About this episode
Movie Meltdown - Episode 297 This week, the trio is back to attempt to focus long enough to discuss our Sofa Theater movie of the week - The Raid: Redemption. But we’re only halfway counting this as a Sofa Theater feature because the tangents return to take us way off course. Luckily we end up in some pretty interesting and funny conversations along the way. And as we try to figure out how we kill those damned birds, we also spiral off into... adding zombies, he’s a lawyer that does backflips, hostile planets, The Flashpoint Paradox, John Woo, so many orgies, Aqua-Man, #zoeblack, Annabelle, air vent crawling, tell Chris Pratt, Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, it’s a 3D world people…it’s a 3D world, the eagles, praying mantis is two fingers, Alfred, Prometheus 2, I love that he’s genociding people, Kung Fu Theater, saving Gandalf’s ass, zombie North Koreans, Jesus, magical future first aid spray, the biggest troll on the planet, Chewy’s alimony, F-y’all… I’m Benedict Cumberbatch, so he’s the Randy Quaid of this story, Interstellar, knife fighting, May, having an alien removed from your stomach, everyone left on Earth is uber-depressed, if Jon Snow dies… we riot, Jennifer Connelly, You can never beat the eagles… and why aren’t they just there from the beginning, the brother of the bad guy… is another bad guy, Salacious Crumb, shaving her head, Tony Jaa, Precinct 13, hamster style, Gotham, Exorcism films, getting it from both perspectives, Requiem for a Dream, Donnie Yen, the Millennium Falcon, found footage, Marco Polo, Bellatrix Lestrange, True Detective, Die Hard in Russia, running away from a demon, if being The Flash for justice doesn’t work out…, knees blown out, caves need cleanin’ too, so much stabbing, all-terrain feet, Oculus, driving a Cadillac into an engineer and then having some barbeque, Misery-ing George RR Martin, Zoloft and reverse guillotine is where it is. Spoiler Alert: We kind of ruin one of the reveals in “The Raid: Redemption” so go watch it if you want. But otherwise, we don’t go too far into the plot. “It’s like John Woo films without guns!”
Transcript
Automatically generated, so expect the odd misheard name.
I'm listening to Movie Meltdown because I'm John Saxon. And I like to do that. Music The following feature has been rated R by the Motion Picture Association of America. It is intended for mature audiences and parental discretion is advised. It's showtime, folks.
Enjoy the show. Our nuclear reactor, pumping out one million kilowatts of power. One day I'll put you right in the face and. Then you'll respect me. I'll believe it when I see it, machacho.
What's up and welcome to Movie Meltdown. I'm Brian. I'm Patrick. I'm David. So about the raid.
Anyway, we're heading back with our tangents to get into many other things. Yeah, we'll tree branch like crazy in the middle of this, I'm sure. But, okay, so now we're back for the raid. It's time for Sofa Theater. Sofa Theater.
All right. This week's Sofa Theater feature. Is The Raid Redemption, director Gareth Evans. The plot, according to IMDb, is the SWAT team becomes trapped in a tenement run by a ruthless mobster and his army of killers and thugs. Spoiler alert, we're going to ruin the hell out of this, I'm sure.
So plan accordingly. Go watch it now. You have been warned. So where do you want to begin with The Raid Redemption? I guess, you know, what year did it come out?
It is. Are we talking.... Original release date. Well, see, I mean. They were at.
I don't know about Indonesia. It's got the Toronto Film Fest version of it. It is September 2011. Sundance doesn't hit until January. Indonesia doesn't come out until March 2012.
That's impressive. So here's the deal. For 2011, not that original. No. When did Dread come out?
That's the thing. I know we were discussing this earlier when we were talking about how much they're going to be similar. And this is something I've heard recently that Dread actually started shooting beforehand. So they, I'm assuming, had their screenplay well finished. But because they're a huge studio movie, they're a way bigger production, it took them a lot longer to finish, a lot longer to edit, and add in their special effects and all that.
So this one came out sooner. But technically, I don't know. I'd heard Dredd actually started their principal shooting before Raid Redemption ever got started. Gotcha. I guess we should clarify that.
It's like the storyline is incredibly similar. It's like building. One-on-one-one. The same. Just not super future.
Entire building is inhabited by gangsters and mobsters and street thugs. And you have like the crime lord guy living at the top kind of orchestrating everything as to please try to come in and take him down. There's a couple things that I like, a couple things I don't like about it. And I think my major concern with it is it's not it's it's not John Woo and it's not Kung Fu Theater. It is like realistic, but not realistic Tony Jaa kickboxing kind of thing.
It's kind of like. It's realistic and it's bloody as hell. It's bloody as fuck. But it's not realistic in the fact that any one hit on anyone would shut down any fight. And we decided they would be a bloodbath if they actually did continue.
There's so many nights. Usually for this type of choreography. It's just. blunt force but there was so many machetes and knives and so much stabbing going on that's that's actually. What i liked about it as i went into it because it almost changed it again almost like going up in your levels in the building it's because it starts off as a gun battle like that whole first part in there you get them going up those first. Five levels metal gear silent stealth and.
Then that that part where they're on the on the different levels firing each other. I'm like, this is just a war movie at this point. These are just troops just locked down, firing at people. On level one, they give ten fucks. And then it just starts dramatically decreasing until zero fucks are given and they're stabbing each other with fluorescent bulbs.
Folding tables. Fucking folding tables, man. But I think that's what's. Kind of cool about it is that you get that part in and even then, cops are kind of like just taking people out while they're sleeping they're just cleaning house at that point you're just like oh this is gonna we're watching it going man nobody's dying this is great they're only on level 5 this movie's almost over right oh shit like all of a sudden it changes gears. And like we get we.
Get into like the knife fight portion and it like that kind of comes and goes the whole time but then it becomes just way more hand to hand combat the further up you go it's just nothing but beating the hell out of each other With your fist and your feet and whatever random fluorescent bulbs. I remember talking about Resident Evil earlier. It kind of reminds me. I think it was Resident Evil 4 where it was like the infamous knife fight. Yeah.
It was all like real time. Yeah, yeah. A lot of that kind of stuff. It was just a lot of like hand-in-hand combat. But, you know, most of these guys had one knife in a hand.
And it would just, for some reason, even like 75% of the way through the movie, I was still kind of like shocked when all of a sudden someone gets stabbed in the neck or stomach real quick. I'm like, oh, like. Wow, you were punching. Reverse guillotine. Reverse guillotine is where it is.
Man, there was some brutal, brutal stuff in there. You know what I think the movie's missing? Other than like... Donnie Yen? Donnie Yen.
Is an outside story arc, which I'm pretty sure like number two or number three has to have. But I need some like. We have that whole thing going on in there, and sure, there's the little plot twist where the one bad guy is actually the brother, and that's great and all. Spoiler. Spoiler.
It's 2011, everyone. I threw it out there. I'm joking. But I need, like, an outside story arc. Maybe, like, we have the one group of snipers.
