Episode 71 - Louie's Mom Remarries

Media Nis. You see that guy with it now he's an actor driver and the only camp driver in his place. Good evening and welcome tonight, mister Walters a taxi podcast. I'm HP your co host and with me as always as my co host, father Malone. Father Malone, how are you this evening?

You better pray for some more powder. Yeah, that's offbeat, That is very off the wall. Well, we're gonna get into that. We're talking Taxi Season four, episode seven, Louis Mom Remarries, written by Earl Pomerantz and directed by James Burrows. Of course I heard him honking at one point in this episode.

He yeah, he, which is surprising because this isn't the biggest knee slapper of an episode. There are some funny moments we'll get into, but but yeah, you can hear him halking a little bit. Reminder, we're doing these shows in broadcast order, not in order of filming. So here father. When we start in the garage, as a Laine is explaining to Tony that they just need to accept that Laka has multiple personalities.

In vic Ferrari is one of them. We're sort of the typical sitcom conversations you drop into. Yeah, what's the term in mediaures Like, it's kind of like, there's no We're just thrust right into this conversation with no real context. Tony is apparently upset because he says Lotka has to work all year, but Vic is the one who gets to take his vacation. Now.

Side note, before we get into this any further, Alex is there too, and he's wearing a green cardigan sweater with a button down collared shirt. Not only is this too dressy for a cab driver father Malone, it makes him look like he's gonna go check out Al's diner before taking Jenny Piccolo out to inspiration point. It's it's I got happy days vibes like crazy from what he's wearing. Oh, I thought he was trying to look young like a preppee. You think, so, just couldn't quite figure it out, Like didn't know where the ayes On store was.

Well, this would have been what eighty one eighty two? So was that the dawn of the preppee? Oh my lacost Okay, Yeah, that makes sense. I guess it's a different for him. We were surrounded by genuine preppees and yumpies in our lifetime HP.

Remember they would some some of them would pop the collar. Hop a fucking collar. Just stab yourself with the tips of those collars, you goons. Oh man, I shuddered to think about repees. My god, not good.

So But anyway, right on que in this conversation, Vic for comes strutting into the fie. It's amazing because I feel like we haven't seen Laca in forever, or or Vic for that matter, and the audience is delighted that they're they're they're cheering, they're clapping. You know what. The audiences of the episodes where Vic Ferrari shows up are getting the most entertaining show possible as far as I'm concerned. Yeah, but it's But it's also easy for me to see why Andy Kaufman would might be getting a little bit bored with playing Laca, because he's becoming the the the the Lenny and Squiggy of the show.

Like they just walk in and everybody's like, whoh yeah, clap, you know, without even having done anything. I think that might have rankled Kaufman's sensibilities a little bit. But but they you know, he's there's no getting around the fact that he's he's so talented, he's so great. Well, you know, I'm sure they had to keep throwing him bones so he wasn't bored playing Lock all the time, because it was kind of baked into this series that he was going to be the Fonsie character. He was going to be the guy everyone cheered when he walked on screen.

But that, you know, that doesn't do anything for him creatively. And thank god they kept giving us these because I will contend, Vic Ferrari is my favorite character on Taxi. He's fantastic, and it was a it was a pleasant surprise for me because I had forgotten that he was a part of this episode because honestly, he You could take Vic Ferrari out of this episode and it would make no difference. It would lose it would it would lose a yellow light. But sure.

But I actually, and this is called out in the Taxi Fan Guide by Frank Love's that his Loaca and Vic's bit in this episode was actually going to be in the Louis Fling episode that we talked about previously, but for for whatever reason, it was flown into this episode instead. And frankly, this episode really needed a shot in the arm, like Vic Ferrari as any episode would. Obviously, Tony asks Vic if he's all set on his vacation, and Vic describes that he's going to go stay at a condo in sugar Loaf, and it makes me wonder, Father Malone, is it the sugar Loaf in Maine or is it the one in Idaho. I think we're led to believe it's the one in Maine because he's talking about skiing, right, yeah, yeah, which I've been.

It is. Yeah, it's definitely the skiing. At one time I was actually would know it now, Father Malone, But I used to snowboard and on several occasions I went up to a sugar Loaf and it's fantastic up there. It's beautiful. I went skiing one time in my life and that was enough for me.

Did you you know we've never talked about that, and all the time I've known you, you only tried skiing once and that was it. That was it. It was good. I discovered it. But I've been back and I was maybe I've been twice.

Actually, Yeah, come to thinking about how I did give it a second go. I'm of the type that we'll do that at least, but I found both to be horrendously uncomfortable, and I just really enjoyed sitting in the lodge. Yeah, that to me is a perfect winter vacation. Having gravity dragged me down the hill on sticks. Not the best, It.

Can be scary. I didn't do any skiing as a child. I never It just wasn't something that was a priority for my parents. But I did later in life when I started dating my now wife, she would take me. I would go snowboarding, and I took lessons and all that, and I got Actually, I would say I got pretty good.

I stopped snowboarding some years later and I just never got back to it. Now I'm probably too old to take it back up, but there is you know, it is fun. I always fretted about getting on and off the ski lift because I didn't want to be one of those assholes who falls and they have to stop the lift and pull you off. It was always very fraught for me to get off the lift. Just another potential in dignity that comes with skiing.

Or just in my case life. I mean, let's be honest. Tony asks Vic how he's going to pay for this vacation, and Vic replies that he's going to have roommates for this vacation. I love this. This this this bit with Vic is awesome because it feels like this little self contained stand up routine, he says.

Vic says he has to find exactly he's got to have four guys. I love this. Yeah, this is kind of the perfect four guys you would take on a bachelor type vacation. It's it and it's so of the time because it's all about like a guy's trip and they're out for for for romance and adventure and all this kind of stuff. So he says, the first guy has to know how to cook.

