Dead and Confused (Promo)

You expect me to remember that stuff. I know, because I don't remember a damn thing. So at least this time, I remembered we're supposed to give people a movie threat. I'm just here to get mad at 40-year-old movies. Well, pretty much happens on a regular basis.

So I was once again, I hadn't, I looked through stuff I'd come in contact with in the real world. I hadn't seen much that fit. I usually try to match up something. So I went looking for something and found something that matches almost exactly. So, Messiah of Evil, 1974.

A young woman goes searching for her missing artist father. Her journey takes her to a strange Californian seaside town governed by a mysterious undead cult. There's a lot going on there. It already seems kind of interesting, but then I had no idea. So the directors are Willard Huyck and Gloria Katz.

I was like, those are the people who, I'm like, I only know those because those names were on my wall for years. Because they are screenwriters that I know. I mean, they worked with Lucas. So they did like Indiana Jones. They brought us the wonder that is Howard the Duck.

So if I didn't want to see it before, now I definitely want to see Messiah of Evil. I feel like I've heard about that one in the same area as the movie that we watched for today. Yeah. The hell you say. It's nothing like that.

Like both weird. kind of cult 70s 80s movies that are actually way better than you think they. Would be yeah it's definitely uh kind of a its own subgenre well it's also the like small town subgenre which in anywhere can be small town in england small town and you know cape cod small town california so you get into those weird small town craziness it's its own subgenre too so yeah But yeah, I thought that. Was at least an interesting entry. Maybe people have other, better options. We'll see.

But in the meantime, you'll listen to us. Say ridiculous things like this. She so doesn't fit in that movie. Like, it is to me the off part of that movie. The finales are always off for a lot of people.

I don't mind most of them, but that's the one that's probably the most off for me, and it's mostly because.... Also the dumbest line ever when they're giving each other fake names and he's like, I'll call you Lisa. I've always wanted to meet a Lisa. That is very exotic. I mean, you don't come in contact with Lisas.

I have dated two and I do not get around this. You've learned your lesson. None. What do you think? I'm laying off the Lisas from here on out.

Like it's such an exotic name. Yeah. Oh, Lisa. I can't imagine in 1981 that it was an uncommon thing. Right?

No. I think the actress's name was Lisa. I looked it up after. Easy enough to sum up. It's Superbad meets Shaun of the Dead.

Yep. Pretty much. Even your star didn't want to commit to it. He's like, I'll do it, but I'm not reading any dialogue. Right.

I'm not memorizing. Not reading the script. I'll show up. I'll use a mop, but I'm not going to. Freaking say words.

Yeah. So dumb. I mean, honestly, in a movie like this, the answer could be magic. And as long as that comes from one of the characters and they say it in an authoritative sort of way, I'm okay with that. I feel like the marketing didn't do it any favors, which is weird because it was a really, really good marketing campaign.

Yeah. But the movie was just so different. We're focusing on the characters. Character as though it's a freddy as it's adjacent and like once you get in there you're like this is barely about this character really it's it's certainly not it doesn't need to be sold having to do. With otherwise it is night of the lepus but with slugs and they're not gigantic like the bunnies they're.

Not inconsistent like the bunny sizes. No, they are very inconsistent. But they're not. And it really is like night and sleep. I mean, they're big for slugs, but like half the size of a banana.

But they're not as big as a car sometimes. Sometimes, but not always. I mean, there's times where overacting is awesome. But yeah, in this movie in particular, I'm like, yeah, it's fine. Yeah.

It's fine. Go ahead. Go big. It's cool. Which is funny, because as a kid, I didn't really...

Come to terms with that. And now when I watch it, I'm just like, what a monster. Yeah. This guy's horrible. And then we see little baby Freddy Krueger.

Yeah. That is what I wrote down. Little Freddy Krueger. Look at him. Oh, not burned and shit yet.

He's just hanging out with kids. Yeah, it looks good. It's creepy. But the plot doesn't. do, but I wanted it to be. It's very procedurally, but I'm like, we've got 14 shows on a week that do this, so you've got to really go above and beyond when you're a movie trying to do the same thing that every cop show trying to figure out who murdered who does.

