Episode 23: Marco (1973)

Welcome to ranking on Bass and offhand joke that became a podcast that just won't die. I'm your host. Mike White joined me is a man who flies on red kites. Mister christas Shoe. My parents also happened to be much more talented than me.

Isn't that a shame? Also along for the ride is someone who sings all about spaghetti, mister Richard hadham My dab as I say, is Sean Aston my son? Is that also a thing? On this podcast, we are discussing the works of Arthur Mankin Junior and Jules Bass, specifically some of their stop motion and animated work or in this case, a live action film with just a little sprinkling of Vana magic in there. Yes it is Marco.

It is one true, fully accurate, vetted and improved the approved life story of Marco Polo, starring that stalwart of acting, singing and dancing prowess. Desi Arnez Junior. You wanted to throw the junior in there? Huh, you had to put the If it had been it would have been something. Yes, I mean it's already something, something that exists in a world not of our own.

So now I know we're sort of starting way behind the starting line. When I ask you, have you guys seen the Any Polar documentary about Lucian Desi. I have not. Oh it's great, okay, so check it out now. Now this year you've had for Lucian Desi fans, you've had the the Aaron Sorkin fictionalized sort of story of Lucian Desi, where Javier Bardem I believe played Yes, yeah, senior could basic Grande.

Yeah, yeah, you know, and I thought I thought he did a good job than Nicole Kidman. I don't know, but Richard, it's it's the makeup for me really that makes her look like an alien. That's kind of the prop. Well, Lucio Ball's own makeup made Lucio Ball look like an alien. Yeah, but it's like something about the smooth face.

I don't look like she look like Nicole Kidman was wearing a Lucio Ball mask. But I would only recommend it so that you can see JK. Simmons play James Murty. Oh yeah, sorry, William Frowley, Fred Murtz. But if you can only watch one, watch the Any Polar documentary if you're interested in Lucy and Desi and I Love Lucy at all.

It's really fascinating and and actually super emotional, and you'll get you'll get a I mean, you'll know everything you need to know about that couple, I think. But anyway, that couple had a child on I Love Lucy. That child was a son in real life and on the show, and that kid grew up to be Marco Polo. Amazing stuff. We are a true story of our times and here we are and that was fifty years ago.

Yeah, so this one was written by Aaron Sorkin. There's a lot of walking and talking. How can you imagine this? Who did a lot of rank and a bass apparently right? That was really that snippy dialogue that gave it away.

No, of course it was written by Romeo Muller, who worked with Rank and em Bass all the time, directed, co directed. He doesn't get a credit on the film by Suko Nubil Kotani or Tom Kotani. I think a lot of people called him. We've talked about him many times before. And the credited director is Seymour Robbie, who has done a ton of stuff, my god, including at least one episode of Cold Check Chris.

He did the Century episode that's the one with the big fake dinosaur running around the lizard man underneath the city. I believe. Oh man, the show sounds. The show is so goofy sounding at a context. I love it.

I know I have a feeling one of you guys is probably staring at his IMDb right now. Did he do a bunch of Remington's steels? He did do some Remington steels. Yes, I do remember from looking him up before. Okay, Okay, that's because I'm like, I know I've seen that name recently, and it's because there's been a lot of watching of Remington Steel recently, because well, you know, my wife Susan Lambert's working on this podcast called Eighties TV Ladies, and Stephanie Zimbolist is one of the ladies.

She's actually, by the way, guys, banking two episodes today. It's happening right now. Whoa, It's it's podcast season at the HadAM House. Welcome home, ladies and gentlemen. We've invaded their lives and ruined them.

Goopletely see Richard lives in the land where everybody does have a podcast. Didn't make that joke where fucking I live? But where you live. Wow, that's a different story. I do I do our podcast, the three of us, she does her podcast, and then later on the two of us we do our podcast.

But we don't record it. We just do it. Oh wow, birds do it, bees do it. Everyone's podcasting. Yeah, So, man, where to start with this one?

I know, Chris, you have thoughts, So I mean the thoughts other than Co running around on this kind I mean, because we kind of start. We don't start with Marco Polo in Italy and coming down the Silk Road with his brothers. He's already in China, question mark. I'm guessing it's China, though most of the casting here are Japanese people or white people wearing yellow face. Whoa, whoa, Well, you're telling me zero Moste, a name sounding more Jewish than anything else, is not, in fact Mongolian.

It's it's tough to believe. This is a shocking piece of information. I feel like I have been duped, just duped. Look you guys and your woke. Yeah, politics, that's what it is, you know.

I like black dwarves on Lord of the Rings. Ah. I just can't fathom a Jew playing an Asian character. Row, Why did you ever ruin Chris Chris's childhood right right. Look, if we if we think about this in the context of a musical from the seventies, that almost like it's like, oh like there could have been a stage version of this, yeah, oh yeah, yeah with songs.

You know, it's like, well, all right, yes, you know Rex Harrison probably did King and I. Your Brenner did King King and I. Brenner's that Asian, remotely Asian, I'm going but no, but your Brenner is not, you know, Cologne, your British like Rex Harris, like you can find more offensive example, yes, oh yeah, I mean Jewish, classically trained Jewish stage actor playing Kubla Khan is not remotely offensive. And he's not even like not a remotely offensive, Like they don't have him unable to pronounce his rs. You know what I mean.

There's none of that. There's none of that in this, Thank goodness, so yeah, basically presenting as as Zero Mustell in a mumu with a droopy mustache and fingernail oh the metal fingers. Yeah fu to be there. As an Italian, I feel personally attacked because that entire spaghetti song is is who the fuck thought that was a good idea, like just you know, you mentioned this as a musical. The music, and this is is an affront to common like it's it's bad in a fun way, like it will not have you besmirched the name of Murray Laws and by damn the music goal the viciousness with which you attack the man who brought us.

You know, we're a couple of misfits, right. You know what when Marco polo Is is copping lines from Frosty the Snowman, that's when we have a problem. I was waiting for Jackie Vernon to just show up. Fuck, I'm gonna I'm gonna throw down the gaunt. I liked Marco good.

I enjoyed it too, But it's not good. Oh it was so much fun. It was a lot of like, yeah, it was so much it was. This was the most fun I've had watching something for this show in quite some time. Like everything else has been like badened like a middling way, or like, oh, this is like a genre film, like all those whatever Dinosaur and Ivory Ape and they're all kind in the same mold.

Like this is just bizarre, like just straight up one of the weirdest things I've seen, but also one of the most fun things I've seen a very long time. Oh yeah, yeah. Like there's a little bit of internet chatter surfaced about this, was saying, oh, it's so dull, and you know, look, there's you could have you know, I could have gone through this and with a red pen. But but the spirit of it and what it's trying to do, and I would say a small handful of surprises along the way which are super insulting. Oh my god, in heaven, I was.

