we have mountain man artwork. I had it commissioned by our...

Semi-resident artist. That's the sound of shit just getting real. I don't know if I have it on here. I know I have it. I have a version of The Mountain Man.

I only have one story of Mountain Man. All right. I've told my version, but yeah, I wanted to bring other people in. It might be the same story. And it was like many, many years ago.

So half those people are probably moved on and don't listen to us anymore. So go to town. I grew up basically hearing Legends of the Mountain Man, not unlike the Legends of Sasquatch, how he would every once in a while on Tuesday come down from the mountain to buy his new releases. That somehow he got government funding for because he would come in with an entertainment check. Yeah, why don't I get this, by the way?

I need an entertainment check. I feel like it can go much further with us than it would with him anyways. Oh, shit. I have it on here. One day.

Hold on. You're not going to want to wait. You're going to want to see it right now. I want to see it. Luckily, I've got the old system here, and I happen to have brought it.

So let me load it up here, and I'll turn it around for you. Shit is about to get real. I'm not sure if I had this guy. I remember a big, burly, hairy guy, but I don't know if we're. Talking about the same guy.

He was skinny, though. He was like super skinny. He was a little emaciated. Lots of hair, lots of jackets. And the Russian fur cap that was going on.

The cap was the money. Okay. Here is the mountain man. I love that this was commissioned. That is so accurate.

He even got the axe. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah, he had his own hatchet that he attached to it. Oh, that is so accurate. Oh, wow.

Wow. So I only had one interaction with said mountain man, and it's when he came in to the store on a Tuesday to get his new release, probably of Lara Croft Tomb Raider. Who wouldn't? The Cradle of Life. She is.

And I don't know if anybody else remembers, but Our movies were $ 19. 99 and sales tax made that $ 21. 19. Right. That's a bargain.

And he always paid in cash. As you do in the mountains. He handed up $ 21. 15. Or furs. $ 21.

15. And he searched his pocket. He knew he was off a little bit. And he became really kind of like emotionally disheveled at the fact that he wasn't going to have exact change. And, you know, I was young.

I was like, you know, if you have a buck, it's fine and I can give you change. Or, you know, it's four cents and I'm 15. I don't give a shit. That still holds true. By the way.

And it's like, I know you're coming next Tuesday. You can bring it then if you feel inclined. And he told me to wait and he reached into his shirt, which was unbuttoned a little bit, and... pulled out a necklace that at first I thought was an amulet, but it was some kind of Canadian currency with a hole punched in it and then the leather strap that he then ripped off and proceeded to pay with. He gave you his necklace? He gave the necklace, which I'm still not sure how to use that.

There wasn't one of the little, you know, predestined little coin slots for it, like quarters Canadian Rocky Mountain fur coin. But I'd like to start with Mountain Man. That seems like a good place to start. A true hero, if you will. I don't think I had this guy.

He was early on, so that's why, yeah. Like I said, I. Was there for the Deanna days. Like, I don't know if. Was Meltman still around?

I don't think so. I think he was gone by... That's why I don't know if... You may just be retelling this legend. I may just be retelling it.

Because I thought that was a Dave C story. It might be a Dave C story. This is how Suncoast works. It kind of is. It's built on bullshit.

And there's a mythology to it. You have to understand the. Did he use his hatchet to open his new DVDs? No, he bought that thing with the little razor blade in it, that little DVD. It's the one that we were supposed to add on to our pitch.

Oh, wow. He had a box cutter out of a piece of slate and some driftwood and some vines, and it was for opening his new releases. Now, he did have this. it was a dual action it was a hatchet that i'm sure he's killed many things people whatever with but in the in the handle of it it was also a pipe yeah that was pretty badass He was allowed in the mall with those? See, that's what I'm saying. This was a long time ago.

This was well pre-9-11. This was when St. Matthew's was the wild, wild west. It kind of was. This is when I would be able to jump in that fountain down at the food court with no repercussions.

And you did. I ripped off his necklace to pay for the rest of his DVD. I think that that's the sign of a man, actually. It's just something like, I feel like, Like he's going to come back for it later or something. Almost like it was like, you hold this.

You hold this. This is like his collateral. In 30 years, I will be back. It was like Indiana Jones giving you the hat and be like, I'm going to be back for this. I'm going to be good on his four cents.

You hold onto this hat. You know I'm coming back for this. That garage door is going to be closing one day and bam, there I am. He'll be back for his necklace. And before the break.

I just think that maybe this is something that Angelina Jolie should hear in know that somebody cared about her Cradle of Life film so much, they pay with their own jewelry. Or at least the last ten minutes. Who's the next one, Brian? Again, I had lost track of quite a few. I don't know which ones you want to save as the big grand finale here.

I want to kind of go, since you're talking about specific change, do you guys remember The Argentinian? Go on. Don't know that I do. I think we found our next one. I called her Dargentine.

I want to say we all called her Dargentine. The little Hispanic old lady. Yes. The little Hispanic old lady that we're pretty sure was somehow bootlegging for her, like, parole son. I think I do remember this.

