Married to the Toy Lifestyle

Hey guys, it's Greg Nicotero from The Walking Dead. This is Movie Meltdown. The following feature has been rated R by the Motion Picture Association of America. It is intended for mature audiences and parental discretion is advised. It's showtime, folks.

Enjoy the show. Our nuclear reactor pumping out one million kilowatts of power. What's up and. Welcome to Movie Meltdown. I'm Brian.

I'm Misty. And we're coming to you live via digital recording from the outskirts of Wonderfest. Woo! We have returned. We don't even count the years anymore.

I was going to say, how many years? We don't. You usually say how many years, and I'm like, no, it's not, because that became the running. There's two things we opened with every year, and I've tried to kill them because we do it every year. But I made my mom postpone our wedding.

That's where we're going. But first, we usually spend five minutes going, now, what is it? There's 2,000, and we went to the, and so we'll spend. So it's just umpteen, eventually ump20. Is that a thing?

Ump20. Anyway, it's been a long damn time. decades we've been coming to Wonderfest because it's awesome and we are glad to be back. Yeah. It is home. It's a second home of all the conventions.

Like this is the one I'm just so used to. I just ease on in and know where things are unless they change things. Which confuses me. I don't like change. I mean it wasn't their doing.

The hotel got remodeled so now there's like a wall where there wasn't a wall and there's things and people and a difference. But it's very confusing. But other than that you know. I don't like change. They're awesome and all.

Change is part of the reason I'm out of paper. I don't have change or paper bills. Well, because the place that used to have, see, this is another one that used to bring us in. I used to have to go to the health fair. I did ask you before we were setting this up.

I was like, what time do you have a A men's fair, a women's fair, a book fair. There's always some sort of fair you're going to before. You get the Winterfest. Well, the hospital that used to have the men's health fair that I would attend every year to get my paper and pens and clips and all assorted shenanigans. Papers, like you're being stopped by Nazis.

Papers? You're like, I got a free pen too, buddy. I got to make my grocery list on something, dude. I don't go to the grocery, but I need to make the list. I put it in digital, like.

I got a fancy phone app. Jay breaks it down old school style. Pen and paper. He is old school. Yes, he is.

But now we're running out of paper because there wasn't a mental health fair. Because the hospital that had the health fair is now a different hospital. And apparently the new hospital doesn't care about the health fair. I'm guessing they still make paper. Would you be opposed to buying a padded paper?

Oh, that goes against all my religious beliefs. That's what I kind of figured. You are a collector of free things. I love free shit. I don't care what it is.

If it's free, give me that shit. Yes, I'm not surprised by that statement. Change has come this year. And I don't like it. Yeah, what are you going to do?

So we can no longer buy groceries because we can no longer make lists. Because the health fair. As you two starved to death, it's the health fair's fault. It's the hospital's fault for not having the health fair. I mean, sometimes they give things away at that other harvest homecoming.

Maybe you got to wait until the fall. Then I have my free bag and my free cup. It changes colors. Sometimes pins. My pokey stick that I use for texting.

Because I'm an old man. I got to have a pokey stick because I can't hit them old buttons. Last year. Holy shit. The fucking thing happened that I've been waiting my entire life for.

Oh, I think I know where you're going. I got a yardstick. At Harvest Homecoming, right? At the Harvest Homecoming. Okay.

Because you don't get one at the fair. Fuck no. The fair is like, no, you don't get a damn yardstick. Other people were. Walking around with them.

So somewhere somebody's giving one out, but they won't give one to you. They won't. Do I look untrustworthy with a yardstick? Kind of. I feel like you'd be smacking passersby.

I would. I just would. That's why they won't give you one. Yeah, but last year, Harvest Homecoming, props. You gave me a fucking yardstick.

And now I have fulfilled my old lady destiny. I have a yardstick. I do my cross stitch. I am set for life. I mean, it's old just because you're calling it a yardstick.

If we were cool and fancy, it'd be a meter stick. Fuck that. We're weird old America. I'm American. We do things wrong.

No, we do it right. We want the square one. We don't want things that are even and make sense. The whole rest. Of the world does shit wrong.

America, fucking hell. I mean, metric makes sense. I've said that from day one. As soon as they explained it to me, I was like, oh, well, that is a better system. You know what?

And then I was like, but I'm not going to learn things. I'll figure out a two liter. If you ease them in specific things where I can drink soda and whatnot, I might learn something along the way, but For the most part, I'm still too dumb to understand metrics. How many yards are in a two liter? I'll have to check the Googles.

How do you even Google that? I mean, do you want to? We can. I wonder what the Google would say. Let's find out.

How many yards are in a two liter? Let's turn it up and see if it answers for real. Okay. Go back to the Googles. How many yards are in a two liter?

Two liters is 0.00262 yards. To convert from liters to yards, divide unit of volume by approximately 764.6. Ha! She mathed on your ass. Took her a second, though.

She's like, oh, what are these idiots asking now? They must be Americans. Don't know how to metric shit. This is going to be the podcast from now on. Us asking Google stupid shit.

I mean, it's a lateral move. Let's just put it that way. What's the square root of that tree? I don't know what tree you're talking about. Can you take a picture of the tree?

Well, then I'll have to image it and see if I can reference find another tree that's similar to that one. And then maybe that one's from like Europe and it'll know. Be like, oh, that tree has 48 gallons. This is getting cut, isn't it? Sadly, no.

If I say extra dumb shit, let's just take into account that I got hit in the head the other day in a car wreck. Who knows what's going to happen? That's true. You did have an impact to your brain more than usual. Normally, all the head trauma is J.

This time, it was you. Yeah, I was in a car wreck. Some jackass hit and ran. People suck. I hate people.

