121: I Bet She's Got a Bowl of Pudding in her Car

Hello. Can you hear me now? Now I can hear you. Okay, well, I'm not going to do that the whole time. I know.

That's why I wasn't really counting that. Hello. Is that your soul tree voice? Yes. That's why I'm single.

Falling Program is a proud member of the Palava family of podcasts. Check out all the shows over at palava.com. That's P-A-L-A-V-A dot com. The following feature has been rated R by the Motion Picture Association of America. It is intended for mature audiences and parental discretion is advised.

It's showtime, folks. Enjoy the show. Our nuclear reactor, pumping out one million kilowatts of power. Provide more cooling in the containment chambers. To your stations, we have a movie meltdown.

I'll be back. What's up, and welcome to Movie Meltdown. I'm Brian. I'm Greg. I'm Jay.

I am Misty. I'm Marlena. Alright. You didn't use your sultry voice. Oh, sorry.

Yeah, Greg. Alright, so we're back for another fun-filled movie geek festival here. Woo! So, to kick into this week's Geek Activities, my main one actually ties to three of us here, so I guess we'll do a tag team on this one. Marlena, you came up with this plan.

Do you want to discuss what this thing was? Well, it got kind of messed up, not through any fault of mine, but through the theater's fault. But Pee-wee's Big Adventure was supposedly playing Midnight at Baxter Avenue Theater's. And I buy the tickets, and then they say it's playing at 10. The girl behind the counter says it's playing at 10.

And then we get there at 10, and they're like, Ernest goes to camp, it's playing first. Yay! Yeah. Technically, it's Ernest goes to jail. Ernest goes to jail.

Oh. Jail. The greatest of the Ernest series. Oh, yeah. Not that I don't love Jim Varney and all, but.

Had I, yeah, I went into it expecting it to be the second one, and I wasn't so sure I was sticking around, so. Right. It at least gave me the excuse, because then, that's the thing, it was like, Had it been camp, I kind of remember little pieces of that one. It's the first movie I ever saw at the Dollar Tree. The first movie I ever saw in the theater remembering seeing it.

I was covered in mud, too. Me and Aaron were both covered in mud. We got in trouble. Your people? No, my grandma.

That was our punishment. We had to go see it. No, we were going to go see it anyways, but we got in trouble because we were covered in mud. We were buried in the dark, so we didn't get in too much trouble. I remembered it was one that you were partial to.

But, yeah, I knew I had not seen Jail at all. I don't think I have either. I have. You know, I expected horrible, especially the title sequence is bad. It's fun.

It's poking fun at a whole other series of movies. Well, sure, sure, but it's bad even in that. It's bad, yeah. It's an earnest movie, we expect, going into it. You know, what works in those movies is not the slapstick, fly-around-with-the-floor-buffer stuff that was intended to.

Which there was a lot of. A lot of it, yeah. But the subtle, quick one-hitters that he delivers impeccably. It just makes the movie worth watching. It's one I've always said about him, but I.

It kind of, again, because I sat there and had to watch him the whole time. So then I was just like, okay, well, let's see what he's bringing to the... And that's the thing. He's so talented, really. It's a shame he has to play Ernest his entire career because he really...

Maybe that's all he is. I mean, you've got to think about it. He wanted to be so much more. He wanted to be more of a. Hey, he gets to play Jet Clamp.

But he was, again, I think last, you know, couple years ago when we started talking about him, I looked it up, and he was a trained Shakespearean actor. That was his passion, was he wanted to focus on Shakespeare. And he started off doing that on stage, and then got this stupid commercial, and... That's where it took him, and I guess you go with where the money is. Right.

Sometimes you get painted into a corner. Yeah, he definitely did. But, I mean, there's moments in it where you're like, he's not only delivering pretty quick-witted stuff, that I'm sure a lot of that was probably improvised, but on top of that, he also has this performance that he brings to all these characters. Again, I get tired of people playing multiple characters, but it's funny watching. He plays two main characters in this movie, and he has a specific... facial expression for each one he does like a very specific thing with both of them and and he never is out of when he's in that character he has that one of them has like an eye motion one of them you know earnest has his normal goofy grin but i mean it's a very different way than he like manipulates his face as he goes from one character to the other and it's like it's it's a lot more credit than you would give to you know what you would expect in an earnest man And then he does those characters playing the other person.

Yeah. Which is even, you know, another stuff. Very layered performance. It is. And then on top of that, he's in trying to become Ernest, the character, is in jail, trying to become the gangster.

And so he's looking in the mirror at one point and he does probably 15 different gangster tough guy characters for movies. And you can hit. He hits every single one and you know exactly what he's doing. And. I laughed a lot at that moment.

Again, he shows you he's a skilled performer, and he ends up in these horrible moments. Because that's the thing. As it goes on, there's times when it's just so bad. And I'm just... Jim Varney already died, didn't he?

Yeah. So I couldn't remember him. I was thinking he did, but I... Which, that's the thing. I would almost hope that somebody would have found him and, you know, Tarantino'd him and had him come back where he actually did some serious acting.

He could have been hobbled with a shotgun. Yeah, that would have been awesome. That would have been awesome. Yeah, he's another one. His whole career has kind of been like that.

We watched one of his movies, so. We'll look at it later. I know. I'm keeping you listening. Which one did they watch?

There's so many moments, and it is funny. I didn't understand why they played it as a two-parter with TV's Big Adventure. Marlena, you missed out because you were all excited when he got to the breakfast machine in Pee Wee. Yeah. The same thing is going on throughout.

I mean, I don't know. I don't remember the other movies or other Ernest movies, like, filled with contraptions and machinery and stuff in his house. Yeah. Is it, like, who's the guy? Is it Rube Goldberg?

Oh, yeah. A series of. complicated mechanism to perform a simple task yeah. And he's got that just to turn on the television to turn on the tv yeah yeah yeah that's amazing it's it's yeah actually. Like i some of the movies that have that like are my favorite delicatessen has that yeah and it's just like i get super excited. About yeah i mean it's got that whole point well i mean he walks into the yard and it looks and again we decided it was like the poor man's version of peewee's house i mean it It's the ghetto version of Pee-wee's house.

It's got a large, you know, lit up ice cream cone. And he's even got a little dog like Pee-wee. Yeah, there were all these parallels that I was like, okay, now I kind of see why they did the double feature here. But it does, I mean, it pales in comparison. You can't put anything up against that in Pee-wee.

That's just gold right there. Yeah. But it is funny how much of that stuff, I mean, you really could see... almost trying it, but I don't know, I mean, maybe it started off that way, but to me it felt like, you know, since this one came afterwards, there was very much of tapping into that, you know, that kids, you know, they started gearing him more and more towards kids as he got dumber and dumber as the movies went on, so I think there was almost a conscious, hey, let's kind of, you know, Pee-Wee's popular, let's kind of go the direction of Pee-Wee, and He just didn't get busted. Right. We decided, yeah, Greg, go ahead with your theory.

Yeah, I decided during the intermission that Ernest should have gotten caught in a porn theater, and his career probably would have taken off even more. You know, been a little bit more. He could have changed direction. Yeah. It might have actually helped him.

He could have fulfilled his dream of being a Shakespearean actor. That's right. Possibly. But then what if he'd been taken seriously in that? Had he been caught doing something like that?

No. No. I mean, he probably would have a better shot. Even yesterday, my friend's mom was like, I can't believe you're going to go watch that pervert. She's like, a pervert for doing something that every man and woman does?

Yeah, what a pervert. If it was a kiddie movie that he had gotten caught playing with himself in, that's one thing, but it was porn. And that's like a common misconception. People think that. I think that's half of what killed his career because people don't realize, like, no, it was like an adult film with adults. but like.

In a theater where this goes on. He wasn't just at the multiplex touching himself. I mean, he was in a theater that was built for that purpose, whether they admit to it now. It wasn't like the Dollar Tree store. Right.

You know, the dog movie, watching Ernest Goes to Camp or anything. That would be awesome. That movie theater is actually down the street from my wife's grandma's house in Sarasota, Florida. I drove past, it was many years afterwards, but I've driven past where that was in. The Did you go in?

I don't think it's a porn theater anymore. But go in and take pictures of yourself. Here I am in the sea. I might touch myself. Here's where the floor's sticky.

It's been years and the floor's still sticky. That's every porn place you're going to go to. I've never been to one. That's what I hear. Every movie theater.

Porn just makes it worse. So, yeah, that was, I don't know, any more on Ernest? No, nothing more on Ernest. Greg, it's... Marlena, you don't get to play this part.

Right. Do you want to tell that story? I'll let Greg finish his story. I don't have any more to the story. You can certainly tell what you were doing.

Well, I mean, none of my friends wanted to stick around in a movie theater for four solid hours. They were there. Yeah, we were there, but she ditched us. Anyway. Well, the other two friends that I came there with.

There you go. I mean, if you hadn't come, I wouldn't have left, just because I wouldn't have left Brian there. So you say now. I would have been solo peewee. Would you be a loner, Dougie?

He wouldn't have been that. creepiest person in the theater. Wow, that's a compliment for me. I think I had to pause to make sure you got it right. You had to think about it. Maybe.

Probably not. It's a close call. Across the street, my co-worker's band was playing. I love them. I really do.

They were not well received. Number one, they're like a 70s cover band. They cover like Alice Cooper songs and Led Zeppelin songs. Actually, in most bars I would see that going over a lot. Well, yeah, this is at Highland Taproom, though.

Most dog bars, yes, but Highland Taproom people are just kind of like. A little too trendy for the 70s rock. Yeah, I think so. But we just sat out on the porch and pretended that we were paying attention to the music. We were really just laughing at the guy in the band's awesome print dice shirt.

It was like black and it was like baggy and he had it tucked into his like dad jeans. And then the dice print on it was like huge neon dice. Classy. We're like, check out that awesome shirt. There's dad jeans now.

Just like mom jeans. If you've got mom jeans, I guess you have to have dad jeans. Your dad wears them all the time. You've seen your dad's jeans. You know, like the baggy kind of Levi's, the white tennis shoes and the belt, and they're kind of like puffy.

Yeah, that's right. He does, doesn't he? Do they have elastic, too, in addition to a belt? A built-in belt? I forget about that.

My dad has a belt. Dad jeans. I never did think about that. Okay, just a minor side note. Have you seen the pajama jeans commercial?

Yes. No. They look awful. Oh, my God. Is this where we've come to as a society?

I mean, it's another one of those infomercials. I'm like, oh, this is the end of the world. Like the blueberry bush? I give up. What's the blueberry bush?

The blueberry bush, it was like. Tired of paying $ 10 for blueberries at the grocery store? Try the blueberry bush. Yeah, just don't buy blueberries. You get fresh blueberries every day.