He has to know how to cook, which ties in with the sort of male, feminine, understanding women aspect that they need, which that surprised me that that was thrown in. So but and if we're where we're boiling it down to a type where we're clearly talking about an Alan Alda type of character, right, somebody who's sensitive, who's sensitive. Joe, Yeah, yeah, any Charles Grienden character from the seventies. Yeah, sensitive, You're right, it's about being sensitive. So that's the first guy.

The second guy has to look good in a turtleneck and play the guitar and then he Vic points to ye he says, name Lymir. And then the third guy has to be a loser so that he can make the rest of the guys look sensitive, like, hey, they brought this schlub up with them. They're taking pity on this guy. They must be good guys, right, And then the best part is that the fourth guy has to be an Austrian guy named Nikki. And Vic says, he said, don't ask me why, but you simply must have one, which is awesome because it's like the mind reels like why do you need an Austrian guy named And then it makes me think that maybe is it like a Schwarzenegger type who looks good at a turtleneck and attracts the women.

Or it's the aloof German student a La Dieter. Who can maybe you know, it has a little bit of an international flavor for the. Wind exactly, maybe a little hyperkinetic, you know, probably wearing something from the decade in the future. Some sort of obnoxiously loud sweater and a turtleneck, and. Maybe everyone's like, oh my god, what is he wearing?

And then twenty years later everyone was like, wow, that look at that guy. Yeah he was so stylish. Yeah exactly. So then at that point, Louis himself saunters in. He's whistling a jaunty tune.

Father Malone and Lane asks him why are using such a good mood, and Louis reports that he had a big fight with his mole last night and things apparently got pretty hostile. He punched her out, and he's telling about it. He gave her a he socked her right in the kisser. So Louis goes on to tell Riager that is his ma. He tells this little story about his mom belongs to this club called and this sounds awful.

Life begins at seventy and it just feels so cringey to me. It's like people saying I'm seventy years young. You just want to punch him right in the face. Yeah, it, but it makes it feel like, you know, when people get so old, they tend to become sort of infantilized. Oh, it's the worst.

I hate that I fought a war, exactly. I was part of the greatest generation. You fuck, You're offering me a cookie like I'm a fucking baby. Do you know that I Banon edited a man. You're putting them in a room with cookies, and you know, I got a little crack.

Let's all do the hokey pokey. Excuse me, it's just cringey. It just makes me feel like, well, what are you doing this. During the depression? This club, Louis goes on to describe it's three women, it's two men, and then he says, it's someone that's so shriveled up.

It's anyone's guess what they are, which is awful, Like that's but that's so Louis. I like that joke. Actually it is. I laughed despite myself the riager, of course, being reager, he counters, and this is so this is so self important of riager. Kind of makes me sick sometimes, he says.

He says that old Louis, old people have a dignity, They have a wisdom, they have a beauty that you will never get close to. There it is, that's exactly what you were talking about. That's the infantilism right there. It is. It's like, oh, you know, they're they're wise and they have so much to share.

And then Louis, like Louis kind of dismisses him by saying, well, look, you would say that, Riager, because you're close to kick in the bucket than any of us are. He goes on to say, louis talking about this club they have guest speakers occasionally, and. Oh, you know what I liked about this scene, HP is that he's telling the story effectively to three people, which is Riger, Elaine, and then Tony. But each of the characters leaves it but it doesn't interrupt his story, which felt like a good joke, but it also felt very very real to me because I've seen people do that, like they're telling the story to the room, and as people like vomos because they can't take the fucking story anymore. He continues just narrowing down the audience and I don't know that really delighted me.

No, that's true, and that doesn't become apparent until maybe the second or third person that he's going to, because first he goes to talk to Riger and he kind of walks away and discussed. Then he talks to Elaine and then Tony. The Tony thing gets weird and we'll get to that in a minute. But yeah, so he starts talking to Riager and then riager, you know, splits. He runs up the stairs and just disappears.

Is that where he goes? Okay? Yeah, and then you know the lane's there. But it's a very strangely empty garage at the same time. Yeah, it feels usually there's some actors behind them that add texture to the scene, you know, these old causures with with the new the page boy caps and stuff.

But there's none of that here. Oh, I should say, Reverend Jim is also there in the background somewhere, so it's four of them. But but it is very empty. It feels like a stage. For the first time it did actually feel like a stage.

It was. It was a little odd that there's very no no activity in there is death. Yeah, no, no bustle, and that's what you need from the garage, a little bit of bustle and a little bit of you know, it gets worse, it gets much worse. We're getting to that. You notice this too.

It sounds like Louis says the club has guest speakers every once in a while, And a few weeks ago a guy came in and showed travel slides, and that guy apparently struck up a friendship with Louis Ma and asked to take her home. And Louis came home from this miserable, hard day's work that he describes, and he walked in on Ma and this other guy. And now they're eventually there. Now they're evidently smitten with each other, these two old folks from this club. Life begins at seventy.

Now, aside, I mentioned this as a side note. You've already described it that people keep disappearing from the story as Louie's talking about it. Now when he gets to Tony, however, here's where things get really weird and downright annoying. He sits in Tony's lap and no one's expecting that, and then when Tony gets up to leave, he clings to him and he's just carried around the garage for the rest of the scene telling this story while Tony tries to shake him off. Now Tony is sitting at the bench in front of the coffee machine, and then Tony does this thing where he throws his lunch bag grenade style as it is distraction in front of Louis, who's not fooled in the least, and then he quick he makes a show of hiding behind the coffee machine.

But what happens when he because I know you're talking about this, Fahlue, what happens when he goes behind the coffee machine? What would the power goes out and then comes back on. No, I didn't you saying the machine went out and then came out. Oh yeah, yeah, Oh you're talking about the set moving. Yes, the brick wall that's behind the coffee machine.