Have I mentioned people suck? I think I have. So anyways, yeah, I was dizzy yesterday. That's not good. You might need to see a medical professional.

I've been okay today. All right then. Aside from asking silly ass questions like leaders and trees and whatever. So back to our other intro. Wonderfest.

I tried to kill it because we do it too much and it was out of control. And every year we'd be like, and then that one time. See, I started trying to feed it and just mislead things and be like, remember that time your mom married George Romero? And so, we were just trying to throw people off for a while. And I was like, good, maybe we can not intro with weird wedding nonsense.

She just had our anniversary weekend this time, and she's out of town. She went to the beach. And then this year happened. So, now, by design, we'll have to sidetrack here. Are you marrying George Romero?

By design, if only. Wait, is Mrs. Romero? She was still around. Maybe I can take over the Romero empire.

I will make all zombie movies from here on out. They will all end in Of the Dead. Well, duh. Mall of the Dead. We're going to do a part two of part two.

Wonderfest of the Dead. So, to preface the fact that, and anybody, I don't know why you're listening at this point, but anybody listening will know at this point we've fractured off our peoples. And it was by design because nobody wanted to do it all the damn time. And eventually we got to where only people were doing this, and you'll do this, and you'll do this. And it was just easier, and that's the way they liked it half the time anyway.

It was like, I just want to watch horror movies. Leave me alone. So we sectioned off into little ones. So as I say this person, they're on the show all the time, but I don't think you've ever crossed paths with them. So Nora has become a full-on regular cast member and is on more than most people these days.

So she's become our go-to. She's super cool. She's into horror. And this year. She's marrying George Romero?

She found... He's about as cool. That's the thing. She found some dude. And at first we were like, I don't know about this.

I think the horror club has to approve any incoming dudes. Is she marrying my mom? And then I was like, turns out we like this dude. So we approved. And then she could go on with it.

So... okay, whatever. Then she had some like a engagement party and that was weird going there and having to interact with people. And so, you know, Philip and I sat in the corner and didn't talk to anyone. But then finally the invitation came and I'm like, all right, whatever. I guess I'm going to have to go to this thing and I'm writing it on the calendar.

Guess what day it's on? Today! Today! Wonderfest weekend! She's getting married on Wonderfest day.

Did she not listen to all the old episodes? We went into this whole thing of like, look, you can't have your wedding at the same time as Wonderfest. We might have to hang out with George Romero or some other random people. I didn't see Greg Nicotero in there. He's here somewhere.

Actually, he was giving a talk because they said it earlier when I got in here. He was doing a like, 40 years in the industry. I was just thinking if I had to marry anybody in there. You're going with Greg? Yeah.

Because he's a rock star. Yeah. And he owns restaurants, so money rolling in from different avenues. With greasy hair. Yes, I think he's legally changed his name.

Even when he's in Paris, people are like, oh, you. Whatever, dude. So, yeah, that was my thing. I was like, of all weekends for you to decide to get married on, what the hell? It's a nice day to do, though.

I'm hoping it stays this way. As far as weather, I mean. Because later they were talking about, like, rain, and I know, I don't think they were hoping for rain. Rain's good luck on a wedding. Isn't it ironic?

Anyway. Oh, my God. It's not, actually. Nothing in that song is ironic. It's just shitty.

Well, she made money off of it, so take that, suckers. Anyway. I'm sorry. I have a big issue with that song. I fucking hate that song.

Nothing in there is ironic. Nothing. Not a goddamn thing. It's just shitty luck. Oh!

Like her and all but that is like the least of those songs of that era i'm like that one's weird but it's awful fuck that song otherwise she seems cool enough as canadian chicks go but anyway yes i i was like now Not only do I have to go to Wonderfest and deal with my, you know, interacting with humans and whatnot. There were so many people in there today. But then I have to go and, like, change and put on, like, monkey clothes and go to a wedding. What the hell, Nora? Like, literally a monkey outfit?

Because that would be awesome. What the hell? Actually, I did. And she was sending out, like, rules. Because, you know, she knows the two of us will be there and we're children, essentially.

So, like, she was sending out rules to everybody. But, of course... Being the weirdos. I was like, um... Because I think they made a rule, and I like this.

I think you will totally approve of this. No children. Fucking A. That's what I'm saying. Who brings a baby to a wedding?

They'll be crying, and kids will be running around being obnoxious. At what age do they draw the line? What? At what age do they draw the line? I'm in my 40s, but I still feel like a child.

Yeah, you might not qualify. But, I don't know, maybe we have to give a test at the beginning, and they'll like... hold out some legos and you'll be like nope get out so i don't know maybe there's a test on the way in and i'm gonna fail but as. You have to offer to share your cookies to make it in there because then you're screwed i don't fucking share my cookies with anybody. So then the other rule was as we were asking ridiculous follow-up question mine was like how about a howler monkey can i bring a howler monkey of course yes fine whatever And I was like, is it okay if he's in? Somebody has to ask, does he have to wear a tuxedo?

And I'm like, well, I expect him to. I mean, it would be ridiculous for me to bring a howler monkey and not dress him up fancy. Hold on, you have a howler monkey and you didn't bring him to water dress with us? Exactly. These are my questions for people.

I don't think I could afford a howler monkey, nor am I responsible enough to take care of a monkey. So if scatters taught us anything, don't get a monkey. I don't know what that is. Isn't that Elvis? Pretty sure Scatter was Elvis's, which did not have a good end, as most things around the Presley household.

As of lately, when they almost lost the household again. So, the whole run usually goes badly eventually. But back in the day, it was cool. Just a cool, weird dude with a monkey. That's where I'm heading.

I'm just poor. I am older now than Elvis was. Isn't that scary? I made it longer than Elvis did. Isn't that fucking weird?