Gangster son. I do remember. She would come in every new release day. Tuesday. It could be summer and she'd have some massive puffer jacket on trying to make her not look so emaciated.

And would pull out some list of movies on some scraggly piece of paper that her son probably filled out for her. And swaddled out of his anus. There's some reason she was not into these movies. It was clear these were not for her. And would make you...

She would get every new release. I really like some of those. Playmate of the Apes is classy. And. You had to ring each one up individually, which killed us.

Nice. Killed us because of all those things we had to sell and all those beverages. And it broke it down as to how many items per. I mean, there was always like a breakdown of like units per sale was supposed to be. But I had the Argentinian.

And like, yeah, you needed like a handicap or something. You'd be like, it's not my fault. She'd pull that baggie out full of change. Full of change. And would just reiterate over and over and over, I need you to ring this up separately, please, with every single one.

As you're doing it, I need this one separately, please. And would pay with the change out his baggie, exact change for every single one. And needed the receipt for every single one. And every time would act like you scammed her somewhere. Would just evaluate that receipt.

Oh, no, I can't, I can't. I do remember this, because I do remember her pouring over the receipt, and it's like, it's got one thing on it. How long do you have to look at it? And it paid with exact change. How did we scam you?

And most of the time, sometimes she would, depending on how heavy that new release day was, sometimes it would be like five, six, seven movies. But she had to be on the bus. Oh, yeah. She had a bus schedule, and she would freak out if you weren't ringing her up fast enough. I remember I forced her one time, like it was towards the end.

I think I'd already put in my notice. I made her pay for all them on one ticket. And I think she almost had an anxiety attack. Like I explained to her that I could, that the receipt is itemized, you know, whoever it is that might be concerned with these totals, you can see it all right there. Like I just essentially refused.

I just kept scanning them. ignoring her and i swear she got the twitches. What a panic attack was kicking in i. Think someone someone back at home might have might have hit on her a little bit for letting that. That's wonderful to hear yeah i do remember it is one of those things i think it must have been right at that timing because i think you did always get scheduled on that new release day because you i mean yeah we always kind of in you know depending on your position you would end up at that same schedule every week and I think that's what it was. I think you got stuck with her every damn time.

Poor baby. So that brings us to the end of our second customer, which I think is an opportune time to do what I'd like to call a little employee spotlight. Let's play a little Russian roulette with this. Would you all like to go seasonal hire or long-time employee? Let's say long-time employee because long time is going to be.

Really good. Yeah. Really good. I'm letting you guys go with these. I've tried to block out most of the ones that aren't here.

Seasonal employee, which I mentioned earlier. I had something I wanted to say, and I just can't wait. I'm going to start this one off. It's a two for one, but I'm only going to highlight one of them. We, at one point, hired two men, and they were obviously... present for the destruction of sodom and gomorrah one of them was a little bit taller a little bit thicker and one of them was a little bit littler a little bit skinnier and i'm gonna i'm gonna highlight our little cub for us i don't know if you remember him he had a shaved head with two little antenna sticking out and his stage name was.

Does this bring i believe so he was the very final run wasn't he i do remember him because wasn't this also the one that was kind of a little bit g a little g little g which. You didn't i was like that's the first time i think i'd seen a gg yeah i was like i've never seen somebody work together the g like rap persona with very openly kind of obviously gay i was just like this is An odd combination. I've seen a lot of different variations on this before, but never quite his. MC Juxtaposed. He was amazing, and it was from his other friend, who we later found out that they hated each other, because they were, of course, ex-lovers.

Which happens. That our little friend had a blossoming pornography career. I do remember hearing that. Oh, and it gets so much better, because we sold, or no, we didn't. He showed it to me on the internet, the DVD version, And it was a fairly intense gangbang in which men would line up next to a pool single file and ravage him and his little body.

And the highlight being that he would say things such as, oh, I won't get bleeped while I know. He would say things such as, hey, daddy, fuck me in my fart hole. Which was absolutely amazing. Hot. So we're going to bury that little pearl.

I'm going to fast forward a few years. At this time, I'm 15 years old when I meet. Judy. And now I'm 28. I live in Louisville, and I opened a, we'll just say, alternative medical clinic, which takes me to meet all types of interesting people and interesting situations.

I'm sure. One of them being an alternative healing festival that I attended. I would say that I got absolutely no clientele from it, but what I did find out was that our stay classy little friend is now a psychic medium. That, I guess, doesn't surprise me. Different haircut.

Lots more clothes that are professional. Wouldn't antennas help, though? No, yeah. Exactly. But yeah, he came up to me and I was like, fuck me and my fart hole.

Where did he come from? And that has been a Suncoast Employee Spotlight. On to number eight. Wow. There's still so many.

I feel like we're all just kind of like playing poker a little. We're all kind of sitting on our cards like, which card? Big Mama. Oh, I remember Big Mama. Yeah, that was one of those ones.

I got a picture of Big Mama paying with her cleavage money. Nice. I was going to say, man, I took many dollar bills soaked with boob sweat. Many dollars. Man, she just... reach in there and pull out anything and change oh no doubt i think like lefty had changed righty had the bills like i'm pretty sure one of them jingled a little We have the photos here.