I was like, Okay, Jack Weston could not be more charming. Oh yeah, yeah, Desi Arnez could not be more David Cassidy esque in his long haired brunette seventies heartthrob from Tiger Beat magazine. Yeah boy, And that's a that's a vibe right there, man, that hair, those those side burns. Man, It's like, okay, that Like everything was tracking and I will tell you because I did a bit of a search. Cc win.

Come on, she was Amagram or whatever the girl's name was, the by damned she did nothing else. It appears she did nothing else. And I'm like, wait a second, this woman appears to be able to sing sort of do adopt that musical comedy style and was playing a role that in nineteen seventy three would absolutely be called feminist. She was doing the Princess as warrior bit twenty years before Disney started taking credit for it. She was amazing.

Yeah, she was fantastic. She was funny. Her singing, I think that was her singing. I don't know. I thought she was fantastic.

I think she may have been the best part of this movie. Ruh, yeah, I'd like that. I'd say eighty percent of this movie is basically leading up to one joke. Oh, I really appreciate that we have this whole thing of I'm in love with your daughter. No, no, don't don't be with my daughter.

No, no, I'm in love with this She's fantastic. Just all this pining and all this going, well, how why'n't you go with Dana Graham and Chill Hook Yep, no, no, no, I want the daughter. You have to have the daughter Cucola toy. Oh my god. It was amazing.

And then when she starts to speak, Yes, how did that Judy Holiday voice? I swear to God when that happened. When that happened, I just I was frozen. I thought that I was so I was high. I thought the fucking film was high because I was like, is this the whole this is it?

Like this is a joke, and he's just like, that's what we're doing. Yeah. Oh she has a voice where she sounds like Mickey Mouse on Helium with a with a lisp, b a slur or something, just like I don't know. Yes, for then we go that far for a gag, and then and then have the gag be that like literally we're watching his erection shrink with it. It's like and he's like backing away from her, like oh shit, Like first of all, I'm in love with her of the way she works and nothing, so that's enough.

And I'm like, why aren't you in love with cc win because she's amazing. And then and then it's like but then she talks and I don't like her voice, and now I hate Yea. There is no more service level bullshit romance that has ever existed in the history of anything. It is the It is the laziest gag, yet somehow it works amazingly. Oh it's so good.

It's so good. Yeah, And I mean this doesn't compare to the last Dinosaur, for me, I love that one more. But you know, it doesn't The Last Dinosaur doesn't have musical acts about spaghetti. You know what, can we please talk about that scene because sat so when when when he goes and it's gonna be a call that spaghetti, It's like, uh, oh no, that is that is absolutely here. It's a low hanging fruit, but it is sweet.

I thought you were gonna say that historically accurate. Oh yeah, also that Yeah, it's one of those things where it's like, you know, well, which culture was the first to have paper and which culture was the first to have this or that? And you know, and everyone thinks that spaghetti's Italian, but actually, you know, noodles originated in the Far East. I mean, as children, we heard this stuff. Yeah, pizza is not Italian or whatever.

All the things we think are a thing aren't that thing. You know. But but that's okay because then Jack Jack Weston's trumping around singing a song and it's for the kids? You know? Is that who this was for?

Is that who this the kids? Is that who this was for? This? I get this movie. Ye had to be children's attention for almost two hours though, Like that's my question because it's like, I don't know, like it feels for as much fun as it is, there are parts of it that if I were younger, I would probably check out, you know what I mean.

Yes, but you weren't a kid in nineteen seventy three. That's fair to tell you. The art of entertaining children was in its infancy. Richard. Yeah, this we had Scooby Doo and that was about it, and we were and we were lucky to have it, and we get a slap across the face and we said a word about it.

Oddly specific stories from Richard hadham Ayes. Yeah, I think the only person that I didn't like in this whole movie, and it wasn't the actor's fault. It wasn't Fred Sadov's fault, but it was Nicolo Polo, the very curmudgeonly Polo brother. And it's like, come on, dude, you know you gotta give you a little brother a break here. But yes, the family dynamics, this is very much the child's view of the world, you know, the benevolent grandfather type character of fucking Kubla Khan.

Kubla Khan's the most benevolent character in here. I'm waiting for him to like string people up and put their heads on pikes or any of these kinds of things. No, No, he's super nice, very very nice. That was gang Con That was That was Genghis Khan. Who did that?

Not Kubla Khan. Come on us. I think it was the good thing of James Knot. He's not even cold James kond That would be pretty good. Though.

Look, this movie ultimately, like like at first it looks like it might be a romance between him and Amagram, but then he's in love with This is a love story between Marco Polo and Kubla Khan. It is, oh for sure. I mean by the end of the movie, like he's like, you know, you were in love with my daughter. Now you're of legal age, and he's basically like the end of the movie, the big emotional thing is thank you, you were right. Her voice is so repellent no man could sustain an erection long enough to produce children with her.

And then the dad of that woman smiles knowingly and says it's nice to have wisdom, and then he scratches his nose with you with basically an instrument for you snipping cocaine coconail. Let's conail. Yeah, and then the two of them wink at each other, and now it's like, go off on your adventures. I think there's some trim waiting for you all around the world. I mean he found him in Madagascar.

Yeah, I want to talk about Madagascar. This movie so does. This movie takes ostensibly an hour to get going, and then they get where they're going. Yeah, because he's on that fucking kite for fifteen minutes. Yeah, Oh my god, Hey, hello down there.

Hello. If the goods getting old, pal, you want to come down or I'm having a great time. If you're a kid. If you're a kid and the movie starts like that, you're sitting there with your junior Mints in your popcorn and you're just scooting, You're like, I'm in bring it on. Problem is, Richard, this never came out in movie theater, so totally a movie of the week type of thing.

Yeah, but for sure that was the idea. This was, yeah, like a Disney movie. This was ultimately going for the Disney a matinee audience or drive ins. For sure. Is just sexy enough for a drive in.

That's what this is for. Now. That didn't happen is not my fault. Don't blame me for Desi ArtEZ Junior's career. You know, somebody pulled this thing faster than back girl.

I mean, we all know what happens when the family of the Arnez is either Lucile Ball or Desi Arnez tries to get serious. Because I watched something over the weekend called Stone Pillow featuring Lucille Ball as a bag lady, and it is fucking astounding. It was a nightmare. And Daphne Zuniga plays opposite Lucile Ball in the role you never thought even Lang is in the movie for whatever reason. Yeah, it's super weird.

You can imagine how bad it is. I'm miss like, I'm not sure that Lucy knows how to play anything other than comedy, and I'm not sure what Desi Ernez Junior can play at all other than like middling heart throb. I guys were alive then was this guy a thing for people like I kind of he was a thing. He was a thing for team girls right around this era, but like the same level of like David Cassidy and on all those other folks of their ilk, Like, I don't hear this guy mentioned the way those guys are always mentioned there. Well, yeah, well, isn't this guy like a Bonna dude?

Isn't this Bona Ducci level? Though, Like, isn't that who we're talking about at the tone wasn't classically like you know again, team beat Hot. He was just sort of, oh, the cute redhead kid, right. The ones that were the dreamboats were the David Cassidy's the I mean probably the guys from The Hardy Boys, both of them, Parker Stevenson, Shaun Cassidy, Shun Cassidy yep. And then Garrett it was Leaf Garrett, yes.