I don't know about this aging thing. I mean, seriously, if you think about it, that's fucking weird. I. Who are eternally 11. I'm older than Elvis was when he passed away.

Who seemed like an old man towards the end there. I know. He just looked rough. It's not his fault. Drugs, dude.

Drugs. Just say no, okay? Because drugs is bad. It's bad. Just say no, little bobcat.

That's what I keep telling people. I know. They don't listen. It's stuck in my head all these years. I don't know where it came from, except for you.

It came from me. Oh, if anybody knows, put it in our comments. Send me an email. As if anybody's listening. Oh, they're not.

Especially after this ramble. Yeah, no shit. And this is why I'm hardly ever on the show anymore. But. So far off the rails.

I thought that was, yeah, that was a ridiculous coincidence that like, obviously she wasn't listening. As we went over this every year, you can't have a wedding on the same day as Wonderfest. We got stuff to do. We don't have time for weddings. My mom is still married, so apparently it came.

Out good for her. Maybe it is good luck. So far, like I said, I approve of the dude. So we're on the right track. She's found a good, solid dude.

He's kind of a goof. I like that. And getting married on Wonderfest, so maybe they got a shot. She doesn't come to Wonderfest, though. No, but it doesn't matter.

Neither did your mom. So there you go. It's all come full circle. They're going to make it. Was her wedding originally planned for like right now and you made her?

That's the thing. I was like, luckily, I will give her credit. She did have it later in the day, like you're supposed to. In case you need to go hang out with a zombie type dude early in the day, put your wedding later in the day. So that way it can all happen.

I mean, can you imagine how much I would never let it go if she'd maybe miss George Romero for her wedding? You would have given her shit forever. Duh. Especially once he passed away. I'd be like, dude.

Well, I could have seen him, mom. Would have been a lot of that. I feel like since he was in the area, you should have gone there, picked him up, and taken him. Like, this is my plus one, George Romero. And everybody would be like, who the fuck's this little guy?

With the big ass glasses. Shut up. Shut up, he's cool. You guys are lame because you don't know who George Romero is. Lame.

I don't come from a big movie horror fan family. Nobody knows anything anymore. I try making my references. I know I'm wasting my time. I really don't.

Well, I throw them out there knowing they're not going to land and then wait to see that I'm right, which I'm pretty much always right. What are you going to do? Regular folk. They're weird. So.

Wonderfest. Wonderfest. It's awesome. I saw things. Look, I bought a thing.

He's right here. I know. I had to lend you a dollar. I gave you a dollar. It's okay.

He's a Godzilla, but he's unofficially a Lego Godzilla. Shh, don't tell Lego. Because they don't already have all the money. Because they do. It's all mine.

I came this year. I was all prepared to buy me some tiny little Godzillas for my boyfriend because he loves Godzilla and the little ones. And this is the first place we started seeing those. Back before there were other conventions, we were coming to Wonderfest. And they had nothing but little Godzillas and then big Godzillas and models of Godzillas.

And now this year, what did you find? None. Goddamn, none. What the hell's up with that? I don't know.

People, get your stuff. That's what I said in there. I was like, especially this year because we've had a one-two punch of new Godzilla movies of legit one that people loved and then like a big crazy popular one. Maybe it all got bought out and there was no more shit to bring. I guess so.

Maybe their last couple of stops, people were like, give me all your Godzillas. And now They don't have no Godzilla. I was like, what? I'm like, I want to be a good girlfriend. I'm going to buy a boyfriend some cute little Godzillas and he's going to be happy and I'll be a good girlfriend.

And goddammit, they shut me down. Let's just pick him some random crap. Be like, here, watch something. He'll be like, what the hell is this? I'll pick some anime crap that even he doesn't know.

And he's the best of the three of us, probably. But, yeah, I was so, because, you know, the little bitty ones, do you still have the, you don't have the little Rodan in your bag anymore? No, I think that was a different bag. He's on, I think he's sitting next to my TV now. Okay, cool.

I found him and, like, relocated him so I could see him more often, because Rodan's awesome. I mean, there was, like, one or two cute Godzilla, but they weren't, like, tiny. Like, the ones we saw that were, like, ten bucks a piece, I'm like, that's pretty cute. Again, those were all, like, imported. Yeah, but I think those, like, they have those on all the...

Because they'd all have crazy writings on them, and I'd be like, I don't know what this says, but I'm assuming it's Godzilla. They have them on AliExpress and I was going to get them off there because they had the same ones that they just fucking had in there for ten bucks. Because I saw them on here and I was going to get them and I'm like, ooh, look at that Godzilla. Is it cheaper? It's probably cheaper on AliExpress because most things are.

I mean, I'd say normally that stuff's a knockoff but they are not like the original ones are kind of. I'm sure they're not licensed. I'm sure it's just some weird dude with a plastic machine making a Godzilla that didn't pay Toho any money. So, it's fine. Some knockoff things are acceptable.

See, for like, I could get the whole damn set for $ 35. There you go. Fucking free shipping. Of course it is. Well, see, mine, this, mine's knockoff Lego, which I'm going with. but that's a tie-in because i was gonna tell you today but i figured i might as well just tell everybody i was sort of telling on the last episode after we wrapped up i was like because sam is the only other one that cares about my obsession with lego but i think he likes the fact here's my thing because i've i have several people that i know that are into lego i have people that i'm related to that have now like revealed they're like they're liking legos but they treat them like models like they get the model looking ones that are like make a car that's like a big giant car and i'm like that doesn't have minifigs in it unless there's a minifigure i can put in and make them doing a cool thing what are you wasting my time for so i've realized i mean i've realized this years ago when i started trying to get back into it again mine is like a god complex What I want to do is build this whole alternate little world and then have all these little people and I'm in control of every stupid thing they do.