I was so blatant with the flash and everything. See, let's, okay, yeah, we have to clue you guys in, because for many years at the Old Sun Coast, these just were a legend, and we would just, we would pass these on. And things like the Mountain Man, I had to commission a version so that we would have a visual. Like, I had to go and, like, I gave her a description. I'm like, no, really, here's... this i named i wrote down this like detailed description of everything she had to get in there he's got to be wearing this giant fur hat and so yeah i did i described all that and that that's how we got that awesome artwork which i guess we'll have to post on the facebook page now so you better be our friend on facebook but um yeah then a generation or two later in the in the run of employees a certain mr patrick comes along who decided to take it up a notch if you will and um He invested in a little camera.

I believe they were digital at that point, right? It was the first era of digital. Sony CyberShot 3.2 megapixel. See, I got one of those later. I got one of those.

And um decided to just blatantly start taking photos of people. Not ask them not ask them not turn the flash on i think during. That end game last year or two like we we kind of knew the end was coming and we're like man wait we need proof of this from when we go we we need to be able to document this we need you know have images for these stories because people aren't going to believe you you can tell these stories all you want there's some things people they need to see it to. Believe it they kind of do number seven any votes do we want to yeah did we cover big mama you really we got sidetracked on the photo but just the money pain was the bulk of her yeah. I think super nice you know super sweet kind of like great mcdonald's employee outfit She was McDonald's.

Because we had that McDonald's right. Across the street there. We'll save. We'll save. That's towards the top of the list.

That's number two or one. That's two or one. I know that we're saving him. I've got three, two, one in my mind. Okay, so I've got one that's a low-rent version.

He needs to be at the bottom of the list because he was not that big a deal. He really wasn't even like a big story, more or less. He just... He's one of those guys you would run to... He doesn't even need to be a movie store kind of geek.

He's just one of these people that would turn up at any... job you ever worked this kind of guy would be there i'll spin around the photos and let you guys uh exactly coffee. Guy oh my god yeah coffee guy that motherfucker. But you know i didn't like him i didn't like him either one day oh god one day one day he comes in and he's like hey if you could uh if you could buy a home entertainment system what would you buy And I was young, so I was always on the internet, pricing stuff on BestBuy.com. And I was like, man, they've got this sweet, sweet Bose system over there. They have a 65-inch not flat panel TV.

They made flat panel? No, not yet. I know. I was looking into the future. Beautiful.

And it's only like $ 7, 000 back then for all of this stuff. And he's like, oh, okay, I'll be back. I do remember this. Comes back with the... receipt and he's like hey little jealous fat kid what the fuck check out this receipt I got why don't you pick out some movies that you would like to watch and I'll buy those too and I'll really make you feel like a true piece of. Shit if it makes you feel better I pushed him on super bit I pushed him on super bit I told him it was the future I told him, because didn't Lucas have something to do with that?

Probably. We should take a little break here and explain to the kids what Superbit is, because no one knows. LaserDisc and DVD. It failed, man. Which version was it?

It was the 8-track of DVD. Because it wasn't, like... They'd already gone with DVD. It was DVD. Because there was already, like, the DVD DivX War.

So that happened. DivX... DVD won. Well, they got. They got the idea in them that DVD is going to be revolutionary because we'll have special features on there.

But then they realized that special features took up room on the disc. And so why don't we pump up the audio and video four more megabytes and sell it for $ 12 more? Because didn't those come with no special features? No special features. Yeah, the Superbit was.

More expensive, had no special features. It had the best possible picture. In theory. But again, I was always at home watching it on my crappy, like, 48-year-old TV. Like, I wouldn't have known the difference if it was Superbit or not.

I will make an argument. Most TVs still hooked up by RF. Mine might be right now. I own every version of Luc Besson's Fifth Element. As well you should.

And Superbit is actually my favorite, even compared to Blu-ray. I like the Superbit version more. So yeah, that guy's got some Superbit movies. He's got every one of those. Awesome entertainment system.

Because, yeah, man, he came in, it got to the point where he would come in and be like, did you get any new movies on Superbit? I know that's the best quality out there. And I'm like, uh, thank God. Sure. I got my coffee.

What can I, yeah, he would always come in toting his coffee. Just waiting for my movies. Just killing you with his breath. This was the era before everywhere in the world had coffee shops, or at least certainly in our part of the country, I'm sure. Green Tree Mall still doesn't.

Yeah, but I'm like, that mall had gotten one, and it's funny that that's where it crept in almost first. Like, there was one or two little places in the trendy little areas here that had them. But it was, yeah, it was pre-Starbucks, and it was the mall-based places were the first ones in probably most of the country that started getting coffee shops. So he would hit our coffee shop every time and then come in toting his cup of coffee and have stupid things to say to you. I hope this douchebag's out there listening.

Congratulations if you are. Because you know what? Before I got poor and went to grad school, I had a home theater too, asshole. I had a 100-inch projection screen. How do you like that?