And then they're like very like real pale, sort of long hair blonde, yeah. The youngest of the GiB of the brothers, GiB Andy GiB Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Some of them were like legit like musicians and you know, and like Kiss, all the members of Kiss, which would be featured in these magazines with the makeup on Transport Yourself.

Back to nineteen seventy eight, Southern California, a young Richie had him seventh grade just just absolute train wreck of a human being. And in my English, in our English class, there was the you know, free reading nook with beanbag chairs, and it's like reading's fun, guys, and and they just they had all the Tiger Beat magazines. It's like, look, I don't give a shit what these kids are reading. Get the shit in there that they're going to read. And so they put all the teen mags out, sixteen and teen being all that stuff, add and just these rancid ripped up copies of these you know things.

But those were the guys in these things Ten Questions with Desi Arnez Junior. So he was part of these people. Then, Oh yeah, okay, because like that name carries weight. But like you never hear anything about him now. But he was on The Lucy Show, but he never really became a thing on it.

Like I don't think there was ever a show just starring him on his own. Wasn't Lucy's daughter also on the Lucy Show? Wasn't it her son and daughter and her Lucy Arnz? Right? Yeah, yeah, I think that was.

I think that was post I Love Lucy though. Wasn't that? Oh yeah, because they're like adults, right, they're like teenagers, they're teenagers and she's like much older. I mean that movie Stone Pillow I was talking about came on eighty five, so it's like thirteen years after this, so but I remember, yeah, I mean one of the most famous episodes of I Love Lucy was one little Rickie was born. Yeah, that was an amazing episode.

And when they're all dressed up like what was that head Hunters and stuff, and they were all at the window looking at the baby, and that was amazing. I mean, I saw a lot of I Love Loosely growing up because that's my mom's favorite TV show. So it's just like, and I don't know, I know very little about their family post the show. So it was like, this is the first thing I've ever seen desi Arnez Junior in. And again I'm not sure if he's not good or I mean, the script just doesn't suit him well.

But he's just kind of just kind of looks lost most of the time. Well he's doing you know, I don't think performing bizarrely was in his blood, even though it was, but he did. I think he did what he needed to do. I thought he was charming enough. I mean again, you sort of look at him as the male ingenue.

The star of the movie is Zero Mustell, right, yea, Oh my God, Yeah, you go to see him. He'd done all of his big movies, he'd done Producers, funny thing happened on the way to the Forum and the Front and all the other things. So so you're going to see him. He's got the big character role. And then this is basically again the young romantic lead.

He didn't have to be super funny, he didn't have to be super really anything other than good looking and in love with who he had to be in love with. So, I mean, all of the entire cast were sort of welcome presences. You know. There was never a scene really where it cut to an actor or a storyline where I was like, Oh I don't like them, you know, or oh, we gotta sit through this. It was like, oh, no, I I like her, I like him, I like him, he's funny, blah blah blah.

So it was it was nice again to sort of feel like, oh, all right, I can spend an hour in fifty minutes with these people, and then you get anti magic yeah, which I was hoping there's going to be more of that. Yeah, me too. It was oddly kind of compartmentalized right at the beginning of the movie. I guess in the first thirty minutes. I mean, that's why it takes there's a reason it takes an hour to get going with this movie, because there's twenty minutes of anti magic, which is rather well done.

Oh yeah, well by this time they had, you know, they were so far into it. Yeah, they're old hands at this point. As as as Papa had him flips through the ranking and Basque book that he purchased for the two of us. One cares about you saying that this wasn't theatrically released because there are I mean, obviously it has a movie poster to it. You don't really necessarily make those for your TV releases.

And then there's a thing on eBay of an ad for it. Tomorrow Entertainment and Cinerama Releasing proudly announced their joyous new musical for their Christmas holidays, and then at the bottom it says contact your cinema Cinerama Releasing branch. So it seems like this was released theatrically. Let's see. Let's see what it says in our Bible, the enchanted world of Ranking and Bath.

It says here Marco was a very elaborate musical, which I believe is true, it was freaking they spent money on this. Yeah. The sets were amazing, the sets, the costume. They flew desiernz Junior over to Japan because there's a getty image of them in Tokyo outside of the Toho Studio shooting, so they even flew him overseas. He and Liza his girlfriend at the time, Lizaman Nelly Folks Wisa would fly out there for like booty calls with desirenz Junior.

I mean, I assume it was he. Maybe it was Zero. Yeah, I do remember Benny when he was talking to us for his interview, he was talking about Zero Mustell and that Mustell was this huge painter and what was it He would traded one of his paintings for one of Benny Corson's paintings of Memory Serves. I thought that was kind of nice interesting. Yeah, I mean, look, Zero Mustel.

If not for him, this movie I think would have a lot of problems, right, I don't think I don't think we'd be as excited about talking this movie about this movie as we are. But he's so good. Yeah, even if though it's just like kind of character that we've seen a bunch of times, like it's very boilerplate. It's still great. But again that's kind of what you want from this, Like you don't need a new artistic creation, you need a skilled vaudevillian who can put across.

And wasn't it funny Like that first song that he did, it almost felt like he was the Burgermeister or Yes, New Concord, he was one of those like it's like, oh shit, he's like a live version of all those burly guys Zay and I'm I'm singing my song and I'm going like this and it's just like, oh my god, dude, Richard, that was an amazing voice he just did. By the way, that was you could have been part of ranking and bass just now. But you're right, I mean that, And it's reinforced with that antimagic section where you get to see him as an AnimagiC puppet. And then it totally works there too, totally works. And what's funny is the desire Nez works also.

He's got that sort of smooth, sort of bizarrely you know, shell shocked sort of puppet look Ye. Both as a puppet, he looked more real actually as the puppet. I think I was just say like this. Maybe this would have worked better just as a puppet thing. I mean, it could have gotten into a lot of other things, especially that whole thing with the giant bird from Madagascar and stuff.

I was like waiting for that bird to show up as an AnimagiC thing. Yeah. I almost feel like by showing us the AnimagiC part in the movie, it's like, why why not just do that then? Because like it worked so well and I wanted more of it, because yeah, when it's Desi Arnez doing the voice for the puppet, he's kind of charming because he doesn't have to do much like and I don't have to see him just kind of looking harried all the time. And then and Zero Mustill did some voices for more than one animated ranking and bass production, so he was part of the family.

He clearly enjoyed doing it. He clearly I don't know what they were paying him, but he looked like he was having the time of his life. And it was only a few years before he died. But in fact, everyone looked like they were enjoying themselves. But I think I think they were going for like a you know, Oliver vibe, like we're a rollicking musical where there's some kids in it and there's some little bit of action, a little bit of fighting, and a little bit of fantasy and some fun songs.