And I'm going to make this world as weird and ridiculous as I want. And I make up the rules and I do whatever I want. So this is also why, like, as I'm becoming more and more antisocial. I'm just going to stay home and be God of my own little world. Sometimes you got to do what you got to do.

Yeah. So I'd kind of tapered off and I wasn't as into, I don't know. I just, I went with post-apocalyptic for a while. Cause I got, I mean, I did go in the hole to get myself an apocalypse Berg because that thing is awesome. Like that is, that will be on display forever.

That's one of the best sets they've ever done. It's ridiculous how cool it is. But, and then I went down that like post-apocalyptic Lego world. But then after a while, like, he can't build stuff because everything's got to be falling apart. And it's really hard, I've realized, to do a Lego set that's not totally put together, that doesn't look like it's falling apart because of post-apocalyptic destruction and just kind of looks like he didn't finish.

So I was like, well, this isn't working. So after a while, I kind of was like, ah, I can't afford it anyway. I'll just not do anything for a while. And I didn't get stuff. And then I saw there was still a set that I thought they'd retired.

And I was like, ah, damn it. If I get that. I could do that other thing I wanted to do. So now it's like alternate universe, kind of a Blade Runner-esque dystopian future. Because I want it to still have buildings and normal stuff, but it's kind of got to be slightly futuristic.

But not that futuristic. And it's not totally run down post-apocalyptic, but they have some high-tech future things too. So it's a nice little balance of whatever the hell I want to put in there, plus lots of robots. So I got robots running around doing all kinds of stuff. I'm iffy on robots.

Well, that's my plan. Because I did it today. I was like, here's your donut shop. And the person behind the counter is going to be a robot. Because normal humans, we're spoiled.

We don't want that lame service job. Because this is kind of where we're going in the real world. So as robots take our jobs because we don't want to do them because we're lazy and spoiled, then eventually they'll realize humans suck and they'll just take us out. And that's my plan. So.

So far, the robots aren't going bad, but we're having problems with the attachments for the people, the cyborg people that are getting parts put on. It's affecting their brains. Oh, yeah. I'm coming up with my own storylines. This is sad.

This is what I do with my time. It's better than some people. That's what I figure, at least by the end. That's my other thing for my alternate future world. The currency will be Lego because those things do not lose value.

No matter what one you get, then you could pay, like your change would be the little two ones, and then you need something that's $ 50, you give them this whole big set. In the fancy, you get the little Lego coins. The little Lego treasure chest. That could happen. I do have a treasure chest.

The coins always disappear, though. They're hard to keep track of. They don't really latch. They don't really connect to anything. Yeah, you just got to put them in the thing and close the lid.

The lid doesn't really latch, so yeah. These are rough times in Lego world. But yeah, I was just like, looking at these sets that came out like 10 years ago that are now like $ 700. I was like, this shit does not depreciate. If ever there was a solid business plan, fucking buy Legos, man, because I can't afford new ones, let alone the retired ones.

It is out of control. So anyway, that's my tie-in. I'm taking all different weird things from slightly futuristic movies and I'm trying to put them in there and come up with a stupid plot device that is giving the narrative of the whole scene. How long until you're making your own Lego movies? I mean, aside from the one I already did.

I did our promo for the Horror Club, Is Us As Legos, and then you've got us doing the voiceover that's just taken straight out of the show, but all the animation is done by me. Is it stop motion? Yeah. It's not bad. I mean, I'm a pretty harsh critic of my own shit, and I was like, I'm pretty happy with this.

It's not bad. Like this one time when I was a kid, me and my cousin Josh did stop motion American Gladiators. This does not surprise me. Yeah. But no, I mean, you can't do like official Lego movie with the mouth moving.

There are people, there are nerds that are online that can like animate it or you can like, but there's, I don't know. So we just sit there and you just look at a person without their mouth moving. It's fine. Or ventriloquists? Yes.

Everyone in there is a ventriloquist. Occasionally their face could change. But you couldn't do it enough to actually, because you'd have to have the right head in like 40 different versions to be able to make it actually talk and do it stop motion. So until Lego wants to come on board with me and finance this project, I got to just do, yeah, it's just a still face and talking. It's fine.

Ventriloquist. It's all about that. So there you go. I've been taking movie ideas and cramming them into a Lego world. That's my movie tie-in for that.

I haven't watched any movies at all. That's my next question. Have you seen any movies? Nope. Son of a bitch.

Have you done anything geek-oriented? You did go out into the world and do things. I don't go anywhere, but you left the area. I went to Florida, which is not really fun. I mean, Florida's its own little world, really.

The highlight was we did go to Bucky's and I got their breakfast taco. Their eggs. It's eggs and brisket in a taco. Which is technically more like a burrito. Now I have to say it.

Go ahead. Ugh, there's egg in mine. Which is my comment when you asked how the taco was. Because it's like, why do they call it a taco? Because it's literally wrapped up in like a burrito.

I mean, that's kind of what I do myself now. Most of the time, I don't make like real food during the week. I don't have time for that shit. But on the weekends, I don't have anything else to do. So I'm like, I will make.

I started doing like a burrito. But then I was like, I was also in that mode of like in dinnertime versions, I was making like quesadillas. So I was like, what if I took the burrito and then I put it on the fire over here and it's like a grilled burrito. It's almost kind of like a quesadilla, but it's also got fat stuff in it. So it's a burrito.

Remember that one they used to have at Taco Bell? The grilled stuff burrito? Yes. It was really good. Then they changed the thing.

Because I used to get that all the time. Number one, they jacked up the price. This was before the recent. Now everything's a fucking fortune. It is ridiculous how much Taco Bell is right now.