We need another group of cop snipers. What if we had a cop on the outside talking to our main guy with a radio, and he was, like, picking him up some Twinkies, and he's just like... He gets roped into it somehow, and then the whole time we just kind of check in with him every 15 minutes. Is that the first Die Hard movie? That's the first Die Hard.
I'm making my bad Die Hard reference. Did anybody see Die Hard 6? Or whatever the latest one is? I saw Die Hard in Russia. I've only watched two.
It's so good. It's so good. Did you see him hang on that helicopter in the end? I've only watched two. I don't want to taint it.
I've only watched two. Two diehards. I've not watched anything after. No, even three is fun. Is the third one good?
Three is probably the best one in my opinion. This one was Samuel L. right? Where he has to walk down the street with the signs and all that crazy stuff. It's not normal because it's more of a buddy cop thing than normal diehard routine in one and two. I liked the bad guy in four.
Four's interesting, but it turns that corner of fucking ridiculous. Yeah, the end, especially the Harrier jet. All of it. So much of it. I'm just like, this is not what Die Hard was.
You guys have lost your way. Yeah, they've moved away from Die Hard so much. Which, if there was an air vent crawling scene in the raid, that would have been sweet. I mean, we do have them inside walls at one point, and they chop through a floor. I'm surprised they didn't do that.
It seems like that would have been a no-brainer to have them crawling through the vents at some point. I mean, there is the one thing that would have made it the best, which is zombies. Yeah, he kept saying that throughout the entire movie, everyone. At any point, going down the hallway, you'd be like, zombies. Would make this so much better.
It would have been so much better! Because then you've got that thing where it's like, you know in the third one, and I don't know this, but I would suspect if I was making it, You've got cops versus bad guys, and then it's like eventually you're going to have to do cops versus bad guys, and then another set of bad guys, like the Koreans are going to be there. And then it's like you've got cops, bad guys, Koreans, and then zombies. Zombies give zero fucks. But what's the fifth army?
The eagle. The eagle. Eagles. And that's when it ends. The Nazgul just pop out of nowhere.
Everybody's like, damn it, let's go home. The Eagles are here. You can never beat the Eagles. And why aren't they just there from the beginning? What are they doing the whole time?
That was my big gripe reading the books is that I think there's, isn't there three? I think there's three pivotal, like, we're screwed moments. And in all three, Gandalf... Because there's like in The Hobbit, when they climb up the trees and they catch the trees on fire, and you're like, they're dead. He calls the eagles.
But then when they go to the Black Gate and they're about to get... I don't think they did this in the movies, though. When they're at the gate at the end, did they? Lord of the Rings, yeah. Okay.
Because, yeah, because then it's like they get surrounded and the eagles show up. You know, and at the end of The Hobbit, that's what made The Hobbit frustrating, is he did it twice in the same book, right? At the end, the eagles show up, and it's like... Why don't the eagles just do everything? Why did you just send the eagles to Lonely Mountain?
Why are they even walking? Why are they walking for 14 hours? Now, see, wouldn't that have been cool? Wouldn't that have been cool if they were like, Gandalf's like, so we got to take this thing over here and do this thing for these dwarves and we'll ride these eagles. It'll be great.
And then Smaug kills them. Smaug's just like, eagles, fuck y'all. I'm Benedict Cumberbatch. So that should have been like Sauron's real plan. He should have been like, how do we kill these damn birds?
Right? These birds have saved Gandalf's ass so many times, we need to take out these birds before we make any moves on Gondor. This little hobbit dude is not a threat, but these damn eagles gotta go. No doubt. And the soles of his foot are so rough, he can go anywhere.
Altering feet. And that was the raid. The raid! So. We needed.
You know that the one guy's gonna be bad. They need some other plot line. You know the police are gonna be bad in the next one. You know the police are gonna be bad. If they continued as storyline...
It's going to be like he gets home and they're all kind of like gritting their teeth like, yeah, well done, buddy. We're going to kill you tomorrow. You can tell it's kind of going that route where like the whole police department is shady. Because, I mean, you know, the one cop was shady for whatever reason. You know what would be sick?
Ready for this? Precinct 13. That's where the second. One takes off. Oh, there you go.
Those are re-hit. The brother of the guy. The brother of the bad guy is another bad guy who does a Precinct 13 style hit on the precinct. It happens to be in the 13th district. And then in the third one, the North Koreans get there.
The zombie North Koreans. Zombie North Koreans. I think that would be a good way to turn it back around since, you know, they've already done Assault on... They've already remade it anyway. Well, maybe this feud goes...
Well, no. Star Wars happens before now, doesn't it? Because this was a long time ago. I was going to say, maybe this goes on for thousands of years, and that's why these people are into Star Wars movies now. Time's linear, man.
That's right. It could be going on tomorrow or yesterday. So at any point, the Millennium Falcon just whips in and starts nailing people with lasers. I like that the Sith apparently recruit gangsters from Indonesia. Is that how that works?
Like, Palpatine drops in and is like, hey. That seems more like a Java movie. Do you all want unlimited power? That little short. Guy seems like he would be hanging out with Java.
Executive Order 66. Maybe that's where Salacious Crumb came from. He kind of looks Indonesian. Kind of talks Indonesian. I mean, you know.
Sorry, Indonesian listeners. We love you, but we don't like you either. We love your little black noses. And Muppet ears. And mop tops.
Jim Henson's rolling over in his grave. Sorry, Jim. I don't know. So you're definitely super schooled in the martial art films. How does it hold up battle-wise?
Because I think it's pretty damn amazing, but I still feel like I'm catching up on martial arts movies. Okay, so here's the deal. It's interesting in that it has a lot of gratuitous action that is very violent and things that you want to see you are right to pick out that most of those hits are just unrealistic because people wouldn't get up from them. But they're awesome. They're awesome.
It's like super, it is like John Woo films without guns. How awesome. There was so many back and knees blown out in there. And it was always like the fifth hit in a chain. It was just like pop, pop, pop, knees.
And then there's a Filipino style of fighting that they do in this with the knife. And it's, it's awesome. It's beautiful. It's not a dignified style. So you don't want to see it though.
It's not like, oh, he's got the black mantis style and I can't wait to see that go up against whatever. So it's not the same kind of nostalgia you get for Kung Fu theater. And it's just violence for the sake of violence. I feel like someone watched Oldboy and was just like, that hallway scene was so good. Can we do that for an hour and 45 minutes?
We talked during the whole time and we talked about the Star Wars trailer the whole. Time because we were bored. Not the whole time. And we didn't need the story because the story was so simple and there weren't zombies. Yeah, this is, it was definitely a fan service.
It's not bad. Kind of movie. It's not bad. No, and I even recommend it. I think it's really good for action.
If you enjoy martial arts stuff, and yeah. But like, would I have loved to have seen a tiny little backstory where like, you know, the guy trained forever. Someone needed a cute daughter waiting at home for him to come back or something like that. Something. And he's, well, our main dude's got a kid coming.