So I'm like, this kind of does because it's a little more dark, but still not really enough to sell it for what it is that it's trying to be in the end. That it's annoying when a movie is like, the devil! And then every plot hole or anything could just be explained away by like bull because it's the devil he can do whatever he wants it's like okay but that's so. Lazy shows involved and then it's fine if you build. A talk show around him as a guest then it's okay well and i guess if they're yeah like if you know from the beginning that that's what it is but for some reason it just felt Much more like a cop-out when you're expecting it to be serial killer and then instead it's like a devil.

Or whatever. Like, to me, as you're saying that, I'm like, oh, yeah, I guess that was. Like, I'd already kind of forgot what the wrap-up was, which tells you a little bit about what was going on there. I was like, yeah, something, I don't know, evil and shit, whatever. It feels so passé.

It's like very 80s. Yeah. Like satanic. But not in a good way. Yeah.

Normally that's a sales pitch where you're like, oh, really? Yeah. But no. Yeah, I mean, it is a product of its director. Yes.

If you like him, I feel like you'll like it. If you're a horror movie fan and you don't like him, don't know that it's up your alley. Because it is not a speedy moving movie. No, it is not. It is slow.

And then once it gets going for the zombie movie that it is, it's still like, wait, what are we doing? It doesn't operate like your normal zombie movie. All of his movies look good. Yeah. And have that kind of like slow, artsy, cold.

But usually it nails the end and then you're like, okay, and it made it worth all of this buildup. Yeah. And this one I was just like, eh, not really. Yeah. Yeah.

It's like, it's fine, but not, not quite up to your usual thing. I'm not saying it's not right for horror elements, but that would just look like a big, dumb, put them in giant costumes and make things bloody movie. Like, doesn't make it good exactly yeah it's just the thing you're doing did. I ever tell you about the bootleg uh sharpies that i found no they were called skirples and they were put. Letters in a bag and drew them out like laying them out here's what we're spelling.

I found them at a at a peddler's mall type establishment that seems about right there was a pack of five of them and they were dirt cheap and I was like, hey, Sharpies. And it was one of those things where you're standing, it was so well done. Yeah. Like you're standing there looking at it and you're like, I know something's wrong here. Sounding it out.

That's not right at all. And it finally dawned on me they were Skirples. And they were good markers, but they smelled really bad. Fine tip or just the normal Sharpie? Normal Sharpie.

Okay. I wish I could find more of them. Yeah, the three jobs are sailor in hat, gas station, and nurse in hat. Yes. And diner lady.

Gotta have diner lady. There's a teacher. Yeah, that's true, Janet. There's a witchcraft slash voodoo teacher. Like, I literally was like, it was later in the day, and I was just like, not in a good place.

And I was like, I didn't realize, I was like, I mean, there's nothing going on today. I was like, oh, yeah. I forgot. It put me in their mood so much that I was like, holy shit. I feel what they're going through.

This is rough. Yeah, I don't think I need that right now. I was going to say, take it into account because it is so good, but it is real. It is some hardcore shit going on. But it's also funny at times.

It is meant to be a dark comedy is what I keep hearing. And most of the time, that's kind of true. But there are times when I'm like, there ain't no jokes there, man. It's dark. It is dark.

That seems so much more like surgically cutting out specific memories while still remembering other things from your life before. You just take a scrub brush to their brains. Seems a lot more complicated. And there's a close-up of this adorable little slug trying to take a bite out of his finger. And you hear it go.

Well, they have that random spooky abandoned house that the family goes into because they think there will be ice in there. Well, and then so when he like buries his wife, now is she dead, dead? She took her top off. I was like, what kind of movie is this? And not like, you know, but it's like, what the hell is this?

And then all of a sudden he gets clubbed in the head. I'm like, oh, it's this kind of movie. Go get him, Nelson. Bite his butt. Oh, he's going to do it.

I hope you're talking to the cat. Yeah, I do too. He sneaks up behind him and bites his back leg and then they... Flip around and yell at each other. Especially at three in the morning.

That is the best time to wrassle. Yeah, that's when you like to wake up your mom. So go to MovieMeltdown.com, join the Meltdown Horror Club, and give us possibly a better movie than Messiah of Evil, but I don't know. Sounds pretty cool to me. Or worse, if you can find it.

Maybe you can come up with a better option. You just let us know.