But it used to be an affordable version, and it was really good, and it had some sort of magical sauce that they'd dump in there, and it was great. I didn't have sauce in mine, I don't think. It had rice in it, though, didn't it? It did have rice in it. Yeah.

But then they changed. I went there one time, didn't know any better, went in and was like, hey, Grilled Stuff Burrito. They were like, okay. First of all, it was like three times as expensive. Mm-hmm.

And it became like a steak version. Like, you could only get, I don't even think they would do the grilled, like the beef or however. Like, I think it just came as like a double the steak, except the steak wasn't really good. And then like the sauce was either gone or they changed it with some other thing and it had a weird flavor. And I was like, what have you done to your grilled stuff?

I'm still incredibly angry at Taco Bell for having getting rid of the double decker taco. I thought they came back. Did they? They brought back the Mexican pizza. They brought back the Mexican pizza because I didn't realize I liked those as much until they went away and I was like, son of a bitch, I did get those sometimes.

So now I'm kind of glad it's back. It is. I mean, you have to take out a loan to go to Taco Bell because I swear if you get like three things, it's like $ 20 now. If you get a value meal and add a thing... It's like $ 70.

99 for one person at Taco Bell is $ 20. This is out of control. I used to fucking love the Double Decker Taco Bell. And Boyfriend will go on. Enchiritos.

The old Enchirito was pretty damn good, I gotta say. I thought there was a version now, but it's kind of different. I don't like different. Again, as we said today, they moved the water dish and we can't find it now and we're confused. Leave our stuff alone, man.

You're gonna stick your face under the water bottle filler. Yeah, we didn't even have a water fountain. There's a water bottle and you can shove your hand in it and rinse your hand off, but if you don't have a bottle, you gotta pretend like you're at the pond. Yeah. I'm drinking out the pond.

Yeah. Changing stuff. Double-decker tacos. That's the only kind of tacos I'll make now. Yeah.

They did make the home version. Maybe that's why they quit doing it. Because I don't know if Taco Bell sponsored it, but like the other one, El Paso or somebody made their own at-home how to make a double-decker taco. They just give you both versions of, here's a hard show, here's a soft show. Get to it.

I don't think they actually planned for people to make double-decker tacos. They're just like, here, make a whole bunch of tacos. I thought there was one they marketed like that, though. I don't know. Either way, I mean, if you got a little sense to, you can figure it out.

I'm screwed, then. But yes, Bucky's breakfast, it was, like I said, eggs. brisket wrapped in a tortilla that was really fresh tasting. Oh my God. See, I was worried at first. I'm like, are they going to have barbecue sauce on it?

Because usually when you buy the brisket, it's like smothered in barbecue sauce. It's pre-barbecue sauce. Which is fucking delicious. But I'm thinking, do I want that for breakfast? Eggs and barbecue sauce.

But no, it is un-barbecue sauced and just brisket and eggs. Mm-hmm. I mean, I'm not going to argue about that. Meat and eggs. I'd have some of that.

Hell yeah, it was good, too. Costs like seven damn dollars. There you go. Once again, not cheap wherever you go. Fucking A.

Food is out of control. I know. Why are we still eating? I don't know. Usually I feel gross, too.

I was like, can they just give me, again, future world, can they just give me pills? Can I just have future astronaut food? Can I just eat toothpaste tubes full of whatever the hell is going to make me not keel over? Just substantive sustenance. That's all I need.

I know, right? Luckily, I got food at home, so I ain't got to worry about that today. Because with car repairs, I'm kind of broke right now. Which may be a good thing. I didn't find anything good at the Wonderfest.

I'm broke all the time. This is why I get in trouble buying the most expensive thing in the world. Yeah. Like, let's have this as your thing you're into. Like, goddammit.

You guys are too freaking expensive. I've been lately obsessed with buying a specific face of Barbie doll. The Steffy Face Barbie. That's all I want. Everything else could fuck right on off.

She had a resting Steffy Face. Oh, she's the prettiest one. She's the one. It was my favorite Barbie when I was growing up. One of my favorite Barbies when I was growing up.

She had the Steffy Face. That's not, you know. Her face. That face. Alright, alright.

I can see getting into that. So yeah, that's my new thing. Collecting Steffy Face Barbies. I haven't gone down the Barbie road. I'm sticking with Legos at this point.

But I can see that as an option for someone. Mm-hmm. So I have a whole shelf full of stuffy face Barbie dolls right now. And let me tell you, some of those are not cheap. I don't know why.

Collectory things, I'm telling you. They know they got you over a barrel, and they're just like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. We'll charge you whatever we want for this. Oh, because I figured, oh, I think Barbie, like the traditional Barbie face would probably be more sought after, more collectible. You would think.

The older versions. No, no, it's, yeah, apparently it's not. I guess like the older, older ones when you get into like the traditional, like the, you know, the old, old ones. Francie? Yeah.

I think she was the first one. I don't know. I thought she was like pre-Barney. I'm not that far into it. All I know is.

I just remember they did a reissued one. Again, hanging out at toy stores. I remember they did a reissued one and I was like, who is it? I was calling her Frenchie. I think her name was actually like Francie or something.

But she was like, I think maybe even Mattel Maynard. And it was sort of the one that they went, this isn't working. But what if we retool this? And she became Millicent. Barbara, Millicent, Roberts, thank you very much.

It's sad that I knew Millicent. Let's get real. This is how you know you're a toy dork. I knew Barbie's actual name. I just busted out the whole full name.

But you are a Barbie person. That makes a little more sense. I just hung out at toy stores all of my life. It was better when I was getting paid to do it. Now I just go in places and be like, I can't afford these things.

Can I touch the Legos? Is that okay? But it's like now that I'm like full on, I want to collect these things, where do I get them? They don't make toy stores no more. I hate to tell you.