Or no, like, oh no, no. The cliche Asian, Asian back thing. Like someone's wife or sister has like a mysterious illness and he's like, so much money whatever and like after he does this mission he's gonna get a pay raise at the police station he's gonna be able to like cure that mysterious. Disease you really really need Donnie Yen just taking his groceries home opening the door and he's like I don't wanna fight in fact I promised my master I would never fight. Really?
Legit? No, not me. Oh, I thought you were saying when you take a shell in, you're like, I will not kill anyone, master. I promise. We're going to shoot a movie around you, Patrick.
I don't fight anymore for very specific reasons. But what if Donnie Yen had promised his master that he would never do hamster style again? He killed those school children. Wouldn't it be like praying mantis since they have the knives? That'd be like Praying Mantis.
Praying Mantis is two fingers, man. Oh, my bad. Praying Mantis style already exists. My fault. Totally.
You need to watch Marco Polo. Okay. God. Are you getting paid by that? He has recommended that mostly to you, David, about 17 times.
Well, it's just so stylized. You will absolutely love it. So many orgies. Is it new? Brand new.
It's Netflix. They released the whole season in one film. Oh, okay. Good deal. And it's downloadable on thepiratebay.com.
Yes. I'm pretty stoked about that. Don't be stoked about that. It's going to be horrible, just like Ben Affleck. Some superheroes you can't save.
He's a lawyer who does backflips. He's blind. But he's got sonar. It depends on how it's done. True.
Just ask Chris Pratt. Like I said, I don't know if I said it on here yet, but when we were talking about it earlier, I'm honestly not a big fan of the majority of DC people. It's mostly Batman, but There's been, like, honestly, The Flash. I've always thought The Flash is kind of like, he's The Flash. I get it.
You run fast. I guess that's worth something. But when I saw, I think it's called Flashpoint Paradox. Was that the little animated DC movie he got a couple years ago? Where it's about where he, I'm not worried about spoilers.
He goes back in time to save his mom. But by doing that, yeah, he can run so fast he can go back in time. He goes back in time to save his mom. And it completely changes the timeline from that point on. Paradox.
To where he kind of like, you know, wakes up back in now, but he doesn't recognize anything. Everything is completely different. And they took so many, dude, Aquaman was awesome. And all these people that usually I'm like, meh. They were so incredible in this version.
I was like, no, I'm totally feeling Flash now. It's possible. It's all about writing. It really is all about writing. And if they write Daredevil well, he'll be great.
That's the difference with DC, though. That seems to be their move. They can do longer series. They just can't knock out the movies. Because the TV shows are doing well.
Smallville was good, but I'm talking about even now. People love Arrow now. I'm not sold on it because I'm not really thrilled with that Arrow guy. But like the new Flash series, I wasn't paying attention. And then I just kind of started catching them.
And I'm like, these are actually pretty fun. They're pretty well put together. Let me ask a question. Because I don't know a lot about DC. But has the Arrow actually already been done?
Was the arrow something that we had no idea already existed? Was in fact the arrow the Batman. Sorry, we can go on now. I think Batman outdates arrow. I hate to tell you.
No, that's what I'm saying though. But why is the arrow the Batman? Because the arrow doesn't have a big bat suit thing. He usually walks around. With his shirt off and girls like him.
He's rich. He's rich. Millionaire playboy. He tries to protect a single city. Hides his identity.
He has arrows. And specifically in this new, it started off different, so I'm told, in this new series. I haven't seen it. Specifically now has made a point that he will not kill anyone. Oh, but that's only after season two, right?
Yeah. In the very beginning, he was taking people out. Oh, okay. They're like, you. Can't kill them, Arrow.
And he's like, why? Thank you, Arrow. Why? But supposedly now, Alfred told me I could. At that point, I was like, how very Batman of him.
He has a British butler. Ooh, can we complain about Gotham? Have you guys watched Gotham? I've only seen about a few episodes. I'm not going to watch it.
I could complain so much about that. I feel like it's well produced, but I'm just kind of bored with it. Alfred's a dick. I mean, Alfred in any version of Batman, no matter how different a Batman story is, Alfred is always the nicest guy. you know, his pseudo-dad, you know, he is there. For Bruce Wayne.
I'm sorry, Mr. Wayne, did your parents die? No, he strikes them. In, like, episode two or three, he hit Bruce Wayne. And he's a kid.
He just lost his parents. And he, like, backhanded him because he was, like, burning his hand over a candle. It's like, oh, my God. I think they are purposely doing that, though. Because I kind of, they're taking a weird, relatively dark turn with this because I think they want, I've heard them now describe it as, Alfred is an enabler.
And even, I guess, really, in all the versions. I mean, he is. He allows him to grow up and go down this path and become this self-destructive character that I'm like, really, if he was a good butler friend to his parents, he would have stopped. Probably would have turned him in and be like, hey, this is totally Batman right here. I mean, if he really cared about it.
I'm doing this for you. I'm doing this for you, buddy. But, yeah. Yeah, he's kind of selling him down the river, being like, no, really, go vigilante everybody in the damn city. It's cool.
I'll sweep up after you. I'll help you build the shed. Yeah, I'm like, it's kind of true. Gaves need cleaning, too. It's very different.
Like, you know, Catwoman, Selina is, like, present when his parents get killed. Like, she sees it happen to the point where she takes his mom's necklace and whatever's left of it. I don't forget there's two necklaces, but she has Miss Wayne's necklace in hand and stuff. Jack Nicholson knocked all the pearls off of it. How did she get it?
It's so weird that they could afford to cast him in this TV show. Yeah, and the Riddler's the Joker for some reason? I only watched about four episodes. I'm sorry, Penguin. The guy that's being called Penguin...
His nickname is Penguin. He calls himself Penguin. But he's acting like the Joker. He's sadistically killing people and kind of laughing about it. Is he laughing like....
Kind of. He has a weird laugh. Danny DeVito will always be the Penguin. Shut your mouth. Just like Arnold Schwarzenegger will always be Victor Freeze.
Shut your mouth. If you're Bobby Freeze. I feel like Danny DeVito was decent casting. Schwarzenegger is horrible. Diddy DeVito is kind of the penguin in real life, unfortunately.
Don't you want to see the third one that Tim Burton wrote the story arc to, but never shot? He's coming back now. Is he really? It'd be brilliant. I posted it.
I haven't gone off on this on the show, but I've said my original theory many times, so I can finish it up now. Please go on. I've said for years, Tim Burton was awesome when he started, and then he took that hard turn, and everybody was like, what the hell is going on with his career? And I've always said Helena Bonham Carter. And now they're separated.
Right. I didn't just see that. Well, I mean, the last movie was actually the best thing he's done since he started. The Frankenweenie. I did not expect to like that.
Well, no, that was his previous last movie. Now he's doing Big Eyes, which I saw the trailer for and I went, that almost looks like a real movie. Like, how is he pulling this off? And then like a week later that hit the internet. So I was just like, oh.
That's what it was. She was sucking the life out of him. Well, you know what? And you're right. She actually is not Helena Bonham Carter.
