Maybe it is Cranberry Sauce? (Promo)

Alright, let's get to the movie threats. Because, you know, this is what we do for our other people. The super elite, you know, they get to listen to the horror club, but For the rest of the people, this gives me a chance to talk about other things. Like, this is one because it's not. Again, if you want horror, go join the horror club.

But occasionally, I get to talk about other things, and I wanted to run this past you. Let me bring up a photo here. Okay, so I'm in the real world, which I don't normally go into, but occasionally I'm looking for, you know, toys and movies and crap. So I'm around people, which is also weird. But before I get into the conversation, let me ask you, because on the show previously, Nora, you've mentioned you're not really a.

Star Wars person. So quick pass without killing it. Do you know what that is? Not an Ewok. It doesn't count because you...

I know you know. I'm guessing it has four letters in the name. It does? It does. You're doing pretty good.

Give me the first letter. J. They live on Tatooine. They sell robots to. Again, if you haven't seen the movie, none of this makes any sense.

I know, but I just like. A Jabba the Hutt. You're close. They hang out in the vicinity of Jabba. You're right.

Same syllable count. Okay. A JoJo. No, that's your favorite pop singer. We all know.

Don't try to deny it. But, okay, Phillip, you're dying. Go ahead. It's a Jawa. I'm in a store.

And most of the, around the place I'm at a good portion of the week, there's a whole bunch of like thrift stores and stuff. So I'm in one of them. There's not one, not two. There's three guys between 25 to 30. Not a one of them knew.

They're looking at one of the, like, 12-inch toys, which is, like, 6-inch for these guys. And they're looking at it. And they're like, you know, I'm not really into Star Wars. What's his name? Like, not a clue.

And I'm like, guys, really? I was like, I know... There's like a subculture of people that. Just do not care and do not want to even get into it, which I get. But I'm like, just just pop culture osmosis at this point.

I don't know. That was. Especially dudes. Yeah. Although it's pretty evenly balanced now.

If you're on Gen Xers, it was a wasteland for girls. But when you get to like millennials and definitely the new generations, I. Think it's evenly matched of hardcore geeks. I think the girls are just as bad, if not sometimes worse, in their subculture things. But yeah, I don't know.

That was just a weird moment of, really? I recognize him. So at least you know. I just don't know what he's called. They weren't even close.

They were like, I don't even remember. They were saying other things, and it might have been Jabba. I don't know. But they were just like. And it's one of those I had to bite my tongue because I don't want to be that dude.

I kind of missed my window, or I would have just been like, it's a jaw. I'm just like, I can't fight it. But I kind of missed the chance, and it would have been really awkward once they'd already gotten past that, and we're talking about something stupid. So I was just like, you know, I'm just going to shut up. And it's going to fester until I have to come on here and talk about it.

Well, I have to get this out really quick, because this is festering to me. I know they're called droids and not robots in the Star Wars universe. I. apologize but. He's talking to me a plebe. Yeah i know but i don't want the actually i do want the fanboys to write go ahead.

I again that's the kind of stuff i let slide again that's more of a generalized pop culture of like yeah they're all robots we know that's just a very specific branding in your own little universe that's fine but but yeah it reminds me there are times when as i constantly reference on this show the the normal people The regular people. The outdoor kids. Yeah, well, but grownups too. Because I still consider myself a 12 year old. So like when I'm sitting there and this person that I work with all the time who is, we're jumping ahead to the holidays, but they're already playing Christmas music.

And I'm like, it's too soon for that. And they said something about the Charlie Brown Christmas special. And I'm like, oh, when we get closer at the appropriate time, when you play that music, I'll be running Vince. Giraldi on a loop. And they were shocked and amazed that I knew who the person was who wrote the music for the peanuts.

And I was like, yeah, he's a genius. I'm like, why would I not know that? Well, regular people don't read credits. Yeah, they don't. Well, I mean, that one I had to seek out.

I'm not like a big jazz geek, but like, That music is so amazing. Like so specifically, I don't know, not even just tailored to that thing because he's done a lot of other stuff. And if you listen to his other stuff, it's equally as amazing. So, but yeah, just some people just don't pay attention to pop culture in general. But I'm assuming if you're the kind of dork who's listening to this right now, you do pay attention to pop culture.

So you'll want to not only listen to these little promos, but go join the horror club. Mm-hmm. So now we can get to the movie threat, which is what I call these every time. So this was, I was trying to find, we're heading, as previously mentioned, towards the holidays. We're not at the point where you play Christmas music yet, but we're at a holiday just before that.

So I thought this was the appropriate one. I recently ran across a copy of this. Let me give you the artwork. Thought that was fitting for the holiday that you only eat. I mean, that was.

Basically, the only thing built around Thanksgiving is food. So carnivore is what we're looking at here. Let me bring up the description I got off the back. Of this thing. So this is a Thanksgiving-themed movie?

No, no. Okay. But eating is. Sure, sure, sure, sure. That's why it's the best tie-in we can come up with.