You got to just loiter at the internets or come to a convention. I went to the Toy and Antiques mall the other day. That's true. I found one of them. They're pretty cool.

I found one of them there. I had the German one. You can't afford the German one. She was on sale. She's import prices. $ 26.

That's not bad, I guess. For collector prices, that's not bad. When they did American dolls of the world, so she's made in America. Dolls of Germany. Well, they had Germany.

I got a fucking Peruvian Barbie. I've been obsessed with Whatnot lately. Any kind of Whatnot? No, just Whatnot, the website. The buy and shit site.

I bought so much shit off Whatnot. See, I try not to get too far in on other weird stuff. Like, I got myself in trouble enough being back into the Lego. Like, I've now found all of the weird knockoff. I usually don't support knockoff Lego stuff.

I like the official stuff because it's better. But I found such weird variation things that I'm like, ah, damn it. I might have to get some of these and work them into my crazy ass future world. Speak of the devil. There's a stuffy face doll on there currently.

We're watching the video of her right now. This is from the back. They're putting her on a stand. I only want to show the back of the outfit. I think I have that one already, though.

How much is she? Let's just have a thing of us watching. I mean, I have pictures of some of the Lego fun. Mostly because I was going to make you look at them. Let's see if I can find my future world.

Oh, $ 20! I can keep that damn bar. That's bananas. I did take my old-timey building and I decided my way of making it into this bastardized, dystopian future. was there's now a rooftop disco. Oh, hell.

So there's the disco, and then out here's the cool place where the patio people hang out. Oh, God. Cool patio people. They're super cool. Because who wants to hang out in the weird disco people inside?

The cool kids are all hanging out out front. Obviously. They are cool, because this girl's got cat ears on. I've decided that's the thing. Now it's just going to be, because before I didn't use that, because it was post-apocalyptic.

Everybody had to look like they're in rags or wearing something that's going to murder people. Oh, no, no, because then you're going to have your select group of people that are still, like, you know, fancy as shit, dude. This one, well, I did work that into my old storyline. I was like, even though the world has gone to hell, there's going to be a handful of people who still have more money than you, and they're going to make a super fancy little world, and then they're not going to let all the rest of this riffraff in. Obviously.

It's like, that's how civilization works, damn it. So, but this one, I was like, no, now I can make use of all these cool, weird peoples and their outfits, because... Now it's like all the cool kids. That's like everybody in the new future society. Like that's the trend is all the cool stuff.

And it's all about nothing. But, you know, again, it's it's the obey and consume. Buy things, buy things. So the cool kids are all the ones wearing fancy ass outfits. So let's see.

There's the rooftop disco. Oh, there's there's the DJ. He's a robot DJ. That's who will take over. Mostly, I just had to tell you.

Oh, I do have mutant sushi. First of all, this sign is freaking awesome. That is awesome. And then it's run by Blinky. Blinky is the owner.

I'm going to get him a robot arm so he can roll around and still do stuff. I'm also working in Crazy 88. I've just got to get more people. I've just been wanting the flea market at the fairgrounds to happen. The cool one.

Why isn't that happening now when I want stuff? They made that outfit. I was like, that's just the bride, man. I was like, I can't not make a bride. I've also worked in random Tarantino people into my youth. future universe but yeah i'm.

Currently ready for the new flea market the fairgrounds to happen and i want it to happen right now. I mean it was just one of those sort of weekends because i kind of thought for a second i was like wait is it this one oh no it's the other one it's the other fake holiday that's kind of a real holiday it was labor day memorial day one of those and usually nobody remembers which is which anyway right so i was just like is this the one no damn it it's the other one so flea market and that's where you got to go to get your toys these days no doubt. And by the time that one rolls around, I'll be on a fucking shitty schedule and have to work on Saturdays. What's that about? I don't know.

Jobs are dumb. I keep wanting to retire. I mean, I don't have any money. So that's, again, the problem. But every day I was just like, you know, if I just got up when I wanted to and could do the stuff I want to do.

Like, is that too much to ask? I feel like that's the way we're supposed to live life. Wouldn't we enjoy things so much more? But instead we have to go to stupid work. I want to go to stupid old work.

Lame. But then how am I going to afford my Legos? This is the give and take of life. So we decided that I haven't watched anything. Have you watched anything?

I have. I was getting the L list out here. Because once again, I don't remember anything with my brain anymore. I mean, I've watched a lot of ID channel. Like usual.

Like murdering shows? Yeah. Alright. I was just making sure. I was like, I don't watch these channels.

Expedition X. All I watch is... I was thinking that the other day. I was like, most of, other than occasionally prime time, I'll switch back to, like, network-y and see what kind of stuff's on, which there's only one or two things I pay attention to. But I was like, the other, like, 75% of my life is just on me TV.

So I'm just, like, in the middle of the night when normal people are sleeping. I'm up watching Barnaby Jones. What the hell's that about? Is there just, like, a carload of unsupervised children next to us? I mean, you don't want to have to deal with children.

You just get a car so you can put them somewhere. You can even lock them up. That's what's going on today. Did they at least crack a window? I mean, that's the rule, right?

I mean, you don't put animals in cars. I'm pretty sure that one's trying to escape. The children is fine. Just crack a window. They'll be fine.

I'm pretty sure one of them is trying to escape. Tackle them. But we don't want them, so let them run. It's fine. But now, speaking of, I just showed you, I added the, my, I like to sort of bastardize.

I don't want it to be totally official. I just want a close enough version for my Lego world, so I've got a Lego bride. That they made in a set that, I mean, she's wearing the yellow outfit. I was like, this is pretty much just the bride anyway. So, it kind of made me, like, I've been thinking lately.