Like there weren't a ton of like romantic ballads that got really slow and sappy and so well because the one romantic character is a is a gag because they can't open their mouth, right, Yeah, which I get. Yeah, I mean I guess. I guess the songs that we do get, other than the spaghetti one, are interesting ultimately forgettable, I think, other than the oh Damn or by Damn, Oh Damn d which has like the language people please. Yeah, that was one of the surprises for I really thought that the whole thing was going to be he goes on this trip to as they say it, Madagascar. Yes you know it's not Madagascar, it's Madagascar, and and I thought, Oh, the whole idea now is he's gonna go and actually fall in love with cc Win, Right, That's what I was waiting for.

Yeah, it's like, oh, this is the actual woman, Like we are the ones who have the relationship because we have the souls of the wanderer and whatever. And by the time he gets back, the joke will be well. Point of the trip wasn't the bird. The point of the trip was for the two of you to fall in love and now you've forgotten about Kuklatoy. But then that didn't happen.

But then a different thing happened, which I couldn't believe, and I was delighted by as a fifty five year old man, like, that's all prefaced by fifty five year old man Mafio Polo falls in love with well Tan and our our gram How the fuck do you actually Tan gram? Cc win? Yeah? Yeah, actress who actress who I wish had a career past this movie. Yeah, I would.

I would go see more movies based on her. Um. So when the song started, I'm like, oh no, this is going to be another you know, humiliate this old dude song where he's like I'm in love with you and she's like, yeah, get a life, you tool fucking hate you old haggard man who's older than me. What oddly personal Richard problem? Why are they why are they making fun of me?

And right? And then he makes like a really good argument. He's like, look, I'll do the cooking cleaning. I'm already doing it, right, and spaghetti and I share something and I will never change you because I don't have shitty, misogynistic, you know, toxic masculine views. And then she goes, you know what, you're fucking right deal game on, game on, Jack Jack weston, game on, And he got it in the end.

Oh yeah, and what did he get? Got her got her man in a big way. Yeah, no, but in a good way, in a way where it's like it's like they were actually like like at first I was, I was surprised but pleased that she was. It's like, oh, this woman's a warrior. You know they're doing that.

And then I'm like, oh, extra credit because it's nineteen seventy three and not nineteen ninety three. And then extra credit that they actually have like own. She strikes up a friendship with Marco. It's like we do. It's like, I don't hate you, and the story didn't make you into a dick who wanted who I had to reject to then get Mafia Polo.

You and I are friends, Marco, but I'm actually in love with this other guy. And and I'm like, shit, this is almost like evolved. It was a little progressive. I was surprised at how progressive. It was.

Yeah, yeah, that was that was really unexpected because I'm not saying that, you know, like the things we haven't watched haven't been progressive, but they haven't really tackled it in any of the live action films that we watched so far, namely The Sinens of Dorian Gray, The Bushido Blade, The Bermuda Depths, The Last Dinosaur King Kong Escapes that did I forget any God, The Ivory Ape. Yeah, well, this is pretty progressive, even for the one that had Anthony Perkins in it, where it's like taking place ostensibly in the eighties. Yeah. Yeah, And it's also oddly progressive within a movie that is also oddly misogynist when it comes to Kuklatoy and that whole relationship of she is beautiful and she doesn't even need to speak.

I just need to look at her and that's all I need to know that I want to climb on that. And then and then it's like, oh him, henny, woman opens her mouth I'm not interested in? Is the implication also that her husband left her because of her voice? Well, and not only that, but that she's also annoying, like, oh, are we gonna live here? What's going to happen.

I don't think your brothers are kidding you in enough. You need to read the ghost. That's the first thing she says. It's like, what they're laying it on thick. They're laying it on fucking real thick with this character.

Yeah, she's just you know, annoying nag personified. He's like, Oh, I'd rather die at sea. I'd rather go eat that fucking spaghetti with whatever the fuck Mafio Polo was throwing on it. I'll go get eaten by a rook. I also like that that in Madagascar, they're just like, you know what we're doing.

Instead of just attacking them and throwing spears at him, we're doing this whole elaborate process of making giant feathers because leaving that, by leaving giant feathers on the beach, that won't attract people, that will send them screaming. It's like, do you know the white man will he will find a way to ruin anything for you, especially if it's an animal of some kind. Big. They like big things, and if they're white, they like it even more. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, So it's so fucking weird. And that wraps up that rap up in literally five minute. Yeah, but they've got an actor that old, that old, delightful, toothless actor who never actually says anything. It's just the narration of Desi writing in his journal. He then explained to us how they use Bode Narrow Yes, and the guys running on going oh my god, yes, but he just keeps laughing like this crazy person.

I was like, this is like an Abrams z Zuccher Abrams movie or in the background they're using tupperware. Yeare you are right? This was part of the ABC Saturday Superstar movie, So I wonder if this was set to air theatrically and then got pushed to one of these and Ranking Bass, by the way, they were kind of the kings of this ABC Saturday Superstar movie. This is where Mad Mad Mad Monsters aired. Willie Mays and the Say Hey Kid another Ranking Bass.

This was like Ranking ba Ass going toe to toe with Filmation and those bastards at Hannah Barbara screen Gems, the original the original proprietors. Oh right, I'll get you guys, children cartoons, We're gonna show the Red baron this week. There should be a TV movie about about the brutal, bloody, cutthroat backstage wars of the animators of the nineteen sixties and seventies. What do you mean there should be a TV show, Richard? There's there.

It is bro right that show. Holy shit, dude, that would that show. That show would fucking kill man. It's like Madmen. But everybody's just like, oh, what's the angle on that show?

They're like talking to their characters or something. There's some fucking angle. There's guy, there's always an angle, folks. Yeah, mad Men already exists. You can't do that again.

Yeah, something along the lines of, you know, the magical people who brought you your favorite childhood characters who are actually cutthroat bastards. Jules Bass and Arthur Rankin are just like tweaked out of their minds and gotta create fucking Frosty. Yeah, yeah, a long fucking metal males to wit for Arthur marty Croft. Oh my god, those guys, Oh Jesus about those guys are I mean, they don't get around man. They were tweakers.

Man. Oh, they were serious about that ship. They were like, oh yeah, no, Sigmund and the Sea Monster. That is solid gold entertainment. Don't don't you ever mock that dude.

Then you get the behind the scenes of like Lidsville and they're just like, come on, God, why am I blanking on the guy that was Who do Charles Nelson Riley? They're like, you gotta get Charles on the set and he's like, oh, he's so wasted. He had a full day of shooting match game yesterday. And you know how those guys, they they drink like fishes. Yeah, he'd go ghosted missus Mewer went late last.

Yeah. Anyway, I think they went into this with the best of intentions, and I think they I think they they achieved most of their goals, uh in ways, And look, we've enjoyed when we enjoyed the Bushito Blade, we can't say we didn't ye enoid Dorian Gray in its way, I think this is the best of all the live action things we've watched. I think so, I agree, and it still hanging out for Last Dinosaur. But would you agree, though, Mike, that this has a better performance by the ostensible like old hand actor, like the legend. Possibly.