Right off the bat. From afar, the old Romero house. Uh. Pause for grattle. Looks like a decrepit old mansion, reputedly haunted.

But what the locals don't know is that behind the facade of the ancient building, the U.S. government has built a state-of-the-art high-tech field lab, which houses one of the world's most gruesome experiments, a horrifyingly genetically engineered menacing carnivore beast. Huh. Those always go well. So, there's more. There's a whole nother verse.

There's a whole nother. stanza there's a whole nother i i don't want to keep reading but this is the kind of stuff we'll be forced to watch unless you come up with a better option for us because i'm sure you can think of a movie that's much better than carnivore but otherwise you know if you don't join the horror club and you don't put it on our list then we're gonna have. To watch carnivore so. Nobody wants that. Nobody wants that. I mean, I kind of want to see.

Look what you're doing. I like the idea that the government is like, let's build this lab under a spooky looking haunted house as opposed to like in an office building, but. Then only. Get creative again. Annoying kids that want to solve mysteries will get sucked into it.

I know, you're just like asking to be investigated by a group of teens. Teens wearing like GoPros on their head. Yeah. Live streaming as they run around a spooky house with a fake thing that lights up and somebody sold them for. Way too much money.

Dude, those are totally real. Told them that they can see ghosts with it and find ghosts or sense that it's cold in. This room or whatever the hell happens. I don't know. Orbs.

I can't afford real ghost hunting gear. There's orbs everywhere. You might just be on something right. You know for as long as we've known each other i am shocked now that you you point that out that i've never once come over to your house and been like look at this cool ghost catching stuff i bought. It really is expensive i know but at least one of the conventions maybe the one we just went to um the People are there selling it.

It's the only one that's not just horror movies, but horror movies and paranormal as a real thing conventions. So there are half of the tables are people that are totally selling to you. I don't know if they believe it. I don't know if I believe it. Who knows?

But there are sales pitches that, yes, it's a real thing and I've seen it. And here's a video that I made of me walking around the house with a GoPro. On my head. So they also, a few of them have equipment there that they are selling and it ain't cheap. If you're thinking about getting into ghost hunting, get a backer.

Some sponsors, if you will. Hadn't worked out for me, but maybe you can make that happen. I don't know. So anyway, that's the kind of shenanigans we get into on this show. Or we occasionally say things like this.

It's not quite as elaborate as the other, you know, holidays. Halloween's the coolest. Christmas gets all the attention. Thanksgiving's never quite as big a deal, but I figured we could at least hunt a human being, and that would be fun. So there's our adventure for the holidays.

Happy memories. Yeah. Precious moments. Before we even get to the kids in the car, we've got our condom salesman. Yes.

This entire movie is just so horny. It's like, oh, my God. Like, every time two people are together, whether they know each other or not, for more than ten seconds, it's like, let's have sex. I'm like, guys. You just do it in front of them, I guess.

Sure. It was the 70s. Things were different. I guess. Yep.

70s, but it looked like the 80s. Well. By the end, it really becomes almost more of a silent film. In so many ways. Not only is there a big stretch where there's not really a lot of dialogue, but also the makeup on these actors is very.

Old school theatrical. The way that they're shooting it is almost like those early silent films. The way that it's edited and there are scenes that are sped up really weird. It all feels really like those early silent films. So I was like.

So this is better than shots of room temperature gravy? Yes. There you go. You redeemed yourself. I just remember that because we were recording an episode and these weird people walked through and you were like, hey, just recording a podcast.

And like everyone else in the world, they went, oh, God, and kept walking. They didn't go, oh, really? What's it about? No, they went, oh, God, another idiot with a podcast. And they kept on going.

And I'm like, nah, I get it. I understand. You too will feel the cutting edge of terror in. So it's very smart and has that humor, but also crazy, gory moments. Nice.

And I didn't sleep after I watched it. I had a lot of trouble sleeping. And not because it freaked me out too much, but just because there was so much going on that I kept thinking about it. Yeah. It was weird as hell, but I loved it.

Wow. I mean, I have seen overacting before. Yeah. Jesus Christ. So weird.

Yeah, you're like, I promise it wasn't me. It sounds crazy. It was the demon, Your Honor. I didn't do it. Do I look like the kind of person who could make a body incinerate?

No, it was the demon. I mean, any news story you hear that you're like, what? It happened in Florida. You're just like, that's in pot. Oh, Florida.

Okay. I guess. Yeah. Gator all coped up, went into a mall and killed people? Yep, that sounds like Florida.

Yeah. And I guess was damned and determined to make sure we're making this movie even if I gotta sit there and pretend to be a doctor. Was I the only one that, like, as this happened, he was like, damn it, you made. Me spill my beer, boy. Yeah.

I mean, he did seem like he'd be a little more upset about the beer than his hand. Than a hand, yeah. I need my old style. Pick that up for me. Everyone in this movie is the horniest person in the world and you stopped mid make out to apply some fun spooky makeup to scare your.