Lunkheaded Tony, just like he did with the pillar, where he did the same thing. He's such a clod hopper that he can't control himself. He goes behind the thing and he makes the set that's meant to look like a brick wall shake, which again completely breaks the verse similitude of the garage and took me out of the scene immediately. But I'm actually fascinated by the fact that you're saying that he also must have unplugged the coffee machine while he was back there. Did it blink on and off or something?

Oh? Yeah, No, And as he went back there, the lights in the front of the machine went off. And then when Danny DeVito turned back around and he was gone and everything had settled, the light came back on. Oh I didn't that that would have been sensed me further beyond the fact that he made the set shake. I mean what it was.

It was all clumsiness. And it's a silly gag anyway, because like, look over there and then you dive behind a coffee machine. Yeah, but he didn't dash. It wasn't like he he like ran. It was very he's fleet of foot man.

He did it very quick. I gotta get Tony that like's I had no as far as surprising things in taxi, I had no idea Tony was going to get up and jump behind a fucking coffee machine. I guess that's fair, that's fair to bring that up. I just couldn't believe that he bumped into that set dressing and it ruined the you know, the the quality of real life that we were used to in this thing. But anyway, so only Vick is left at this point, so Louis continues the story with him.

Louis's last words on the story are that now the guy and Ma this guy that they've struck up a friendship. Now they're talking about marriage. And at the sound of that word, Vic being Vic says check please, you know, and he walks away. So now Jim is the only one left, and and Jim in fact beckons him over to finish the story. And now the climax of the story that he's telling is that Louis and Ma got into an argument about the marriage.

Louis is dead set against it, and he gave his mother an ultimatum and said, if you marry this guy, i am no longer your son, which is fucking terrible fa them alone. Didn't we already do this. We went through this when he put her in a nursing. Home or she left in the fact same. It's somehow worse because in this case, this could be Elaine's says this later on in the episode, This could be Louise's mother's last chance at happiness, and Louis is basically ripping that from her for his own selfish reasons, as we're going to find out.

Yeah, like again, we've seen this part of Louis, We've seen this side of his relationship with his mother, Like there's nothing new going on here, it's just a contrivance. So that there's a marriage involved, and that it's a Japanese and. That made me uncomfortable for a variety of reasons. For a variety of reasons. As soon as they said it, I was like, oh, no, where are we going from here?

And knowing Louis de Palma, I was expecting a flurry of terrible Japanese jokes. Yeah, so kudos Earl Pomerant for curbing that instinct, because I don't think they ended up doing that at all. By the end of the episode, the ceremony, like, I'm not going to ruin things by saying that. They do try to go through with this marriage, and it's a traditional Shinto ceremony and it's actually treated very respectfully, and we'll talk more about that when we get there. So, yes, it has the edge of being based on prejudice on Louie's part, but they, to their credit, they never go as far as you fear they might, especially given the fact that this is eighty one eighty two and this is Louis we're talking about, So thank goodness for that.

So at this point, the rest of the cabbies have filed back on into the garage, and Elaine, hearing this ultimatum that Louis has given, is a ghast and he asked Louis how he can do that to his own mother and This is when Louis says, you know what the worst thing is. The worst thing is that the guy Ma wants to marry is Japanese and he wants to take her to Japan. And that's that's probably an awesome I would. Love to go to Japan. It's one of my bucket lists.

In nineteen eighty one, his elderly mother wants to move to Japan and basically live in the future. Go absolutely, go enjoy life while you still can. Can I visit you? Ma? So Elaine castigates Louis for spoiling, like I said, what could be his mother's last chance and happiness, but Louis plays it off, saying, now Mile, get over it.

She might throw a minor curse at me, but that's it. And just at that point, Louie's mother walks in again, played by DeVito's actual mother that we saw in the episode where he puts her in a nursing home. She's really good in this one. I did not think she was any good in the first time we met her, but I think she's really natural here. She's really good and very very funny.

Her delivery is very good. So she comes in demanding to speak to Louis, who immediately becomes incensed at this development. The other thing cute thing about this father moment before I go any further, is that you really get the sense that Danny DeVito relished the idea of having his mother in a scene with him to play off of, because he can he knows what a character she is, the woman her, you know, the actual his actual mother, and how much she loved being on set. He talks about this in the Love's Book about how she just adored being part of the production. So that's very sweet.

That's a big plus. That's worth a yellow light in my opinion. The interaction, it's. Worth a yellow light, Yeah, because the interaction is so natural and good. Yeah, it easily could have gone the other way.

It could have been Kirk and Eric Douglass. Right, but but it's and it also de Vito or the writers, I guess more than anything, they're not afraid for Louis to like insult her in it been in a very sweet way. And I like that because he still gives as good as he gets when it comes to his mother and vice versa. So she comes in Louis hastily and introduces her to the caves and he demands that they treat her with enormous respect, and Elaine, for one, is thrilled to meet her, and she introduces herself, and the mother, with perfect timing, says well you, and Elaine introduces herself and says, well, I'm Elaine Nardo, and their ma replies, oh, you're Louise girl. You're getting this window into Louise's life outside of the garage, and what.

He's describing his life in the garage is his mother, like who these people are in players in his play. And that becomes effectively like the crux of the scene because each Cavey in turn is being introduced and you're hearing through the mother what Louis is reporting back like his version of events basically, and then having described her as Louis girl like immediately like chills out their interaction and Narda looks rather upset by it. Then next is Alex, who Louise ma knows, as quote the Jewish fella that Loui is always helping out, which I think is great because we know the exact opposite is true. Alex is the one that's dealing with all of that. But and there's also a slight racial edge to the fact that he's described as the Jewish fella, which I think is also a little discomforting, but very much in line with Louis.