They make it sound like this one blueberry bush that you're going to hang from a pot in your kitchen is going to produce a farm's worth of blueberries. I only eat blueberries that come in boxes of muffin mix. Little freeze-dried pellets. They're blue dye and sugar. Oh, no, no.

But yeah, sometimes they have to try so hard. It's like, tired of wearing jeans? They're trying so hard on that one. Hey, fat ass. Isn't it hard to cram yourself into jamming?

They might as well. Don't jeans suck when you go to the buffet? Well, they do the worst case scenario of the girl pulls her jeans back and there's like a... She's like... And there's like... the rivet imprints on her.

Throw her hands up in desperation. Oh god, I'm dying. I love how dire every situation in infomercials is. It's like, and they yell at you just to get the point across. That's why Billy Mays was so perfect.

I love Billy Mays. But I hate the Shamwell guy. I love Shamwell guy. Are you serious? He's a woman beater.

I know, but she had it coming. Okay, you said that. I am not claiming that at all. His face creeps me out. I don't like it.

His face does creep me out, but he's so, like, high. He is, like, he does a lot of coke, I think. He's very entertaining. So you're attracted to guys who do a lot of coke. Right.

I'm not attracted to it. I haven't come into it. She was a hooker. And that's why she gets beaten. No, I can't remember the reason.

There was a legit reason. As long as they're a hooker. And remember, this is Marlena's day. A coke addict infomercial guy that's picking up hookers and beats her, she had it coming. I mean, she didn't use the Sam Weber idea.

Right. For clean-up afterwards? I don't know. But let me clarify. I'm not attracted to Vince.

He is creepy. You know his name? His face is creepy. But he's entertaining. I'm watching a little bit, too.

Let me get you a ShamWow to wipe the sweat off. No, thank you. But, yeah. Oh, Lord. Anyway.

Sidetracked. Okay, so we wrapped up Ernest, I'm assuming. Yeah. Pee Wee's Big Adventure. Do you want to...

I mean, there's not much to say. I'm sitting there last night watching it for the umpteenth time, and I'm just like, this may very well be one of those... I mean, it's a very short list for me, but just perfect movies. Like, I don't know what you could do with this movie. It slows down when...

And there's good lines in it, but when he goes into the dinosaur mouth and is sitting with. What's her name? The one that goes to France. That whole section kind of gets a little... Okay, it's getting a little slow.

It's dragging a little bit. That's why you have a giant man with a bone chasing you around. Right. But yeah, there's still parts of it that... I mean, literally, I was laughing.

I'm trying not to. I'm like, okay, I'm not going to sit here and laugh. And you still, you laugh... You can't help it. Again, I probably got more genuine laughs out of that last night than most comedies I watch now in the last five years.

And his delivery, like, when he's walking up, he's going to Francis' house, and he's walking up the driveway, and he stops and kind of composes himself and gives that little shudder, that peewee shudder, and then walks on. It just, I mean, the entire crowd laughed, and all he did was just make a little tick And that's just classic stuff. You know, I don't know how you can even write that or plan to do something like that in a scene, but it works somehow. Well, and it shows the difference because they were in the lobby playing the big top peewee on the little screen while we went in there. And that's the thing.

It's like I said, it's been so long since I've seen that one, but I remember even the first time I saw it going, this isn't the same. And it goes to show that major difference, which, number one, he also was taking it in a different direction because he became popular with kids then. But the first one is so much a Tim Burton movie. Like, there are so many times when you're just, wow, this is just out and out Tim Burton right here. Tim Burton.

Yeah. And that's the thing. I was like, it kind of, because before they were playing random old trailers and they played the Willy Wonka Tim Burton trailer. That was just like polar opposites. I mean, look at how good he is. in his first movie, his first full length movie versus the crap that he's been cranking out lately.

And it's just, it, it's sort of pains me to watch, you know, he's so talented back in the old movies and, and had such visual style, but could also balance it with, you know, a well put together movie and, and not horrible CGI that they didn't have yet. So I don't know. It's just it, but I mean, so much of that is so well done from even a technical standpoint. Like there's one or two times where like the laugh comes from the editing. Like they actually like, the way that he composed the shot or the way that they took it and edited it after is the joke.

I mean, again, that kind of stuff is things that get, you know, missed in movies that just, you know, get cranked out by a studio and nobody puts any time or care into them. And it's funny, I mean, this was a pretty low-budget movie with a first-time director, but they still, like, spent so much time on all these little technical things that still just make it hold up all these years later. It's still, like, impressive to watch, even as just a film, if you want to call Pee-Wee's Big Adventure that. But I would because it's awesome. I think one thing that you could overlook easily, especially comparing the two, is Phil Hartman.

Yeah. Because he was the co-writer on this. Yeah, which I forget that until the credits come up every time. I'm like, no wonder this is so damn good. anything he ever did was fantastic he was amazing and has his little cameo yeah. I noticed that I forgot about that I.

Forgot what his cameo was he's at the very end he's a reporter right that's yeah interviewing Francis. Yeah we didn't go me and Jay did not I was gimping and didn't feel like going anywhere Corey's all bruised and he's almost bruised and I didn't like that so But, yeah, I remember watching this movie so many times when I was a kid. How excited me and Aaron were when we found out my grandma had the peewee dance song. That's what it was, the peewee dance song. I think an entire generation knew it as that.

It was only later I found out it has. A real name. I don't know how many times me and Aaron listened to Tequila over and over and over, trying to do the dance. Yeah, it was hours and hours and weeks and months of entertainment right there. Were you guys wearing snowflake shoes?

Probably. Good. And as popular as that part was, because that even had its own song and video. Didn't it? Yeah, I kind of think they cut that part out and made it a video, yeah.

It still is very entertaining. We all see it coming now, but I was thinking last night as it started, I was like, this is really a weird movie. Like, then that's the beauty of it. Like, it's almost surreal at times. Like, you're about to get your ass kicked in a biker bar.

You're going to die. Your final request is to put on giant shoes and dance around to tequila. I was like, who would write that? Like, who other than Phil Hartman would write that? Like, that's, I mean, it's genius in how weird it is.

Yeah. Right. Oh. Actually, one thing that I always remember, and it's a little scene, but Jan Hooks doing the tour guide is fabulous. Again, another, like, performance just total character like she's nothing like that in anything else you see her in she created that character and it's like priceless.

And the gum chewing I always forget that she takes the gum out of her mouth at the end but by that time you're like stop it with the gum stop it stop it and then she takes it out and then just I don't know it's very. Funny I think my favorite parts are the Alamo references I don't know why like when he wakes up and they're like what do you remember he's like I remember I remember the album. Yay! I don't know why. It does make Texas look awesome.

I think it's just because I have such a soft spot in my heart for Texas. I know. But I just want to. Oh, sorry. I just want to go there and sing the intro part of the song and see if everybody, like, I just, I hope that it's really like that when I get there.

When we went to Texas, how many times was that done? We, we did it a lot. No one else really responded. You're ruining it for me, damn it. Cause yeah, when, uh, yeah, me and Jessica and Marlena, I don't know, I'll put it in a different order.

I shuffled it up there. Me and Marlena and Jessica went to Texas. I don't know how many times that reference was made. We didn't even go to the Alamo. No.

We should have. I know. Road trip. Hell yeah. I, I, I've always wanted to go.

My wife, she went to San Antonio this last fall, and she toured the Alamo. And I told her, I said, please ask the tour guide if you can see the basement with a straight face. How many times a day do you think they get that? It doesn't matter. They probably hate that reference.

They'll probably say it in the speech, there is no basement in the Alamo. It's probably, okay, first and foremost, that's how they start the tour. And if they talked about Adobe, I would probably shit my pants. Adobe. She seems very pleased with it.

Right. So, okay, the other thing I need to address, and I think I've always thought this, and I remember last time I watched it, kind of thinking it again, but last night just reinforced it. What the hell is Pee-wee thinking? Dottie's hot! Oh, yeah.

Absolutely. Other than she sounds like a cartoon character. Well, because she is a cartoon character. Yeah. But, uh, yep.

Dottie is... Pee-wee's a loner. He's a razor. He comes to his senses. But, I mean, still, he's fighting it, and I'm just like...

I know he's sort of a little kid, so ooh, girls are gross. And I mean, you know, like, I love Pee-wee, but he's kind of gay. Kind of gay. I mean, I know he's not, but like. But not even as a character.

He's just childlike. And like, prepubescent doesn't even get sex, which is why I guess they make him think girls are icky. But yeah, I mean, because I was watching that. I was like, he comes off peculiar, but not really... I think that's the same thing.

It's not that he comes off gay at all. It's just that he is... He's just a child. He's just a child. There's a lot of kids that I guess you can kind of mix that signal up with.

But, you know, I mean, there's Izzy's cousin, Jared. If you looked at him, he almost acts like Pee Wee Herman. He doesn't sound like him, too. He kind of looks like him, too. But it's because he's...

He doesn't understand. He's still young. He's still, uh, ew, girls are icky. Don't kiss me. Ew.

You know. He's kind of whiny. But, you know, I think that's kind of the same thing. He comes off almost childlike. It doesn't really...

Yeah. He just doesn't get it yet. Right. We'll all come around and find Elizabeth Daly. I had to check, because I remembered looking at her last time and finding out she did all those cartoon voices.

She was in Valley Girl. She's in Valley Girl. She was in, like, a bunch of 80 movies, and then she switched over. Oh, she was in Tommy? Yeah, she switched over to doing voice work, and she's Tommy Pickles.

She's Buttercup. Yeah, I know she's Buttercup. She's Pickles. Oh, really? Yeah.

Buttercup. Powerpuff Girls. Really? Yeah. She's, like, several times when they kept trying to, like, reinvent the Flintstones, they kept making her Bam Bam.

Like, there were all these weird, yeah, things that they, but she's in, like, a hundred different, you can go look her up, she's in every one. She's made a career at voice work. Yeah. But she's got a good voice for it. Well, that's the other thing, this, and that's the thing, I knew she'd done the cartoon stuff, this is the one I had, like, again, sad as I did it last night, it was like three in the morning, I was going, holy shit, she's E.G.

Daly? That was my new discovery, way just, and I had to get a hold of Katie, because we, on the summer school episode, we were just talking about how much we liked the E.G. Daly song. E.G. Daly from the 80s, who actually had, like, a ton of songs, almost all on soundtracks.

She was a legitimate pop star. She was, like, musical guest on Saturday Night Live, one episode. E.G. Daly is Elizabeth Daly. I didn't know she had a separate music career.

I thought that was an entirely different person. I don't think I'd ever looked at E.G. Daly to see that it looks just like Elizabeth Daly. But, yeah, I didn't know that was the same person. That was kind of a revelation last night.