She is Bellatrix Lestrange. She's been doing this evil shit this whole time. I feel pretty confident that that girl was probably just being herself in Harry Potter movies. I think that girl, I mean, well, even like figuring Fight Club, I felt like she was, she looked pretty comfortable in Fight Club too. I kind of feel like she's- I want to have your abortion.
She's a dirty, wasn't that the original script? Yeah. Fuck me like I'm in grade school, I think, is the other one. Like, which one was in the movie and what was the one that was the original? No, she says I want to have your abortion.
No, in the movie she says I haven't been fucked like that since grade school. So, originally in the script it was I want to have your abortion. And they were like, no. So, again, I'm not completely blaming her. He's equally as dysfunctional, I'm sure, but I just thought it was interesting that now that his career is starting to show promise again, they get separated.
Is he going to do Beetlejuice? From what I heard, I knew they were going to do it, and last I heard, he and Keaton were signed on. Well, because the last thing I heard is Winona Ryder is confirmed now, too. Even she is like, all right, I'll be in there. I'm fine if they do a good job.
It's going to take writing. And now it's in. It's going to take writing. I'm serious. Well, there's not enough emphasis on that.
There's, you know, that's my big gripe. I hate when, you know, kind of like, you know, I was complaining about Transformers and, you know, Hobbit and things like that. Whenever I complain about these movies, I hate that there's a part of me that always feels the need to go, it looks great. It was well-made. Like, I always feel like I have to say those things.
But, For someone like me, that doesn't matter if the core script and story isn't good. And I always find myself going, it looks great. Those aren't even in 480p. Those are just for your consideration. So he obviously doesn't care about the visuals.
The book was totally in HD, buddy. It's got two channel audio. What do you do with two channels? Most flat panel TVs don't even only have two speakers. No, but it's, I mean, it's true.
And that's what we've seen just completely dying in the last, almost since the 80s. Like, the 80s became the era of big, flashy, dumb, who cares. And it spilled over to the 90s. Like, they just got bigger and dumber as CG became more available and cheaper. And like.
I don't know. We get so many stupid things now, and I think that's the only difference is if they're well-written movies. Well, they overwrote Kingdom of the Crystal Skulls, and then you all bitched about that. I don't know what to do with that i'm still processing that one i still refuse i haven't seen it oh i've seen it no no i heard enough from everyone around me i'm like no i'm not doing it it is good you just have to kind of see in the south park episode solidified it like no i'm not gonna let them rape my childhood ever if i don't watch it it never happened. Shia labeouf and you're fine you're good the rest of the movie is golden there's moments.
It had promise i still feel like it If you would have reworked it, there's a way to make some of that stuff really work. They need to make the fifth one and just do it. He's like 90 now. He's Han Solo. I know.
Get off my Millennium Falcon. But he has no passion about that anymore either. Did you see him. On Conan O'Brien? He's like Tommy Lee Jones now.
When episode 789 was announced, shortly after that, he was on Conan O'Brien. And I mean... Conan O'Brien mentions it where he's kind of like, so, you know, and he's kind of getting excited. He's like, so we got to talk Star Wars. And Harrison Ford did this real dramatic yawn like he was so bored and stretched.
And he just made it real obvious he doesn't care about Star Wars. He is over it. At this point, wouldn't you be sick of it? Yeah. Yeah.
But at that point, I'd say just don't work him back in. Like, if it's going to be half-assed. Well, yeah, you know what they should do? If he doesn't give a fuck, then you have him be the, like, savior at the last second. The death of Sauron.
Yeah, right? So he's for Andy Quaid in this story. Absolutely. Remember me? Right?
I'm back. I can't wait for that new trilogy, man. That is going to be sick. That'll be great. I hope Will Smith's in it.
So about the raid. Hello. Before the next show starts, let's enjoy an intermission. There have been superheroes, supervillains, and super movies, but there has never been anything like karate and kung fu. And Bruce Lee, he's the man with the fists of fury.
Karate and Kung Fu, the new screen excitement you've been waiting for. Introducing the incredible heroics of Bruce Lee. Every limb of his body is a lethal weapon against an army of men, the most sensual of women, and the most savage of beasts. Karate. And Kung Fu.
The explosive combination that gives you the biggest kick of your life. Fists of Fury. Tweaked Audio. Your source for high performance, noise reducing earbuds. Available in three styles and seven colors.
Durable and designed to sound great for both music and those chatty podcasts. like the one you're listening to now. Tweaked Audio earbuds come with a one-year warranty, and now there's a special deal for Movie Meltdown listeners. Just go to tweakedaudio.com, and when you check out, enter the discount code MELTDOWN. Then you'll get 33% off and free shipping. Tweaked Audio.
Sounds better. Hello, this is Peter Mayhew, listening to Movie Mountain Down. It's part of your problem, you know, you haven't seen enough movies. All of life's riddles are answered in the movies. And now, on with the show.
Isn't there a Rosemary's Baby? I mean, I don't know. I could keep just showing how things are being made, but I think there's a Rosemary's Baby. Well, I mean, they already did the TV version. It wasn't bad.
Isn't Zoe Saldana? Saldana. That was last year. She has a couple colors now. Every color but black.
We're fighting for you, Zoe. We're fighting for you. Hashtag Zoe Black. Zoe's awesome. She's awesome.
I like her a lot. Especially when she's green. Let me tell you. Whatever they should just let the people who did the conjuring direct it and it'll be fine oh. God i'm afraid they'll make it like found footage at this point that new oh what the hell is that new one no the time travel thing oh the kids oh the kids that find the time travel machine and i'm.
Like okay not goonies. This could be entertaining it's not gonna be good but i'm like it looks like it's found footage and i'm like would you please I don't know about this one. It's kids that find their dead dad's time machine and then they like go back a day to win the lottery and then go back another day to make fun of the bully at school and then... butterfly effect happens i. Mean i'm all like messed up time travel stories. Just make a movie about it.
Don't make it fucking uh found footage is so useless at this point for me. It is it's done unless there's like gonna be unless they're using gopro specifically and it's a giant gopro advertisement. Only if they sponsor the show gopros are sweet and i'll talk all about how gopros are real sweet i. Kind of have a weakness from documentaries though i kind of dig those. But it's like, why is the kid holding the camera through the whole thing?
That's the thing. If it's a mockumentary, it makes sense because they're shooting a real documentary about this dumb person we're watching. But when they're holding the camera and somebody dies and they're still holding the camera. It's like, this is my friend Bob and he loves to record stuff. Oh, we found a time machine.
Keep recording. Keep recording every scene so that it all makes sense and there's no holes in the plot. What was the... I'm going to forget the name of this because I'm terrible at names. What was the...
The movie where the preacher goes to, like, exercise to farm girl. And it was done at found footage kind of way. And, like, at the very end, they're, like, summoning, like, a demon. Yeah, that's bomb. And he gets his fate.
I was so. The interesting thing is, like, that was one of those movies where, for me, I knew the ending was going to decide whether I liked it or not. Because I was into it. And then decided you liked it. But I was just like, okay, this ending is going to make or break it, though.