Well, I think, I look, if there was a Puerto Rican Cabby, then that would have been, you know, the Puerto Rican Cabby. And the fact that they're Italian is the only reason they don't say to Tony, oh, the Italian, Yeah, the guy. There was a time in a generation of people who would call out your nationality, not because they were putting it down, but just as a means of knowing each other because they had all grown up in this sort of clannishness that they needed to survive in early America. Can I just say that? Yeah?

So then Tony is introduced and Louise Moss says, I can't believe what Louis says about you, and she asks Tony what city are we in? And Tony asked, so he kind of stops and asks if it's a trick question, and Ma turns around to Louis and says, well, I'll be damned because clearly. More than that, this episode is mostly smartly written. When it comes to the dialogue. Yeah, the stuff with with Louis and the mother is really cute in its gold.

It doesn't mean the rest of the episode can support that, but that is very Nevertheless, Tony is smiling and he asks he's eager to try out some Italian on Louis Ma. So he says, you know what, He's eager to try out Italian. I wish his character had just been fluent in Italian and then they could talk back and forth because it seems like, I don't know, it just seems weird, like she gets excited that he speaks Italian, but she would just be like, you don't even speak Italian when he was this halting bullshit. I chalk that up maybe to the fact that Tony Danza just didn't know how to speak Italian. I know, but you could break it down phonetically.

I've seen fucking Bella Legosi speaking Spanish as d. That's a good point. So he he he says something to her, and her response like alarms Tony. He's taken aback and Alex asks what she said, and Tony says, uh, well, my Italian's a little rusty, but I think she said her son's acting like a jackass. Or or an asparagus.

Yeah, yeah, it's probably Jackass. I'd like I'd like to think that Italian. In Italian, the difference between Jackass and asparagus is very slim. But I don't know for sure. Maybe a listener who speaks Italian can let us know if that's an actual joke or just a writerly joke for a television series in the seventies or early eighties.

Well, I'll tell you what I'm gonna. I'm gonna take the hit now and I'm gonna go to translate, do Google dot com, and I will tell you what it is. We're gonna We're gonna debunk this once and for all. Bottom Lawns search of episode with le DEMI shout out to a different show. Let's do English.

Let's say, what did I say, Jackass? Yes, Jackass in. Italian Jackass is Stronzo Stronotronso how do you say asparagus asparagus? Asparagus in Italian is asparago? So well then that's unfor that's a right early seventies joke.

What a drag. They should have found something that sounded like Stronzo. That's equally ridiculous. I mean, there's gotta be something. Jim asks about the new cabby he's referring to.

He doesn't realize that it's Luise mod which is really funny. They should have put her in a cab for a couple of episodes, remember when they used to, Remember when they used to go out and pick up customers on this show and they would have little adventures because it's a show about cab drivers. We talked a little bit about this offline fora the Malone and and I'm forced to admit here we are We're seven episodes into the fourth season, and I think that the show is struggling a little bit. I think we can take a moment here to admit that the just like what you just said, Like this show used to be about these funny little adventures that would go on and then the interactions they would have with customers and what would happen.

But now we get precious little of that lately, and it's more about their exterior lives more so than their cabby lives. That's not a good development here. No, it's just another office comedy. Now. You know, when I was a kid and heard that they had canceled Taxi, I sort of railed against it, but now rewatching it as an adult.

If I was an executive at NBC, I'd be like, uh, yeah, I think we can. I think we're good. I think they've said everything they're going to say. They're in the Sunshine Cab Company. Well, it is fascinating because I can't think of the last time I watched all of these episodes in sequence, one after the other, and now that this series of podcasts demands it, I'm forced to agree with you there, which is they can't all be gems, certainly, but there's there's more more misses than hits lately, and I hope we can pull out of this a little bit soon.

I think we will because I know we've got some characters coming up that are beloved that will improve the situation. But I think I think it's totally worthwhile to take a moment and acknowledge that the show really hasn't been so hot for maybe the last few episodes. The taxi equivalent of a pregnancy is coming up. They're going to add Simca. So it's like the Cousin Oliver.

Situationally, they need some fresh blood here in the in the Cab Company. Yeah, but unlike that, it did the gambit actually worked one hundred percent here. Like oh usually, yeah, she's so fucking she's just a force of nature, like she definitely she brings up everyone's performance. It seems, Yeah, we're almost there, we're getting there. We talked about Jim thinks that she's a she's a cabby and a.

Laine corrects Jim that it's actually Louie's mother. Jim compliments Louis and walks off in a daze, which prompts Louise Ma to say, you let him drive a cab when you think about it, She's not wrong. No. In this episode, in particular, Jim is completely burned out. This is actually one of my favorite iterations of Jim, like the total burnout who just wanders up and says, well, he'll never have what I have, which you.

Just don't know that's true until we get to the wedding ceremony where it's like a complete one to eighty from that. But we'll get there. Right because he's both things. Yeah, yeah, no, it's you get this to sort of see both sides of them, And I agree, we're really getting a burnout Jim during this garage sort of scene. So Ma insists to Louis that she wants to marry mister Fujimoto, who is the gentleman that's been spending so much time with her.

Louis continues to push back against this idea. MA asks Louis to simply just me meet him, meet this guy, and if Louis doesn't like him, she won't marry him. She promises this to Louis, and Louis says, what I have to lose, of course I'll meet him. And then we cut to where else do we cut to? Father alone when anyone has a a sort of meeting or or something they have to you know, catch up with somebody over food, of course, it's.

Well, it's a broll fest of Marios again. It is all the sad, old, tired b roll. Although at least we don't get the same b roll of the Fonzie doppelganger walking in with his friend. No, we gave the other one of the guy walking out. It's we've seen this guy, believe Mario, there's a million times now.