Was she pulling a Hannah Montana on you? Yeah, I think she did. Put that wig on, it's a whole different person. Best of both worlds. So, yeah.

You know, I wanted to address this. Before the movie, they played a Mr. Bean short. I love British humor, actually, but I don't get Mr. Bean at all.

The very end of it, I thought it was funny, and I couldn't figure out why they were playing that. But you guys were mentioning Pee-wee's mannerisms. It's almost like he could go a whole movie without saying anything. It's just his expressions and his movements and things like that. Mr.

Bean never says anything, so... I was just wondering if maybe that's the tie-in right there. Have you seen any of the old Mr. Bean shows, like the actual TV shows? This, I think, was from fucking hilarious.

I think this was just a clip from one of the later shows. But I had found some that were online and had Izzy watch them, and she got really into them because she thought they were hilarious. One with his, he's going to bed and he's got his teddy bear, and he's pretty fucking funny. I guess maybe I've just never given it a proper chance. It's a hit and miss thing.

Well, if you watch the earlier ones, they're better than the later ones. Because with anything, when things are early and they're fresh, they're kind of like. I don't know, they're not forced. And as it gets older, people are like, oh, we're going to make it more funny. We're going to force it down your throat.

And then it just gets to the point where it's just stupid. And I think that's kind of the way. That series became, as it progressed, they were like, oh, we're going to be really funny now, you know. Maybe a better tie-in might have been the first movie, because you're talking about his, you know, physical humor. That's what I noticed on the Ernest stuff, was how much, like, there's a lot of his stuff that really, like, almost was like Chaplin kind of physical humor.

Like, it really could have been silent and just, you know, played up. And again, kids would laugh at it, because he's falling down and running into stuff, and I mean, it does play on that very old school version of physical comedy that I guess Mr. Bean tapped into, too. Well, one of the best parts, back on Ernest, the brothers, the security guards. They were pretty funny, actually.

The old man. They're pretty much like Penn and Teller. Yeah. You know, you've got the idiot straight man and then the one wise one that won't talk but, you know, figures everything out. Yep.

Even though he's a freak. He sells most of his scenes. It's like Jay and Silent Bob. It's all that, and I mean, it's that classic almost Laurel and Hardy kind of stuff anyway. And they do such a good job.

And you're, you know, when he walks, every scene I think the one brother walks up and smacks Ernest on the back of the head. And you know something funny's coming because they're introducing their little skit for the next three minutes. And it works it's again on like the lowest level like it's they're probably one of the highlights but yeah there's so many other things that are just so dumb in that movie that it pains me that there's good things in it i wish it could just all be crap so i could write it off but i mean there's moments when i'm like some of these guys you know have something to offer it's just i. Wish it was in a better movie there's one point with the brothers and I'll have to mention this and then we can move on.

And I won't even do my geek week because I've gone too much. But in the background, okay, the brothers, the one that talks has already established that his brother doesn't trust anybody, you know, and that's how the dual earnest, you know, he can, he can tell them apart. But in the background of the bank, the one brother that won't talk is frisking his, his other, his brother and, They don't mention it. It's for probably a second and a half that you see it. It's just one of the funniest things because they set it up 45 minutes before and there it is.

Again, it's not even in focus. You just see that it's happening. Those are the good kind of jokes. The stuff that's just subtle and understated and not stupid slapsticky in your face. The background stuff is usually better in those kind of movies.

It is sad that they spend 20 minutes on floor waxer, floor buffer humor. Yeah. Sliding all over everywhere. It's a weird movie. Yeah.

He's being chased by the file cabinets. I'm just, what am I watching here? What the hell is going on? All right. So, do we want to move on to you guys?

Yeah, move on. Oh, is it our turn now? I guess, Miss T and J, do you have stuff for us? We watched movies. We got a lot of stuff.

We watched a couple movies. Yeah. Which should we start with? Start with List. We watched The Last Lovecraft, The Call of Cthulhu, or The Relic of Cthulhu.

The Relic of Cthulhu, yes. And what did you think of this movie? I thought it was pretty funny for such a low budget. It had its moments. It had its moments, yeah.

I thought it was pretty good. The friend was hilarious. Yeah, the friend was good. I don't remember their names because they didn't really rank high enough for me to give them names. But his friend, because it's a boring-ass guy, they work at an office or some kind of business.

They work at Squirrelly Squirrel. Yeah. Gift baskets. Yeah. Anyways, you have the one guy who's all serious and the other guy who's just fucking retarded and got his action figures that he plays with at work and gives them voices and talks to them, which he was hilarious through the whole movie.

Yeah. But, yeah, it had its moments. Some parts were just kind of like, eh, and then some parts were like, oh, my God, this is fucking hilarious. Yeah, sometimes it got a little slow. It got weird.

It's a Cthulhu movie. Yeah, well, it's not really a dark, Cthulhu movie. It's kind of a slapstick-y, you know, oh my god, he's coming to get us all. We've got to, you know. Which is unusual, really.

It was good. It was worth watching. Anything else to say about that one? No, I watched it. You know, But don't take it too seriously.

It's hard to take this movie seriously. Yeah, it's pretty funny. I like it. The run of Cthulhu movies usually is pretty... The bar is set pretty low.

Yeah, and that's what aggravates me. You've got such a great story and such great material to work off of, but yet they just. Churn out shit. Nobody knows how to do it right. Yeah, and so this one, they come off real slapsticky almost, and they know they're not going to make a good movie, and they know they don't have a high budget.

So. It actually works, I think. I think it comes out pretty funny. If you go into it not being completely serious, it's got the nerds that are all. Into Cthulhu mythos, and you're not getting it right.

That's the guy living in his mom's basement. The guy living in his mom's basement. The more you describe it, I think I've seen the trailer, and it actually did look funny, if I'm thinking of the right one. It's funny. Yeah, it is pretty funny.

If you get a chance, check it out. It shouldn't be too bad. Don't take it too seriously. I'm going to skip around and do the last one. We watched Tucker and Dale vs.

Evil. Yes. We had gotten this via a friend. I know it's probably not out yet now at all, is it? No.

I don't think it's out. It's select theaters and film festivals. Film festivals. What is it called? Tucker and Dale vs.

Evil. Most people have probably seen the trailer for it already. Yeah. It's making its way out there. Is that Adam Puddick?

Alan Tudyk. I got it wrong. Sorry, I was making up with Adam Baldwin. Sorry. Wash from Fireflies.

Fucking awesome. For a redhead. It's, you know, the movie's fucking hilarious. I'm not going to say anything about it aside from I thought it was really good. It plays off of all the wrong turns.

And crazy psycho hillbilly movies. Which there are a multitude. All the cliches, yeah. All the cliches involved in it. Because that's what it is.

They just want to enjoy their summer home. Yeah. You know, if you live out in the backwoods and you're tired of all the stereotypes that get labeled to you and everybody else around you, you'll enjoy this movie. And if you enjoy Wrong Turn and Crazy Tale Billy. Movies, you'll enjoy this movie.

So Brian will sleep through it. Yeah, so Brian will sleep through it. I think it's pretty fast. I don't remember any slow parts in it. It just kept going. throughout the whole thing it was awesome.

It was chock full of awesome from beginning to end I love Alan Tudyk even though I got his name wrong I'm probably saying his last name wrong fuck I don't. Know how to I've never been able to say it correctly just assign him a new name that's what I do just call him Wash anybody that cares is going to know who he is. Or what's his name from Dodgeball was he Steve the Pirate Steve the Pirate God I love that guy he should be in most movies He is just chock full of awesome. This movie was so awesome. I loved it.

I want to watch it again. I want to watch it right now. We should watch it instead of the movie we're going to watch this week. What else did we watch? We watched Primal.

Which was something. It was definitely something. Which, again, proves you don't fucking go to Australia. Everything there wants to kill you. Yeah.

There's nothing safe in Australia. I'm afraid to go to Australia. I'm sure there's probably places where there's not going to be things jumping out at you. But Caves that want to rape you, apparently. Caves that want to rape you and, you know, things that want.

To eat you. Bugs that eat your car. Yeah, bugs that eat your car. Are there really bugs in Australia that eat your car? Because that would really suck.

They ate the tires. We do have Australian listeners, so if you're out there, let us know if you, on a daily basis, are almost killed. I'm afraid. Or run into giant bugs that eat your car. The horned giants were tiny bugs.

Tiny bugs. It's like termites or something, but they ate part of the. Rubber-eating termites. They ate the fucking tent, Eller supplies, they ate the tires. Yeah, I was like, what the fuck?

You've got to be kidding me. There's bugs that eat rubber? Come on. The whole thing was these jackass Australians, which I was happy to know that apparently it's not just Americans that are jackasses, because I hated all these juice bags, too, because they were just horrible. You hated all these people.

They were just Oh, there's one girl. She was a fucking cunt. And I don't feel bad saying that because she said it over and over again. So I don't feel bad calling her a cunt because she was. She introduced the word into the scenario.

She was, yes, she did. You can throw it around. Yeah, it's okay. But they were all going. There was this cave painting that they want to go see because apparently nobody's seen it for 200 some odd years.

So let's all go see it. BSD. Yeah, and they have to go through this cave. And this one girl, apparently, she's in a glass of bubble tea going to the cave. Pass it out.

Apparently, apparently, well, apparently, they made some brief reference to her being kidnapped or, you know, basement for months. I don't, I missed the whole prequel. It sounds like a prequel. I don't know. So she was afraid to go in the cave.

I'm not ruining much because this is all happening at the very beginning of the movie. She like, she was in the cave. She freaks out, passes out, hits her head, blood hits the cave and the cave comes to life or something. I don't fucking know what. Yeah.

That's, Sounds like I don't need to see it. Just remember, just don't drop blood all over the place and you'll be okay. It's not like I'm ruining anything. I'm not telling you how it ends. yet. You can't spoil the shit.

Out of it. It's not bad. They kill. It wasn't really super bad, but the characters, I'd say nine out of ten of them, you just can't wait for them to fucking die. And the one that I did like died first.

Yes. The enjoyable ones seemed to die off, but... No, the one that I liked. The one that you liked, yeah. There was only one.

They killed him real fast. And the other guy that you're just like wishing he'd die is a complete fucking. This useless piece of shit. They like to drag those guys out until the end. Oh, yeah.

This guy's just useless. I'm like, he can't die fast enough. Oh, my God. I wanted to beat this guy. Yeah.

I wanted to beat him to death. Mm-hmm. Good times. And then we watched the entire series of The Walking Dead. Yes.

Which was so fucking awesome. Oh my good god damn, I love that show. I like it. I love Norman Reedus and his crazy ass redneck ass. Oh, I want to give him a big old hug, but he'd probably kill me.