9.1 Dolby Digital DTS2 sound system. Booyah! Yamaha 9VX system. You know what that is? That's 920...

Little bits of electricity running through that bitch make it loud. Now, overall, how'd that work out for you? Yeah, just a little. Just so I don't feel so bad about myself. It worked out pretty poorly, and now my best friend owns it, and I don't get to go over and watch it anymore.

What a bastard. He does do 8-bit Nintendo on it, though. That's pretty sweet. Nice. Good stuff.

So, okay, do you remember. Because the only reason I kind of remembered him as, like, a specific story was the. Do you remember the Practical Magic story? Because I thought it was you. Like, I remembered it from hearing it.

Are we talking Sandra Bullock practical magic? No, no, Nicole Kidman. Sorry, Nicole Kidman. Is Sandra Bullock in there, too? I know it was Nicole Kidman, yeah.

Okay. Do you remember? See, I'm trying to remember. I remember the details now, but basically. Did he think this was the bound version of this movie?

Oh, yeah, I'd watch that. It was one of those things he would always come in, and he had, like, a weird thing of, like, he would be obsessed with the music. In movies, which I can't say anything about since I just started a spinoff show about that. But he would come in and he'd be like, he would go into specific songs. And he came in, I'm pretty sure you were behind the counter, Dave.

And he'd be like, have you seen Practical Magic? And he was selling you on why you should watch Practical Magic. And then he started talking about the song. And at some point, they played the Lime and the Coconut song. And, like, he starts, like, singing it to you or something, and you're like, oh, like the one in Reservoir Dogs?

Not a clue. Not a clue. Real music or real movie, not a clue. I don't know. Is any of this triggering?

I just remember, like, you were like Reservoir Dogs, you know. Most people, you know, movie geeks would reference it from that. You've got to be careful bringing up memories like this. You'll put him into a depression. He's depressed a lot of this.

I don't blame him. It's funny because, you know, he started telling that story, and, like, Part of me is like, this sounds familiar, and it's just interesting hearing you tell it, like, with the response that I would have done. It's like, as soon as you said lime and coconut, it's like, oh, I would have said reservoir dogs, I'm sure. Like, that would have been, maybe that really did happen, or maybe you're just, you know, kind of know where I would have went with that. Tapped into your brain.

I do remember being annoyed with him. He was one of those kind of people, one, wouldn't let you finish. You know, you would start telling them something when talk over, oh, I know, I know, you know, this, this, this. Like, dude, I was only halfway into that sentence. I didn't even actually get to the point yet.

You don't know. You don't know a damn thing. But was very, you know, all about, like, what's the best? What's the best? Which is why I was all like, oh, super bit, super bit, super bit.

You got to get super bit. Kind of special reason. Would you like some batteries? Oh, my gosh. Best dish network ever.

You can tell he was compensating for something. Like, everything had to be the best. Well, and in actuality, like when I think about it, then and now in particular, I'm just like, dude was probably just old and lonely. Like, again, he's wandering the mall in the middle of the day, in the middle of the week. You know, it's like he obviously had nothing else going on.

Like, he always was by himself. You know, I'm just like... I guess. That was how he killed time. Maybe he had some sort of settlement and never had to work again and had money to burn.

That was his whole life. The alarm doesn't go off. Because he didn't look old enough to be retired. No. He was maybe mid-50s.

But he didn't look like he was retired. He was probably the inventor of disc doctor. Let's go see if they're pushing my shit. It's got to be the best. Because if you get a scratch on that disc.

This will scratch it up more. Diss Doctor. Don't go in reverse. Don't go in reverse. This show is not brought to you by Diss Doctor.

Do you remember having to listen to that? Remember it had its own little station with the TV and it had the video that played looping and you had to. Listen to it. We should do this show again with hypnosis to see how we really feel. I'm pretty sure we've laid it out there.

So yeah, I don't know. It was one of those like, but that stupid practical magic story stuck with me because it is one of those I would see the after effects because every time after that he would come in and I think he would do it to you and then he started doing it to me. He would go in and it would be like cold, like he'd never done this before. And he would be like, Have you seen Practical Magic? Like he would start overselling you that again.

And I'm just like, dude, you told me this like a week and a half ago. What are you doing? But it would like never click. Like I was a new person. I'm like, there's only like three of us that are here during the day.

You know it was me. And Dave started too. So shut up. Like it's just one of those he would loop back in every time and he would start that same little pitch. Like I needed to go see Practical Magic.

I'm okay. He prepped his script in the morning before he went into the mall. And if he loses his place, he has to start over at the beginning. Maybe he owns stock in whatever company made Practical Magic. That's how he made his money.

He was out pushing it on everybody he ran into. So now I have a question. All right. About policy and what became of Suncoast. Maybe we could call this product spotlight.

Because I remember that before there was a Hot Topic... Suncoast is where you got all of your Nightmare Before Christmas swag. Yes, yes. And I think. I have some that I bought.

I think Hot Topic owes us a thank you. Because we kind of invented their entire store. Kind of. Yeah. I mean, that's the thing.

Before I was even working there, I would always go in. Because, again, usually I'd be too broke to buy movies. But if I had to pick, I knew that the movies would be there. As long as they were in print, that stuff was always there. But the dorky t-shirts...