Friends let's hold off you just put your pants back on honey we're gonna spend about 45 minutes putting this on your face let's let it dry and then lay on the bed for a while but I'm not gonna jump you yet yet then we'll get them to come in here and we'll scare them for 12 seconds and then that was worth it totally worth. It Oh, and the doctor being cut in half was amazing. That was hilarious. Especially when he comes and puts her back together. Like he expects that's going to.

Did. He just. Is this a tribute to this ridiculous movie we just watched? Yes. Because I'm like, it's kind of the same scenario.

I choose to believe yes. For sad reasons on both counts. I mean, I was like, it's sort of the same dynamic too. So, I guess. If I'm being honest, I've never been to Florida and not watched a man die.

Also on the Todd and Terry theme, I guess post-Late Night Tennis, Todd shows up and one of the other guys is like, who are you? And it's like, the guy who looks identical to Terry? What do you mean, who are you? Have you been paying attention? I remember maybe that same version, because one of them's like, Or maybe it's our final girls.

Like, oh, the one who escaped from the hospital. Right. You think? Because he looks just like the other dude that you're in love with, by the way. Right.

Wouldn't you recognize? Oh, you're probably his identical twin brother. You're the guy everyone's been looking for all night. Come on. Yeah, those again were some moments that you're just, what the hell is going on in this movie?

Who are you? Who are you? Think for two seconds. Come on. Take a wild guess.

Yep. What a great movie. I'll say that's the thing that stuck with me. A day or two later, much like yours, I'm still thinking about it. And that's the part.

It'll stick with you for a while. This general ennui that comes with this movie. And I'm just like. God, it's just like, not the horror parts, not the weird characters, but just the emptiness of her existence that I'm just like, yeah, I get it. A day or two later, I'm still like, yep, yep, that part's sticking with me, so.

Nobody cares about me, but if you're also thankful that these two show up every time, write in and let us know, because I'm thankful that they're here. So if you also are, which a handful of times, that does happen. We've gotten feedback once or twice in typing form on the Facebooks lately. And then I was going to say. Are you trying to say that me and Nora are getting fan mail, but you're not telling us?

Oh, no, I'm not going to tell you that. Give me compliments. We did just this week. I need the validation. Well, that's what I'm saying.

Write in and let them know. They need to know. Please. But I will pass this one along. Shout out to Movie Meltdown because they told me about it and I watched it and liked it.

So Nora points to you. You suggested it. People actually listened to you. George watched it and he enjoyed it. So there you go.

Welcome, George. It all came full circle. I'll just sit here and try not to bother anyone. If Philip has inspired you in your life, let him know. I mean, alligators are cool, but for Christ's sake, that's a weird animal.

That's true. And they eat them. And vice versa. Right back at you. Once a week, somebody's getting eaten by a gator.

Symbiotic relationship. More power to the gators. There should have been more gators in this movie. That's the one thing that's amazing. If it would have turned out it was a gator the whole time, I would have been like.

Yes, this movie's awesome. Gator slasher. We need to get this going. Blood gator. I mean, he has a built-in way to kill people. really effectively, and yet he uses a machete.

He uses a knife, yeah. Which is really hard with tiny little legs. We're going to have to get him a special machete. I'd watch this. Machete Gator sounds kind of awesome.

Machete Gator. But yeah, I had to at least address the Jawa thing. Because it was killing me guys really come on what is wrong with you I. Don't know hmm. I don't know it's not for everyone I will give you a pass for recognizing it was from.

Star Wars yeah I was like I know those guys I don't know what they do but. You'd probably like them because they're cute that usually wins over at least the girls that are on the fence about Star Wars you get. To a lot of cute things They're like, Jawas, I like them. Ewoks, I like them. Baby Yoda, holy shit!

Yeah, everybody loves their baby Yoda. Everybody loves baby Yoda. Even people who don't watch Star Wars are just like, man, fucking baby Yoda, you can't fight him. Yeah. It's very cute.

He's adorable. There's a, there was a meme floating around, and the caption was John Favreau and Robert Rodriguez. I saw it again this week. Planning out whatever the new Star Wars thing is. It was just.

Two kids surrounded with Star Wars toys. With a big ad at going, ah! Like they're screaming. They're having such an amazing time. And I'm like, yeah.

Yeah. I remember that. I remember that. And I don't, I don't, I feel like they would take that as a huge compliment. Again, I was like, you know, they're sitting there looking at that meme going, yeah.

Yeah. That was me. It might be a picture of me. Hell, I don't know. So go to MovieMeltdown.com, join the Meltdown Horror Club, and you can give us a better thing to watch than.

Or a worse thing. It's up to you. If you're giving us money, I'll watch whatever you tell me. Does it get worse than these things I run across? I don't know.

We usually don't have to watch them, but sooner or later we're going to get to these movies and. We'll all suffer. Yeah, there is, despite what it seems, there is a finite number of movies. Eventually we're going to have to get to these so you better come up with better movies and get them out of the way before we have to resort to watching these things that I keep coming across so join the club music