No, he liked you. No, he didn't. He looked uncomfortable. I was a little molested. I think he's just uncomfortable in general.

Yeah. Because he was all fine and friendly and oh my god. As soon as the picture took... Well, why were you touching him like that? You can't tell.

He did. He was so nice. Norman Reyes was so nice. You get a picture with him and it looks like you're giving him an anal probe. Dude, seriously.

Our friend Heather, he has a perfect Jordan Cannellotto awkward 90s pose. The hands in the pockets. He was so awesome. But yeah, I fucking love that show. I love everything about that show.

I'm telling you. Michael Rooker. Oh my god. He needs to be... I can't wait till they bring him back i mean they set it up for him to you know have another yeah how did he get younger I don't know.

That's like a mall rat. He looks old. And that was like 20 years ago. I'm like, what the fuck? How did he get...

What? I think like 60 or something. But he's like. He's gotta be getting up there. He was in shape in this movie.

He was crowned. I'm like, God. He was fucking crazy. Yeah, he's... I mean, a horrible character, but he plays him amazing.

Oh, yeah. You hate his guts. Oh, yeah. Ah, but. He looks good in those jeans, though.

You can tell him that. We'll see him later this year. Yeah, I love that movie. It's like... I don't know anything about that movie, except for.

Movie or series? TV series. We watched it all at once, so to me it was just one big fucking long movie. It's pretty cinematic. She was like, you want to stop?

And I was like, no, we keep going. We'll watch the whole damn thing. Especially the first one. I stayed up until like 4 o'clock in the morning watching it. Yeah, it should be.

I love that movie. Party animals. I'm telling you. But then, I just kept watching it, and I'm just like... Come on, the show.

There was nothing I disliked about the show. I can't think of anything that I didn't like, except for the fact that they were camping out in the middle of the open. I was just like, how unprotected could. You be just out in the open? Oh, we're in the rock quarry.

But whatever. I don't know if I can complain about it too much. Well, they were away from everybody. They figured everybody was in the cities. There were too many trees and cover.

They needed open plains so they could see somebody coming. Yeah, you had to be able to have a good, clear line of vision. Yeah. But they slept in tents. I feel like there's probably a safer place to sleep in tents.

A tent is a force field. Unless you're in Australia. I mean, I'm just thinking there's endless supplies. You can walk into a Home Depot. No one's going to stop you.

Build a damn shelter. Like a legit shelter. There was an abandoned farmhouse that he saw. They had a deadbolt. That's really a spoiler.

People were dead in there. But you can just drag their asses outside, board your ass in, and you're awesome. That house was owned by the horse, then. I mean, like, a warehouse. You know, like, go to a warehouse.

There's going to be food around. If you're in a city, there's going to be, like, stores of food. There might be, like. Yeah, they didn't want to stay in the city, though. Well, even, like, a little town.

Yeah, little towns have Home Depots and stuff. They didn't think that far ahead. No, let's stay in this totally unsafe tent in the middle of kind of a wooded area. Outside of Atlanta. My favorite episodes were actually, like, back in the city.

Especially the end of the first episode when he goes back in is amazing. But then that other one when they go back for the guns, I really like that whole when they've got the city laid out and they've got the plan and you go over here and distract them and I'm going to run around here. Like, that whole episode is so much fun of just them, like, playing cat and mouse with a whole bunch of zombies. And I like that. What did you do before this as pizza delivery guy?

That guy's awesome. Yeah, I like that guy. And that whole episode is just a lot of fun. Yeah. I mean. and I'm dwelling on this, but like, damn, in the, in nature, there's like bears and shit and.

Snakes and stuff. There could be zombie bears. The fuck's worse than a fucking zombie? That's a movie right there, zombie bear. I kept waiting for zombie horse.

When's the zombie horse coming back? Zombie bear, zombie bear, zombie, wait, I'm trying to get this up. Zombie bear versus monster lion or something. Which, update, on the monster madness bracket, Sharktopus did win. As it should have.

Hell yeah, kicked all sorts of ass. It was Sharktopus for God's sake. It's weird to see Eric Roberts, and he's in, like, the shitty soap opera. It's like, how do you work. Yeah, Eric Roberts.

Yeah, Eric Roberts. How do you, like, work so far backwards? I was in Sharktopus. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Julia Roberts' brother.

Yeah, he was the. How do you start off famous and then work your way downwards? It seems to be happening a lot more lately. How do you work your way down to soap operas? There's a lot more.

Didn't Franco go back to doing soap operas? Yeah. James Franco. Like recently? Yeah.

We'll get to part of that in a second. I got a story about that. I knew you had one, but I thought he did too. There's a lot of people that are kind of going back to soaps and I don't understand why other than I mean it's a paycheck you. Know they're cancelling all the soaps that's true not all of them we're getting.

Rid of what general hospital no they're keeping general. Hospital we're getting rid of all my children. And days of work I'm not taking part in a lot of this one life to live one life to live shit I'm just. Talking about young and restless is young and restless good I think, I don't know. I've watched...

I'll get into. That in a minute. I got rid of Santa Barbara, damn it. I got rid of Passions. Passions!

I love Passions! I actually did love Passions. Damn, I fell in a wall! That was probably the best one of all. I worked with someone who never sent Julian after Passions.

I never actually watched Passions. I watched it vicariously through Spike. Yeah, that's the only reason I knew what Passions was, was because Spike watched it. But yeah, anyway, back to The Walking Dead kicked ass. I love Norman Reedus and his crazy-ass redneckness.

Gosh. And then after the final episode, we had to get online and Google, like, what the hell did the doctor whisper? And we're not going to say. We're not. Because you can get online and look it up your own name.

Or you can read the comic books. Or you can read the comic books. We're going to have to read pictures. I know. That's kind of what we figured, though.

But then I finally, finally, after, like, how long trying to get Boyfriend to watch it, we finally sat down and watched The Hitcher. The original. Wow. I love the original. Fucking awesome.

Yeah. I love the original. Rucker Hauer. God damn it. He's a fucking nutball.

Holy shit. In real life, too. He's fucking awesome. He is. Oh, my God.

I love Rucker Hauer. He's one of those guys that if you were in the same room, it would be really uncomfortable because you think at any moment he's just going to start screaming at you. Well, he is because I've seen him. He's so fucking nice. Yeah.

Yeah. He's so awful. Those are the guys you've got to worry about. I know. It's okay.

He can yell at me if he wants to. While they're doing some Guinness, I don't care. Yeah. Have you seen all the commercials he's done? Way back in the day, apparently, people were taking him way too fucking seriously.

He's like, ah. So they did this whole series of Guinness commercials of him just being completely goofy. Just off the wall and some of the shit. My favorite is just him sitting there in this chair that's completely god awful tacky chair with this big aquarium window behind it and a dolphin swims by it's not easy being a dolphin and that's the whole fucking commercial. That's amazing.

I didn't even realize they tapped into that type of, like, weird, offbeat humor back then. Yeah, it's funny. I mean, that's what, like, Old Spice and those commercials that I love. Banged on that. Watch the Rutger Hauer Guinness commercials.

It's fucking awesome. It's just so off the wall and weird that it's just, like, you just sit mesmerized. You're like, What the hell did I just see? Did that really just happen? The Hitcher, yeah, great movie.

I always loved that one. I knew it was going to be a good movie, but I just. It took forever to get you to watch it. You didn't want to watch it. It took two days to get you to watch it, because we started watching it one day.

Moods. And then you're like, oh, I can't get into this. I'm like, oh. Didn't they make a remake of that? Yeah.

Sean Bean plays him? Is that the name right? I don't know. I eventually might watch it just, I don't know, for the sake of saying I did. I'm pretty sure he was in like the Lord of the Rings movies too.

I just avoided it because I love the first one so much. I do want to see it, but yeah, you were getting mad for a while at a... C... C. Thomas Howe?

He's a bitch! It's pretty easy to get mad at C. Thomas Howe. A little crying, whiny-ass little bitch. He's C.

Thomas Howe. He's always... He was good in Red Dawn. He was good in The Outsiders. He's good in The Outsiders.

That was probably his finest acting moment. He was great in Soul Brother. Soul Man. Soul Man, no. He went steadily down to...

I've never seen it. I don't have any interest to ever watch it. He, like, moved into the direct-to-DVD market there for quite a while. That, and, uh, spoiler alert, uh, if you haven't seen the movie, uh... Jennifer Jason Leigh?

She fucking dies! He pulls her in half! I forgot! I was like, oh my god, he fucking killed her! No way!

You waited till the next scene where he's in, like, the sheriff's office, and you look over at me, did they just kill her? That's, again, one more reason why I love that movie. It's so unexpected, and so, I mean, just. He couldn't have fucking shot the ignition in the damn fucking truck and killed it. I wouldn't have fucking yanked her in half.

Story-wise, it's so original and so impressive. You were like, well, why doesn't C. Thomas Howell just distract him while the police go on tire? Yeah. You were yelling at the movie.

Yeah, they're just going to stand around like a bunch of bumbling idiots. He's distracted. He's not paying attention to what's going on in the rear view. Oh, you know, actually, I saw the new one. I didn't hate it.

I mean, it was amazing. What is that guy's name? Sean Bean? I keep wanting to call him Mr. Bean, and I'm pretty sure Mr.

Bean was not in the history. That would be awesome. That would be a very different movie. They have a sequel, too, don't they? Like with C.

Thomas Howell? Yeah, they did a bad sequel, didn't they? C. Thomas Howell. Why are you doing this to me?

Oh, wow, there's a Hitcher, too. Yeah, Jake Busey. But it didn't... Oh, wow, Jake Busey. Yeah, it was a straight-to-DVD kind of sequel.

Nobody's going to beat the crazy of Rutger Hauer. Wow. I don't see anything about a Hitcher. not rucker howard crazy no jbc's just fucking nuts is also a good actor is the thing and most other people that just act crazy are just crazy. And i was going back and looking at pictures god he was a beautiful man back in the day rucker howard oh my fucking damn. It was legitimately nutty watch him in blade runner i know he's half naked most of the time i.

Know right I was watching an interview about him afterwards and I'm like, look how pretty he is. Isn't he pretty? Look at this. But yeah, Rutger Howard is just so fucking, he's buckets of nuts and I love him, but he's... I don't.

Remember you getting all excited during Nighthawks. I don't, because I don't know. I don't know. He's pretty cool in Nighthawks, too. I don't know, because he wasn't the crazy that drawed me in.

Oh my God. I'm looking at pictures of C. Thomas Howell as. An old man. Ugh.

It's weird. Yeah. He was on that magic show. He's so old. Like, former celebrity people trying to become magicians.