Which obviously leads to my recent side project of cataloging all my old dorky shirts. You have a problem. Yeah, I do have a problem. That's a problem. But the t-shirts and posters and stuff like that, we would get them in that first run and that was it.

Like you would only get, especially like new movies and stuff like that, you would get one run... You'd be lucky if you ever saw him again. You want your die-cast bust of Morpheus from Matrix reloaded. You better get it. You get it that time or it's never there again.

You better get it when it shows up. The time when, well, what ended up being one of the now dozen special editions for Army of Darkness and Evil Dead, but, like, that first time that... The phone book version of that. And I just remember thinking, oh my gosh, this is going to be the greatest version of this movie ever. And then cut to five other versions since then.

Take your pick. Oh my gosh, I remember just eyeballing that thing. Yeah, that thing was legit. But for me, that was kind of the difference for that store. It's like you could go to any lame blockbuster and get movies, but that.

Was the only place. And again, being the geek that I was, the stuff was... was like way more, you know, it was hard to come by because there was no internet back then. You couldn't just randomly order, you know, whatever shirt you wanted with whatever movie image you wanted. Like you had to come across it physically or you didn't have it, you know? So it's like.

It's icing on the proverbial cupcake. So I don't know. The fact that like that store actually got in product with, you know, dorky movie stuff slapped on it was like a huge deal for me. So it's funny that now. Not only can you get anything you want on the internet, but there are mall-based stores, specifically Hot Topic, that just like that became kind of their thing.

I think somebody was high and inside our store, which I'm like, oh, this would be a fucking great idea. You could sell fishnets to 13-year-old girls. That is awesome. What are you talking about? That is a great business plan.

Why didn't we think of that? You know who probably owns it? I have no idea about Hot Topic. Employee Spotlight. You do know that I've worked at Hot Topic for eight years.

Oh, I know. I believe in you. That's kind of why I was, that's kind of why I was. I didn't know if he knew though. I was like, you know, I literally just left that job two weeks ago.

Yeah. I was there for eight years. Which one did you work at? I worked at the green tree store for like five, six years and the St. Matthews for two and then back at the green tree for one or two.

I probably do. I know. No, I know. She has a little rock band, always dresses like Betty Page. Isn't that every girl at Hot Topic?

No, I was going to say, when you're kind of talking about what made Suncoast niche, and what I kind of alluded to earlier, the whole reason I got hired at Green Tree is because I knew about anime. Yeah. And you cut back to 98, 99. This is when Adult Swim was just starting. That was information that they needed.

Just starting. Yeah. And Dragon Ball Z in particular. And they did not have a certain... Anyone on staff that could even tell you the names of characters from Dragon Ball Z.

Yeah, because I was one of those people. I'm like, I still don't know that much about it. He literally was like... I feel bad for not remembering my manager's name, but he literally was like, you are our anime specialist. Yeah.

Like, we need you. And. That was a mixed blessing, because those kids are tough to deal with. But, yeah, I mean, that was the only place that had anime. Period.

It really was. Anywhere. It was. If the zone existed, you might have been eaten alive. Whether it be, you know, the VHS, you know, and soon-to-be DVDs of it, or clothing.

You know, at the time, we had all those Hawaiian-style button-ups with, like, you know, anime. Trigun and Dragon Ball Z all over them. Speaking of classy. And everyone's wearing these Terrible bright-colored glam shirts. And the figures and stuff.

But honestly, I mean, where else? At that time, like I said, this is when Adult Swim was first breaking and Cowboy Bebop was blowing up and Trigon was blowing up. You know, people were having more of reference to anime besides, you know, just Akira and Vampire Hunter D and Ninja Scroll. Yeah, that was Suncoast's niche. Too bad they wanted to charge $ 32.

99 for those anime DVDs and ran them all off. I mean, was that... they're doing? Or I mean, how much of that was just whatever source? Yeah, whatever source they were getting from. I mean, I wonder how much that was one of those things.

They couldn't, but you couldn't explain that to the kids. They're just like, I'm 12. I don't have anything. Most of the time, if you were lucky, you had four episodes on there. Imagine doing that with anything.

Oh, yeah. X-Files, Firefly, anything going, Here's four episodes of this show for $ 32. 99. Well, they kind of did that, like, in those early days. Like, if you remember when they would sell, like, when they first started doing, like, those X-Files, like, I got a couple of the LaserDisc.

There were two episodes on there. Oh, wow. It was, like, $ 34. 99, and I was like, what a rip. But, like, there were one or two that, like, were really good, and I wanted a version of.

So it's like, I only got a couple of them because of that. Was it Home? What was the one with Ice? Well, it was the first one. Ice was cool because it's the thing ripoff.

Like, Chris Carter admits it's his thing ripoff. So it's like, I remember I got that one. Home is the one everybody loves. It's badass. It's badass.

You know, I heard that it might have been you that told me, because I want to say we were talking about it so much. That was apparently loosely based on Charlie Chaplin's autobiography. Hmm. I think I'm getting the name right. Maybe.