I mean, I would watch Last Dinosaur again in a heartbeat. Richard in that movie, I couldn't stop laughing with that movie. That's fair. There were some pretty funny parts in that movie. When you're playing a character named Maston Thrust.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, zero fucking subtlety. The back of subtlety is astounding. I thought you were about to say zero fucking mustele also also that so be it. You know, when you have sex with so many women, you have hundreds of children, what does it matter who the mother is fire, You gotta kiss all of them every day, that's right. I know all their names, I know all their birthdays.

But that song is bad? Can I say that that song there? I think that there are no there, no richards wrong, there are There's only one good song in the movie, and it's the oh Damn song or bye damn, oh damn. I would listen to that song outside question question always becomes with musicals. Would you listen to the song outside the context of the movie.

No, you're right, I would not listen to right, I signed thousand listen to that Spaghetti's song Spaghettes, especially on Tuesdays. Yeah no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no. But I mean, come on, I mean, as a concept, as she's ripping off the clothes as a sign of pro I mean that is a seventy three. Oh yeah, by damn, I'm not going to wear his corsets. I'm not gonna wear his this and she's pulling off the clothes.

That's pretty sexy. Yeah, I know. I mean, I think my problem with this movie is I just wanted more of cc went, more than anything else other than Zero Mostel. So Mustel Mustel, Sorry you noted is Zero Mostel. Historian Richard had him here when when Marco goes back to Italy and he gets so surly, I was just like, come on, he's serious.

Now, he's very serious. Kites whether they be red or blue or anything. You know, he's serious because he has facial hair oh damn straight. But the great thing is like in that moment where he's like I'm I'm sick of these feasts and these things, and he's throwing stuff around, and Zero Mostel sort of like just hold bring things up for him to throw. It's like it really like you can really make the argument that this again really is just Zero Mostel's character Kubla Khan parenting another time you were might've got six hundred kids, make that six hundred and one, right, Yarnez.

I am going to help you through this stage of your life. You think you want this girl, you think you want this life, and I AM going to slowly create situations that demonstrate to you what it is you really want, and and I will do it in this slightly benevolent manner, and by the end you will be on the correct path through this sort of emotional jiu jitsu. If you will that that Zero Mustell performs again, it ends with the two of them like lifelong friends. Well, and then everybody else gets rich from all the whale amber grie that they find on the beach. That was a surprise.

Yeah, where did this come from? I smell it an air amber grie. What the people in seventy three know what the hell ambergree is like? Well, whaling was still a very viable option back in seventy three. Yeah, before green Piece.

Yes, what part of the whale was this? Ambergree is like the it's is it like the shit? It's it's from the intestines, So yeah, exactly, it's like whale shit. But it's like they use it to make perfume, right, Yeah, Yeah, it's a waxy type of substance we use for perfume, I want to say, for like lipstick and that kind of stuff as well. Back in the back in the day.

Yeah, yeah, they did use every part of the whale, and apparently this was the part that was that made fire and perfume and was more valuable than diamonds. Yeah, it was. It was. It's pronounced yeah, it's it's rubbing alcohol in its scent, you know. I mean, this movie makes a good argument for whaling, you know.

Well, and it's not even something that you you hack out of a whale. It's just this weird like intestinal slurry that they kind of eject sometimes, so right, but if you find a dead whale, it's in its digestive track, which is why it was such a big deal, right Yeah, I mean, so in twenty twenty one, they found a two hundred and eighty pound piece that was valued at one point five million dollars in twenty twenty one. So there you go, Richard, I mean, there you go. It's still worth a lot today, but it's not legal in the United States, so there is that, right. In twenty twelve, they found a one pound piece that was worth sixty three thousand dollars.

So yeah, it's something. Why are we podcasting? Let's go kill some whales, not whaling? Can we just go find dead whales and pull out their poop a shirt? I think he's on a T shirt, Richard.

Can't we just go find dead whales and pull out their poop? I don't know if it's every type of whale. If it's just the sperm whale, that could be wrong. I think it's just sperm whales. Hey, speaking of sperm.

Wow, well I hope to god you landed. What was that? What was the beverage that Zero Mostell was serving him at the beginning? Fermented mare's milk, which is totally a real thing. It was mayre's milk because it's like, yeah, here's a milky substance that comes from a horse.

And I'm right, are they making like a horse jizz joke? No, it's not a Tom Green movie. Come on, it is so it is pronounced but do you know, oh god, it's not. But do you know what it's pronounced? Kumis k u m?

I s exactly. That also confused me, but it is no, No, it is a real thing, because I remember on an episode of Bizarre Food with Andrew Zimmern when he's in Mongolia, he tries it and looks not for the faint of heart. I would try it if I knew that I could try it safely, because I am that person. But it does not sound pleasant by any starch of the imagination. It tastes good.

No, I would try it. I've never tried it. I believe my folks tried it when they were there. They were in Kazakhstan and they had something similar, and I think they told the tourists not to try it. Oh well, I think one.

I think a tour I think someone on their tour did try it, and I believe they probably got sick if I'm correct. I mean that's not surprising, right, No pasteurization of the kumiss No, well, no, it's it's it's supposed to be like unpasteurized because it ferments, right. Pasteurization is like a Western thing. Man. You know why orange orange juice tastes so bland in this country because we pasteurize it.

That's why orange juice it do you buy like at the grocery store. It tastes so good because hasn't past your eyes. The moment you pasteurized stuff, you cook the flavor out of it. Well, okay, in the show that you watched, did they try it and did they like it? Do you remember?

I mean I think he was like, this is an acquired taste. Yeah. I mean Zimmern was interesting because he he was kind of whoo see when it came to a lot of the bizarre foods he was doing. I remember he hated Duryan, and it's like, you know, haven't you watched Like I mean, Bourdaine was just like, oh give me that dry. It was all about durry.

Have you had duryan before? I love dry? And do you actually like dury in? Durryan ice cream, dury and all kinds of stuff durty and cookies? Yeah?

It really like you specifically, you actually like it? Mike, Like, I haven't pulled it out of the fruit and ate it, but I've had things flavored dirry and and I'm just like, yeah, bringing on, So I've held like durry and smoothies and all kinds of stuff. Wow, yeah, wow, I've had dry and smoothies before and I really didn't like him, So huh that's surprising. I'm hey, man, it isn't Durian is an acquired taste, definitely. Yeah, where you guys are doing that, even like where that's even offered a lot, Like like I'm I'm in La and I don't feel like I'm running into dury and it's not really getting set down in front of me.

Go to any place that has bobatie and they probably have it on the men you like, any place that's not like a westernized boba te place probably has it on the menu next to like the grass jelly drink or for the taro root right myself, you may drink, which I would sounds fucking great right now, my god, Yeah, yeah, I could definitely go for some bubble tea right now. But Kumis, on the other hand, they sell it. They sell it in bottle form over there. Richard, Oh all right, all right, I just wanted to be I just I just wanted to know. I just wanted to make sure I wasn't like there wasn't like a really gross joke.