What shit is old? I know. Holy fucking shit. Is that from the sci-fi original movie? Because he was in like a.

How does he look like him? How does he look that old? See, Tom is grandpa. I know. I mean, come on.

He was like. What was the movie. That we watched? 15 years older than me. Shouldn't he just be like 37 now?

The movie that I was trying to figure out, Rucker Harrell, that I thought we watched. What was the Rucker Harrell we did for the show? Oh, he's at least 40. Yeah, he's got to be 40. He was born in 1966.

Didn't we do a Rucker Harrell movie for the show? We did. What was the Rucker Harrell we did? With the creature. Oh, split second.

Did we not do that for the podcast? Yeah. How come I can't find it on... I can't find it on the. We magically found that one.

It's not available. No, I mean, he can't find the podcast. Oh, I think that one's gone already. Like, we only had so much space, so I think the early ones have dropped off. Because that was like...

No, we fucking saw that. It's not on here. I remember trying to find that myself. I couldn't find it anywhere. That was one we found at one of the conventions or we wouldn't have seen it.

Oh. Yeah. We've watched more than one Rucker Hauer movie. We watched Nighthawks. Nighthawks and Split Seconds.

He might be in something else. I don't know. Definitely those two, yeah. There was one. It was in 2003.

Okay. Because, yeah, you tried to tell me we didn't watch Nighthawks. I started watching the trailer. I'm like. That's not the one that I was talking about, though.

Because you're like, it's a movie and everything's wet. I'm like. Yeah, it's got water. And it's got this alien. And it's got this alien.

That split second. Who was the female... Oh, Kim Cattrall. Kim Cattrall. Oh, yeah.

Well, that was my main complaint of the entire movie. Yeah, I know. It's like, okay, there's some bad writing and some choppy editing, but let's talk about Kim Cattrall. Well, yeah, back to the hitcher. It's like, we had to try to figure out why, because he was like, why is John Ryder's character doing this?

You know? He's fucking crazy. And we were trying, I looked it up online on forums, I'm like, is it just because he's fucking nuts? Yeah. And some of them had these different theories, like, well, he had a death wish, and that's why he was actor C.

Thomas Howell, because He was doing a bit of a fight. He was like, when he pulled over and he's in the car, like, I want you to stop me. And that's why he kept chasing him was because he's the only one that he thought could do it. And he figured if he kept giving him reason enough, he would fucking do it. Yeah, because everybody else, you notice that he picked up, he killed them all.

Yeah. Easily. Yeah. But then, like you said, he put up a fight. He kicked him out of the car.

He's like, I don't want to die! He kicked him out of the car. Between crying gasps. Yeah. I don't want to die!

Was he girl slapping him? Get off me! Pretty much. Yeah. But even the chance at the very end, before he, you know, we already spoiled it, pulled a golden girl in half, he's like, I want you to put the gun into my head and kill me, you know?

And that's when he's like, when he couldn't do it, he's like, oh, my God, you are useless. Yeah. We've all thought that about C. Thomas Howell at one point. I think he thinks that about himself, even.

I'm so useless. Yeah. Arthur Hauer. God, when's he going to do conventions? I don't know.

He needs to. Before he dies. God, I love Ricker Howard. But yeah, the only other thing I watched, I can only stomach part of it. It's like, Sean Patrick Flannery, I love you dearly, but Young and the Restless.

There's only so much I can tolerate. It's like five minute intervals. Is that the Young and the Restless now? Yes! There's an example of people working backwards.

I only caught part of it. I was flipping through and there he was in a barn. Being hot. Whatever. Or some girl, I'm assuming she ran away because she's hiding out in his barn.

He gives her a laptop because he's nice. Hey, I want a free laptop. He gave her a laptop so that she could check her Facebook page. Ah, plug. Yeah, whatever.

This whole thing is sponsored by Facebook. Yeah, apparently she's pretending to be dead, and it's people going, God, what a bitch. I'm glad she died. Were they really saying that? Nice.

Not quite in those exact same words. That's awesome. But anyway, so yeah, Sean Patrick Flannery. I tried. For you, I tried to watch a soap opera, and I failed epically.

I just hate the format of some of it. Just the way that it's structured, the annoying cutting back and forth, the dragging a scene out for three weeks that could be done in two minutes. I was excited there were faces that were even more plastic than his. Yeah. It's like a fight talking about fighting for four hours.

The creepy guy with the black hair. I used to get so mad. Next week on Dragon Ball Z. I was like, no, you're going to be fucking cheating me. But yeah, Sean Patrick Flanagan, Young and the Restless.

I tried. I tried. I did. Truly, I did. But then Boyfriend came in and he's like, he was trying to talk to me and he's like, I can't talk to you.

I can't talk to you with this going on in the background. I'm distracted by soap opera. So he turned it down like, alright, but you're only talking to Sean Patrick Flannery. She was like, stop it! Turn it back up!

You're just having a serious conversation telling me something. And I'm just like, alright, shh. Sean Patrick Flannery's back on. Sean Patrick Flannery! My stories!

My stories! You'll get so hooked by the rest of that show. I know. Luckily, they started a different, maybe it was a One Life to Live. It was on the Soap Opera channel.

They had a whole channel. They had a marathon coming up, something else. If I had started The Young and the Restless Marathon at the beginning, who knows where I'd be now? Probably in there watching the. I grew up with soap operas.

It was my mom. My mom, I'd get home from school, she'd be watching soap operas, and I would come to talk to her, and she would be like, Go outside! I'm watching TV, and I would have to go outside. I'd be outside. They'd basically lock me out of the house.

Nice. And I'd be outside all damn day until the soap opera's over with because she'd be on the phone with all the other women in the neighborhood. Because this is the way it was back in the 80s. They were all watching. Oh, my God, he did what?

Oh, I didn't even know that. Oh, he's got his shirt off. So as kids, we all kind of got together. The anti-self coalitions? Yeah, well, all of our moms kicked us out of the house, you know, because it was soap opera time.

But they were all on the phone, at least until the dads got home. They had to hang up real quick. This was before they had internet. Before they had internet. There was no chat rooms then.

No, back when all the phone numbers were four digits. Wow. You know, you only had a dial. You had a 10K on a string. That happened?

Really? Yeah. Phone numbers used to only. Be four digits? In our area of town, phone numbers were four digits.

And they all had cords, too. I remember the rotary dial. Yeah, ours was 9417. My friend's was 6880. My other friend's was 9682.

At least we didn't have that here. I've always had a regular number. But I guess, yeah, depending on the smaller area. When you were out in the middle of nowhere, you had a four-digit phone number. You just needed a prefix.

You didn't need a prefix. I wonder if there's just going to be so many numbers that they're going to start being eight digits and then nine digits. It'd be funny. With cell phone numbers, possibly. I don't know.

We'll just start making the area code necessary. We'll just make new numbers. I mean, we've already ended up with the area code. You already had the 10 digits right there. The number between 10 and 11.

Yeah. G11. G11. We're just going to start melding things together. How do you write that?

Yeah. But yeah, it's all the things we watched. I myself went to an... Well, me and my mom. I'm not going to go by myself.

I'm not that big of a dork. Me and my mom went to an Elvis impersonators contest. That was pretty exciting. I got hit on by an Elvis impersonator. Sweet.

That was pretty awesome. So if I'm ever single... You better watch out. He called me mean. He told me how old he was.

And I'm like, wow, you know, you're only 10 years younger than my mother. And he was like, well, that's just mean. So he was really nice. So he's going to make me dinner if I'm ever single. Because he was like, I can cook.

And my mom was like, yeah, I can tell. Oh, my God. It's so funny that you get all of your, like, your wit and your charm from your mother. Is that what we're calling it now? Air quotes there.

There's other words for that. That's awesome. I would have loved it if it was there, but I was like, I can tell. But yes, I got hit on in an Elvis impersonator contest. That's the end of my stories.

Did I mention, I think I forgot to mention, did I mention I was dressed up like a female version of Pee Wee? I don't think you did, actually. She was. No one really got it. I did, but you told me it beforehand.

Yeah. I was expecting it. Do you have a red bow tie? I did. I mean, I kind of feel like that's all you need.

Gray, white shirt, gray pants, gray jacket. After the fact, after I realized that I was like, oh, yeah, that's pretty good. White shoes. I didn't pay it. But you were the girl version of Pee Wee.

I was the girl version of Pee Wee. There was another girl who was dressed as Pee Wee. Really? She was wearing a suit. She looked like a guy.

So you had a very different variation. I kind of liked yours because you were trying to do something different with it, but yet still going with the same theme. Yeah. Well, now it's your turn for Geek Week. Do you have anything?

Unless you have anything outstanding. Um. No, I don't know if anyone has, I kind of wanted to talk about this because I was trying to watch it and I fell asleep, but I didn't know if anyone has heard of it because I'm kind of excited about it, and I was thinking maybe this might be a good movie for the podcast sometime. It's called Mic Max. It's directed by Jeunet, the same guy that did City of Lost Children.

I've heard about it. It's not like the double team, you know, that did City of Lost Children. of Lost Children and. Delicatessen, but I don't think they work together anymore. I know. But, uh, yeah, um, visually, like, the first ten minutes that I caught before I, like, passed out, I didn't, like, pass out.

I fell asleep. I put it on. I put movies on while I'm laying in bed to fall asleep to, so. Naturally, I fell asleep to this. That's a pretty good thing to do.

It was, like, amazing visually so far. I didn't know if you guys would be interested in that sometime. I know it got a long, long, long wish. But I think mainly just because it's hard for me to read it on my computer. And stay awake during movies?

And, like, see it from, like, my bed and read it comfortably. And, like, it would be nice to watch on a real TV, so. We can throw it on the list. We do it on the show, so I can actually watch it. Most people that are on the show should just fall asleep.

Unless it's all movies. Yeah, you fell asleep last night. I did. I did. I was so excited.

I was mad. Jessica was like, I don't think I'm going to go back. I'm just going to hang out here. And I'm like, I was like, I've been waiting for this All my life. And then I fell asleep.

She was like, how was the movie? I was like, I slept through a lot of it. You'll never know how it turns out. Yeah, no, I'm kidding. Hey, I caught the beginning and some of the middle and the end.

And I've seen it like a hundred times. And we got free hot dogs. That's true. That weren't cooked all the way through. These hot dogs are.

Perfectly fully cooked. They were fully cooked, yeah. They were so cold in the middle. Mine was, so. It's hard.

Well, that grill didn't have fire on it, so he was working at a disadvantage. The grill didn't have fire? It was like an electric grill, so not quite so light. It just had an outlet. It was a 40-watt bulb.

It's red to make you think it's hot. Wow, that's amazing. That's all you need. All right, does that round out the Geek Week? Yeah.