You didn't see it coming, though. But. I didn't see it coming. Well, no one saw it coming. That's my point.
The fact that that should have been that epic ending scene, like that fire was so huge, like him walking up on it, like, you know, being like a preacher and like, you know, just doing this, that would have been so amazing. But instead, the cameraman runs in the woods. I was like, are you serious? The cameraman went that way? That's realistic.
Like, it's over here. It's over here. This big demon. It is realistic. And I was like, oh my God, that should have been.
That's why you're not shooting the movie. I would have. I would have praised that movie if they would have just let him be in the bushes. Even if he died. Even if the big fire thing just consumed him or something.
But give me that. The fact that that was about to happen. The whole thing, he's kind of like snake oil kind of guy. But that moment, he just kind of stood up, went through the bushes like, I'm going to do this. Like, oh my God, this is going to be rad.
He's going to go up there and get all crazy on this dude. And the guy with the camera runs through the woods. I'm like, but, but, but. It's over there. Go back over there.
You're the worst cameraman ever. They need to pause on exorcism films for at least two or three years now. They need to go back to zombie films. We've had a lot of possessed children, a lot of exorcisms, a lot of ghost kids. But I really am excited that they're kind of getting back to the 70s with it, like Conjuring, Annabelle.
Conjuring was good. It's entertaining to me. It's fun. It looks like they're getting that whole feel. What was the plot in Conjuring again?
Because I watched something else. And the last 10 minutes. Was like Army of Darkness. Which one was the one with the mirror? No, that's the mirror.
No, that's Occulence. Yeah. I thought that was pretty good. I really liked that one. The one with the girl from Doctor Who, right?
Yeah, I really liked that one. I really thought that was really cool. We saw that at the drive-in this year, and it was awesome. Yeah, I dug it. Like, you know, it was recommended, so I was kind of like, you know, and it valued a person's opinion.
So I was like, all right, you know, this should be pretty good and stuff. But as it went along, I was like, no, this was... Wasn't it like a MTV or WWE movie? Like, didn't someone weird, like, produce that thing? Well, anything, that's the thing.
If that logo comes up at the beginning now, if anybody who has anything to do with WWE is in your movie, it's in their contract now. If you sign them to be in your movie, WWE gets to be a producer on the movie. So that will come up. It's in like the call. Who was in?
I don't know. I didn't see it. But I'm going to go down there now. Isn't she a glow wrestler? I'm making shit up now.
I would like to see her slam some other chick around. I give her mad props for shaving her head. I cannot believe that she went in like that. That was a whole other level. Did you see that reveal at Comic Con or whatever where she had a wig on so no one knew and she took the wig off and I was like, wow.
Just from that movie, I'm like, I want to see her do more stuff now. She lived. She's definitely going to be around some more. We need to return to creepy asylum movies. We'll see what we can do.
We can't do anything. We have a lot of influence over the Hollywood system. We just need more horror movies more often. I was going to say, like, horror is kind of on the down side because comic is doing so well. But there's still tons of it that gets made.
That's why I was so thrilled with the Mirror movie is, like, because it was actually really good. And, like, I'm so used to being disappointed by horror now. I'm just kind of like, or just mediocre. So when I see something really good, then I'm like, oh, shit, what was that? Like, you know, like, it really does make an impact because there's so much horror, at least low-budget horror, that still gets pushed out.
But, like, Not all of it's good. Most of it's not. I feel like the majority of horror movies anymore are like, hey, that movie had a really good idea, but I think it should have ended like this. I feel like almost every horror movie you see is like, well, even when I discarded people, it's like, oh, I saw that new horror movie. Well, it was kind of like Rosemary's Baby with this ending.
I find myself saying, well, it was kind of like this, but different at the end. No one's writing anything original. They're stuck on horror and not doing sci-fi horror. So you want more like Event Horizon. I want more Event Horizon.
Event Horizon is really, really good. Did you see Annabelle? Did you see Annabelle? Annabelle. It's a doll movie.
I avoided it because it was a doll movie. Watch it. Absolutely watch it. I've seen May. I love May.
May's awesome. I think May's incredible. Okay, May's a lot better than Annabelle because Annabelle's kind of like big budget, blockbuster. Kind of thing. But what they do in that movie that really, really excited me or made me love it was one, Bell never moves.
Two- the, it's like a demon demonically possessed or whatever, the demons cameo or when you see it or whatever, it's worth watching the movie. And it's like the movie as a whole, it's okay. It's fine. Like watch it once. You'll never want to watch it again, but watch it for two scenes and two scenes only.
And it's like, you'll know which scenes they are. You just watch it for that. But yeah, we need like, we need to, no one hears you scream in space again. We almost had another alien. You saw that, didn't you?
When he posted those. That concept was fantastic. It was phenomenal. But I want Prometheus 2 instead of that. I guess I'm not doing it.
I'm like, why not? Go do it. Do it. Everybody wants you to do it. It can't be more weird than the last one.
Just keep doing them. I want Prometheus 2. I want it. I think you're the only one. I don't give a fuck.
I want it. Do you want Ridley version or pass it off? Are you telling me you're defending Prometheus, or you just want another movie because you just want more Alien in general? No, well, I want more Alien in general, but here's the thing. I see that Prometheus is a part of a bigger whole, and the bigger whole, if done correctly, can redeem Prometheus.
Did you catch the underlying story of why the engineers want us dead? Why? Because we killed Jesus and Jesus was an engineer? No. This is absolutely confirmed from Ridley Scott and from Lindelof, whatever that...
Dumbass. He's the one that jacked up Lost. Okay. This is confirmed. This isn't like fan fiction, fan myth.
It's confirmed. When you set up... I think it's when they're in the Star Room or whatever. Something happens where they talk about you know, something that happened 2,000 years ago in like the missing engineered engineer that never reported back. It's essentially Jesus was an engineer.
We killed him. So they're like, all right, you got to go. You're one of those hostile planets. I mean, I already had problems with the movie anyway, but then when I found out it was, they were coming for us because we killed Jesus. I just want more.
Are you serious? It was. It was directed by Ridley and not Mel Gibson? Yeah. All the women were in the kitchen.
I couldn't get over some... For me, it's usually the little stuff. The Looney Tunes style runaway scene from the ship at the end. Literally, this big thing is rolling and we're going to outrun it. We're going to outrun it by running in the direction it's rolling.
And I mean, doesn't old girl literally trip? Yes. I mean, she trips and stumbles like 10 feet to the side and lives. Where? But Theron keeps trying to outrun it and gets crushed.
I'm like, it's a 3D world, people. It's a 3D world. How did you get to another planet not understanding the third dimension? But it's a 3D world where really smart scientists continually get lost, and walk up to creatures that they don't know what the fuck they are and go, hey, little buddy, what's up? And get attacked in their face.
Playing with the snake. Yeah, I'm like, there's so many problems with that movie. I still have the theory that I was, I don't want to say I was stoked for that movie, but I knew I was going to go see it. The trailer looked good enough, and so I was like, all right, I'm going to go see this. And sort of like to get prepped for it, I watched the original Alien again.