I thought it was Charlie Chapman. Apparently he wrote about staying with some weird people in the South at some point when he was in between places or staying over someplace and something of that nature happened where there was like a sibling or a parent figure that had some crazy type of handicap and was on some kind of moving board thing something to where one of the x-files writers like read about or something was like oh my gosh that's crazy and like incorporated it or something it's crazy yeah i don't know i'm trying to remember other stories and. Stuff decide if i can not end up back at read if it's just gonna be a couple hours a week it's like just throw me back into something stupid i can live with that for as long as i have to.

Oh it's crazy Like I said, I just left Hot Topic a couple weeks ago. What's crazy is that they are– it was like deja vu with Suncoast. And I told all of them that. I was like, everything that is happening here at Hot Topic feels just like Suncoast. Which is– In the last days.

And that's what I told all my coworkers. I was like, this is exactly the same, which makes me wonder how much you're telling us because it's like they're pushing all these new kind of programs, little gimmicky things. They're grinding on us. Like, they started, and I know big places have this stuff. That's what they do, yeah.

They started focusing on conversion. Conversion is something that usually only bigger stores care about. Conversion is that they have counters now that count how many people come in the store, and you have to sell something to a certain percentage. And it's like, Jesus. I hate corporate.

We're a hangout store. People don't come in to shop. I go in there all the time. I couldn't tell you the last time I bought something. I just walk in to see what the dorky shirts.

Are, and then I go back out. I don't go there and buy stuff all that often, really, and that's why. Sell it for an honest price, Hot Topic. You know, we only go in there when we have the dollar baggy. Jeans in the back.

Right. No, thank you. How many Korn shirts do they honestly sell? None. Exactly.

They haven't carried Korn in years and years and years. I always got mine at Gadzooks. But how many One Direction shirts do we have? Really? Fourteen?

Yeah, probably two dozen. Really? One Direction. One Direction's down. Bieber on and off.

Heavy when he first broke, but now it's One Direction. Tons of One Direction shirts. Gosh, you all. I mean, it's... There's nothing niche about it anymore.

Like I said, they're grasping at straws. That's what's crazy is that, you know, back in the day, you know, even the logo itself used to say underneath all about the music. And at some point they changed the logo and they took that off because they essentially didn't want to be. I always felt like they were kind of like, it was just sort of the pop culture thing. It's just like, whatever's big right now, that's what we're going to stop.

Kind of that same thing that Suncoast would do for one shipment. And then we're moving on to the next thing, like, which is fine, really. I mean, if that's what you are. That's, you know, hell, that's the way to make money. They jock Minecraft.

They jock My Little Pony. They jock Doctor Who. They jock, like, Disney. As I was going out, they're carrying a ton of Disney. Oh, yeah.

I mean, that's got a huge market. You can't deny. You know, that's not a... Not a music store. Well, it never felt like a music store to me, though.

Like, it was such... It was all trend. Yeah, it's like it was all. Even then, like, even in the beginning, they had a little section, but I'm like, it didn't feel like you were at Music Land, you know? I was just like, it felt like it was mostly a trend store, and then they carried some, you know, CDs over there.

So, I don't know. They always billed it like it was music, but I'm like, I always just felt like that's more of what it was anyway. It was just like, whatever's kind of obviously hot, it's in your fucking title. So, yeah, I mean, I... I felt like that was kind of what they were built to be.

But that's what I was going to ask you is like, if I'm desperate enough to go back and work somewhere, is that going to be equal? as bad? And, like, from what you're saying, it's equally as bad. It's the reason I lost. It's the reason I lost. Yep.

Like, you know, the first six years were fine because they were fine, frankly. Yeah. I mean, they were doing really good when they hit their stride. That place was probably making a hell. Of a lot of money.

Especially Twilight. Yeah. After Napoleon Dynamite, which was bizarre. Napoleon Dynamite came out. It's still bizarre.

But the product was. That's what was bizarre. At the time, movie shirts were not a big deal. That was so strange. That's when I was wearing them.

At the time, the novelty shirts were obscure. They were trying anime a little. But they were mostly word tees. Like, usually the novel stuff was word teased, stupid, silly, dumb phrases that were played out. You know, some invader zim, some stuff like that.

Then Napoleon Dynamite happened, and that's what changed everything for them. Then it was like, oh my gosh, what movie's coming out? Can we sell our shirts? Yeah, then it completely changed. And man, I don't know if it was a bubble effect or what, because it was hot for a minute, and then next thing you know, like, the owner is... stepping down and they're closing 200 and something stores and all this stuff hit the fan and next thing you know here's your nicki minaj shirts here's your justin bieber shirts here's your you know one direction shirts thank you amazon.com it just it completely shifted you know they're like we're not going to carry trip pants anymore we're not going to carry anything you know with chains and spikes on it anymore like get us all the neon colors you can um skinny denim you know it was It was strange.

It was very strange. But they're so desperate now. You know, if you work there, you can just feel the desperation of hell. They just want to carry anything that can sell. And at the same time, in the Suncoast reference, man, they grind on you.

Like, they didn't used to be in a number that... They cared about numbers, but not as an individual. Yeah. And now they do. Now it's like, you had an APT of this.

You had a UPT of this. That kills me. You only got this many memberships. You only did this percentage. You. only you know and it's like.