All right. We will take a break. Be back with What's the Buzz? You know just what the right things are to do Your actions move me But your attitude, it makes me so confused You lead me on in the right direction And you lay me down for the protection. Ain't gonna mean your sacrifice Just.

A few words, it might sound nice It ain't. No use in playing games I'm wanting you, do you feel the same? When it comes down to the bottom line I really gotta know I'm wasting. Time If you want my love, say it, say it Now, darling, yeah You gotta let it out. Say it, say it Yeah.

Visit us often and enjoy our screen attractions in the comfort of your own car. Tweaked Audio, your source for high-performance, noise-reducing earbuds. Available in three styles and seven colors, durable and designed to sound great for both music and those chatty podcasts, like the one you're listening to now. Tweaked Audio earbuds come with a one-year warranty, and now there's a special deal for Movie Meltdown listeners. Just go to tweakedaudio.com, and when you check out, enter the discount code MELTDOWN.

Then you'll get 33% off and free shipping. Tweaked Audio. Sounds better. You'll be glad to know that we provide bottle warming service at refreshment stands. Choosing a family movie is tough.

It seems like all Hollywood can do is make mindless drivel that rots kids' brains. Who wants to see a movie like. What my dad watched when he was a kid. Those films are so boring and the special effects are horrible. The movies he grew up with are.

Sometimes a big surprise. I at times feel uncomfortable watching movies I loved when I was younger with my own kids because I forgot how much cursing, sex, and violence they showed back then. All we want to do is watch a fun movie that we all like. That's why we created Family Movie Night, a podcast where we review movies from an adult perspective. And from a kid's perspective.

So you can find movies for your whole family to enjoy. We review new movies. Old childhood favorites. Cult and foreign films. And Godzilla.

So check out Family Movie Night on the web at fmnpodcast.com. Or find us on iTunes. Bye. We are family. We are family.

Hello, this is Sonny Landon. Welcoming you to Movie Meltdown. This is a chopper! It's part of your problem, you know. You haven't seen enough movies.

All of life's riddles are answered in the movies. And now, on with the show. Ever since the day I met you. I knew that you were the one for me. I knew you had me shaking all over You stir me up now can't you.

See Oh, shake it up I forgot to say. That I spent- I sat and watched all of Sean Patrick Flannery's twit videos. And he's the biggest dork in the entire world, and I'm so... His what video? Twit video.

That's for Twitter. Did you see the video of him? I guess it's his sister's cat, I guess. Oh, my God. I watched...

Yeah, you sent a couple to me, and I... He's such a dork. And the dog, him and the donut. His dog's name's Donut. You get to watch it.

His dog's slightly trained, but he still doesn't really listen to him that much. But he still feels the need to shoot videos of him doing quote-unquote tricks. All right. Buzz. We're back with What's the Buzz?

So, yeah, this one I had to throw out there just to see what your take on it was. As of this week. The rights to the fifth movie in the Terminator franchise were shopped around the studios with Arnold Schwarzenegger attached to star. Who fucking cares anymore? It's going to take place in an old folks home.

Yeah, I was like, really? I didn't see the last movie. Maybe this one's going to be he takes down the world by destroying the. Economy of California. Word.

Well, he's getting out of that. That's why he can make all these movies. I think he just learned to fight the system from the inside. That's what it should be about. So is he going to be the hero or villain in this?

No telling. He has to be the hero. I'm sure. That's the thing. Maybe it'll be a twist if he's the villain.

Maybe they'll get some M. Night Shyamalan shit up in there. That was the awesome thing about the second one is they found something new to do with it. Granted, that's really the last time we've done anything useful with the series, but I don't know. I still haven't watched the fourth one, so.

I didn't see the third one. There was a fourth one? Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's right. There was a fourth one.

I forgot all about that. That shit crazy rant. Come on. Oh, yeah. The third one really disappointed me.

It's just, there's nothing to it. I just kind of quit watching it after the second one. The second one was good. The second one's great, but, I mean, the third one's just a rehash of the second one only with some different actors. I mean, it's...

It's. Hannah Loken and her thinking she can get more fucking money than she's worth. Fuck her. Who? Christiana Lohan.

I'm saying her name all wrong. I don't know what the fuck her name is. The blonde chick who was at the convention who was charging more than everybody else and nobody knew who the fuck she was. That's really the only difference is, well, let's make a girl Terminator. Like, that was the...

Oh my god! That's what got it approved at the table there. Next it's gonna be a kid Terminator. Yeah, I know. It's just...

Baby Terminator. It's gonna be one of the fanning sisters. Ooh, that could be interesting. It could be a girl and a kid. That could be interesting.

Well, they... That's the thing. It's like how... Mostly I wanted to address, aside from the fact that, number one, are they going to explain the fact that this machine is now a 63-year-old man? Like, why is a machine aging?

Are they going to explain... CG! CG. They will CG his wrinkles away. Guess they will.

What's his face in Tron? Yeah. I hated that. That scared me so bad. Retroactively Jeff Bridges-ing.

I just think. I still don't, I mean, the whole time travel thing, looping and looping, and people, just send somebody back really fucking early and blow the shit out of everybody. It should have been over a long time ago. That was my other point, and that was probably the bigger one, aside from, okay, it's Hollywood, we're going to skate by the fact that he's getting older. This happens in series all the time, and they just don't address it, because people know the star, they don't care.

But, I mean. at what point If, in fact, this time travel universe were real, would this universe fucking collapse on itself? Because all the shit they keep going back. They've looped back around so many times. Especially if you factor in the TV series, which not everybody likes, but I've heard pretty interesting. I only saw a couple episodes, but I heard they actually follow through with a pretty... straightforward storyline of the time arc in the TV series.

So if you factor that into this universe of five movies, a season, something of a TV series, and now, you know, moving on into more movies down the line, It's like they've messed things up so many times, looped back around, brought the same people back in for different situations, keep sending robots back and I'm just like... Nobody listens to Doc Brown. How? Yeah, really? Don't they have a chalkboard in that universe?

Can't they explain how things are going to get fucked up? No. Oh, I don't know. I'm just like, this universe would have shut down about Terminator 3, I'm pretty sure, so... That's the part that becomes, if you want to go unbelievable, I mean, not that I'm buying most of this.

You know, it's science fiction. I know that, but still. Even for science fiction, there needs to be some sort of basis in reality, and I think we're surpassing that. Again, the loop of John Connor ever even existing breaks in the first one. Yeah.

You can't have that. You can't have the guy that's sent back to help him be the father. Spoiler alert. From that point on, it changes everything from that point on. Yeah, if he hadn't gone back in time, how would he have ever even existed to facilitate the resistance?

It's like, what the fuck? Why don't you shove your timeline continuum up your anus? Forcibly insert it, sorry. Okay. What is that from?

She told me, unfortunately, I'm sorry, my timeline continued. I'm on my anus. I forgot. What was that from? I just told you this yesterday.

You know I don't remember anything. Donnie Darko. Donnie Darko. Thank you. Oh, that's right.

Oh, it's no S. Darko. That would be suck. Yeah, does that stand for suck? Sucky Darko?

The thing that's probably not going to save this next Terminator movie, director has chosen to be Justin Lin. who would be the director of the last three Fast and Furious movies. Oh, it would be awesome to have Vin Diesel in it. Vin Diesel can be a Terminator. Hell yeah, I'd buy him as a Terminator. He'd come back as a combination of Riddick Terminator.

I saw a video online. He used to do instructional videos for brick dancing. Vin Diesel. Wow. I saw some of them.

Now, I'll give Justin Lim credit. Ever since I saw that trailer, and we said this last night, I was like, all right, we should have skipped The Earnest and gone to watch Fast Five, because that looks entertaining. I'm not going to say it's not dumb, and I haven't watched the last three in the series, but Fast Five looks pretty damn entertaining. And it's mostly The Rock. The Rock looks pretty...

He's so fun. You've got to love The Rock. I do. And he's freaking huge now. What the hell?

He's bigger than when he was wrestling. What has happened to that man? He's giant. He's one of the few that's made a successful crossover into acting. He very soon can just be Dwayne Johnson.

Well, he kind of is. I mean, I don't think he can use The Rock anymore, but people still refer to him as The Rock. So, yeah, he's definitely crossed over and is way more talented than anybody ever saw coming. I like him because he doesn't take himself too damn seriously. My mom has a crush on him.

And he's fucking funny. He does. He does have a really good sense of... And I still like Southland Tales. Screw you all.

I didn't dislike it. Everybody talks shit about that movie. I have issues with it. I'm not going to say it's totally bad. It's a mess, but there's so much good in it, you can't say it's bad.

I will fully acknowledge it's a mess. It's a fucking train wreck, but it's a fun train wreck. It's like, yay! It's like a clown car of train wrecks. It's definitely got its moments of fun.

And it's moments of, what? Stifler. We're not going to talk about that. That's a whole other issue. So, yeah, I don't know.

So, yeah, sidetrack. You know, talking. About bringing back sequels of stuff and having people being old and coming back and trying to work them in, how are they going to do this with Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure? Because you know Keanu Reeves and Alex Winters are old as the fucking hills. Old.

Yeah. Are they playing, like, retirement homes? Yeah. That's what I said before when they brought that up. I was just like, well, we've seen...

Are they going to be passing the baton to a new Bill and Ted? We've seen the future, so unless they do a Terminator and fuck up the past somehow, the future should be perfect. Yeah. So if they're playing it now, it would be the perfect future. So unless they're just sitting around strumming their hands in a circle...

That's the only thing that happens in the future. Maybe it's the future and something fucks up that future. And they're going to have to go even more into the past. George Carlin Dine. Fucked up their future.

Yeah, you know, that's the thing that's going to kill it for me is there's no Carlin in it. It's your kids, Ted. You've got to do something about your kids. So, yeah, maybe they go forward into the future. I don't know.

There's CG Carlin. They could bring them back. Oh, God. I thought they said they were not going to write Carlin into it. So I prefer that, really.

I'm going to see it because I saw Bill and Ted's. I actually got to see it before it came out in theaters because my friend's dad worked at a movie theater. and we got to pre-screen it, which was cool. And I've always been a fan of that, just because of the stupidity of it. Well, and again, it's kind of like the peewee thing. It's kind of dumbed down for some of the jokes, and then some of the stuff is really smart.

But, dude, that was me growing up. I was a complete loser, slacker, you know, whoa, nobody likes us, you know, kind of deal. Going to get sent to military school. Exactly. Well, actually, I begged my dad to send me to military school, and he wouldn't.

That's a spinster! Or the military. No, he didn't want me to have anything to do with the military. Because he was. Yeah, he was.