I mean it feels kind of like in the movie that's the case, right, But no, they're not going for horsecome. They're just here's this weird thing that you're gonna eat this. Ain't this ain't jackass baby. I mean they're probably like, you know, I mean, I'm surprised they didn't have other things, just like, oh, here's snake or scorpion or something else. Wild snake is surprised.

Yes, monkey Brin's child. I was just gonna say, you watch freaking Tete of Doom and it's like, oh, you know, let's you know, make fun of like, ooh, this disgusting food that these foreign primitives eat. They eating monkey brains. These people are savages in defense of that movie is based off of cereals from the twenties where they would have done that too. So Kalima, that's my favorite in Nana Jones, don't care.

I will defend that movie. Don't care, hey, Richard, but I will leave you Richard. As we veer away from the topic of Mare's milk, do you know what Japanese drink is based off of the fermented mare's milk? Well, no, calpis cow. Really, calpus is based is inspired by the flavor of kumis.

Yes, no, no, no no no, you're saying you're saying in Japan now you're saying they drink cow urine called no, no, no, no, it's called calpis. Oh okay, oh well come on, it's c A l p I s calpus. I don't know how else to pronounce it. Well, it sounded like you had a Baltimore accent, you know. But it's called coupus, and it's like a it's like yakult but carbonated.

It's like a big bottle. It's like a yogurt water drink drink. Yeah, okay, that's fine, that's fine. So that's probably what kumas tastes like. And you can find kupus at most Asian grocery stores.

I was sort of thinking that that it was sort of yogurty. Yeah, I mean it looks like it. It looks like it, and they're drinking it, you know what. They're drinking it out of bowls too, or they they're drinking ont of bowls or they drinking out of cups? Are they drinking it out of cups?

Small? Small bowl? I thought, okay, yeah, because like that's also like a there's a Korean fermented rice drink that's served in like a bowl if you order it. They don't serve it in a cup. Here's my thing.

Here's my thing. I will try anything twice, you know, and I'll try it the second time because like, if I didn't like it the first time, I might just assume, well, maybe it wasn't good at that place, I was in the wrong mood. I will try things. The number of things that I adopt into regular use because I just freaking love it so much are a lot's a much smaller, you know. It's like, Okay, that's fine, you're serving that.

I'll have some, but I don't need it in my diet. There's a lot of those kind of beverages that are savory, like savory cold beverages are not really my thing. That's not a Western thing though. I when I was in India, they have a lot of like salty drinks, like drinks that are like very salt forward and like savory and vegetile and like that. For me, as like a Westerner, that's not a thing that I've been exposed to.

Right. But they're cold, right, I mean, they're like yeah. But that's the weirdest part is that they're on top of everything else. Like I don't remember what it was, but I remember distinctly waking up the first morning I was in New Delhi going downstairs to my kitchen and my friends. I was sitting down and they put this glass of juice in front of me, and I was like, all right, I'm super thirsty.

It's pretty warm. This just looks good and cold. I put it to my lips and it was like black carrot juice or something, and it was salty as fuck. And I just remember sitting there thinking to myself, like I remember looking at my friends and I was like, what is this And they were like, well, it's like black carrot juice. It's good for when it's hot out.

And I was like all right, and I drank it like and they're right, it was good for when it was hot out. But I think we as Westerners are not I mean, like people look weirdly if you drink V eight straight up. You know people aren't doing that, but like that's a thing elsewhere. We as Westerners are just like I love soda, Like you want your tea unsweetened serve. Why is there something wrong with you?

Like, yeah, yeah, I want I want the sweet cold drink. You know, a bloody mary or something like that is like that has to have alcohol in it, like nobody. Yeah, alcohol, so that that's what makes it worth it. Yeah, but that's and yeah. So you know, like as we were sitting here podcasting, I drank us effectively the same thing as one of those komis, which is like a probiotic yogurt thing.

So we have our own thing similar to it. But yeah, not a cumb joke. What do you guys? Land On kombucha never tried it. The first time I tried it, I thought it was spoiled.

And then the second time I tried it, I was like, no, this is the way it's supposed to be, because when you when I opened it for the first time, it smells super vinegary, obviously, and I was like, it's spoiled, right. I threw it away, And then the next time I bought, I was like, I'll try it again. Smelled the same way. I was like, Oh, this is this is the way it's I love it. I love comb Oh really, yeah, it's amazing I made.

I was one of those weirdos that was like making it during the pandemic. I was making sour dough and kombucha. I was that girl's gift. That's what I always think of with kembucha, the one where it's her the reaction where she's just like trying it and like, m this is a good No. No, it's super vinegary.

It's super sour. But there are some really good brands out there. I like it. I like I like sour, I like cold, and I love vinegar. I mean I could.

I'm one of those guys that could like drink salad dressing like out of the bottom of the bowl. You know, It's like one of my salad's done. I'm like, oh, I want more of the Italian dressing. But the kombucha and I really like and I tried it a lot, and I even was like, well, maybe this will sort of become my you know, like my afternoon treat or an evening drink instead of drink drink. But I just I couldn't get into it that hard, you know.

I'm like, no, ultimately, I don't need this flavor on a daily basis. I get it. It's not. It's not for everybody, but it is for a lot of people. It is a good alcohol replacement because it is kind of it's fermented and carbonated, and then they do have hard kombucha, so they just add the alcohol back.

They just allow the kombucha to ferment more. I think, so yeah yeah, but noah, no fermented Mare's milk in this country. Yeah no, no, And that's fine. Although I do like Lassie, I like the mango oh yeah, wow yeah yeah. Well yeah, so essentially it's like a fermented version of that.

Richard just you know, use my question to the two of you, and and movies like this bring it up, and I'm going to guess your answer is going to be pretty quick. Are you the kind of person who if you lived in the era of Marco, would you be the person staying at home and just kind of living your life in whatever place you were born, or would you be the person who was, like, no, I'm going to get on a boat and I may or may not see any of you ever again. Second one, man, so fucking hard. Let me die at see, Like, if I'm in that, you're in that time and place, like you don't know any you don't know any of this is ever going to exist? Fuck it?

Yeah, yeah, I mean I love to travel now, I don't see me not wanting to travel otherwise. And yeah, if I could go down the Silk Road, that'd be fucking fantastic. Yeah, what about you, Richard so so, Mike, you're a you're a travel guy, like if you had, if you won the lottery, you'd be traveling. Oh god, yes, yeah, same. I mean I used to travel a lot before the pandemic.

It's just it's been harder to jump start myself in the last two years to get back to that point. Also, you know, it's gotten exponentially more expensive, right right. I used to have my sort of world view of my life and sort of my existence was very word oriented. It was like it was like, you know, the world is like this amazing place that I made, you know, go and experience food and drink and like consume in a in a way, you know, it's like I guess, like that's what you want to do when you travel, Consume experiences, consume new you know, vistas and stuff. And that was very much tied to and I and I want to I want to make my mark on the world creatively.