I can't do that wow drives me crazy i don't. Get commission you bring these people in minimum wage mall jobs yeah you want them to fight to keep their job you know it's like if you hit those numbers yeah you get something extra it's yeah you get to keep your lame job like it's not like the and that's what all those big stores started doing that like all your your like corporate run electronics your best buy kind of thing started that We're not commissioned. So we're going to go out of our way to make sure you know we're not commissioned, but then we're going to push everybody so that it seems like we're on commission because they're going to be obnoxious about everything. And customers think that.

It's a thing. You would get people that would be like, You know, now, do you need to ring me up for this? I'm like, no. And you're like, doesn't really matter. I'm not getting a damn thing.

Yeah, you can go to the counter. I don't have to be the one to ring you up. I'm like, well, are you going to get your cut? I'm like, cut? I don't get anything.

I don't think you understand how capitalism works, man. Not at the mall. This is not communism. I do not get a share of this. Yeah.

Yeah, there were a few stores at the beginning that were doing that, like the clothing stores. I know there was one that I went there, and within about five minutes, they went. I don't think so. And it was just not even me. Like, they could just tell I wasn't that.

Like, again, I belonged at Suncoast. Like, I was just a geek. And I went into the trendy clothing store because I was hard up for work. Like, I was there part-time, and I was trying to find something else. And, like, they were just like, we were both looking at each other going, this is not going to work.

Like, it was just very obvious, like, this is not where I belong. So, yeah, it's, I don't know. It's weird, the demise of the retail industry. Situation it's not like it was i don't think it'll ever go back to the way it was and you expect it anymore yeah unfortunate because like like i was saying before you know gosh almost all my jobs you know video games movies and music all three of them because i mean you're not even gonna start on game stop i don't know if you guys are still gamers i'm a ridiculous gamer dude you go on any game stop It's obnoxious. The moment you walk in, would you bring in the trade-in today?

Nothing, I'm just looking. It's like going to a used car salesman. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. And, you know, it's the kind of thing where...

And I understand. Having been there, especially, I understand it sucks when someone doesn't buy something. I did that, too, if you remember. I was at the... Before it became GameStop, I was there before they all melded into one big thing.

Yeah, was it Babbage's? I started at Babbage's. I ended up working at Software Etc. And then. At that point, I think I gave up right when they were about to all become GameStop.

They had just gotten bought out by the same company and they were about to form into one big company. If you go in there and you buy something and you don't reserve something, I mean, you feel like you kicked that dude in the balls. Or you kicked that girl in the taco because she is so just knows. You're killing her numbers for not reserving something. And then they got, because I remember before I left, it became a very big I mean, it became such a big deal that even within the system, they started like finding ways to try to rework it.

And then they started like crucifying those people. Like I remember our, and he was one of the managers for that whole area. And like, I still don't even know officially how much was really going on and what was good, but basically they accused him of, doctoring things to make it look like they had more reserves than they did because that's how much you got in. And it became very obvious that people wouldn't reserve, but they wanted to come in and buy it when it came out. They just didn't want to put their money down, but they wanted to be able to walk in.

And it got to the point where the stores would not send them, like the company would not send it to your store if you did not have the reserve. All you would get was enough to cover your reserves. And I still don't know how much of that was true, but they said that he was reworking stuff and he was like, Messing with it enough that it looked like they had more reserves than they did so they would get extra in so that we could sell them to people that walked in off the street. And I'm like, that is ridiculous. All he was trying to do was make your store money.

It was the stupid paperwork end of it, the numbers part of it. Whatever was being manipulated, at the end of the day, you still got your money. All he was trying to do. Was make the... Again, I understand there's some sort of internal issues there and they are going to get bent out of shape.

Whether or not it really happened, I don't even know, but I know that's what they ended up firing him for. I apparently came in, and honestly, I'm not rehirable. I actually tried to work there as a temp last Christmas, and the guy tried to and started to do the paperwork, and I guess my DM put me in as not rehirable because I came in on the coattails of some crazy shenanigans. Apparently, the DM was incredibly shady. and they sent this other guy in to essentially get rid of the DM and then pretty much get rid of all the managers. And I have no idea what's going on.

I'm like this new, you know, I come in, you know, it's this third key, and pretty much I'm on the chopping block because, you know, I was there before this new DM came in. But, yeah, I was hearing stories about, I guess at the DM level, you know, they must make a lot of money because, like, they would have these contests with these DMs where, like, you win a car. It's like whatever district gets the most, you know, reserves for Halo 2, you know, you get this new car. And apparently our DM in particular was just killing these contests. Just, you know, was just had vacations and cars and all this stuff.

Jesus. Well, come to find out, like, they go to the store and there's like 500 copies of Halo 2 in their closet. And they're like, why do you have so many copies of Halo 2? And it's because they faked so many reservations. That is awesome.

You know, to win this contest that they're sitting on this disgusting amount of inventory. I mean, there is a line. There is a line where it is ridiculous, and it is, like, shady what you're up to, especially when they're giving you prizes and stuff. But, like, I don't know. The way that I heard the other one is more of, like, he was just trying to get in product for the stores.