I was also listening to something and they were talking about the whole one and two of Kill Bill. So, I did go back and re-watch both of the one and two of Kill Bill. Within the span of, like, a ten hour period. So, almost the whole bloody affair. I almost did it full on back to back.

It's pretty badass. I gotta say, like, of things that hold up, it's pretty badass. Is there gonna be a three I like that idea if he quit being a weirdo and be like I'm gonna retire at 10 like just shut up and make movies when you want to make movies you don't need a stupid cap it off at 10 nonsense cause now he's like he had the one he was gonna do and then it was gonna be the last one 10 movies he thinks he's gonna stop at 10 and we're up to 9 So, like, he thinks one more movie and I'm done. Like, why? Who says?

Who cares? Look, I mean, freaking Scorsese is, like, busier now than he ever did. He's an old man. He's still cranking out movies. Spielberg, cranking out movies.

I guess I'm just shocked to find out he's only done ten movies. Well, I mean, he takes his time in between them. I mean, the beginning, it was a couple of years. And then after that, it would be like five or six years would go by before he'd put something out. So yeah, he used to space them out so much that you might go a decade before the new Tarantino movie would show up.

And some of them weren't worth it. Most of them are pretty solid. I'm not talking about Death Proof, but Death Proof is pretty iffy. I need to rewatch it. It's been a long time since I've seen it, but that was always the weak one.

But yeah, the last one I stand by is pretty damn impressive. Just as like a weird hangout movie. As time goes on, I've rewatched it, and I'm like, there's only a little bit of story story. The rest of it is just sort of hanging out with these characters. And in some cases, I might not be okay with that, but I like it.

It works better the more I watch it and the more you just sort of get into these characters. So yeah, I'm on board with most of this stuff. But Kill Bill, it's pretty badass. So yeah, I'm going to steal those characters and put most of them in there. Crazy 88 roaming the streets.

Slicing people up. Slightly dystopia. It's fine. And also, Michael Madsen, when he wants to do stuff, he's pretty good. I feel like a lot of his other roles, like Tarantino really knows how to use him and make him cool.

And then you see him in other stuff and you're like, oh God, what's he doing now? Back to the Toy and Antique mall. There is a picture in one of the aisles and I'm pretty sure it's supposed to be Roger Moore as James Bond. But whenever I see it, I'm like, is that Michael Madsen? Yeah.

You could have your own Michael Madsen doll. No, it's a caricature, like paint, like a drawing, like artwork. I might have seen this, actually, now that I think about it. Because every time I see it, I'm like, huh, Michael Madsen, because he's wearing like a suit. And then I'm like, wait a second, no, it's not Michael Madsen.

What also reminded me was the building we're sitting right next to is where we saw Michael Madsen. Yeah. We ran into him at a convention. It was not Wonderfest, so thankfully, I don't think they want anything to do with him. But there was another one going on in the same building at one time.

And, yeah, we saw him sitting there. We walked past him. Somebody had to go get him, like, a very specific beverage. It was, I don't know, RC or something. You know, something weird.

I feel like he had a weird soda pop reference that he wanted. I thought he was just looking up for that one chick to hook up with. Oh, he was definitely looking up for that one chick to hook up with, but unofficially, allegedly. We don't really know what happened, but he was definitely interested in this girl. So, yeah.

Oh, Michael Madsen. He can be cool in certain movies. He looks very disgruntled in the photos with me. He's very like. Did you pay him for that photo?

Because I think that's why. No, we did not. I feel like that was a hallway shot. Because we were with Richie. And Richie was trying to...

Because remember Richie knew... It was a whole thing. He thinks he knows him. I'm not sure if he really knows him. But he thinks he knows him.

He just rained on me. That happens. What other craziness did I watch? I did. This is a weird one, but I want to discuss the viewing of it, I guess, more than anything, especially now.

So it is the anniversary of Shrek 2. I don't think I saw it. I couldn't remember. I think we all collectively went and saw the first one, maybe? Because I feel like I saw the first one in the theater and was like, eh, it's fine.

Like, I was never a big Shrek fan. I said that recently, and other people were like, like, they were just, how dare you? And I was like, it's not like it's great cinema. I mean, it's a fun, pop culture-y kind of movie, but even the first one, as I saw it in the theater, I was like, man, this is just nothing but, like, adult humor in something that's supposed to be for kids, basically. So, like, a lot of it was stuff that was a little racy, if you knew what it was.

It's just veiled references that the kids didn't get. But you were like, you know, when the gingerbread cookie, like, spits icing at you, it's like, bite me! Like, that's, I mean, it's layers there. It's a little creepy. It's a little weird if you want to think about it too much.

So, it's that kind of stuff. So, I went, they were doing, like, the anniversary release, so I ended up seeing Shrek 2 in a theater. which is kind of weird too. And I'm watching it because it was like tied to like a kid's party. And I'm watching it going, if you were a kid, I don't know if this even makes sense because every line is a reference. Every line that like everything that freaking donkey says is just like a reference to something else.

He's making references. he's making a reference to like an eighties TV show. He's like, I'm moving on up. You know, it's like every line he says, it's just like a pop culture reference, but they're all 30 to 50 years old. So I was like, if you're watching this as a kid, there's like a basic, super generic, like storybook story, I guess, because every level that people ever like appreciate it and thought it was super funny. It was because it's a pop culture reference. but they're so far removed now that no way in hell is any kid going to have any idea what the references are, or that they're even making a reference.

So I'm just like, I don't know, does this movie even function as a movie anymore? If you take out the entire structure of it being nothing but pop culture references, does it even function as a fairytale movie? I mean, it kind of basically does. But I was like, I kind of want to go and ask the kids that were there and be like, Did any of this make sense to you? Why do you think he said this?

Because I know what it's a reference to. But you're not gonna. So why does it seem like this person. Because all of them really. Donkey does it the most.