Well, he's probably a cabby, that's why he's always away there, So we cut inside. Marios and Louis and Ma are seated at a table and a very I gotta say, A very distinguished looking mister Fujimoto walks in. He's smiling. He looks every bit the sweet old man who just wants nothing but the best for his bride to be Louis Mom. So he he's smiling.

He comes over to the table, he's complimenting Louis Mom over and over again. He just seems so sweet. Gabrielle is her name, we find that out here and his but his show of affection towards Gabriella, Louis Ma puts off Louis. So Ma introduces mister Fujimoto to Louis, and Ma insists that Louis bao, which seems a little bit over the top because mister Fujimoto is a Japanese American. He's not.

He didn't come in wearing traditional Japanese garb. He comes in wearing a handsome, you know, three piece suit. He looks swathing. But we're also about to see a Shinto wedding and then he's going to spirit her off to Japan. True, but but just because he's he's observing.

If this is the clumsy bit of Japanese nonsense that the episode is going to indulge in. I'm going to allow it. That's true that they could have been a lot worse. So I guess, like a good lawyer, I'll allow it. So Jerry, Jerry Fujikawa here, who's playing the bridegroom is little inside Baseball HP and I were just talking about Shatner versus Nimoy over on our our away missions for our Star trek Fest for midnight viewing my show, and we're talking.

Yeah, we were talking about how Shatner and Nimoy were both on the Twilight Zone and Nimoy was in this particularly racist episode called A Quality of Mercy where Dean Stockwell is the leader of a platoon that Nimoy is part of and they have pinned down a Japanese squadron. The leader of the Japanese squadron was Jerry Fujikawa. Who is the guy here? Really? Yeah, I had no idea that that was the case.

Was he old in that episode already? No? He was, you know, it was nearly thirty years earlier, well, twenty, it was twenty years earlier, so he was, you know, an older man, but he didn't look he certainly didn't look like a septagenarian. Yeah. Here, he's every bit.

You know, the the the match for Louis Ma in terms of being old and distinguished in. The seventies, must have done a fucking number on him. Apparently he seems like the sweetest guy, which which is a nice contrast to Louis, who is putting a sigh any potential prejudice that he's feeling. He just ultimately just doesn't want anybody taking his Ma away from them. Basically, that's the crux of Louie's dilemma here.

That's all we find out that he's trying to avoid. So he and Louis, mister Fujimoto and Louis go to another table to chat and my announces that she's just gonna sit there and smoke, which I've read some of the behind the scenes stuff that was one of her hobbies. Basically was just smoking her ass off, and that's true to life. It reminded me of that, you know, in our lifetime. I remember, you know, plenty of people smoking.

We could still smoke in restaurants, you could smoke everywhere. When I moved and when you know, we were in our twenties. Basically, I remember going to Callahan's in Santa Monica and just and as a smoker, being disgusted at how much smoke there was in the restaurant. Oh, it's ridiculous. I remember being as a child being on a plane.

Oh my god, it was just a choke fest. It was like, So there's that scene at the beginning of Citizen Kane where they're watching the news on the march and it stops and the screening room is just filled with smoke and it's all over exposed. What looks super smoky. That's what the airplane looked like because they were This was also a time when the in flight movie was actually projected onto a screen at the front of the cabin, so you had like the tracer from all the smoke of the beamed image. It was remarkably unhealthy and gross, just disgusting.

But it's like what you're describing, where it's even a smoker might go, this is awful. What are we doing to ourselves? So she's she's smoking at her table while Louie's talking with this gentleman and he immediately Louis asks him if he's known any other women, and mister Fujimoto says, yeah, of course, I'm eighty three years old. Of course I have, and then Louis kind of barks back at his mo, like, hey, he's pillowed to any women. Ma, this guy's no good for you.

But Ma ultimately goes against her promise not to marry the guy and insists that they will be married, and Louis reminds her of his threat to no longer be her son, to which she says, look, I'm sorry, then gets up and beckons mister Fujimoto to leave with her, but not before turning around and saying sayonara to Louis, which is a nice touch, nice button to the scene, and then we fade the black, fade the commercial. And now Louie has divided the apartment in half. That'll be your half, Ma, and mister Fujimoto, this will be my half over here. Oh my god, my hair has turned red from the tonic you sold me. Ma.

Wait, there's somebody at school who looks just like me and we both have dates. But now we're mixed up, and now I gotta pretend to be you, and you've gotta. Pretend to fool Ma, and I'm gonna fool mister food Gimona. We've described like half of season three of Brady Bunch basically. But it was the sort of repository for every sitcom contrivance that ended up on the Brady.

Bunch, including, like we said, cousin Oliver, who's the classic example of the you know the kid you bring in when all the other actors have aged out of being cute. Even though they were still dressing Cindy and little baby doll dresses like she's a little girl at this point, like she's not a tiny child. We fade back in there. We're back at the garage where a gussied up Jim and Alex are staring at Louise's cage, which has all the shades down. We've seen sometimes he puts the shades down for comic effect or whatever.

And there's this ar You know, there's one thing that Taxi does consistently poorly, Father Malone. It's a d R. It's looped dialogue, and this is no exception with Alex. Are yeah, yeah, they u Alex in a voiceover saying it's unbelievable that Louis is now living in the garage. There's no other way, apparently, of conveying the notion that Louie is now having to live in the garage because he's not living with his mother anymore.

It's really bad. It sounds terrible, that's terrible. And then the setup itself is really fucking stupid, because all I kept thinking, as they're like waking him up, as if the garage that we've seen for four fucking seasons now is a twenty four hour operation. Seems to be shut down so Louie can have a bedroom in the cage, aren't what's not going on upstairs? But the office is upstairs?