But weirdly, when I got divorced, my career was sort of on the ascendency and movie came out and the TV show came out, and suddenly I was working a lot. And then I didn't really have the opportunity because I had small kids and I was in a divorce, so I couldn't really travel with the I couldn't like take my kids to Europe, like legally my ex wife would have to sign off on that. And it was just like, that's probably why approach that. And now twenty years have gone by, and now I really am upset that the travel bug in me has sort of died. And I'm kind of like, yeah, I don't know Europe whatever, that don't really need you know, Asia, you know, Oh, I don't know.

Japan sounds interesting, but I don't know. It upsets me because I want to be Marco Polo. I want to be the guy who wants to explore, and yet now I don't know if it's an age thing or what it is. But I'm sort of like and good, Yeah, i think I'll be traveling till the day I die, hopefully. I mean, that's a dream for me, is once I retire, being able to take two three more trips a year.

I mean, when I was a kid, it was just like I would watch things like BJ and the Bear and I be like, man, if I was a truck driver, I could go all over the United States. This would be great. I could see you as a truck driver, Mike. Great. Hey, But you know, I always had a fantasy, and I've driven across the country more than once, and my fantasy was always, Oh, what's going to happen is you know, in the big cities, everything is Quiznos and McDonald's.

But you're gonna when you're really out in the nowhere parts of the country, You're gonna you're gonna stumble upon these mom and pop places that are just the food is just home cooked and so delicious. And I have never ever found that any of you. It's just been traveling in California solely, Richard. Maybe maybe my problem is the interstate, Like I haven't gotten far en off off the interstate. But I mean, are you guys finding a lot of this like, oh my god, we found this little plays won by this wonderful couple, and I've never had peach pie this good.

Yeah. I mean I do a lot of research before I go places, so there is even thank goodness for some of these food TV places. I mean, say, wish you will about you know, nurs drivings and dives and stuff and guy Fieri. I don't know why we pick on Guy Fieri so much, but don't look at me I am picking on Guy Fieri's. Won't point that out.

I like them on ironically. Yeah. I will go to there's a website called, I think like TV food maps or something, and they will highlight like where are you or where do you want to go? And here's all the shows that talked about these rest runs that are local to this and it's great. You can find so many great things.

When I was in Philadelphia, I was like, oh, hey, there's a great sub shop when you're here, and some of the Phila natives were like, really there is. I'm like yeah, so as we right down this street. So we went down, we all got subs and it's just like, this is fucking amazing. I didn't know this place was here and I'm like, oh, it was on Food Network. Yeah.

When I travel, I'm one of those people that's like I want to know, not like I have to itinerize everything because I hate that kind of traveling, right, But like, if I go somewhere, I'm not going to be like I want to eat at McDonald's like a phone boy. I will eat a McDonald I will eat a McDonald's in a foreign country once, just it's somewhere where they're offering things that are different, right, Like when I went to India. Yeah, I went to KFC in in Shanghai just because it was like, what do they have a KFC over here? Well, Japan, I mean the KF state, Oh my god, oh yeah, they have KFC for Christmas pain, Yes, exactly, Yeah, that's that no for I think I understand though, Richard, like your kind of position, because I feel it in a way too, Like I, like I said, it's hard for me to feel like I want to rejump start that travel bug, right.

Yeah. Well, then the other thing is I'm obviously thinking a lot about this and COVID kind of you know, sort of pressed pause on a lot of things. In the world's a different place now, and you know, if you went places in Europe twenty years ago, they may not be the same or feel the same now, you know, probably all over the world. But the other thing is a thing that I think about and I'm just curious about you guys, because like, there are certain cities that I go to that I immediately just I'm like, oh, yeah, this is my place, and then others that I go to expecting for it to be my place, and it's not my place. Like everyone talks about Seattle.

It's like Seattle is amazing, and I've been to Seattle a few times and it's nice, but it's not my place. But Portland is. I go to Portland, I feel I come home. And then New York has always been like, oh, like, people think I'm from New York and I actually grew up in Los Angeles, but I go to New York and I'm like New York. My fantasy has always been to live in New York.

And I go to New York and I like it, but I don't love it. But but here's the weird thing. When I go to DC, I'm like, something about this place resonates with me. I love Washington, I don't know why. And Boston.

I have spent a vanishingly small amount of time in Boston, a couple of days here, a couple of days there. But I hit the ground. I go to the hotel, and the ride to the hotel, I'm like, this is the greatest city in the world. I don't know why, and I don't know what that is. But do you guys ever have that feeling?

I feel like I used to. I feel like I used to when I travel used to. I mean again, I haven't been anywhere in so long. It's not like, oh because I like that restaurant right now. Now, it's just like the feel of it.

Yeah, I'm here. Something feels right. Yeah, that's it. It's a feeling, that's it. And you and well you kind of get that sense in this movie, right because there's this huge they don't really talk about it, which I kind of felt like it was a little bit of a disappointment, like the idea that Marco Polo wants to stay in Mongolia, yeah forever, Like how do you do?

How do you do that? Like really? But I think you did, because when it takes years to get somewhere, like if you're gonna go halfway around the world, at a certain point, you're like, well or you know, you know, as long as they don't talk, the women here are fantastic, you know, you'd like to go. Yeah, this is it. It's not that easy to go home, So maybe I just stay.

I'll die that fucking boat. You get on a boat, You're gonna die on a boat. Yeah, Yeah, it's amazing that you can even make it off alive. I mean, they could get scurvy, you could, Yeah, so many things. When you read about people traveling by boat three hundred years ago, it's like, we're taking two hundred guys and we're gonna hope that fifteen of us make it right.

Yeah, for real, what the fuck? That's not Those aren't good odds. And just imagine that they went to Madagascar for nothing. Yeah that's true for a giant bird feather. That wasn't real, right, But but at least Jack Weston got to be with cc win Richard.

What we should do, Richard, you want to fix your travel bug, Let's find somewhere a neutral location. Let's all travel there together. Las Vegas. Yeah, that's not even travel. That to me, that's yeah, fuck you dude.

You don't even have to do anything. You drive there on a weekend. Las Vegas, hold on, like Los Angeles. I got LA. We'll I'll meet in La.

You know what, though, Mike, I really vibed with an arbor, which is my one Michigan excursion. I haven't really I drove through Nebraska, but I never stopped long enough to figure out Okay, you know, Texas really isn't my vibe. I've never I mean, Austin has been nice a couple of times, but I've never felt like, oh, I got to get back to Texas, Whereas New Mexic like Santa Fe. That is. I go to Santa Fe and I'm like, I'm kind of this is a mean place.

I like it and I don't know why. I'cause there and I'm like, yeah, this is it. Yeah, it's funny. Of all the places in New Mexico that I stopped, that was the least that didn't hit me at all. I was just like, ah, this is so artsy and stuff.

But you know, going to like Roswell or you know, Roswell was amazing. Oh my god, the Mexican food that I got there was so good. What is it about Roswell? Man? Like, I don't know, have you ever been to Roswell, Richard?