If you watch the original Alien and then watch that, you can say it all day long. That's a reboot. That is a reboot. This is not a prequel. This is not, you know, sort of more info for the story.
There are so many things that are absolutely identical in both movies. It's like. You made a reboot, but you didn't want to say the word reboot. Let's just be honest. You didn't want to say the word reboot, but it's a reboot.
And it's bad to reboot your own movie. Right. That's tacky. Or to change the ending on your own movie. Oh, Lord.
No, I'm not optimistic about a part two at all. I thought the alien. Wow. God. He already said he's not doing it anymore with the alien.
Seriously. Well, no, girl. Like had the alien removed from her stomach and got it sewn up with what looked like a freaking crane machine. Like something you'd go win like a stuffed teddy bear out of. This is sci-fi futuristic surgery machine.
And it like had a crane claw and like just like staples her stomach. And then she's off and running. She's all good. She's totally healed. She was sprinting and climbing and pulling people up.
You just had a baby essentially dead. You just gave birth and you are now sprinting, climbing, pulling, jumping, falling. Are you serious? First aid spray. Magical future first aid spray.
We need to hunt down Lindelof. I have a list. Michael Bay, Lindelof. Lindelof really does have to go. I love that he's genociding people.
What was the other thing that he recently... Not lost. he did some other movie recently and it was like, Oh no, it's the TV show. Isn't he writing, is it like the substitutes or something like that? He has some TV show he's writing now. The one where like all the people just disappear.
Like a bunch of people disappear for no reason. And now everyone left on earth is uber depressed. Like it, it felt weird. Cause I was like, okay, this is kind of, you know, it's kind of your cliche loss kind of thing. It's like something weird, you know?
So let's elaborate on this weird thing. you know, it's like, all right, all these people just disappeared out of nowhere. And it's like, you know, whatever, three, five years later. And for some reason, everyone else on the planet is super depressed. I get that the people, you know, in essence died or whatever, but it wasn't like that. It was almost like everyone felt like, like they weren't special because they weren't taken.
It's like, I didn't get to disappear. And these are the left behind losers. Like I tried a couple episodes of it and I was like, you had a good idea, but It's that same thing where I don't even think you know where you're going. I think you just get some pen and paper and go, well, it'd be really weird. And that's just kind of what he does.
Well, I even heard that the Jesus part was added on in Prometheus that apparently, you know, Ridley Scott had that core script and Lindelof and him kind of worked together and do some tweaks. And it was Lindelof's idea to have this kind of hidden motive for what's going on. I was like, why? We don't need it. You know, they're just aliens.
They're just vicious. Like we don't need like, You know, they were the lap dogs for some people that were pissed that we killed Jesus. I just think it'd be really cool if, like, there was a Prometheus 2 interstellar tie-in. That way we could have him driving a Cadillac into an engineer. And then they can all go down to Texas and have some barbecue.
All right, all right, all right. You know what I love about Engineer? I get older and they stay the same age. How good was Crime Story? Or was it True Crime?
True Detective? True Detective. I only watched the first episode. Oh, it's so good. I need to watch it.
And I need to watch American Horror Season 2 or whatever. I don't have time for TV series. There's too freaking many of them. Marco Polo is where it's at. Cha-ching!
Your check's coming. I know, right? True Detective is really, really well-written. Like, super well-written. It's, man, I have high praise for that thing.
And going into it, like I, you know, you know, like sometimes when you don't know anything about something you're about to watch, it tends to be really profound because you know nothing about it. Not with me in the show called Marco Bolo. Like that happened to me with Heavenly Creatures. I sat down. Well, here's what's really, Heavenly Creatures kind of has this unique place in my experience because I didn't, Going into it, I missed the first ten minutes.
Like, I showed up someplace where it was already on. So you missed the horrible order. And so I didn't know how it ends, right? And you have to imagine how lighthearted, like, the first three quarters of that movie is. Yeah, it's pretty fun.
So I'm like, this is really great. These girls are really fun. This is so cool. Oh, my God, what are they doing? Like, it gets to the end, and I'm like, what just happened?
What just happened to this movie? I was so blown away. Rose, how could you do this? I missed that first ten minutes. He's never going to draw your picture now.
But that's... I can't tell your picture when you're in prison. It's happened to me with True Detective. Actually, I kind of knew about that. I had a high expectation.
I went to it. I was like, oh, there's going to be the new Heathers, which honestly does not hold up well at all. Jawbreaker. I went back and watched Heathers, though. To me, Heathers is still pretty sad.
Oh, man. Right off the bat with the sweaters and the carnigans and the huge hair and just. Well, but Heathers is fucking vicious. Like, Heathers isn't, like, I feel like Jawbreaker was dialed back a little bit. And Mean Girls was even.
Because it was studio, but, like, yeah, and it wanted to be, yeah. So, like, to me, yeah, Heathers is just fucking mean. Like, almost in its weird commentary. He wants to blow up that school. Not, like, the murders, you know?
Like. And the way it addresses everyone is just fucking mean. And I'm like, that's kind of what holds up for me. Let me just sum all that up with Jennifer's body. On that note.
You know what my favorite game to play is in a pool? Oh, God. Marco. If this show is not great, I'm going to spam your Facebook, spam your Twitter. I'm just going to blow you up.
You'll enjoy pieces of it. You'll enjoy pieces of it. I don't want to enjoy pieces of a, I assume, hour-long episodic show. Man, I watched an hour of Marco Polo and ten minutes were so good. Ten minutes were so good.
Oh, but watch it with subtitles because I can't understand anybody. Are they speaking English? Really thick accents? They take some liberties. Is this like.
A BBC joint? Is it really thick Cockney stuff? Kublai Khan is a Chinese actor playing a Mongolian who talks like he's from New York. What? And I can't understand him.
You are selling me on it. Marco Polo is like maybe an Italian actor or a British actor acting Italian. So I can't understand what he says. Hey, it's a me, Marco Polo. Exactly.
But no, watch it. It's good. Watch one. We'll see how that goes. Here's the other show.
And this show. Hannibal. I've heard really good stuff about Hannibal. Have you read the books? No, my mom did.
My mom was really upset with the movies, which I thought was kind of profound. I was like, wow, you don't like the movies because the books are that good? I can't explain. How good the show is and how much it just puts the movies to shame. Because it's like, obviously the books are written like in the 80s or the early 90s or whatever, most of them.
And so it updates them. but keeps the core story the same, like the story and all the characters and their interactions completely the same for the most part. Liberties, um, just updated some fashion, some music, some car models, some hyper updated, you know, fashion decor, but then like. So epically like suicide squad from the perspective of the bad guy. Brilliant. And they do the best job of balancing.
It's not like, Oh, it's a movie about a hero and I want the hero to win. Oh, it's a movie about the villain and I kind of want the villain to win. you teeter because you are like, you get it from both the perspective of the villain and the hero and you're like well i don't want the villain to lose but i don't want the hero to win right and then and then they do the whole like we're just gonna break your heart and take everything away from you including the mother of dragons is this when's this gonna be on the internet Never. A song of fire and ice. No, here's the thing. Ready?