Like it just logistically doesn't make any sense here. Well, what's odd is we already talked about the fact that the garage at the beginning seemed to be oddly empty, devoid of any hustle and bustle, and that continues here because aside from from Louis and Alex and Jim, there's nobody else in the garage and there's really no ind I mean, I guess we're led to believe that it's the morning because Louise is getting up and taking a shower and getting himself ready for the day, but it's there's there's no I consistently use the word for similitude when I talk about the garage, because it there are times during the course of the show where it did feel like a real place. That's the goal of the set, right, But in this episode, in particular, putting aside the fact that Claude Hopper Tony is bumping into walls and making things turn off and on, this doesn't feel like a real This feels like a like a set for maybe the first time in a long time.

And that's very dismaying. Yeah, And like I said, it just does. It just feels like it feels like a clubhouse. It doesn't feel like a cab company anymore. It's not a business anymore, at least Central Perk.

It's it is. It's mister Carter's classroom. It's it's just a place to hang out. It's there's nothing really that distinguishes it from any other clubhouse. To your point, Vic, at this point, barrels in.

Now he's he's clad in a loud Ski sweater, he's toting some ski boots, he's got a suitcase. Vic asks Alex to tell Louis that he's going to leave early so he can beat the weekend traffic. Now, the thing of it is, when I more I think about it, this has to be Maine because he's driving from New York, so it's not that crazy of a trip, right, He's just going to drive from there to Maine a few hours, what have you. Yeah, it's like a four hour drive. But he's definitely not going to fucking Idaho.

No, And upon reflection, I don't think Idaho. The one in Idaho is known for its skiing. I think it's more about hiking. But he's clearly going skiing. That's his that's his goal.

So Alex asks Vic if he found all the roommates that he was looking for. We talked about those the four perfect roommates that he needs to assemble, and and then Vic said, Vica shore is Alex that the team is assembled and they're on their way to quote, a holiday of hormones, which sounds terrible. That's my editorial there. And then Vic departs, and that's the last we see of you know what. I was expecting a really easy joke about the four people he found were his personalities.

It could have been You're right, it could have been like the people he's describing, you know, could one could have been locked, one could have been one, you know what I mean, Like I just I thought that was a missed opportunity. Yeah, that would have extended the bit. He could have been like, oh, and I found a guy you know you want to meet, you want to meet the whatever, Nikki, the Austrian, And he could have been like, you could have put on an Austrian accent. Yeah, something, I don't know. He could have done it.

So anyway, he vic is in and out so quickly, but he's never not a welcome presence on the show, even if his bit adds nothing to the main a plot of this, let's be honest. So then the sound of an alarm clock emits from the cage and you hear Louis waking up. He's sputtering, he's grumbling. The shades come up and you can see that he's wearing like a tattered bathrobe, and Louis asks why they're all dressed up, and Alex reminds Louis that they're going to see louis Ma's wedding. Louis corrects them.

He says, I don't have a mother anymore, and he walked. He walks out towards the bathroom and he's got Louis has a soap on a rope that he's swinging around his hand. You remember, first of all, do you remember when soap on a rope was a thing for them? Oh? Yeah, what was the.

Deal with it? I really wanted one, but we never got one. But ultimately, I don't know what the deal would have been like there was such an epidemic of dropping the soap, and then of course there's the whole prison joke aspect of it. What why was soap on a rope a thing? Was that?

This is the time of pet rocks? And yeah, I guess we have a lot to answer for pop culture wise at that time. But it never made sense to me because you can't use the soap while it's hanging around your head. You can't wash your whole body with it, So you're meant to take it off and then put it back on when you're done. Yeah, I guess.

So it's strange. Wouldn't that mean? Can't you just hang it on a hook in. Your But then you might as well keep it in a soap dish and little nook of your shower. I mean, there's no real reason for it.

So they created a need. Good for them, they did, But there is a good joke here that I want to call out. I don't often like to call out the jokes because they're not't funny when you retell them, or at least as far as I do it. But he's got this soap on a rope and he's sort of Louis sort of swinging it almost like a purse, kind of like he's swinging it as he's walking, and Jim makes this funny comment that he's walking the soap and it's such a stupid joke, but it it's so it just cracked me up. It's so out of left field, and it has no bearing on their conversation.

I just thought it was a funny observation on Jim's part. I don't know. I just thought it was it was really funny. Perhaps an improv. Could be could be was that maybe was at the point at which Burrows was honking with laughter.

Or it was during that scene, which was good that it elicited something other than anger at the stupidity of the setup. Yeah, absolutely so. So he Alex is yelling after Louis, who who disappears into the bathroom. He's trying to convince Louis to go to the wedding, and then after a minute or so, Louis comes out. He now he's like swathed in towels and he's dripping wet.

I don't know how he could have showered that quickly, because it's it's literally five seconds after he walked into the bathroom. With a bucket of water he had waiting for him. I guess he just maybe he went to one of those safety sinks and just splashed himself with it, you know, like the the eye protection thing where the eyewashed station. Maybe he went there moist talents, I. Guess, but he's but he's he's sopping wet.

They're not moist horse bath? What a horse path? What is that? I've never heard that. It's like a sponge bath.

He's just basically, you know, God. I can't believe you just said that. I've never heard that term. Look it up, man, I I guess I will after this episode. That's incredible father alone.

Wow. Louis tells Alex that he and Ma. This is where he gets to the heart of his uh is his problem with this marriage. He says he and Ma had a an unspoken deal and mass thrown that all away. Apparently they were meant, you know, to be together.

In some way, shape or form. Alex is incredulous. He says, like, what, Louis, you were never going to get married or to spend your whole life with your ma. And Louise says, yeah, sure, I might have gotten married, but I would always have a place. I always have a room for my Ma.