He was trying to cover his stores. Yeah, he was, like, he was trying to make the stores, you know, represent what they're there for. That's the whole point is you're supposed to be able to walk in and buy this game. And, like, he was trying to make That happened for his stores. I'm just like, he's...

In a way, he's doing his job, but you guys have found a weird way that make him jump through these hoops so that he can't do his job, or if he does, he gets fired, which is what happened. It's a bizarre philosophy. It's kind of like what I was kind of saying about, you know, how kind of grumpy... How they don't even hide their, you know, their displeasure when you don't, like, reserve something. They're so open about kind of not being... mean, but it's passive aggressive.

You know, even when, you know, you don't do it and you get that, usually you get at least that snide comment. Well, when it's not here, you know, when it comes out, you get that kind of thing where it's like, dude. I don't need your passive aggressiveness. But that's so common. But it's the same thing.

It's true. It's so commonplace there. Yeah. You realize that's true. Like, you, from the other end, I'm just like, no, really.

We're not going to have it for you. It's like it comes off like they're kind of being snippy with you. Yeah. But then you realize, like, oh, no, wait. That's the company's mentality.

Well, and we'd done that. Like, we'd had people, like, we'd say, well, you know, we might not have enough when it comes in. And then they would come in on opening day and they'd be like, hey, where's one? I want a copy. And we're like, I told you to.

I'm like. I wasn't lying when I said we're not going to get them. Like, that's how this company operates. I don't know. It's a weird situation.

I think it's part of why retail has, like, completely, like, the huge decline. Like, there are no stores like that anymore. It's all, like, super corporate stuff. And it's almost all, like, you look. This is something I noticed once they closed our store in that particular mall.

And then if you go to just about any mall, it's like that. Walk around. like are there any products there anymore it's all clothes it's just which I guess is what you go to the mall for when you're a 14 year old girl but like I went there to get stuff you know it's like but it's all like just high-end clothing stores and that's all it is. I just pre-ordered Star Trek Into Darkness and you know who didn't try to get me to pre-order anything else? Amazon.com. And that's why they're still around.

See? I think if people ever got comfortable with buying clothes on internet I think malls would go away. I think clothing is just you want to try that. You've got to be able to check and see if it works. The hassle of returning clothing you know through mail is just too much of a pain.

We just have these graveyards we went to to get Sparrow's pizza and walk around. Yeah. Which is all I really want to do. That would be fun. I just want to hang out there and have some pizza.

Where's the arcades? How come there are no arcades at the mall anymore? Which takes us to number five. Which is? I have no idea.

You're just making shit up. We've got to save. Well, I guess we can go and get the Klingon sisters out. Klingon. I think that's the teaser.

I think we need to wrap this one up and we'll come back. next time and give you guys that. We've actually got stuff coming up in the next few weeks, so I think we're just going to hold off, and then next time you come back, We'll fire him with the rest of these. And truthfully, we are saving the big guns. There's a grand finale that's coming your way. If you've already fallen asleep, wake back up.

There's going to be... I mean, we have a lot on him because he's a character. Yeah, especially with the co-workers, too. Oh, yeah, we got some other choice co-workers. Yeah, so I think we'll leave you wanting a little more or wishing you hadn't listened to all this.

I'm not sure which, but... Yeah, we'll wrap it up here and come back for another episode in a few weeks out. We'll finish this thing up. Otherwise, that about does it. We will return next week.

Same geek time, same geek feed. Thanks for listening. Come on, Jessica. Come on, Tori. Let's go to the mall.

You won't be sorry. Put on your jelly bracelets and your cool graffiti coat. At the mall, having fun is what it's all about. I haven't done my homework yet. That's okay.

And you know how my parents get. Whatever. I don't care because all my friends are going. To be there. Everybody come and play Throw every last care away Let's go to the mall today Cooley Mouse, I love it There's this boy I like, met him at the food court.

He's got hair like whiskey and he does jumps on his skateboard I hope he asks me out, take me to my favorite spot. Dad says I'm too young to be a man But baby, I don't wanna wait. But that's okay, I'm gonna rock your body anyway I'm gonna rock your. Body till Canada Day Everybody come and play Throw every last care away Let's go to the mall today. I went to the mall with a couple of friends.

I had a whole week's allowance to spend. I won hoop earrings and a Benetton shirt. We came here to shop and we came here to flirt. I turned around and who should I see? Prime Minister Brian Mulroney.

He said, young lady, I don't approve. So I had to get down and bust. A JC move. Hit a Fred. Everybody come and play.

Throw every last care away. Let's go to the mall today. Everybody love. Today. Today.

Today. Today. Let's rock the mall. Let's rock the mall. Even the whole time I was working at St.

Matthew's Mall, working at that Hot Topic, I never walked around that corner. Some part of me was just like, I don't even want to be in this part. Of the mall. I would pull into Cheesecake Factory, go right there to work, and never walk down there. This episode is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced and edited by The Oddity Studios, with opening music performed by The Empires.

For more on how to sponsor or support the show, email producer at moviemeltdown.com. Talk hard!