No. Are we going to get into spoilers now? We're going to ruin it. No, I expect it. If you're going to say that, I expect it.
Because my thing is, he made it very clear. Just reading him talking about how he believes good storytelling and stuff goes, he was very, very clear that he does not believe in all good people and all bad people. You know, he believes that, like, period, across the board. Like, no one is all good and no one is all bad, and everyone should almost feel like a good guy and a bad guy, period. Like, there should be moments where you are for someone, and there should always be moments when you're not.
Exactly. Like, at first, Jamie Lannister, you're like, what a douchebag, and then, you know, it spins. But even more so, like, you know, can I be honest? Because, you know, Daenerys feels like she's all good, but I think it's going to get a little twisted. But he made some real cryptic comic recently where– He was talking about how because she's out there on her own, he didn't have a choice for her to even die because the narrative comes from her.
And in the books, some other people are over there now with her. So now apparently he said something like, well, now that other people are around her, I don't have to keep her around. He said something that sounded pretty much like, it's your time to go. And I was like, do you... Not that this should matter at all as an artist.
This should not matter at all. But do you know the amount of people that will quit watching if Daenerys goes? Especially Jon Snow. You might as well bury your books, your TV show, anything, anything. If you kill Jon Snow, it's over.
If Daryl dies, we ride. That's the thing. It's Daryl. It's the thing. It's the Daryl.
And obviously they will sign a petition to bring him back to life. Dude, someone's going to do, like, Misery. On R.R. Martin. Someone's going to kidnap him and, you know, chop his feet off and make him write her back to life.
She's going to become reincarnated as a rainbow dragon or something. Yeah, no, I'm, I mean, when it comes to those books, I'm ready to be disappointed in a way. You won't be from what I hear. Because it's just. You won't be. they're already so brutal.
Like there are, there's so many great people, great, great people that have died, like really great characters that are dead. And it's like, as a story writer, why didn't you want those people? And it seems like you would, these are great personalities. Like, I feel like you're shooting yourself in the foot, but again, you know, like with his whole philosophy, like I heard him say, um, he made some analogy about, you know, well, the reason that you're not tense when you watch diehard is because you know, Bruce Willis isn't going to die. you know Bruce Willis isn't going to die. And he's like, so I kill Bruce Willis right away so that you know that anyone can die.
That's what Ned Stark was. It was like, anyone can die in this. The Joss rules. Yeah. I might take out any cast member I want.
Just saying. So I was like, I get that, but man, there were some really great characters that I can never write about again now. Everyone. Watch it in 10 years, there'll be like the prequels. i don't start you'll get the whole war the crazy king the mad king. Oh well he's already wrote those that's what's crazy everyone's waiting for this whatever sixth book or whatever it is but like he wrote um he wrote a book about he wrote two books technically about the targaryens where it's like and i like i said i do audiobooks i didn't read them but i've listened to both of those he did one that was just this real general history of the entire world You know, it was just, like, going way back.
I mean, like, stuff that literally doesn't even matter now. Like, you know, there's buildings and structures in Westeros that, like, no one even knows who they built. It's like the pyramids for us. It's like these buildings, like, we don't know who built these things. You know, and he just went into this huge back history.
I'm like, dude, you're writing the Cimmerillion before you wrote the trilogy. Focus. Finish the trilogy and then do all the backstory. Like, Or don't waste your time with backstory. Oh my gosh, no doubt.
He wrote recipe books like The Food of Westeros. He's got all these other books out. He's just fucking with the days. I think he's the biggest troll on the planet. I might have made this opinion before where I think he's the biggest troll on the planet.
Imagine if you were the only person that knew what the next three Star Wars movies are going to be. You know everything. You know absolutely everything's going to happen. You would feel a little bit like a geek god. You'd be like, I know, especially if the world knew that.
The world knew that you knew everything. Imagine the attention you would get. He's the only one that knows how this thing is going to end. And I think he likes it too much. He's like, I don't want to tell you.
I don't want to tell you. I'll get around to it when I'm dead. I think they're written in a safe. I think they're written in a safe and it's like in his will or something that when he dies, he'll get released. I'm being a little bit serious.
I think he has already wrote them. He's just going to sit on it for his life and be one of the most famous writers while he's alive. And then when he dies, there'll be something about releasing them after his death. I really think it's completely possible that something like that will happen. He seems very happy to be the only one who knows.
That'd be awesome. You have to bury him like giving a middle finger or something. Next time on the Tangent Show. All right. I think that's what we do.
Wrap it up with another tangent of many. Do you have a special send-off for us, Ben? Nope. Got all excited. Got the feet up in the air.
Getting geared up. All right, fine. Oh, there are. I don't know. We've spiraled off so many times.
Think we just need kind of made sense i don't know if we said it on here but you know there's a couple people from the raid they're gonna be in a star wars movie so you know the tangent going to star wars and then spiraling out of control at least it kind of made sense at first. It spiraled out of control like mark hamill's car right before they made. The second one wow. Fx7 i'm telling you anyway. We really need to script this show.
No, no. That's the beauty of it. It spirals off in the weirdest direction. So is there anything else on The Raid Redemption that we barely scratched the surface of? Good action movie.
I give it a solid four out of five. I dug it. I can definitely see watching that one with the guys. I want to watch the second one and the third one and then the American remake with Leonardo DiCaprio. And Matt Damon.
Because he's thoroughly convinced that's who it's. Going to be. It will be him. It really did feel like a video game to me, though. Like a video game script.
Because it's just so... At least in Dread, it's like. It was based on a comic and stuff, so I'm like, alright, yeah. That's something Dread would do. This one felt forced.
It was like, please go in to do what? Turn down for what? Just a little squad is going to go in to take down a whole building full of mobsters? Why wouldn't you just Like, surround a block. Like, I mean, for real, bring it down.
They had to keep that shit undercover, man. But it just, I don't know. It was all not legal and whatnot. Did you not listen to the story whatsoever? Danny Glover was a bad guy.
I'm getting too old for this shit. Which I really hope Han Solo also works into this episode. I would die. I would die. Oh, but C-3PO did say it was better than Empire Strikes Back, so I'm pumped.
Did he say that? Yeah. That guy? Well, I'm amazed. I just went to check that, because everybody's been talking about the three main actors going back, but I kept going, what about Peter Mayhew?
Yeah, he's in it. But I saw him years ago, and he was in bad shape. He was having trouble walking. Like, he always has. He's got a messed up...
Like, his body's probably not supposed to be like that, but it is. I mean, isn't he just voice acting? Like, I don't think he's... I don't know. That's what I'm asking, because he used to be in the suit every time.
So now I'm like... But not one, two, and three, right? But to me, his face is... You know, like, you could get somebody else in the outfit, but, like, close-up-wise, his face looks like that because it's his face. Yeah.
So I'm like, if you throw somebody else in the makeup and put the face on, it's gonna look different. Like, it's not gonna be chewy. So then I'm afraid it's going to be CG something. I don't know. I'm worried about the chewy aspect of this.