But everybody makes all these references to other things. To movies at the time that were popular. And old TV shows. And just general pop culture shit. And I'm just like.

I don't know how this would function. If I was like a little kid watching it now. So I'm going to have to start asking. At least kids I know. I don't want to hang out with random weird kids.

You're going to be that guy hanging out at the theater. Not really, because I don't want to interact with children. I barely tolerate the ones I'm related to. So I'm going to have to sit down and be like, okay, let's settle. I still haven't seen my stepsisters two youngest.

You're the greatest aunt ever. I couldn't think of their names if my life depended on it. At least I know mine. I see them pretty regularly. But I am going to have to like start quizzing them and be like, all right, what's your follow up report on the movie?

That should be your new podcast. It would be you. Asking kids. No, you and your one niece and you're going to make her watch a movie and then like talk about it. I don't think she'd go for that as usual.

Like she's too cool for that. She is like she's too cool to hang out with her. She's the one I don't see that much anymore because now she has like a life. She has a boyfriend. The hell's up with that?

That was weird. Weird. So, yeah, I think she's too cool to hang out with me these days. I might be able to suck her the older one, and the younger one, she's all over the place. She's still a little kid, so she's just, every two seconds, she's doing some other crazy stuff.

That's like me. Pretty much. It's hard enough to wrangle you into doing this, so I'm trying to get a six-year-old, or whatever she is now. Five or six, or I don't know. I can't keep count.

See? You're as bad as I am. I know her name, at least. Yeah. I always forgot the ages.

I'm just like, I don't know about this big. Yay tall. Just hold your arm up. It's like that. One of those kids.

Alright, I'm getting rained on. We're going to have to. I'm not. It must be coming from that direction. See it?

We haven't rambled about silliness long enough. Did we talk about Wonderfest at all? I mean, as much as we ever do. So, there you go. I've watched some stuff, and you've not watched some stuff.

I've watched a lot of dead people shows. Is there anything interesting? Are you piecing together a bigger story out of these dead people shows? I can't tell you that. Well, can you figure out mysteries now?

Oh, totally. Okay, there you go. That's all that's important. I am working on solving some crimes. The only one I see, because I don't turn it to dead people shows, it's just like Friday nights, that's the only thing that's on.

So there's usually like a two-hour block of nothing but let's recount this horrible murder situation. And it'll be on in the background while I'm doing something else. And I'm just like, Man, they're slow at telling the story. That's my issue with murder shows. Wait till you find a murder that you know who the killer is, but the fucking people who are in charge won't do anything about it.

And then you're like, oh my God, I know who did it. You know who did it. Why are we not solving this problem officially? Sounds like you need a podcast. West Memphis 3, I'm telling you.

Murder podcasts are the way to go. You can murder in the building yourself. Yeah, I do. People get into that shit. I don't, but that's just me.

I'm very specific. I've gotten super picky on which podcast I will bother with these days. I don't even listen to podcasts anymore. Even you've gotten away from them. Now you're on your books on tape.

Yeah, books on. yeah that's what i still call them because i'm an old man yeah books on tape books on tape granted they haven't been on tapes in 30 years or more but that's still what i think of when i'm like yeah they do those books on tape all right well wonderfest it's been fun it's been a thing i'm glad we were back it's like our second home We're still kind of, I've always said we're the bastard side of the bastard children, stepchildren over there, some other table. But we're still kind of there. We still were welcomed in enough to come to the party. And I appreciate it. Yeah.

It's cool to see stuff. Buy little Godzillas. Look for more little Godzillas. Or not buy little Godzillas. I got my little Godzilla.

You just want a different Godzilla. You're going to have to branch out with your Godzillas. But awesome as always. So thanks. to wonderfest for letting us be part of the show again they will be back they're they're booked up usually way in advance because even like i've thought of times before of like people will get like hotel rooms and get stuff you know just plan ahead their hotel rooms sell out like. 10 months in advance like they it has such a following that people are already booking for next year so you should be one of those people doing that so i'm sure they have already mapped out.

Next year May 31st through June 1st, 2025. There you go. See, usually they've already planned ahead that they're advertising it on this year's stuff. So you can plan accordingly and get it together and get yourself here for next year. Wonderfest.com.

So go to Wonderfest.com. Set yourself up for that very weekend. And then you can get yourself a hotel. Get it quick before they sell out. But there's also several more right down the street that-a-way that you can get a nearby hotel.

And you can be a part of all the festivities. And if you see us, we may or may not acknowledge that you exist. Eh, we don't really talk to people. Ugh, people are awful. I mean, maybe not you.

You're cool. But most people. But not you. Yeah, you're cool. If you're obviously, you're this far in on this, you must be awesome.

So, you can hang out with us, or at least we might wave to you from far away. We're antisocial. What do you want? I'd like you to leave the house and come here. But we're glad we did.

Thank you to Wonderfest. Go to wonderfest.com and be here next year. Anything else to pass along to people? Nope. All right.

Well, this has been our crazy rambling journey. Thank you for coming along on this journey. Otherwise, that about does it. We will return next time. Same geek feed.

Thanks for listening. Bye. We are the lights. We'll tempt you and. Turn you on.

Live in our. Hearts and play with your man. For these are your toys. Hold them in. Right into life They still become your toys.

This is your game. Nice. We'll tap. Let them go, let them go, let them go You'll have. Your reasons again and again For letting them go, for letting them go Stand by the wall Watch as they shoot Oh, no.

But yeah, married. On Wonderfest Day! This episode is a production of Movie Meltdown, produced and edited by The Oddity Studios, with opening music performed by The Empires. For more on how to sponsor or support the show, email producer at moviemeltdown.com. Talk hard!

This program is a proud member of the Battleship Pretension Fleet.