It's usually either or. They're pushing towards it. Yeah, it's usually the other way around. You're going to have nothing to do with it. So, yeah.

Skateboarding, punk rock, and girls ruined the military for me. And flat feet. And flat feet. They don't give a fuck anymore. Hell, they'll take people with neck tattoos now.

You're legally blind. Well, they don't care about that either. So, they'll give me a pair of BCDs and send me on my way. So. But yeah, Bill and Ted is one of the very few movies that I can tolerate Keanu Reeves in.

He's got his moments. I mean, we've watched River's Edge. He's good. He's good in The Gift. I mean, I'm trying to think.

Oh, again, Parenthood. I think he does. It's one shade away from Ted, but again, it shows he can. Johnny Mnemonic. Oh, maybe I'm alone on this one.

Wait, you're on the wrong side of the book. Yeah, he's been trying. He's like, dude, we have to watch Honey Mnemonic. I'm like, no. Come on.

Why not? It's got Henry Rollins and Dolph Lundgren in it. Dolph Lundgren. I would watch it for the show. I'm not going to say I'm going to like it, but I would watch it because we would have a lot to say about that one.

Oh, we would have so much to say about it. Oh, but yeah. Sad track. Several times over. But yeah, the Terminator thing, they said they're...

Oh, that's what we were talking about. Yeah, 14 times ago when we switched gears. We've got to sort of jump back in the time continuum. One of the other sources said they're actually considering reuniting the original cast. So, like, bring him back Linda Hamilton?

Are you going to, like, time warp in Michael Biehn? Bring him back Edward Furlong's loaded ass? I haven't seen Edward Furlong. Again, but that's not the original cast. So that would leave out, there's no kid then.

They keep working in John in the new movies, but if they go original cast, you don't have to worry about John. I would think at that point you'd need James Cameron and then it would be... Which I don't think he wants anything to do with it anymore. Why not? He can do anything he wants to.

That's what I'm saying. I mean, as much as he improved on himself the first time... Possibly the third one and the fourth one tainted it for him. He just doesn't want to have any... Yeah, I mean, he didn't...

I mean, he worked himself out of the third one. I think he still, like, listed his, like, story and, you know... The basic producer stuff that I guess he has to sign off on. One of those things, if it gets taken by somebody else, and you're just sitting there going, dude, they fucking ruined this. I made two fucking awesome movies, and you just fucking ruined it.

Fuck you. I don't want to have anything to do with that. Well, maybe, but if he could come back in and wipe the slate clean and say, don't even watch those other two. Literally time warp and take those out of the picture. Possibly, yeah.

Pull a Star Trek and say, fuck those other two. Exactly. You can do that with this timeline. Yeah. And the Romulans are going to come in and fuck up Terminator shit.

They should do that. Damn Romulans. That would be cool. I think they need to make a movie that's like every sci-fi movie, like a legit movie and not a parody, that's like every sci-fi movie, like Crossing. Battle Royale.

I always wanted like 2010 to actually be Hal comes back and fucks shit up. He's like, y'all shut me down. Do you know how much of a nerd-fest argument that would start? Oh, yeah. I mean, it still does.

The internet would kick the alien's ass. Uh-uh, Luke Skywalker would come in with a lightsaber. The internet would break. No, the fucking Klingons would... I'm pretty sure that's what the internet was invented for, was to have those arguments.

It would just break. The internet would break. Would you just tuck your phone into your bra? That's kind of where I keep it. Yeah, she keeps stuff there.

It's kind of like a. Can of dip. It's like a cigarette girl. So she's going to have the dip ring. She's going to have a little rectangle.

I'm sorry. That just caught me off guard. She has to wear a jean blouse. She can definitely feel it vibrate up there. Yeah, it did.

It just vibrated. That's what we can see. That's where I put it when I'm at the gym. I tuck it underneath my. Sports bra strap.

You're missing the working out hand motions. When you're promoting this episode, you're going to have to talk about it. Vibrating female chest because it's going to sell the show right there. Are you doing the elliptical machine or is that the stair stepper? It's a combination of, it's this really cool machine that's like you can run on it and And it's also like an elliptical machine.

It also stares. It's like three in one. Is it like a glider? I've got one underneath the bed. It's got a lot of things all over it.

It is a glider, but it also stares. You don't have to go to the gym. Gazelle. Tony Little approves. I love the gazelle.

Don't you hate having to get on three separate machines? Exactly. Well, now. I need one that says, don't you hate exercise equipment underneath your bed? Yeah, exactly.

That's what ours is. I can move the shotgun. It's taking up space. I mean, but seriously, though, I've been going to the gym for, like, the last every day, or not every day, but, like, four days a week for the last three weeks, and, like, my legs, like, the tone in my legs has, it's just, like, 50% improvement. I need to go to the gym.

I've got big old thundersides. I mean, my legs are still big, but they're, like, really toned now, like... They've always been really muscular. Cory needs to keep in shape. I don't want him to, like, go soft.

Like, saggy Cory. He's gonna get all puffy, like, in life. He'll come back up after a while. That's true. Some of that might have been drugs, but...

You're just gonna have to start injecting. Your leg with heroin right there. He was clean. Towards the end, he was clean. Yeah.

Mostly. He totally was. Dude. All right, what were we talking about again? Oh, let's move on before something horrible happens.

Now, this one we brought up in the past, but I wanted to see what you thought of their new finalized main casting. We talked a long time ago about them trying to put together a Lone Ranger movie. And Tonto has been set for well over a year now as Johnny Depp. But it's like, okay, how do you balance out that duo? That is such a...

I just think a slap in the face Johnny Depp should not be. But they're saying it's... Well, wait. A slap in the face to Johnny Depp or to Native Americans? To Native Americans.

Well, he is part Cherokee. He's a quarter Cherokee. So, I mean, that's pretty minimal. Everybody calls themselves a quarter Cherokee. Yeah, I do too.

Is he the only semi-Native American actor we have in America? Yes. Yes, we do. What happened to Lou Diamond Phillips? Is he even?

I thought he was partial, too. He always plays. He always plays. Dude, fucking get Steven Seagal. Steven Seagal played an Indian in fucking some other movie.

He couldn't get on a horse. All right. Punch a horse in the throat. He can't lift his leg that high to get on a horse. He's like Mongo now.

He punches ass horses. Steven Seagal. Ate the horse. There's got to be a more Native American. You would think.

What about that. Guy from the Twilight movies. What about Sharkboy? Isn't he Native American? Yeah, that's true.

What about him? I'm signing off to say... See, but I was thinking that. I knew that one. I was thinking Johnny Depp's pretty old now, but then I was like, wasn't Tonto quite a bit older than the Lone Ranger on the show?

So I was like, maybe they're just trying to match up and, I don't know, Graham Greene's way too old. I don't know. What is Sonny Landon? Has he got Nandy and him on him to do it? I believe he is.

No, I don't know if he is, actually. I think he played it very well, but I think when I looked up, you know, when I was doing research when we talked to him, I don't know that he's even Native American. I think he was just playing. I just want him to do it so I can hear him do that laugh. That laugh is awesome.

Danny Trejo's played a lot of Native Americans. That's true. He plays several options. He's good with a knife. Or a machete.

Have we seen him use a bow and arrow? I don't know. That would be cool. That would be awesome. I'm sure he can.

If not, we'll train him. Would he get on a horse, though? Just as long as it's not Shia LaBeouf. Why would he be an Indian? Don't cast him in anything at this point.

Alright, who's going to play the Lone Ranger? The Lone Ranger. It's not going to be Seth Rogen. I'm not even sure. I don't think you've even seen this.

Greg, I know you've seen it. It's someone from the social network. Do you remember the Winklevoss twins? Oh, yeah, the big guy. The big blonde dude's Armie Hammer.

That's a fucking awesome name right there. It is an awesome name. The awesomest name I've ever heard. He should be a wrestler. I don't know about this acting career.

Is that his real name? Armie Hammer. Armie Hammer. That's awesome. So he is supposedly supposed to take on the role of the...

Which, again, they're getting a pretty boy, but then they're going to cover his face most of the movie. What the hell is that? You might as well just get an ugly actor if you're going to cover his face. The whole movie. So they could put Shia LaBeouf in there.

There you go. I don't know what the hat hit fit on his head. It'll just stick up on his hair. His crazy hair. Isn't the world really needing a loan?

That's the other one I was going to ask. The same question I ask about all these reboots and updates. Is this generation going to care about a loan? Exactly. I mean, when I was a kid, Yeah, I still played Cowboys and Indians growing up.

Yeah. But even then, it was already dated. Yeah, even then, we were moving on into World War II. It was like, yeah, it was like what my dad saw when he was a kid, you know? So it's like, even by our generation, it was like, oh.

I was busy playing, you know, D-Day and shit. My one dumb neighbor, he was always a Nazi, so we hated him. You're the Nazi. Yeah. How come I always have to be the Nazi?

Shut up. We're going to shoot you now. Bastards! So, yeah, I just don't know if there's a... I mean, how will it go over?

Is it going to be another one of those that gets a lot of... Slapsticky bullshit? Well, that or... I don't think so. Is there going to be a talking horse?

That's the thing. I didn't know who was doing it. It's... Gore Bavinsky is directing, which, I mean, he's done the Pirates of the Caribbean movies. Like, he's got a really good visual style.

I mean, he... At least the first one of that series, he can deliver a fun, action-oriented movie. So I'm just like, It could go well, but I'm just like, I don't know if anybody's going to care. Like, is it going to find that market? Is there that?

I mean, Pirates may either come back. Maybe there is a cowboy market that could come back in that. Possibly. I don't know. I mean, it came out with, what's coming out now?

Cowboys vs. Aliens. Cowboys vs. Aliens. Yeah, I mean.

That's going to be good, I think. I'm excited about it. Yeah. I'm still waiting for the Cowboys and Ninjas movie. Did it already come out?

Did I miss it? What's the one that's out there? Robots and Ninjas? Robot vs. Ninja.

Yeah, that's on Netflix. I keep going, man, I think I need a lot of that. No, Ninja vs. Alien. We've watched the trailer.

That's the one. No, I'm talking about the Cowboy and Ninja movie. The one where the guy comes from, he's trying to escape the Ninja clan, and he comes over to the United States, and he's working, and there's a bunch of cowboys in it. Yeah, I remember that. Shanghai Nuge.

Yeah, that was awesome. But it's kind of like, the thing looks awesome. It looks really good, but then I Somehow it fell off my radar, and I don't know if it ever came out. Does anybody know? If anybody knows, please say something.

Yeah, we'll have to check into it. We don't have either. We'll add it to the end. We do. We're too damn lazy.

We're too damn lazy. We'll just get sidetracked. Right. What was it? Don't you hate trying to look stuff up on Google?