Because, yeah, he's not. Tall people just don't move along. Well, that's the thing. It's pretty amazing that he's made it this long for as huge a guy as he is. Because usually, yeah, there's plenty of them out there that die at 19.
Well, you know what he's going to do. They're going to give him white, chewy hair. They're going to make him go in gray. And then it's a different actor. He's going to have a cool stripe.
It's like a black actor. That's when we get the Gremlins crossover. Nice. Chewbacca's child is stripe. Actually, it's... lumpy are you serious or no does he have children yeah he has children who's a jedi were they in the star wars but the christmas special oh not.
A jedi yeah yeah the lump lumpy's the grandpa. Oh i don't know any of these names jesus do we have to do you remember. Into timothy's own books? You gotta get on Wikipedia now. Oh, God, I do.
When Leia shows up, you know, at the planet and all the other Wookiees are, like, talking English. Like, they have that slurred cat S, but they're all talking English. And you're just like, what the hell's going on? Like, I can totally understand them. You know, I can't understand a thing Chewie says.
And one of them's like, well, you might say Chewie has a speech impediment. Like, are you serious? Chewie, what, has, like, Down syndrome or something? That's her favorite guy. Are you kidding me?
Like, that's your excuse for why you can't understand Chewie? He's got problems? Lord. Like, doesn't it make that kind of extra dark that Han's using him for all these, like, smuggling missions? He kidnapped, like, a Down syndrome Wookiee from Kashyyyk and just, like, trained him to shoot, like, this laser bow.
It's horrible. I thought I saw someone post something about The guy that does the voice of Yoda is going to be back. Does he voice anyone other than Yoda? Because why would Yoda be in this? Because he's a spirit Yoda.
Oh, okay. Yeah, I guess they could do that. Looks like, leave me alone. So does that mean that Haydenson is going to be in as Ghost Anakin? Because he looped him back around in the last version of it.
Oh, no, man. Oh, that hurts. That's kind of rough. Give us Mr. Potato Head.
I'd rather have him. Even Yoda is like, fuck. We've had him on the show. The afterlife, I must spin with this dick. Your mother, you must fuck.
No, I was right. His son is lumpy. Grandpa is itchy. These are canon. Wow.
These are original. From George Lucas. Mala is his wife. I like Mala. The problem I had with it is if once we find out all that stuff, I'm like, well, Chewie's just a terrible father.
He's never around. He's always off on these damn smuggling missions. He's always on the spice mines of Kendor. What the hell's that about? They're garnishing his wages.
That's why he's gotta go smuggle so much. He owes so much to his children and Kashyyyk. He's got like three women he's paying alimony to. Motherfucker, you better get back off that motherfucking Millennium Falcon, motherfucker. It's gonna be like ODB going to get his welfare check.
Cashed on Kashyyyk MTV. Show up in the Falcon, go up. To the Republic to get his But, yeah, looking on there, on the little IMDb thing for seven, he's back in Anthony Daniels and Kenny Baker, which, again, really little people sometimes have health issues. Right? It's awesome that Kenny's still hanging in there, too.
But, yeah, all three of our other main actors. Kenny, this one's for you. Loved you in Harry Potter. Loved you in Time Bandits. Right.
God, Time Bandits. That's one I would say. deserves a remake, but I don't know if you could find seven, eight little guys to do that again. It's like making Labyrinth 2 or something. Which they're supposedly doing. I know, it was a joke.
They shouldn't do it. Jennifer Connelly supposedly already signed on. She's so hot. She was. She was so hot.
She's a cute girl. She's a pretty girl. Don't get me wrong. I still, I don't think I ever really looked for that scene. You don't have to look for it.
I've only seen that movie twice. It's so visually amazing. It's so well filmed. It's so incredible, but it's so depressing. It's so depressing.
I can't watch it again. Every time I go to watch it, I just put in the fountain instead. That's how I feel about bands like Radiohead and Nick Cave. I feel like they're great musicians, but you're so depressing. I can't listen to you.
They're a good song to song, but if you're in a whole album, halfway into the track, you're like, oh my God. It will affect your mood. You need to take Zol off while listening to this. The CD should come with a one-month prescription or something just to kind of help get you over the lump. Green plastic watering can and a fake Chinese rubber plant.
Shut your mouth. It's a great song. Zoloft. Sponsored by Zoloft. Sponsored by Zoloft.
It'd be like Radiohead's next big tour sponsor. I know. That'd be awesome. Zoloft and chocolate. Lord.
It's the Haagen-Dazs tour. It's like if you want to get into the mood where you will like episodes one, two, and three. Any final words for people? See you next time on Trailer Talk. Can't wait for Trailer Trash.
Definitely. That sounds like good stuff. I think so. Just get on YouTube, keep pulling them up, and just keep hating. We'll just maybe pick five, and then we'll spiral for God knows how long.
And then people can send. Us ones they want and meet up next time. Maybe we could even do like, I mean, it's kind of been done before, but we can do the movies where the trailer looked great, but then the movie sucked. So we can kind of watch those trailers and be like, man, this trailer looks like Sucker Punch. We can watch the Sucker Punch trailer and talk about how great this movie looked in the trailer and then how completely terrible it kind of was.
All right. Sounds like a plan. But this one, we need to get the hell out of here. Otherwise, that about does it. We will return next time.
Same geek feed. Thanks for listening. For a fake Chinese rubber plant And a fake plastic gun That. She bought from a rubber man And it's time for the rubber bands To get rid of themselves The world's around. The world's around Where's her out?
Where's her out? She lives with a broken heart A cracked part of styling her mouth. Just crumbles and burns Used to do surgery For girls in the 80s The words amount. The words amount. The words amount.
She keeps sliding. And it wears me out It wears me out It wears me out It wears me out. If I could be who you wanted. If I could be who you wanted. All the time.
All the time. I just want to hear Ben Affleck do the Batman voice. But is he going to? I mean, the old ones didn't really. I need a Batsuit.
I need a robot suit. I mean, how do we survive through all the other Batman and they just kind of. Do I make the suit out of just metal or do I put that green rock in it? See, at least on the Flash TV show, he has a good way to do it. Because he can vibrate his vocal cords and it makes him sound different.
So when he talks. To that chick who knows who he is in the real world. He does this weird echo-y thing because he can vibrate his vocal cords. I was like, that's clever. So he sounds like Perry Farrell when he talks.
So he must give an amazing blowjob. I think that's what that is. He's got a life on the streets. If being the flesh for justice doesn't work out, I'm going to have so many chicks. Think of how many people he could serve us in just a minute.
He's the Flash. You know, I mean, that would work in the ladies too, right? I mean, vibration wouldn't be a bad thing. One day you'll be hard up enough for it. You won't care if it's a boy or a girl.
It's 2015. Is that a basketball diary? It's like 2015. This episode is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced and edited by The Oddity Studios, with opening music performed by The Empires. For more on how to sponsor or support the show, email producer at moviemeltdown.com.
Talk hard!