Ma is busting up their their their team, and. Yeah, seen this before, man, but this was the exact same fucking thing from the Ma left me and I don't know what to do with myself and she was my best friend and it's. One hundred percent. But but the difference is we don't have that great scene with the Louis and his party and those weirdos that were sitting on his couch. That's true.

That elevated that one. It really did. It was such a small thing, but it meant so much to that scene. But so, yeah, Louie is griping about the fact that it's like those wedding bells are breaking up that old gang of mine, but it's Louis's version of it, right, So uh but but Louis says, well, you know she's breaking us up. Yet I'm the bad guy and I'm the one whose life is getting up ended here.

But finally Alex convinces Louis to go in appreciation for all that his mother done for him. But Louis is still afraid that of what he'll do when he gets there. He's afraid he won't control himself and he'll say something or do something that will ruin the occasion. So Alex tells him I'll handle that. You trust me, and it'll be fine, And Louis decides to go, and Louis says, I feel great because whatever awful, disgusting thing he does, Louis says, it'll be Riaga's fault, which I think is actually a great setup, but it doesn't pay off at all.

No. No, they want this scene to be about Louis like bubbling over during the ceremony, but they end up paying such fealty to the ceremony itself that it's hard to like mine any comedy out of it. Yeah, but in fairness, because they're they're treating the Shinto ceremony with such respect. I for what I was looking for, Sure, I don't. I don't blame the writers or the director for being fearful that they were going to come off as this disrespectful to the sanctity of that ceremony, So that would have been a tough line for them to walk in any event.

But you're right, ultimately the joke doesn't pay off. It should have been Louis seething and bubbling with rage and Reader having to go through all these lengths to. Keep clapping his his hand over his mouth, like holding him down. Like it should have been a whole physical comedies too. Yeah, but it doesn't go.

We don't go there at all. So now, and this is the rarest of rarities. Father alone, we fade into b Roll that I am quite certain we have never seen it, and we may never see again. I doubt we will. Yeah, I was shocked, actual brand new b Roll.

It was like, oh my heart, it was incredible. I think this was like like like clip art. I think this was just I don't think this was something they filmed on their own. I think this was just. No, they went to the stockpile and say give me stock dish, Yeah, give us, give me a Japanese temple.

And they found one guy standing outside a Japanese temple and that's it. Don't work. Yeah, it's the outside, it's the exterior of the Japanese temple that were led to understand is where where the wedding is taking place. So we cut inside, and I gotta say that the art direction, the set decorators have had their ups and downs over the course of four seasons. This was actually, I thought a pretty decent stab at the interior of the temple.

There's there's paper doors everywhere. There's okay, they're on a Tommy matt. They could have done the same on threes company Like there was no they didn't go above and beyond like they usually do. Remember that gymnasium with the paintings, arrows everywhere, and this is a Shinto shrine that they could be fucking up man, and they're just like, well up some paper walls and some Tommy's. So it may not have had the texture of that the spelling Bee Gymnasium, but what it did have was scale, like it looked Yeah, it looked big because there's probably all together, there's like, aside from the Cabby's who are all sort of sitting on the left hand side, there's there's a whole other group of people that their backs are to us, that are facing forward.

There's probably another fifteen people sitting there, and then there's all these attendants and the ceremony gets underway, so it's suitably it felt like a large or a medium sized Shinto church, not that I've ever been in one, but it felt that part of it felt pretty authentic. But you're right, it doesn't require a ton of set decoration to throw a mat down. It's fine, it's fine. I didn't have a serviceable for tax. Yeah, I mean, I'm not expecting a bit a Corrosama film here.

Sure, but I didn't think that they completely cheaped out on it and it was in authentic. I thought it was you know, I would give it a B minus put it that way. Like I said, there's a pretty decent turnout. The cabbys are sitting at stage left with Louis, who's already disgusted with everything. Jim.

Now here's where we get into something interesting. Now we talked about Jim being extra spacey and burnt out during the early part of this episode. Now he has taken he because he's the spiritual one out of the group. He is the one to explain the ceremony and what it means, and what the meaning of a lot of what's happening is and and so he he but when he talks, he's not talking in that sort of burnt out Jim bubble speak. He's talking like a very clear headed, respectful, observant student of religion that he really kind of is.

This is Jim's one thing where he can focus up and be the guy that he was before he dropped out completely. Right, so he able to like kind of get it together for this and he's in his element. Yeah, So he narrates each of the actions. It's great. It's one of my favorite things in the episode.

It is fantastic. It's very very cool. So he he says to the Caves that this is going to be such a moving ceremony. He says, a Shinto wedding is one of the three best ways to get married. I love this little bit because it's it's cute, it's not a laughing and it's true, but it is true.

So he says the best ways are a Polish wedding for the dancing, Shinto for the poetry, and naturally, Alex is curious and he says, well, what's the third way, and Jim replies vegas, which gets a laugh, and he says, for the glitter. Obviously a Vegas wedding for you, Father Malone is near and dear to your heart. So you know, I thought it was. I was there. I saw you married by Dracula on my strip.

I saw you there dress as ed Wood. It was. It was one one of the most remarkable experiences of my life to be at that wedding, because Vegas weddings are often talked about by people and scene and movies and TV shows, but rarely this one get the opportunity to not only be of the be at one of these weddings, but actually one of your requirements was everyone had to dress up, so I dressed up as a zombie. One of our friends from high school was a drugue from Cockwock Orange. Another was a director who actually happened to be a real director who I won't name names, but he was actually a real director that was a friend of yours from California.

So it was a very cool experience. It was a lot of glitter, it was. It was fantastic. I mean, it was just one of those experiences that I'll remember forever. So Jim is being He's very down to earth, very respectful, very spiritual about this whole thing.

So but Louis Meanwhile, Louie can barely control himself, but Alex is keeping him in check. Now, Jim starts to narrate the wedding as it proceeds. There's attendance that come in, and there's you know, there's all this. At one point there they're waiving fans to keep the demons away. It's very interesting, and it's my understanding.