God, it's such a hassle. Google Master 5000. Yeah. For Ronco. So a pad of paper and a pen for people to write down their ideas.

It's specifically for Google. Don't you hate when you mean to Google something, but you've got to wait until you get home to Google it, so. here's a patent paper write that shit down $ 20 for a patent paper if you act now we'll throw in another patent paper sponsored by 3M so yeah I don't know that was just one that they finalized the casting I was just like well I guess I mean he didn't seem like a terrible actor so Who knows? It's one of those movies that will just be, it'll come out, and if it's good, yeah, we might watch it. I just don't know that it's going to be huge. There's so many that are big budget studio pictures at this point that just kind of float by, and they might open at $ 20 million, and then they go straight to DVD.

It feels like it might be one of those, another one of those that gets a huge push, but doesn't necessarily find a super audience that gets behind it. If they make it a summer blockbuster, and then roll... Halloween costumes into it a few months. Later that might hit big. Maybe.

I think that's what the kind of pirates think. Everybody went as a pirate for Halloween. But then again, you know, you've got to think about it. You've got the Lone Ranger and you've got his cowboys. Like you said, Brian, who's going to really care at this point?

What's the villain going to be? How are you going to outdo cowboys? They don't have superpowers. Yeah. They're not going to be fighting aliens.

Who are they going to fight? They can't fight the Indians. They can't fight the Mexicans. It's just a bad guy and a black cat. It's going to be a mustache twirler.

It'll have to be the system. It'll be the oil man. What's it going to be? Giant spiders. Trying to run the railroad through and they're screwing people over and working people from China.

Irish people. We've got to save all the some rancher. It's not going to be, yeah, it's going to be totally PC. Yeah. Unless they have to fight the burrowers, which that would be awesome.

No, hey, no, I would watch that movie. That would be cool. The Lone Razor versus the burrowers. Yeah. I'm going to have to get hold of JT.

Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house.

Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house.

Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house.

Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house.

Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house.

Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house.

Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house. Burrow house.

Burrow house All right, so the only other one that was sort of interesting this time out, they said, Universal Pictures is in talks with Jeff Bridges to join the supernatural comedy R.I.P.D. based on the comic book series of the same name published by Dark Horse since 1999, which I looked up. It looks kind of interesting. I hadn't really seen much on it, but no surprise who the star is. He's the star of every movie. Seth Rogen?

Ryan Reynolds has been attached to Star for over a year now. But again, I like this idea if they don't screw it up. Is he going to have his shirt off? Probably most of the movies. As long as they don't cover it up with bad green CGI.

Yeah. So, in this one, Reynolds will be playing a modern cop who is brought back from the dead to work with a special police force of undead detectives who investigate crimes involving monsters and the supernatural. Robocop? Kind of. Spooky Robocop.

That's like Robocop becomes a zombie. Yeah. Or. Zombie Cop. Dead Heat?

Let's watch Dead Heat. That's already sort of on my list. We need to watch Dead Heat. But... Yeah, I don't know.

How many graphic novel and comic book movies are we going to get? Especially the obscure ones. At what point will we run out? They're going to tap into every single one. They're never going to run out.

Yeah, I mean, there's so many indie little labels. Yeah, come on. It just goes to show. Because we're going to have to pull from this pool of stuff and just make a movie out of it. I don't know if it's like creativity.

I think it's more of the fact that everybody's like, holy shit, let's cash in on it. Come on, let's cash in on it. And then everybody's wanting to cash. In on it. I think it works both.

And I think in a way it can work to our advantage. I think number one, it's the studios being lazy and wanting only things that are proven properties. They only want sequels. They only want reboots. They only want comic book movies.

But on the other hand, the people that are doing these little independent comics are actually usually kind of talented. So if you're looking for original ideas and talent, I would probably trust them going with somebody who spent years working on their own independent comic story than a bunch of hacks piecing together 20 writers slapping together some studio craft screenplay. I'd much rather them, like, especially, like, support that independent comic scene and give these guys who are doing it out of their basement, you know, give them a couple million bucks and be like, you know, here, granted, half the time they probably ruined their project, which sucks, but the other times you get The Walking Dead, you know?

I mean, that was a comic that not that many people knew. It had its following, but, like, mainstream, most people probably had no idea what that was when they turned it into a series. So it's like you get stuff like that that's getting picked up now. Or, like, The Goon. That's the one I'm thinking of.

Have you seen the trailer for The Goon? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God, that looks good. And it's, yeah, The Goon. Like Popeye?

Well, the one guy looks a lot like Popeye, but no, it's the independent comic, and it's kind of the same storyline. It's about, like, these guys in this town that's overrun with all these, like, monsters and zombies and all this stuff, and there's Two of them, and they take it upon themselves to go kick ass. They're doing it as an animated project. Everybody involved is top-notch. That is another one.

Thank God they found an original property and they gave it to talented people. Based on the trailer, it still looks good. I still have such high hopes for that one. That's another one of these ideas. I would much rather them do stuff like that.

If they can sucker Jeff Bridges into it, I mean, that's a huge name, especially in the last couple years. Yeah, Oscar winner, I mean, you know, a couple of big movies. It's like, that would be kind of interesting. Jeff Bridges is supposed to be playing Reynolds' partner, who is an old West gunslinger, again, tying into the cowboy theme, who's been on the job for over 100 years. That's, again, he could do it, like watching him in, you know, True Grit.

He could tap into something and do a really good performance there. Maybe that is one of those things, you know? If Hollywood starts bringing back cowboy stuff, then everybody's like, oh, that must. Be cool now. They try.

I mean, every couple years, they keep trying to get another little push. There'll be, like, one big one in the theater, there'll be one or two that go straight to DVD, and, like, it never really catches on. It's like. I think it just, you know, everything goes in cycles. You know, like, ninjas are the new pirates, and then zombies.

But I don't think cowboys really haven't fully caught on since they were, you know, granddads thought they were cool. But, I mean, even, like, The Closest was probably unforgiven. You know, that put it in the mainstream, giving it an Oscar. That was, but it was pretty unconventional as westerns go anyway. So, I mean, it's like, it seems like it never fully came back, but.

It could. Again, if they push it, if they, you know, Pirates of the Caribbean it up, I mean, it could definitely come back around. They just haven't had cowboys, though. They had Jonah Hex. That was kind of cowboys.

Again, they tried. Yeah, I think they just haven't had a good movie. That was a lot more Wild Wild West than it was. A lot more Megan Fox and her stupid-ass thumbs. Yeah, that was not quite a legitimate try.

I mean, like, there's some really popular kind of, like, cowboy type. video games and things like that. There are people that are into it. I just don't think it's been like mainstream. There's like Red Dead Redemption that I can't say. Really fast, three times.

Red Dead Redemption. Yeah. They got them fighting zombies in that one too. I was confused. I was watching my friend Ben play it, and I was like, where are all the zombies?

And he was like, that's a different game. No, every game has zombies, Sean. Well, there's the undead one or whatever. The undead redemption. Yeah, but I was just confused because I'm like, Where are all the zombies?

He's like, this is not a game about zombies. Well, I know it could be. Every time I come over, I'm. Like, where are the zombies? He's like, how many times do I have to tell you this is not a zombie game?

Even games that aren't zombie games have new codes that you can unlock. Like, what was the war one? Was it Call of Duty? Or one of those had a code that you crack a specific level, and it's a zombie level. You know, I'm sorry, but Nazi zombies can't go wrong.

You can never go wrong with fucking Nazi zombies. In video games, in movies. Steam-powered zombies. There you go. I don't give a fuck.

They're powered by Jell-O pudding. That was my favorite. No, that was a good part of the movie. That was probably my favorite little venture into the story. Not only are they evil, but they are damn tasty.

This episode is sponsored by Jell-O pudding. Please send our check now. Only if it's butterscotch. I don't know their ice cream. They have that ice cream sandwich.

Speaking of pudding, that thing has some chocolate pudding in my car. Already made just sitting on the seat. It's a little snack pack, people. Come on. I just don't keep a bowl of pudding in my car.

That's not what I hear. Man, I bet she's got a bowl of pudding. In her car. Is that euphemism? Start using that, people.

Work that in as much as possible. Girl, girl, I like your pudding. Have you ever seen the state $ 240 worth of pudding? Oh, yeah. Barry and LeVar.

Oh, yeah. $ 240 worth of pudding. Oh, yeah. My name is Barry Sagittarius. I love those guys. I know.

All right. I think that was it for the buzz. Anything you need to pass along in this week's news? Any other? I don't know.

Alright, we shall wrap up then. Okay, kids, get out your decoder pins. I can tell that tonight's message was really important. Come on. You didn't even hear the noise.

There you go. Pulling the things up. It's time for the movie meltdown secret circle movie you love next week's exciting feature. Next week we will be back to watch the 80's classic as far as I'm concerned. It's a A defining movie for a generation, if you ask me.

The Last American Virgin. Yeah. I'm interested to see what you guys think of it. And we will have more of our... I'm familiar with the second to the last, but not the last one.

Not the last one. Well, most of the series, but I didn't catch that last one. I saw the first. Well, the original most of the time is the best, but not this time. The third one was kind of a disappointment.

We will again have a prequel before there was a virgin. How do you be before a virgin? I don't know. Pre-virgin. That sounds gross.

We will also feature more of our interview with Diane Franklin, star of The Last American Virgin. God, she was so nice. She is ridiculously nice and cute, and you'll get to see her as a cute young girl in this movie. I'd just like to point out before we close up that Ernest goes to jail and Medea goes to jail and needs a mashup. No, I don't think it does.

Don't silly the fine name of Jim Varney. What does that say? But it's like there's both series that should have died. Yeah. And they both play female characters and a lot of characters within the same movies.

But Ernest was awesome. Yeah. Yeah, but Ernest was never in Star Trek. Here's the other problem. Jim Varney never made a billion dollars.

Right. Jim Varney never got to be the most successful playwright that ever lived. So sad. Fuck Shakespeare. Jim Varney wasn't to Oprah's best friend.

Yeah. That probably helped, too. What? That's sad. Oh, Lord.

Sorry. All right. Let's just play some EG Daily and get the hell out of here. All right. Otherwise, that about does it.

We will return next week. Same geek time, same geek feed. Thanks for listening. Later, y'all. Bye.

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I'm hot tonight I'm. Hot tonight Thank you. I was flying high till you shot me down Were you coming with me when I hit the ground? I'm hot tonight I'm hot tonight I'm hot tonight. I'm hot tonight.

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Whole thing of cherry Pepsi in my car. I just keep my groceries in my car. This show is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced and edited by Brian Renfro, with opening music performed by The Empires. To help support the show, email producer at moviemeltdown.com for ways that you can contribute or advertise with us.