I have not. That's a place, man. Yeah, I like. I like the idea of neutral territory, like we got to meet up something. Yeah, I ain't nowhere and everybody's been to you before.

It's got to be like South Dakota or something. Sue falls. Then you're making it easy for me because that's only like three hours from me. See Sally House again, only about three hours for me. I got it.

Let's meet up in Outer Mongolia. Oh, there you go. Let's go to where Kubla consburied, where we should broadcasts from the North Pole. Yeah, oh that would be it. D We're getting back into We're getting back into holiday season with this show.

We guys, we got we gotta start talking about wrapping this up. Why I don't understand. I don't understand, Richard. There's a podcast network and everything. Now, Sir, sir, we're coming back in Christmas.

We'll see if we can pass go one more time. I'm not done. Do we just do? We end with a with a repeat viewing of Rudolph, Like, how do we I've got for next month? For next month, I've got the what was it the Wild World of Mother Goose?

I mean that's yeah, I haven't done before the Wacky World, Sorry, Wacky World, Richard, Richard, did you think there was nothing left? You own a book, sir? You have bought the book for us that has pages on pages of projects we haven't even scratched the surface of yet, Sir. I didn't know we were gonna be obsessive, but you provided us the book through which we could be obsessive. When I send you the book, it was sort of like, here's us closing the book on ranking and almost two years ago down Oh boy boy, that was Christmas stuff.

You know we did. Look, we scraped off the top of the iceberg first. Now we're underwater. Man. But hey, I'm just saying we're coming back around.

I'm just thinking, you know, what's our gear five baby landing? He's thinking of the exit plan he's been thinking of is day one shifting up gears gear five. We're going for the third year of ranking and bass baby chard. The day we do Smokey the Bear is the day I know we're closing it on the ending Bear too far. I feel like Timothy Treadwell getting eaten up.

Hey, Richard, I'd like to point out to you once again, this show is us sensible, your fault. You've got to stop saying that. Maybe not saying it, just maybe just reminding you is a better way of putting in Marco. You've got to stop blaming. By the way, how many times did you guys need to shout out Polo when they're calling from Marco in this show.

Game right for me, it was we played in the pool. It's like blind man's bluff, so you're like in the pool with your eyes closed and just like Marco and then the other kids like, yeah, yeah, I know for sure to drive my parents crazy playing that game. Watching this movie though. The drinking game is when they say Marco, you say Polo and take a shot dead in the first ten minutes, ye bive alcohol poison before by damn, you have to scrape you off the fucking floor. Man, you've been eating too much cowpiss and Kumas.

Cowpiss and Kumas. Oh that's my favorite comedy team from Kazakhstan. How Piss and Koma. I like the brothers Kara Matzov, but just not as funny. Yeah, God Lord or God Richard Richard.

I think every time we do these shows, you're always looking for an exit strategy. Man, But you know you know that the day that the show ends, you and I both know that you are the three of us. Know that you will know when the end is coming because it will be signaled as the end, because we will have nothing else to talk about, and I will be sad. I will be, You will be, You will be, Chris. Before you got on, I was just I got on with Mike and I was just so happy.

We're home. See everybody, it's a fucking act He's a Hollywood type. He's around actors all the time. He knows how to pull up the heartstrings of you. Dear listener.

I keep saying I want to quit, but you know, you guys keep dragging me back in. Is it? Wacky Mother Goose? Now Special Thanks to the Great Octopus for our theme song and Abby Stabby for incredible show artwork. We will be back next month.

Next month, Richard to continue our look at Ranking and Bass feature film work, as we discuss the nineteen sixty six animated film The Wacky World of Mother Goose, once again written by Romeo Muller, So it's probably gonna be very progressive. Mother Goose don't need no man. That's right, voice oddly by Patty Lapone. Yeah. Until then, Chris, what is happening with you, sir?

Nothing as exciting as Ranking and Bass? Is there anything? Is there anything? Right? True?

Truly? There a little Colombo podcast. Yeah, there's a Colombo podcast that we do. There's a Barney Miller podcast that we do. There's a movie podcast that I do.

You can find most of the links to those things over at cstashi dot com. Yeah. As for me, that's it. What about you, mister Adam? Where can people find you?

And you're not around here? Well, when I'm not being barred from the garage where Susan is doing eighties TV ladies interviewing everyone from Tyne Daily to Sharon Gless to Stephanie Zimbolist to Karen Arthur, the first woman to ever win an Emmy for directing and it happened to be an episode of Cagney and Lazy. When I'm not participating in that, I'm working on season four of Titans, which we are wrapping up. We're in the last couple days of it, and it's gonna premiere, I believe in November, and we've got it's going to be two parts, Part one, and then we're gonna they'll be like, you know, we'll take a few couple of weeks off and then part two, and we've got amazing guest stars and it's going to be a big season.

I hear you landed a big whale with this one big whale. There's a lot of Ambergris. Is that what it's called. Yes, that's what it's called. And I believe, I don't know, this might be the last season.

So so check out the first three seasons on HBO Max and then get ready for a big season four Titans. So you may have be DC Titans. Richard had him for much longer. No, I may have to go find my ass a new gig. He's gonna be writing about the cutthroat world of children's cartoons in the nineteen sixties.

That book would kill baby, not fucking tempt me. Don't tempt Richard with a good time. I'll do it. I would read that book, just so you know. I would read that book.

And so I want to see the TV show. That's what I want. I want the plays. Oh yeah, he is Hannah, and then oh oh and the other guy, Dan Fogelbird the guy yeah he's yeah, yeah, he's Barbara. Oh my god, get all those you gotta get all the like the Nick Krawl.

Paul Sheer, Yeah, well maybe not Paul Sheer. Paul Sheer. I love Paul Sheared. I think he can. Paul She's got an amazing podcast.

Have you ever heard his podcast? Sit or Marty Krofs. I think he would be Yea Richard. Have you heard of Paul Shear's podcast? No?

Does he have a podcast? Movie podcast? Wow? Yeah, not as good as Projection Booth right, Oh no, they're way better. They're according to the Internet, they're huge.

Yeah, they're way better than anything that I'm doing. Well. Well, you can listen to people talk bullshit all you want, but if you really want to, if you really love movies, Projection Booth is your destination. With Mike White, Okay, if you say so, I'm culturecast with no, I'm no, no, no, no, I'm no no. I wasn't making a face about that.

I was making a face because you're right. The only movie podcast worth listening to on the internet is the Projection Booth. Mike, where can people find your show, the award winning Projection Booth Podcast. I don't think it's won any awards. I don't give it shit how many awards it hasn't won.

It's winning an award right now from US. Awards don't mean anything anyways. You can find that at no Rondo's no nothing anyway. Yes, you can find me at Projection Booth podcast dot com. All right, that's easy.

Yeah. Enjoy ladies and gentlemen, and you find us, Well, if you've already found us, why don't you go back to where you found us? Leave us a review, leave us a rating, Talk to people about how much you love the ranking on bass Podcast. Where else are you going to get the price of Ambergris and the taste of Durian all in one show.