I read in Love's's book that Earl Promorance actually did the research to make it as authentic as it could possibly be given the fact that it's the sitcom and it's the tail end of the episode. That's why Jim is narrating it, because the writer actually went out and just fucking work and now you have to hear it. It's right. He wants to prove the effort that went into this, right, Mister Fujimoto and Louis Ma come out, and Ma is resplendent. She's in a full kimono.

She's in like a like a kind of a geishaw wig sort of thing. I don't know if that's accurate or if I'm being insensitive, but it's sort of like it's this black, this dark black wig that she's wearing the total Japanese finery. They're both her and mister Fujimoto are wearing. It's it's it's awesome. Louis doesn't even recognize her first, and then the wedding ceremony proceeds.

As I said, Jim is. As Jim is narrating, he actually peacocks a little bit to your point earlier, and he says, it's nice to be the smart one, which is such a cute thing for Jim to say, because you know that he's so used to being the one who is always a step behind, not keeping up with the conversation or just in a fog. This is the one situation dismissed and you know, kind of like not ignored, but considered you know less then And in this case, this is him and his element. This is something where he can project real authority, and I'm here for it. I thought it was fantastic.

He's speaking as confidently and as elegantly Father Malone as I think I've ever heard Jim speak about anything in the show. So that's pretty remarkable. And it's a credit to Christopher Lloyd once again. He can show you all of these sides of Jim. There's many sides to him, not just the burnout.

Finally, it's time for the couple to drink a special tea and Jim tells Louis that once they've drank the tea three times, they're officially married. So then Louis Ma gets the two SIPs and Louis decides he's got to say something, he needs to stop it. But as he approaches his ma, the Ma tells him too late because she already had her third sip. It's really funny. She's just like, you know, too late for you.

Louis then announces, well in that case, and you sort of figure he's gonna put his foot down and say, then I guess I'm not your son anymore. But he does something interesting here, he says in that case, and then it becomes a tender moment and he leans in and says, I give you my blessing, to which Ma says something very sweet back to him in an Italian something like thank you, you know, sweet one or something, I don't know what she says, and they kiss and she thanks to him again in Italian. As the episode ends at that point, and it's that's where. We go with a tender moment alone age. I didn't know you were such a fan of Billy Joel there father alone.

He's appropriate for this episode. It is, you know, just like Vienna weights Man. This is cornball heaven right here. That is the episode. Now we're going to talk about yellow lights.

What doesn't yellow light me? Remindered everybody, we score on a scale of one to five yellow lights. One is the worst taxi episode and five is the best, and as is our custom also, but we throw it to you first, what do you give Louise's mom remarries? Look, even though this episode sort of devolves into the worst kind of sitcom tropes and it has a bunch of barely their plot lines intersecting, what it does have is Vic Ferrari. So it's getting three yellow lights from me.

This was a tough one for me, fallom alone, because I always talk about the rewatchability of an episode, and that goes a long way towards me getting it a favorable score. This is not one that I watch on occasion if I'm if I have a free moment, I want to watch a little taxi. This isn't one that I traditionally pop in. But we already talked about the fact that vic alone is worth one yellow light. We also mentioned that the interaction between Louie's mother and him is worth another yellow light.

So we're already up to two yellow lights, and I think there's enough stuff with Reverend Jim showing another side to himself, which is which is very good. It is SITCOMI is all get out and there's no getting past that. But I mean, this is a This is an occasion where I kind of wish that we had said we could do half lights, because I would have given this a solid two and a half. But we don't. We don't have luxury, So I'm gonna agree with you.

I'm gonna give this one three yellow lights as well. This isn't a terrible episode by any stretch, but it just feels too constrained to one note for me to really give it like a great score. But that's not I mean, it's a little better than average. I think that's fair. But if you take away those two elements, those two yellow lights, you're left with a one yellow light episode.

So bear that in mind, listener, when you go back to watch this, Like two of our yellow lights are purely based on cosmetic issues, it's worth it just. To see Danny DeVito's real life mother get to stretch a little bit more and show more of her personality. I think it's worth it just for that, but not much after that. So three yellow lights from myself, three yellow lights from Father Malone. That's going to do it for this episode of Night, Mister Walters, Father Malone, Where can folks find you when you're not clocked into the garage?

Well, I have a show called Midnight Viewing. It's on twice a week every Friday. It's the Malone's Weekly round Up where I look at things that are currently streaming or in cinemas. And every Monday it's either a horror anthology television series with Mike White from the Projection with or it's a fest with HP. Right here, we're currently wrapping up Star Trek Fest and right there on the horizon I can see it.

It's Von Doom Fest. So check us out over there. I've had the pleasure of working on a few fests with Father Malone. We we we we did Predator Fest. We've covered the Predator series of movies, and I thought that was wonderful.

That was such a that was such such fun to do. But I got to say Father Malone has topped himself with Trek Fest. It's been an absolute pleasure to do, and I've learned a lot, and I think anyone who has a even a passing interest in Star Trek should always We really owe it to themselves to give this a try. We're we're covering the movies we've come. We have a separate series called Away Missions, which involve projects that Nimoy and Chatner did that are outside of Star Trek that we talk about.

Colombo we talked about It's it's fabulous, so please give it a try. I don't think you'll be disappointed. As for myself, I also host the Noise Junkies music podcast, and I also have a bandcampsite Hpmusicplace dot bandcamp dot com. Please check that out for any of my musical nonsense. Please feel free to subscribe to the podcast, to write a review or rate us.

We'd love to hear from you. The email address for that is Hpmusicplace at gmail dot com. Once again, for Father Malone to myself, thanks so much for listening and we'll see you all next time. Nis